🎨 Artcow Iconoclast / Jonathan Mack Sweet - The Chris-Chan of Arkansas

[ToroidalBoat]

Did anyone read the cartoon Sweet linked to?

I could barely read it, because the handwriting is, to be honest, not that great, and the lines are spli-
-t often like th-
-is which adds to the difficulty.

Like you, I came to the conclusion that the guy was pretty rational, and the pie thrower was acting irrational. I suppose the situation is reversed in the mind of Iconoclast.

Although I'm pleased that he didn't resort to making the guy talk like Jar Jar Binks for once.

(I also saw a lot of white out used, apparently)

 

[MrsFrizzle]

A bum living in a decrepit shack drew a shitty cartoon mocking us? Oh, the overwhelming shame of it all!

 

[Shadow Fox]

Did anyone read the cartoon Sweet linked to? It was interesting. The cartoon version of evil college conspiracy guy #15 drops a bunch of quotes from Kiwis and elsewhere about how Sweet is basing his view of women on one bad experience, and the response is literally that the guy gets a pie in the face.

There's no devastating counter-argument, just a childish silencing. The guy comes off as right, and Sweet comes off as deeply in denial.

He knows the truth, deep down, but it's so much easier to just shut reality out and retreat to the Hugbox Dimension

I looked at it and couldn't get over the guy's fucking lobster claw hand in the first panel. I know that no one ever TOLD Sweetums how to draw hands, but jfc.

More seriously, that's a very interesting observation, and says a lot about Sweet's maturity and his ability to defend his ideas and positions. In the picture's description he further insists that the only reason he developed this skewed idea of college life and interpersonal relationships is because somebody told him to open his mind and think beyond his limited life experiences - and that when he did (more than likely making a sullen, half-hearted attempt, like any child being told by an authority figure to try harder at something he doesn't want to do), all the shit with Ashlaaaay went down.

In other words, someone told him to change and it led to horrible things. Change is Sweet's scapegoat for literally everything.

 

[Le Bateleur]

It just hit me: Sweet isn't trollshielding with Chris, A-Log style. He's literally jealous.

Chris is younger, probably healthier, with a nicer house, a bigger tugboat and a far more successful comic. Also Chris can drive.

 

[John Titor]

Sweet Bro: I don't think you have autism based solely on the hospital incident. That would be as foolish as basing my whole concept of college dating on a single relationship I had in college...

I think you're autistic because you are:
• Self-admittedly socially awkward
• Self-admittedly bad at picking up on unwritten rules of conduct
• Almost 40 and still very interested in colourful children's cartoons, particularly those with anthropomorphic or non-human characters
• Generally unempathetic
• Unhappy at changes to familiar routines or environments
• Given to dressing in an idiosyncratic manner

Did anyone read the cartoon Sweet linked to? It was interesting. The cartoon version of evil college conspiracy guy #15 drops a bunch of quotes from Kiwis and elsewhere about how Sweet is basing his view of women on one bad experience, and the response is literally that the guy gets a pie in the face.

There's no devastating counter-argument, just a childish silencing. The guy comes off as right, and Sweet comes off as deeply in denial.

He knows the truth, deep down, but it's so much easier to just shut reality out and retreat to the Hugbox Dimension

I stopped after a few sentences because I can't stand his bad hand writing. Is anybody here brave enough to do a transcript?

 

[Shadow Fox]

I stopped after a few sentences because I can't stand his bad hand writing. Is anybody here brave enough to do a transcript?

Spoiler: Just for you

Panel 1:
Dr. Leo Greer here once again to express a concern about the content of this comic... We are NOT a raving pack of perverts and sex maniacs in the university system. On behalf of my colleagues, I would like to take this opportunity now to set the record straight.
The creator of this series has based his suppositions about college relationships on his trifling sexual misadventure with some little girl that pranked him years ago, and he assumed that's normal. Now maybe it is...

Panel 2:
...where HE is from; but where I come from, we date adult women...not vapid, supercilious nitwits. Furthermore, the overwhelmingly sexist belief espoused by this comic's creator that he may one day return to school whereupon a cabal of morally-depraved young women will run to hop on his mutton-chopped d--k - putting aside a moment the arrogance in thinking that this bevy of sex-starved harlots'd even look twice at a middle-aged man with as many physical problems as he manifests -

Panel 3:
- should offend anyone who isn't a woman or a dedicated educator. Finally, I wish to address this series' creator's claim that his loving little DNA dumpster abandoned him because he offended her Catholic beliefs. My take on that is, that popish little popinjay was no more religious than the man in the moon -

Panel 4:
[SFX: SPLUTTCH]

Panel 5:
(spittoo) This is no less than what I've come to expect from this neocon lunatic outfit.

 

[Holdek]

I like to think that, deep down, Sweet knows we have the measure of him. We're not EDiots pointing and shouting obscenities, we're not hit-and-run funsters posting links to the SNL sketch on his guestbook - we're rational, resourceful, relentless curators of lulz who have pieced together his story from across the internet. When he's faced with a stronger foe, Sweet retreats to a safe place and mutters rude things.

We're basically the internet version of that scary pack of four dogs that meant he never learned to drive.

I do also like how Sweet is claiming he couldn't afford photocopying at college, because he had to pay for laundry, and "snacks and incidentals". Snacks? Snacks?! Sweet chunters endlessly about three aspects of college life - the chinaphone, big-screen TVs, and "sumptuous buffet dining, three times a day". Sweet Bro paid upfront for three buffets a day, and still felt the need to buy snacks.

Seriously, if you're that hungry, why not just put some buffet food in your pocket for later?

We're like machines in an Autism Matrix. Iconoclast is not the first time we have encountered an LOLcow, and we have become exceedingly efficient at collecting lulz.

 

[DrChristianTroy]

Spoiler: Just for you

Panel 1:
Dr. Leo Greer here once again to express a concern about the content of this comic... We are NOT a raving pack of perverts and sex maniacs in the university system. On behalf of my colleagues, I would like to take this opportunity now to set the record straight.
The creator of this series has based his suppositions about college relationships on his trifling sexual misadventure with some little girl that pranked him years ago, and he assumed that's normal. Now maybe it is...

Panel 2:
...where HE is from; but where I come from, we date adult women...not vapid, supercilious nitwits. Furthermore, the overwhelmingly sexist belief espoused by this comic's creator that he may one day return to school whereupon a cabal of morally-depraved young women will run to hop on his mutton-chopped d--k - putting aside a moment the arrogance in thinking that this bevy of sex-starved harlots'd even look twice at a middle-aged man with as many physical problems as he manifests -

Panel 3:
- should offend anyone who isn't a woman or a dedicated educator. Finally, I wish to address this series' creator's claim that his loving little DNA dumpster abandoned him because he offended her Catholic beliefs. My take on that is, that popish little popinjay was no more religious than the man in the moon -

Panel 4:
[SFX: SPLUTTCH]

Panel 5:
(spittoo) This is no less than what I've come to expect from this neocon lunatic outfit.

I know it was mentioned but the pie thrower comes off like a douche in this scenario.

 

[Shadow Fox]

Sweetie Pie sperging again hardcore over at the Patriot Brony forums:

Spoiler: tl;dr

I mentioned it only to show what an unfeeling, selfish, lying monster my brother is, and you turned it around against me...just as you do all my stories. You twist it around no make it seem as if they are the hero, and I'm just some ingrate savage. So screw you.

P. sure nobody's said jack about his brother being a hero for abandoning him at the hospital. Everyone is rightfully captivated by the sheer ridiculousness of a grown man stumbling around a (presumably very small) hospital for a full third of a day.

I have nothing against the working man, it just isn't for me. I've learned that. It's a little something called the law of diminishing returns. The more I've put into the system, the less I get out of it, and the worse my life gets. So I've simply opted out.

Opted out, but still expects to be supported by people who do work for a living! Typical liberal entitlement.

My brother started taking over my life after I lost my last two jobs. He just decided one day he could control my money better than me, so he began taking more and more of it-- running up all my credit cards, borrowing my petty cash for cigarettes, confiscating the shedful of cans I'd spend my summer collecting, even forging my signature to drain my bank account.

I'd wonder why he never sought assistance from the police or tried to explain the forgery and credit card fraud to the bank, but I know all the explanation I'd get would be bluh bluh liberals progressives coloreds ASU conspiracy.

Those jobs brought me nothing but ten years of misery, the loss of my basic freedoms and liberties, physically and emotionally-crippling abuse, shattered dignity, and ruined health. I don't need that again.

Now, what would your Republican idols say about that work ethic, SweetTart? Tsk, tsk.

I'm not going to go out and get hired on for work I hate and barely understand how to do,

Insert NOBODY TOLD ME HOW TO [X] joke here.

with coworkers who resent me, a boss who might up and skip town the first chance he gets, and moronic customers who go around sampling the candy off the shelves and then refusing to buy it or try to get me in trouble by offering to sell me stolen goods.

I'm noticing a distressing tendency of Sweetums to make broad, sweeping generalizations based on singular incidents from his life. I'm pretty sure the only thing he mentions here that was a recurring feature across his handful of jobs was his coworkers not liking him, and we can all guess why that was so.

Why bother with a low-paying, soul-crushing job I'll probably only have a few weeks, and then go home just to watch His Stupidness grab away another 5-10 years of my life to punish me for my failure? That's like prison, don't you get it?

I thought Baby Bro was in rehab or something. Why haven't we heard an angry screed about knuckle-walking and nuh-nuh-nuhing celebrating the return of his beloved sibling to the family hovel?

I'd rather work smarter, not harder. I want to start my own business-- and not just a business, but a little corner of the world where I can start rebuilding my life the way it used to be. The site I've chosen is close to both the community college and a McDonald's-- my own little Paradise. I just have to figure out how raise the money to buy my slice of ASU on the Outside.

Yeah, that's great. It means nothing if he just sits around twiddling his thumbs and takes no actual steps toward realizing his plans. And how much will this idea cost him compared to taking the tugboat + can money he already has and just renting an apartment somewhere?

So why should I go see anybody? I know how that goes-- I admit to having a problem, and then people start treating me differently. They start thinking I'm maybe not good enough to control my life, so slowly they start cutting me back, and cutting me back, and cutting me back, and then pretty soon I have nothing. Again, I tried that already. I hated it. "Leo Greer" may seem perfectly reasonable to you, but he is no more than a liar and a shill. You'd do well to realize that.

Funny thing is, there's no evidence to suggest that all those people thinking Sweet can't manage his own life are actually wrong.

Why don't you educate yourself on the ploy of the minimum wage, Holly, and then come back and talk to me, hm?
The minimum wage was one of those oh-so-great ideas to come out of your precious Gilded Age, along with the unions, feminism, and social welfare programs-- you know, all the things you people have bungled and corrupted?

The minimum wage mess is too convoluted to go into on a forum about internet laughingstocks, so I won't. Loling at Sweets the Tugboat Captain shittalking social welfare programs, though.

There were only two good things to come from that era-- incandescent light bulbs and the internal combustion engine. Surprise, surprise-- guess which ones the modern "progressive"s want to get rid of?

Noes, not muh lightbulbs!

Bonus hilarity: One of Sweet's fellow forumites gave him "Great Writer" award badge thingy.

 

[DrChristianTroy]

Sweetie Pie sperging again hardcore over at the Patriot Brony forums:

Spoiler: tl;dr

P. sure nobody's said jack about his brother being a hero for abandoning him at the hospital. Everyone is rightfully captivated by the sheer ridiculousness of a grown man stumbling around a (presumably very small) hospital for a full third of a day.


Opted out, but still expects to be supported by people who do work for a living! Typical liberal entitlement.


I'd wonder why he never sought assistance from the police or tried to explain the forgery and credit card fraud to the bank, but I know all the explanation I'd get would be bluh bluh liberals progressives coloreds ASU conspiracy.


Now, what would your Republican idols say about that work ethic, SweetTart? Tsk, tsk.


Insert NOBODY TOLD ME HOW TO [X] joke here.


I'm noticing a distressing tendency of Sweetums to make broad, sweeping generalizations based on singular incidents from his life. I'm pretty sure the only thing he mentions here that was a recurring feature across his handful of jobs was his coworkers not liking him, and we can all guess why that was so.


I thought Baby Bro was in rehab or something. Why haven't we heard an angry screed about knuckle-walking and nuh-nuh-nuhing celebrating the return of his beloved sibling to the family hovel?


Yeah, that's great. It means nothing if he just sits around twiddling his thumbs and takes no actual steps toward realizing his plans. And how much will this idea cost him compared to taking the tugboat + can money he already has and just renting an apartment somewhere?


Funny thing is, there's no evidence to suggest that all those people thinking Sweet can't manage his own life are actually wrong.


The minimum wage mess is too convoluted to go into on a forum about internet laughingstocks, so I won't. Loling at Sweets the Tugboat Captain shittalking social welfare programs, though.


Noes, not muh lightbulbs!

Bonus hilarity: One of Sweet's fellow forumites gave him "Great Writer" award badge thingy.

Oh my god the bitchiness is ever so strong.

 

[The I Scream Man]

Lol I would just like to point out that the reason you appear to be an ingrate savage is because YOU FUCKING ARE AN INGRATE SAVAGE! Hard concept I know but in reality you contribute absolutely fucking nothing and leech everything from our great society, Jonathan M. Sweet! You are a massive hypocrite of the first order, talking about how terrible liberalism is and then feeding off the teat that liberalism and progressive ideologies gave you. Without the New Deal and the social progress you not only take for granted but in fact spit upon, you'd be much much MUCH worse off than you are now, and the fact that you don't realize it (or do and simply ignore it) is the surest sign that you're a low watt bulb.

We've spent months running intellectual circles around you, so please don't act like we don't know what the fuck we're talking about here.

 

[Ca Ira]

I have nothing against the working man, it just isn't for me. I've learned that. It's a little something called the law of diminishing returns. The more I've put into the system, the less I get out of it, and the worse my life gets. So I've simply opted out.

Has it been established what would be Sweet's eventual plan if he did get back to college? If he's opted out of having a job, does he intend to pursue a degree but not to use it to find a job, or does he just intend to stay in college forever without completing a degree?

 

[John Titor]

What is so great about incadescent light bulbs? All they do is use up more energy which increases my electricity bill.

 

[The I Scream Man]

Has it been established what would be Sweet's eventual plan if he did get back to college? If he's opted out of having a job, does he intend to pursue a degree but not to use it to find a job, or does he just intend to stay in college forever without completing a degree?

Yeah, ideally he'd like to just live like a king in the dorms forever, as completely unrealistic as that is.

 

[Ca Ira]

Yeah, ideally he'd like to just live like a king in the dorms forever, as completely unrealistic as that is.

He has expressed some frustration at not being able to get job interviews at newspapers, but I haven't seen any evidence that he resents not being permitted to actually do the work of a journalist, aside from his griping that a press badge lets you approach life like Grand Theft Auto.

 

[DrChristianTroy]

So Van Wilder but shitty at it.

 

[Ruin]

ASU must have some weirdly nice dorms if he's so desperate to get back in. At my University you're mandated to live in the dorms for one semester and most students regard them as freshman infested shitholes they can't wait to move out of.

 

[Shadow Fox]

I don't find his yearning for his college days all that strange in and of itself - I think a lot of people remember college fondly and view it as an exciting time in their lives - but it baffles me just how desperately he wants to recapture that time. Moreover, I find it really strange that he seems to view dorm life as the be-all end-all of living situations. Doesn't he want to own his own home, or at least rent? Find somewhere that he can really say is his, with a limited risk of unwanted visitors breaking things or stealing his ramens? A place where he can set his own schedule and live his own life? Maybe - if he's very lucky - a home he could eventually share with a special someone?

I mean, I enjoyed the bustle and activity and sumptuous meals of my college dorm when I was 18-19 and living in the residence halls, but as an adult I've set my sights a little higher - as I think most folks do. It's odd and fascinating and kind of sad that Sweet seems to have no such aspirations, instead setting his heart on returning to a stage of life most of us have no qualms about leaving. I think I've thrown this out before, but I really believe Sweet just wants to be supported and taken care of by other people for the rest of his life - he wants all the respect and freedom of a viable adult, but none of the responsibilities. Who else do we all know who feels this way?

 

[John Titor]

ASU must have some weirdly nice dorms if he's so desperate to get back in. At my University you're mandated to live in the dorms for one semester and most students regard them as freshman infested shitholes they can't wait to move out of.

Most likely answer: he thinks college life is like a dumb frat movie like Animal House.

 

[Henry Bemis]

Most likely answer: he thinks college life is like a dumb frat movie like Animal House.

Then he wouldn't want a dorm, then, would he?

I think Sweet's re-collegiate plans aren't really thought out too well.