🎨 Artcow Iconoclast / Jonathan Mack Sweet - The Chris-Chan of Arkansas

[The_Iconoclast]

What, did you expect them to spring riches and all you desire on you?

Uh... yeah, they kind of did. Back in my newspaperman days, when I wrote a good column, the readers showed their appreciation with gifts. The type of gift depended on the subject. For a piece in which I mentioned Marilyn Monroe, I got a couple of nudie mags, one of which has a great spread on Marilyn. I got two plastic drink bottles, the sort runners and athletes use (I was very into jogging and working out then) for one of my political pieces, I forget which. For an unpublished review of the film Barb Wire I mentioned I'd done, I got a pinup poster of its star Pamela Lee. They cut a peephole in it and put it over my room door, so when visitors came I could peer out of Pammie's left nip to see them. For my piece on using deposit bottles as currency on campus, I had pennies stuffed into the lock of my door, and I would literally have wealth showered at my feet every time I turned the key and opened it. It was glorious. The "spergs", as you call them, treated me as a god. I couldn't wait to see what the TV ratings column would get me. I sure as hell never expected termination papers.

You think it was a President that changed your luck?

Or maybe the editors just hid behind him to have an excuse. All I know is, there was a definite shift between Nov 1996 and Jan 1997. Suddenly it wasn't hip to mock Bill Clinton anymore. Of course, no one told me that.

Never mind the fact that under Bush we had a bunch of wars started under false pretense....

Yeah, well, never mind that we had the Democrat's god and savior Billy-Boy bomb an aspirin factory in Sandland, killing a night janitor, as a ploy to distract America from looking under his desk to see that pudgy beret-clad 19-year-old intern gobbling his forty-something knob. Oh, and look what they've done to her. Her life was utterly wracked by the scandal. Poor gal's forty, no employer will hire her, and no man will have her. And they're talking Hillary for Prez in 2016. You mock me for wanting to turn back the clock twenty years? Progress, my ass.

Oh yes the TV ratings bill. A bill in a totally different medium that somehow derailed your journalism career. Nothing to do with poor office politics...

That might have been a very small part of it, but I would think college-age adults could look past silly crap like offending a staff artist by acting like a star-struck fanboy or staring at some girl's neck. Obviously I was wrong.

... ripping off Saturday Night Live...

You can't steal something you never saw. I was watching Fox's Mad TV in those days. M\But then, maybe my former employers are stupid or egocentric fervently believe everyone watches the same shows they do.

....or just plain bad luck.

Well, there you get into philosophy, and that just muddies the waters. Some don't believe in luck, good or bad. I think it was a combination of jealously, over-eagerness, and an ignorance of or utter lack of proper protocol that did me in. At that point they might have leaped on any dumb thing I did to force me out. Of course, no one ever considered simply asking me to step down. No, that never occurred to reasonably well-educated college-age adults, at all.

[Y]ou and I are sadly a lot alike.... What is the ultimate difference?

Simply put, I went to a University; you didn't. If you were plunked down onto my old campus, you would probably think you were on an alien planet. The social and moral climate are very different than what you grew up with, even a mere few hundred miles away. The funny voices, the being outrageous on the editorial page, the funny little doodles of my dogs-- I thought I was winning over friends and making people happy. Perhaps I was wrong. Thanks to my time at college, I lost the ability years ago to tell the difference between cute and creepy. Not my fault. It's just how The System works.

Prove me wrong and you become uninteresting to ... the Internet.

Well, I don't want that. I conduct business online, got-dangit. I want to be noticed. Just...for the right reasons.

 

[Ruin]

Simply put, I went to a University; you didn't.

What exactly have you accomplished that gives you the right to look down on other people?

 

[atomik fyre]

Simply put, I went to a University; you didn't. If you were plunked down onto my old campus, you would probably think you were on an alien planet. The social and moral climate are very different than what you grew up with, even a mere few hundred miles away. The funny voices, the being outrageous on the editorial page, the funny little doodles of my dogs-- I thought I was winning over friends and making people happy. Perhaps I was wrong. Thanks to my time at college, I lost the ability years ago to tell the difference between cute and creepy. Not my fault. It's just how The System works.

Wait... how do you anything about me, outside of what I've said here? How do you know I didn't go to a University? How do you know I didn't spend several years visiting friends and partying at various campuses other than mine? I'll reiterate and elucidate for you, I'm not that much younger than you, in fact it is only 2 1/2 years difference if I did my math right. Backwoods state schools in the Midwest, I don't see how different the experience could be, but you know, you could be right. I do remember doing funny voices, falling laughing against cop cars, while looking for the next bar w/ an old buddy of mine one night in particular. Being outrageous and hard to pin down was kinda the rage in the late '90s for college age chaps such as us. Like I said, I think we're a lot more alike than different, that's why I personally want to see you get out of your rut and be successful.

Well, I don't want that. I conduct business online, got-dangit. I want to be noticed. Just...for the right reasons.

My fault, I should have clarified that I meant you'd no longer be noticed for being a "lol cow" by the internet at large.

Seriously, best of luck, I'm pulling for you, but I'll call you out for making excuses not to grow as an adult when I'm positive you can.

 

[Holdek]

For my piece on using deposit bottles as currency on campus, I had pennies stuffed into the lock of my door, and I would literally have wealth showered at my feet every time I turned the key and opened it.

It's almost like they were throwing pennies in front of you.

 

[Picklechu]

By 2016 we might get some real leadership in the Oval Office, and I'll be doing even better.

Or maybe the editors just hid behind him to have an excuse. All I know is, there was a definite shift between Nov 1996 and Jan 1997. Suddenly it wasn't hip to mock Bill Clinton anymore. Of course, no one told me that.


Yeah, well, never mind that we had the Democrat's god and savior Billy-Boy bomb an aspirin factory in Sandland, killing a night janitor, as a ploy to distract America from looking under his desk to see that pudgy beret-clad 19-year-old intern gobbling his forty-something knob. Oh, and look what they've done to her. Her life was utterly wracked by the scandal. Poor gal's forty, no employer will hire her, and no man will have her. And they're talking Hillary for Prez in 2016. You mock me for wanting to turn back the clock twenty years? Progress, my ass.

Simply put, I went to a University; you didn't.

So, I've mentioned this before when speaking to you, but I'll say it again before I start--I am a hardcore Republican. I spent all weekend and all day today busting my ass to help several candidates for the state legislature, and I'm going to have to wake up in about four hours to go back out and do it again as voters head to the polls. Having a Republican Senate (which I obviously hope for as well) and a Republican president will do nothing for you. You'll still live at home, whining and complaining about how "The System" is keeping you down. The truth, as has been said multiple times, is that there is no system. Bill Clinton, the kids who worked on the damn student newspaper, no one cares enough to conspire against you. Most of those people probably don't even remember you, and, if they do, you're just that bizarre weirdo who keeps sending letters to their houses.

I find it funny that you mention Monica Lewinsky. You say that a nineteen year old being involved with a forty year old is bad, yet that's exactly what you've stated that you want to do to college girls.

On that note, no college girl is going to want anything to do with you. The only time you see girls that age going for men that old is when they have either money, power, or fame--in other words, some form of success, which you lack. You are not a college kid anymore. Grow up.

Finally, you don't have a right to look down on anyone who didn't go to college. Most of them have actually done something with their lives. Before you accuse me of "being jealous" or whatever bizarre mental gymnastics you'll use to justify ignoring what I say, I have a BA and a master's degree from an objectively better university than the one you attended.

TL;DR, give up on your bizarre obsession with 1997, take some personal responsibility, and grow up.

 

[wheat pasta]

Hey, welcome back cockbag! Nobody missed you, please go away again.

Oh, and PS: You can't learn how to not be a self-righteous, pompous and unlikeable tool in a university.. that has to come from within. You're welcome.

 

[Holdek]

So, I've mentioned this before when speaking to you, but I'll say it again before I start--I am a hardcore Republican. I spent all weekend and all day today busting my ass to help several candidates for the state legislature, and I'm going to have to wake up in about four hours to go back out and do it again as voters head to the polls. Having a Republican Senate (which I obviously hope for as well) and a Republican president will do nothing for you. You'll still live at home, whining and complaining about how "The System" is keeping you down. The truth, as has been said multiple times, is that there is no system. Bill Clinton, the kids who worked on the damn student newspaper, no one cares enough to conspire against you. Most of those people probably don't even remember you, and, if they do, you're just that bizarre weirdo who keeps sending letters to their houses.

I find it funny that you mention Monica Lewinsky. You say that a nineteen year old being involved with a forty year old is bad, yet that's exactly what you've stated that you want to do to college girls.

On that note, no college girl is going to want anything to do with you. The only time you see girls that age going for men that old is when they have either money, power, or fame--in other words, some form of success, which you lack. You are not a college kid anymore. Grow up.

Finally, you don't have a right to look down on anyone who didn't go to college. Most of them have actually done something with their lives. Before you accuse me of "being jealous" or whatever bizarre mental gymnastics you'll use to justify ignoring what I say, I have a BA and a master's degree from an objectively better university than the one you attended.

TL;DR, give up on your bizarre obsession with 1997, take some personal responsibility, and grow up.

I wonder what conservatives on that "USA Patriot" board that he posts on think about him appropriating their cause for his own personal problems.

 

[RetardBus]

Welcome back my dear old friend!

It's almost like they were throwing pennies in front of you.

BELCH DIMENSION IS DEAD!

 

[DrChristianTroy]

Uh... yeah, they kind of did. Back in my newspaperman days, when I wrote a good column, the readers showed their appreciation with gifts. The type of gift depended on the subject. For a piece in which I mentioned Marilyn Monroe, I got a couple of nudie mags, one of which has a great spread on Marilyn. I got two plastic drink bottles, the sort runners and athletes use (I was very into jogging and working out then) for one of my political pieces, I forget which. For an unpublished review of the film Barb Wire I mentioned I'd done, I got a pinup poster of its star Pamela Lee. They cut a peephole in it and put it over my room door, so when visitors came I could peer out of Pammie's left nip to see them. For my piece on using deposit bottles as currency on campus, I had pennies stuffed into the lock of my door, and I would literally have wealth showered at my feet every time I turned the key and opened it. It was glorious. The "spergs", as you call them, treated me as a god. I couldn't wait to see what the TV ratings column would get me. I sure as hell never expected termination papers.

Proof? You claim all you were beloved but you have no proof. With all these gifts and your obsession with the past surely you kept them.

Or maybe the editors just hid behind him to have an excuse. All I know is, there was a definite shift between Nov 1996 and Jan 1997. Suddenly it wasn't hip to mock Bill Clinton anymore. Of course, no one told me that.

Yeah not like stand up comedians, talk show hosts, newspapers, and pretty much every comedy show made fun of him. Nope Bill Clinton was never ridiculed.

Yeah, well, never mind that we had the Democrat's god and savior Billy-Boy bomb an aspirin factory in Sandland, killing a night janitor, as a ploy to distract America from looking under his desk to see that pudgy beret-clad 19-year-old intern gobbling his forty-something knob. Oh, and look what they've done to her. Her life was utterly wracked by the scandal. Poor gal's forty, no employer will hire her, and no man will have her. And they're talking Hillary for Prez in 2016. You mock me for wanting to turn back the clock twenty years? Progress, my ass.

I love the idea of you judging anybody by there looks. Not for nothing but you're a 40 year old that looks like he's approaching 60. You're not exactly Ryan Gosling.

You can't steal something you never saw. I was watching Fox's Mad TV in those days. M\But then, maybe my former employers are stupid or egocentric fervently believe everyone watches the same shows they do.

You want to judge people's taste in things but you admit to watching Mad TV. Couldn't go for something good like Mr. Show or The State. No you watched the Big Lots version of SNL.

Well, there you get into philosophy, and that just muddies the waters. Some don't believe in luck, good or bad. I think it was a combination of jealously, over-eagerness, and an ignorance of or utter lack of proper protocol that did me in. At that point they might have leaped on any dumb thing I did to force me out. Of course, no one ever considered simply asking me to step down. No, that never occurred to reasonably well-educated college-age adults, at all.

Maybe it's that you're a pretty unlikable person who can't take criticism. Or your stalking of a fellow student. Or general unprofessional conduct. In all honesty there seem to be a variety of reasons to fire you.

 

[Mister Lister]

Her life was utterly wracked by the scandal. Poor gal's forty, no employer will hire her, and no man will have her..

If you call earning millions of dollars, making TV appearances, writing magazine articles, starting up her own business, becoming a TV presenter, taking advertising and book deals, moving to London and earning a Master degree in psychology 'utterly wracked' then sign me up to suck some presidential dick.

So what if she never held a full time job or got married. Did she sit back, wallowing in self pity, and blame the world around her for everything wrong with her life? No. She took control, worked through the problems thrown at her with hard work and determination, and ultimately made her life better.

You can blame whoever you want for your problems, but you're still to blame for not fixing any of them.

 

[John Titor]

Simply put, I went to a University; you didn't. If you were plunked down onto my old campus, you would probably think you were on an alien planet. The social and moral climate are very different than what you grew up with, even a mere few hundred miles away. The funny voices, the being outrageous on the editorial page, the funny little doodles of my dogs-- I thought I was winning over friends and making people happy. Perhaps I was wrong. Thanks to my time at college, I lost the ability years ago to tell the difference between cute and creepy. Not my fault. It's just how The System works.

Your University must have some seriously low standards. For the record, college life isn't some dumbass frat movie so don't go telling us what college is like.

You want to judge people's taste in things but you admit to watching Mad TV. Couldn't go for something good like Mr. Show or The State. No you watched the Big Lots version of SNL.
.

Hey....

 

[Shokew]

Hey, Iconoclast,

If you're looking for politicians who ONLY CARE ABOUT THEMSELVES to help you with your nonsensical and immature plight, you got another thing coming.

 

[The I Scream Man]

Okay, if you insist. But you must admit, saying I don't love my mother is just wrong. I don't think she always knows what she's doing, however. I had the two shops that she recommended I go work for fold out right under me, and a relationship with a girl-- the niece of the same friend who had the doll shop, in fact -- that she introduced me to (apparently to distract me from trying to reconcile with my ex) didn't last either.

Awwwww Sweetness I'm disappointed! I was expecting you to really let me have it, and instead this is the best you could do? I think I'm hurt! Well, I'm a charitable guy so lets go through this post of yours some more, shall we?

Firstly, no I don't think saying you don't love your mother is wrong. Because I don't think you do. See, I love mine, and she loves me. How do I know she loves me? Oh thats easy, she tells me when I'm fucking up and doesn't mince words or sugarcoat it. Sort of like your mother has done, according to you. But here's the cherry on the sundae: how does my mom know that I love her? Oh man that's another easy one: because I listen to her and I take her advice, and I fix my life because I know it makes her happy to see me succeed. Which I am doing quite well, if you must know.

As far as your other comments are concerned (because lets be honest, we can hardly call them points, now can we?), the fact that two businesses out of millions in the nation and billions in the world went out of business has nothing to do with her recommendation of them, right? And the fact that she introduced you to someone, probably because she saw you were lonely and wanted you to be happy, because she loves you, well you can't really equivocate between those two either, can you?

Haha, I mean, if you blamed your mom for things that were patently outside of her control, things that happened in your life, the life that she isn't living, well that would mean you were willing to throw your own goddamn mother under the bus just so that you could say you weren't at fault. And you wonder why you make us all sick. Jesus Christ man you're a mess.

I tried that twice. And even if I was doing well for myself, my ex-partner is still out there, probably tricking some poor naive kid into being his new shop assistant, stinking up their life. I couldn't live with that guilt. I want his new shop to fold. If I sound heartless, I'm sorry, but if his leg rotted off from leprosy, I wouldn't give two frigs. I got sick and started losing my voice because he was a coward, leaving me out there running around under that blazing sun all summer instead of sitting in a nice air-conditioned store, trying to make up all the commissions I lost on his account. I've considered posting negative reviews of his shop on every website available. First, however, I will try to get in touch with him and hear his side of the story. Who knows, maybe I wasn't a peach to work with either.

Mmmm here's another quality Sweetness paragraph, really I have absolutely no idea why you're getting zero mileage out of your English degree! I mean, aside from the obvious reasons of laziness, very deep insecurities, and inhuman narcissism. But aside from those, I mean how on Earth are you not gainfully employed right now???

As far as your ex-partner is concerned, well I don't really think its any of your business what he does right now. This petty grudge you're holding is just that: small and short-sighted. Oh no, not getting sick and losing your voice from the hot hot sun! Not working for a living and trying to make your customers happy! Man I am just floored that you don't have a huge crowd of people backing you up and taking your side in this.

And, haha, maybe you weren't a peach to work with? Sweetness you're not a peach of any kind. I can hardly stand to think of you or read your bloated, pedantic, shallow nonsense here in my beloved Kiwi Farm. If it wasn't my responsibility to beat you over the head with logic and reason until you saw the light or left the internet forever, why, I'd be physically sick thinking of it. 39 years old and no ambition beyond the very obviously unattainable...I don't know how you can stand it yourself. It just shows me and the world at large an appalling lack of self-respect, to allow yourself to stagnate and remain static like this, in THIS, one of the best countries in the world in regards to dynamism and reinventing oneself.

See, I knew someone would eventually ask that. Simple answer: addicts and alcoholics do that to themselves. Eventually the addiction takes over and becomes unbearable, and they have a choice: get help or die. People are willing to help those who genuinely want help. They build homes and centers expressly for that purpose. What happened to me was perpetrated by other people, for whatever sick reasons they had--greed, jealousy, revenge, or just plain meanness. I have no one to help me. There is no facility where I can go to spend six months or a year living like a college student, healing, recovering, growing stronger in mind and body, maybe having a little fun now and again. Still, I think contacting my old "friends" to hear their side of the story is a step in the right direction.

This is my favorite part of the whole post Sweetness. I really love this little section right here. The above-quoted part.

Do you know why I love this part the most? Why it warms my cold, cold heart, here in my frozen bunker of lulz?

Because you are so close to understanding why you're a giant failure, and you just won't put 1 and 1 together to make 2.

Everything that's happened here is something you did to yourself. All these people would have to care about you to act against you out of greed or jealousy or revenge or even meanness. In order for those motives to be valid, they'd have to perceive you as having something of value to them, something they wanted and were willing to violate moral and ethical standards to take. Too bad you've never had anything like that, and never will with this attitude you possess.

People who have much less than you do are able to "spend six months to a year healing, recovering, growing stronger in mind and body, maybe having a little fun now and again". Why do you think that is? I want your answer single-spaced, at least 300 words, on my desk Wednesday morning. Your grades aren't very good, Mr. Sweet. I suggest you improve if you want to remain in this course.

BONUS ROUND:

Oh, yes, coworkers who resent me, a boss whose attitude towards me was that she needs another columnist as much as they need another light table in the office, and a mental midget of a partner who insults me every time he can't have his way or threatens to cut me out of the business whenever I second-guess him one too many times looks so good on a resume.

Haha, Sweetness, really you have no business calling anyone a "mental midget" in comparison to yourself. I'm running rings around you right now, while doing three other things simultaneously, and I'm not even breaking a sweat. Definitely a case of the pot calling the kettle black here, as you're not exactly MENSA material.

Simply put, I went to a University; you didn't. If you were plunked down onto my old campus, you would probably think you were on an alien planet. The social and moral climate are very different than what you grew up with, even a mere few hundred miles away. The funny voices, the being outrageous on the editorial page, the funny little doodles of my dogs-- I thought I was winning over friends and making people happy. Perhaps I was wrong. Thanks to my time at college, I lost the ability years ago to tell the difference between cute and creepy. Not my fault. It's just how The System works.

Speaking as someone who also went to a "University", you obviously were the alien here, not anyone else. I find it interesting how you admit that you lost the ability to discern what is and is not socially acceptable, and yet its the fault of some nebulous, ill-defined conspiracy instead. If you were a rational person I'd remind you that that hypothesis makes zero sense and doesn't stand up to any sort of analysis, but you're not rational and are in fact quite mad.

COMBO BREAKER!!!!!:

Well, I don't want that. I conduct business online, got-dangit. I want to be noticed. Just...for the right reasons.

AND Here we have it! The heart of your problems! The root cause of all your angst. You want to be noticed! You want to accepted and you want people to say "there goes a Paragon of Humanity, a real champion of industry!" You find it inconceivable that people don't all know your name and love every word you say, adhering to it as the gospel it so obviously is!
The problem here is that you are no one and deserve nothing. There are no right reasons. I said earlier that you are a grown-up Jay Geis, and the comparisons are getting more and more creepy and surreal as time goes on, because he believes the exact same things, and he has said them in almost the exact same ways. God help you, man. You're deranged.

 

[ToroidalBoat]

Apologies if this has already been discussed in the past 39 pages, but if I'm getting this right:

>be in college
>be on school paper
>write article on X
>get accused of plagiarism
>get b&
>X is to blame (at least partly) for current woes

 

[autism420]

Oh boy, water bottles and pennies. Sounds like you had a bunch of dedicated fans.

 

[Mister Lister]

Oh boy, water bottles and pennies. Sounds like you had a bunch of dedicated fans.

I love the fact he doesn't even realise that getting your locker filled with pennies is probably either a prank on the weird kid or someone making fun of the kid with no money.

I also love how he describes it a being "showered with wealth". Even if they filled his locker up with hundreds of the things it would still amount to a few bucks.

They must have laughed so hard at how happy he looked scrabbling to pick them all up.

 

[WWWWolf]

Ooh, I know that if I go away from the forums for a few days something interesting happens. My typical luck.

Why should I? It's The System's fault, after all.

Hi! Since you last were here, I've just gosh-darn gone and done resumed my studies in the local unversity. I can say you were one of my inspirations! Oh, and it's all thanks to the System, they're actually very supportive of my attitude and efforts to improve myself. ☭ PRAISE THE GLORIOUS EUROPEAN SOCIALISM ☭ Also the counselor kicked ass. Made sense of the state of my studies much better than I ever could. Wish this place would stop using trendy, ever-changing course titles. But that's information technology for you. Bloody marketers.

Pays to be positive, not grumpy!

Really...why all the immature bullcrap like this, and this, directed at me? Why do you care? Are my books and comics really hurting you, or taking anything away from you? Hm?

I'm not involved with the BWW reviews, though I did write one review elsewhere about your other work earlier, so perhaps I can try to shed light on a few things you totally missed. The purpose of literary critique isn't to attack the author. As a writer, it's my job to learn from the good and bad things people point out about my work. As a critic, it's my job to educate public, possibly help people who are interested in learning to write, and most importantly give valuable feedback to the authors. You said it hurts your bottom line, which may be the immediate result, but really, it's meant to even further improve your bottom line. Simply put, you may not be selling the crappy books, but you'll learn how to write better books which the public is actually willing to buy. The life of an artist is about continuous improvement, and you can't just lie down and wallow in your pity about the inevitable mistakes you make. They are inevitable because you are only a human. Learn from them and be better in the future.

 

[DrChristianTroy]

Awwwww Sweetness I'm disappointed! I was expecting you to really let me have it, and instead this is the best you could do? I think I'm hurt! Well, I'm a charitable guy so lets go through this post of yours some more, shall we?

Firstly, no I don't think saying you don't love your mother is wrong. Because I don't think you do. See, I love mine, and she loves me. How do I know she loves me? Oh thats easy, she tells me when I'm fucking up and doesn't mince words or sugarcoat it. Sort of like your mother has done, according to you. But here's the cherry on the sundae: how does my mom know that I love her? Oh man that's another easy one: because I listen to her and I take her advice, and I fix my life because I know it makes her happy to see me succeed. Which I am doing quite well, if you must know.

As far as your other comments are concerned (because lets be honest, we can hardly call them points, now can we?), the fact that two businesses out of millions in the nation and billions in the world went out of business has nothing to do with her recommendation of them, right? And the fact that she introduced you to someone, probably because she saw you were lonely and wanted you to be happy, because she loves you, well you can't really equivocate between those two either, can you?

Haha, I mean, if you blamed your mom for things that were patently outside of her control, things that happened in your life, the life that she isn't living, well that would mean you were willing to throw your own goddamn mother under the bus just so that you could say you weren't at fault. And you wonder why you make us all sick. Jesus Christ man you're a mess.



Mmmm here's another quality Sweetness paragraph, really I have absolutely no idea why you're getting zero mileage out of your English degree! I mean, aside from the obvious reasons of laziness, very deep insecurities, and inhuman narcissism. But aside from those, I mean how on Earth are you not gainfully employed right now???

As far as your ex-partner is concerned, well I don't really think its any of your business what he does right now. This petty grudge you're holding is just that: small and short-sighted. Oh no, not getting sick and losing your voice from the hot hot sun! Not working for a living and trying to make your customers happy! Man I am just floored that you don't have a huge crowd of people backing you up and taking your side in this.

And, haha, maybe you weren't a peach to work with? Sweetness you're not a peach of any kind. I can hardly stand to think of you or read your bloated, pedantic, shallow nonsense here in my beloved Kiwi Farm. If it wasn't my responsibility to beat you over the head with logic and reason until you saw the light or left the internet forever, why, I'd be physically sick thinking of it. 39 years old and no ambition beyond the very obviously unattainable...I don't know how you can stand it yourself. It just shows me and the world at large an appalling lack of self-respect, to allow yourself to stagnate and remain static like this, in THIS, one of the best countries in the world in regards to dynamism and reinventing oneself.



This is my favorite part of the whole post Sweetness. I really love this little section right here. The above-quoted part.

Do you know why I love this part the most? Why it warms my cold, cold heart, here in my frozen bunker of lulz?

Because you are so close to understanding why you're a giant failure, and you just won't put 1 and 1 together to make 2.

Everything that's happened here is something you did to yourself. All these people would have to care about you to act against you out of greed or jealousy or revenge or even meanness. In order for those motives to be valid, they'd have to perceive you as having something of value to them, something they wanted and were willing to violate moral and ethical standards to take. Too bad you've never had anything like that, and never will with this attitude you possess.

People who have much less than you do are able to "spend six months to a year healing, recovering, growing stronger in mind and body, maybe having a little fun now and again". Why do you think that is? I want your answer single-spaced, at least 300 words, on my desk Wednesday morning. Your grades aren't very good, Mr. Sweet. I suggest you improve if you want to remain in this course.

BONUS ROUND:

Haha, Sweetness, really you have no business calling anyone a "mental midget" in comparison to yourself. I'm running rings around you right now, while doing three other things simultaneously, and I'm not even breaking a sweat. Definitely a case of the pot calling the kettle black here, as you're not exactly MENSA material.

Speaking as someone who also went to a "University", you obviously were the alien here, not anyone else. I find it interesting how you admit that you lost the ability to discern what is and is not socially acceptable, and yet its the fault of some nebulous, ill-defined conspiracy instead. If you were a rational person I'd remind you that that hypothesis makes zero sense and doesn't stand up to any sort of analysis, but you're not rational and are in fact quite mad.

COMBO BREAKER!!!!!:

AND Here we have it! The heart of your problems! The root cause of all your angst. You want to be noticed! You want to accepted and you want people to say "there goes a Paragon of Humanity, a real champion of industry!" You find it inconceivable that people don't all know your name and love every word you say, adhering to it as the gospel it so obviously is!
The problem here is that you are no one and deserve nothing. There are no right reasons. I said earlier that you are a grown-up Jay Geis, and the comparisons are getting more and more creepy and surreal as time goes on, because he believes the exact same things, and he has said them in almost the exact same ways. God help you, man. You're deranged.

 

[Randall Fragg]

@The_Iconoclast, what is with your obsession with "Progressives"? Quick question, have you ever heard of the gilded age?

 

[Shadow Fox]

sums up this entire thread. Or @The_Iconoclast in general.