🎨 Artcow Iconoclast / Jonathan Mack Sweet - The Chris-Chan of Arkansas

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DrJonesHat said:
The sad thing is we would never know. He has no friends, his family cannot stand him and would probably not take him in, and since he's awful at figuring things out for himself, it would probably never occur to him to go to the library and use their internet. I know he lives in rural Arkansas, but even small-town libraries try to have internet these days.
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Shit man, most McDonald's, even in bumblefuck have free Internet these days. Trouble is, I doubt anyone told him how to connect to wifi.
 
I can sort of see he would be proud of his attempt at taxidermy - it's not much different in quality to his comics, but it shows us that he messed around and tried stuff out.

The only problem is taxidermy doesn't age very well without constant maintenance or preparation, and a dissection patient isn't a very good choice for taxidermy in the first place (not that the alternatives are any better from a ethical point of view either).
 
Holdek said:
http://haggismccrablice.deviantart.com/art/Smoking-Cat-Productions-Logo-v-3-671767247

New post where he talks about putting a dead animal carcass on his old computer. :\

Unknown if the computer breaking event and this creepy news are related.
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Geeeeeesh.

But, wait -

"We dissected cats in zoology lab back in my junior year of high school. Inspired by my teacher, who kept one of these macabre little souvenirs up on the classroom wall, I, once the cutting, labeling, and studying of its parts was done, took my cat's skin and head home as a prize. You might remember seeing it in the background of my shot of the "Star of Armorel". I stuffed the head-skin with straw rolled up in a paper towel and inserted two clear marbles for eyes."

Oooh, I get it! He just described the birth of "Ashleigh."
 
TheUltimatePickle said:
That's really fucking creepy man. What kind of fucked up serial killer school has kids dissect cats? I don't really wanna think about the other possibilities....
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I know most high schools have students dissect frogs. Mine had the advanced classes dissect pigs in addition. But the supply origin for frogs and pigs are pretty established. Where the hell are they getting cats? Various strays taken to the animal pound?
 
Holdek said:
I know most high schools have students dissect frogs. Mine had the advanced classes dissect pigs in addition. But the supply origin for frogs and pigs are pretty established. Where the hell are they getting cats? Various strays taken to the animal pound?
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Yeah, I remember that, we dissected frogs and a crayfish and a worm and some other stuff. I definitely have never heard of any school dissecting cats.

I'm wondering if that story is a lie and he just cut up a random dead cat he found while looking for cans....
 
Actually, in Sweet's defense (holy shit that's something I'd never expected to write) my HS physiology class had us dissect cats too. And I actually live in a small city (~100k+ population), not the middle of nowhere. It's certainly a weird choice of animal, and one I wasn't particularly happy with, but it DOES happen.
 
Good lord.

Live worms, dead squid, and dead frogs here (the latter were freeze-dried. It was a heck of a lot of fun trying to cut open the carcass of a freeze-dried animal with blunt scalpels). @The Mountain raises a good point; the types of animals dissected across the country could vary, but the thing of it is ultimately this: Jon autistically curated a cat skull and fur, and then used them as decorations.

Let's put that in perspective, shall we?

Did Jon replace the window that his brother broke? No.

Did he do anything to stop the flow of rain water from damaging his wall? No.

Did Jon fix his wall when the rain inevitably damaged it? No.

Did Jon learn new ways to save files from his computer that didn't involve using a dying, antiquated desktop? Not until getting a new laptop, which he couldn't have bought for himself.

Did Jon take care to maintain, as best as his addled brain could manage, a cat skull from his high school years?

Yes.

Once again, we see where his priorities lie. And, as if there's some cosmic law that demands it, those priorities must be unswervingly disturbing.
 
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He Sets Me On Fire said:
Good lord.

Live worms, dead squid, and dead frogs here (the latter were freeze-dried. It was a heck of a lot of fun trying to cut open the carcass of a freeze-dried animals with blunt scalpels). @The Mountain raises a good point; the types of animals dissected across the country could vary, but the thing of it is ultimately this: Jon autistically curated a cat skull and fur, and then used them as decorations.

Let's put that in perspective, shall we?

Did Jon replace the window that his brother broke? No.

Did he do anything to stop the flow of rain water from damaging his wall? No.

Did Jon fix his wall when the rain inevitably damaged it? No.

Did Jon learn new ways to save files from his computer that didn't involve using a dying, antiquated desktop? Not until getting a new laptop, which he couldn't have bought for himself.

Did Jon take care to maintain, as best as his addled brain could manage, a cat skull from his high school years?

Yes.

Once again, we see where his priorities lie. And, as if there's some cosmic law that demands it, those priorities must be unswervingly disturbing.
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Actually, he gave up on it too; after reading his serial-killer style ramblings, notice that he only recently found it while rummaging through the closet after like a decade or so of it mouldering there. He also tried to rationalize why anyone would want a bubble monitor because he's an idiot who can't understand why those went obsolete.
 
Adamska said:
Actually, he gave up on it too; after reading his serial-killer style ramblings, notice that he only recently found it while rummaging through the closet after like a decade or so of it mouldering there. He also tried to rationalize why anyone would want a bubble monitor because he's an idiot who can't understand why those went obsolete.
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The idea of just tossing a dead cat into a junk closet is... very unnerving.
 
He Sets Me On Fire said:
Did Jon take care to maintain, as best as his addled brain could manage, a cat skull from his high school years?

Yes.

Once again, we see where his priorities lie. And, as if there's some cosmic law that demands it, those priorities must be unswervingly disturbing.
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We need to be clear on this. The Stalking Horror didn't take home a cat skull, odd as that would be since he has no understanding of -- or real interest in -- science. No, he took home the skin from the head of a dissected cat and stuffed it full of rags and kept it as a trophy. In college I knew a couple of zoology majors who had two or three cleaned animal skulls on their bookshelves. And some of the profs had quite a few of them in their offices. But I have never known anyone who cut the skin off of a cat's head, took it home, stuffed it with rags or old newspapers and stuck a couple of marbles into the monstrosity as eyes. (It's also interesting that the Bad Boy of College Journalism describes the marbles as "clear" in one sentence and as "translucent" in another. One day, The Giant Brain of Blytheville will take a huge step forward and become semi-literate.)

If the cat's head had been large enough, does anyone doubt that Sweet would be wearing the skin as a mask? (I'll put the odds at ten to one that he actually tried this before stuffing the head with some of his soiled bikini underwear.)

At the end of his unfortunate and, as usual, unintentionally revealing journal entry, Sweet muses about having the head dry-cleaned. He writes: " Hello, I've got a couple of dead cat skins here, and was wondering how you get cobwebs and dirt out of a fur-- h'llo?" Here he claims to have "a couple of dead cat skins." I wonder where the other one came from. (And let's not forget that the use of the phrase "a couple of" to mean "several" has been in standard usage for centuries and is especially common in the South. Just how large is this collection dead cat heads?)
 
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Dr. Merkwurdichliebe said:
We need to be clear on this. The Stalking Horror didn't take home a cat skull, odd as that would be since he has no understanding of -- or real interest in -- science. No, he took home the skin from the head of a dissected cat and stuffed in full of rags and kept it as a trophy.
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Cripes, you're right, I missed that. Can ... can you imagine what that abomination must look like? Something once alive and vital, now misshapen and twisted into some hideously mocking approximation of what it used to be by a demented babyman who can hardly get stick figures right. At least Ed Gein knew how to sew.
 
Adamska said:
Actually, he gave up on it too; after reading his serial-killer style ramblings, notice that he only recently found it while rummaging through the closet after like a decade or so of it mouldering there. He also tried to rationalize why anyone would want a bubble monitor because he's an idiot who can't understand why those went obsolete.
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"They're good for display, better than a shelf even!" - Jon

He's trying way too hard to defend his crappy computer.
 
Lefty's Revenge said:
Why do all of these lolcows end in soul-crushing madness?
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Because a lot of people who are pathetic enough to get a thread here are soul-crushingly mad.

People constantly joke about "autism" here and then are surprised when the lolcows turn out to be literally exceptional or insane.
 
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