🎨 Artcow Iconoclast / Jonathan Mack Sweet - The Chris-Chan of Arkansas

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What the hell kind of layout is this? Aspiring comic artist, everyone.
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Not to mention:

√ Draws little black girl as monstrous racists stereotype who appears to have mange.

√ Self-insert spergs about the main benefit of HDTVs being the ability to count all the freckles on the boobs of a former child actress.

√ Demonstrates an imbecile's command of common hyphenation rules: cho-colate, ne-ver, freck-le and on-ly jump out immediately.

Unable to resist making utterly witless pornographic allusion to name of a children's toy.

Includes photograph of black people shopping at Wal-Mart. Too stupid to realize that he can't use such images in his for-profit publications without the subjects' consent, permission that black people are unlikely to grant to the owner of Ku Klux Komics.

√ As usual, can't keep text inside balloons and can't prevent random words from appearing in boldface.

Quite a list of accomplishments for one spread.
 
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My character is sixteen, not 10. You'd know that if you read his bio...

We don't have any reason to read your character's bio. Everything else you've cranked out is derivative garbage, no reason to believe the background of your character is any different.

but I guess either no one told Ruin and "Greer" about it, or he can't see to read too well. After all, I've read that pigs have notoriously poor eyesight.

That would explain your need for glasses, Jon.

Funny how this porcine fool only makes sense when he's trying to mock me.

Lesson learned, folks: Thumbskull can't understand well-written sarcasm. Oh, also, Jon, a doughy ape such as yourself has no place calling someone else porcine.

One of Merwurdichliebe's usual blatant, nonsensical, and wholly unfounded claims was recently called into question by a fellow poster, who I imagine is being taken to the woodshed and up for a suspension as we speak.

Uh, no, Thumbles. Just, no. You're wrong, and we'll leave it at that.

What can I say, it's my signature style-- text slightly overlapping the confines of the box. Give it time. In another fifteen to 20 years, every other comic-book letterer will be mimicking my design.

Incompetence and poor motor skills are not a style, Jon. You screwed up the caption and the lettering, full stop. No one's going to be mimicking anything you do, because good artists strive for perfection; they don't try to hide their shoddy work behind some lie about "style." Christian Chandler makes the same kind of poor excuses as well.

Besides that, the only people who read your trash do so in order to mock it. Nobody takes you seriously.

I'm a visionary.

You misspelled "ugly, incompetent perv who doesn't have the brains to figure out a photocopier." You're welcome.

Leastways, I was, 'til those small-minded imbeciles at A-State exiled me to this technological backwater with no money, and all my old friends from The Herald turned their backs on me.

HAIL ASU! HAIL THE STAFF OF THE HERALD! HAIL DR. LEO GREER!
 
but I guess either no one told Ruin and "Greer" about it, or he can't see to read too well. After all, I've read that pigs have notoriously poor eyesight.

That would explain your need for glasses, Jon.

Funny how this porcine fool only makes sense when he's trying to mock me.

Lesson learned, folks: Thumbskull can't understand well-written sarcasm. Oh, also, Jon, a doughy ape such as yourself has no place calling someone else porcine.

One of Merwurdichliebe's usual blatant, nonsensical, and wholly unfounded claims was recently called into question by a fellow poster, who I imagine is being taken to the woodshed and up for a suspension as we speak.

Uh, no, Thumbles. Just, no. You're wrong, and we'll leave it at that.

Why is he calling me porcine? I'm six feet tall and weigh 180 pounds. And my vision is excellent.

Why does he think that pigs are supposed to have the same vision as humans? Pigs have exceptional vision for the environments in which they thrive in the wild. Their field of vision, for example, is more than 300 degrees, almost twice that of humans. If The Stalking Horror wanted to compare me to an animal with poor vision, he should have called me a rhinoceros.

Am I merely trying to mock Sweet? Based on his responses, I was almost certain that I was succeeding.

Finally, HSMOF, because you are a moderator and since my pal @ToroidalBoat has a hypothesis that differs from mine on one very minor point involving The Giant Brain of Blytheville's thousands of offenses against art, culture, civilization and the very concept of simple human decency, would you please take TB to the woodshed . . . and congratulate him on further befuddling The Farting Eejit's mentally defective ideas about the Kiwi hive mind and the fact that intelligent people can, when presented with a limited set of facts, arrive at different -- but nonetheless logical -- conclusions? Thank you.
 
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I've actually shown Jon's work to several published artists (comics and animation). They get a chuckle out of how incompetent it is. One compared him to Jimmy Wichard and the outsider art episode of King of the Hill.

Jon doesn't understand that normal people can have a disagreement without being assholes. I've had disagreeements with posters and mods here, but because we don't act like pooflinging chimps like Jon, we discuss these issues like civilized people.
 
Finally, HSMOF, because you are a moderator and since my pal @ToroidalBoat has a hypothesis that differs from mine on one very minor point involving The Giant Brain of Blytheville's thousands of offenses against art, culture, civilization and the very concept of simple human decency, would you please take TB to the woodshed . . . and congratulate him on further befuddling The Farting Eejit's mentally defective ideas about the Kiwi hive mind and the fact that intelligent people can, when presented with a limited set of facts, arrive at different -- but nonetheless logical -- conclusions? Thank you.

Wha..? Bu..! You're asking me this now? It's too late now! Why did you wait so long! Look, timing is critical when an slight disagreement arises between posters! I've already taken TB to the woodshed, deleted his account, erased all of his posts, drained his bank account, and sat him on a Judas cradle (in honor of Jon and his love of pyramids and anuses). I mean, geeze, come on! I go to all that effort to put together a rat mask to fit over his head, and now you're telling me that minor quibbles that aren't even significant enough to be labelled quibbles don't send the party into a traitor-hunting frenzy? What am I supposed to do with all of those rats now?

Actually, you know what? Since Jon has demonstrated that he doesn't have the brainpower to suss out sarcasm from sincerity, I will now drop the snark and offer kudos to both TB and you for showing us just how hopelessly incompetent Jon actually is. Like I said before, he's a pile of cartilidge and self-destruction. The more he messes with us, the more we mess with his mind, which you two have successfully done. Nice!
 
Christ, he's still blame shifting his shitty art.
>>Oh man, your lack of formal training really does show.
And who's to blame for that? Oh, yeah, Leo Greer. If that fat little fuck-- who, as I recall, was hardly the six-foot-tall giant he paints himself as, having to stand on his cloven little trotters to crack five-five, and who donned a purple track suit before our last meeting that, with his physique, made him resemble a plump ripe grape-- hadn't frozen my records, I might have actually been able to enroll in some art classes in grad school. But noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo. I was ousted from the A-State community as part of a scheme to derail what Murky's sources call my "perpetual college student plan" -- which, again, was their fault. Hell, I only stuck around in hopes of getting more goodies, which they were dishing out to begin with as part of a convoluted plot to punish me for a crime I didn't committed and never understood. If they had just been honest and up front with me, I'd have left, disgusted, of my own accord.

By the way, the egotistical little gnome didn't even name the right poster in his last ignorant diatribe against me. T.B. wasn't the one who questioned him. Go back and read that page again, Murky. As I said, potbellied pigs and their eyesight-- poor.

The things I was saying and opinions I espoused boldly -- and was punished for-- 20 years ago have only started to be whispered by a few in the mainstream media. I was far ahead of the curve. They were short-sighted and wrong to get rid of me.
Isn't there an animal analogy that perfectly describes him?
 
My 5-year-old cousin whines less than Sweets. Christ almighty, just shut your mouth.
 
Deranged Dumbass said:
By the way, the egotistical little gnome didn't even name the right poster in his last ignorant diatribe against me. T.B. wasn't the one who questioned him. Go back and read that page again, Murky. As I said, potbellied pigs and their eyesight-- poor.

Sweets is likely referring to @John Titor here. Back on page 411, the good doc stated that Sweet said on his blog that he believed the Black in Black Friday was meant to reference black people shoplifting on that day. John Titor disagreed with the doc and felt that Sweet did not say such a thing on his blog.

Well, I'm sorry John Titor, but we're going have to take you up to the woodshed now. You knew the consequences of going against the agenda. At the shed, you will be beaten with lead pipes, then your bloody body will be dragged around the woodshed by truck, and finally you will be decapitated by 8 inch bone knife Look, I'm not happy we have to do this, but we cannot have people questioning the Kiwi Propaganda Minister, @Dr. Merkwurdichliebe.

Seriously though, Jon continues to prove just how deficient his brain is by the fact he cannot discern that the Farms is not one giant hivemind. Sweet says we're interchangeable, but I think it's really hard for him to tell the difference between other people.

Only a tiny fracture of the entire Kiwi Farms member base contribute to this thread on a regular basis. There are plenty of Kiwis who have probably never viewed this thread. Not only that, but even in this thread itself, you see how people treat and react to Jon Sweet differently. Kiwis such as @HSMOF and the doc have absolutely no respect or sympathy for him and constantly wreck his shit with their posts. On the other hand, you have Kiwis who like to go easy on Jon. @Holdek openly admitted that he's pretty soft on him. John Titor is also one of the Kiwis that likes to be soft on him for the most part. Not all Kiwis need to sodomize Sweetness through text like some do. Sweet, we're not the borg despite that being the only way your brain can comprehend us.

Also I love how he makes it so we have to figure out which member he is referring to. Sweet is so desperate for some sense of power that he will "toy" with us by withholding dumb info while turning around and powerleveling major details about his private life.

As for that disagreement between the doc and John Titor, I can see where they're both coming from. John Titor has a point when he says Sweet did not claim that he believes Black Friday was named after blacks shoplifting on that day. Sweet did not directly state that. On the other hand, the doc has a point because Sweet says Black Friday sounds like a name "an anonymous police officer came up with". Why would Sweet think the name was thought up by a police officer? It heavily implies he believes police officers everywhere must commonly deal with black shoplifters on that day.

Anyway, big whoop, somebody disagreed with what Dr. Merk said. Who cares? It's like it's impossible for Sweet to fathom that people can have minor disagreements without getting violent or hostile with each other. Also, it's so cute how he still believes Dr. Merk is "Leo Greer". You truly live up to your lolcow status Thumbles.
 
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Not only is he pasting "Leo Greer" over Dr. Merk's avatar in MS-Paint, but he added someone else over HSMOF. I think one of the other students at the newspaper?

Yeah, I believe that's supposed to be one of the editors. If so, this person would've gone on to become employed at a successful newspaper. So, in effect, Jon is replacing my avatar with an image of someone who beat him. Funny, that!
 
Sweets is likely referring to @John Titor here. Back on page 411, the good doc stated that Sweet said on his blog that he believed the Black in Black Friday was meant to reference black people shoplifting on that day. John Titor disagreed with the doc and felt that Sweet did not say such a thing on his blog.

Well, I'm sorry John Titor, but we're going have to take you up to the woodshed now. You knew the consequences of going against the agenda. At the shed, you will be beaten with lead pipes, then your bloody body will be dragged around the woodshed by truck, and finally you will be decapitated by 8 inch bone knife Look, I'm not happy we have to do this, but we cannot have people questioning the Kiwi Propaganda Minister, @Dr. Merkwurdichliebe.
NOOOOOO! Do it to Julia! Do it to Julaaaayyaa!! I love Big Progress! :'(

Okay, for real now. I knew he was exceptional but I really want to know how his brain works since my post was in no way supportive of him. If he wasn't such a pussy and logged back on here, he could see that I rated agree to Merk's post about him no longer deserving benefits of doubt.
 
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Just to further drive it home how old Sweetums looks for his age, here is 42-year-old Takahiro Sakurai:
0f5425869b6b7c8ed7b0ea585cc96e811459725826_full.jpg

Here is 41-year-old Hiroshi Kamiya:
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And here is 41-year-old Jonathan Mack Sweet:
sweetchuck__s_scrapbook_by_haggismccrablice-daqdffc.jpg
 
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