How the fuck do I write a resume?

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rel=alternate said:
Honestly, that's not even the worst profile. It shows loyalty and somewhat competency.

The worst profile is people who think they need to show every job on their resume, and you notice how much they move around. In the EU, that's typically following the pattern of the minimum length of a contract.

I will absolutely have questions about someone with patches in their resume. But if you literally never got renewed anywhere you worked at, I know you're a liability for sure. No matter what you say or your experience.

In some cases, it might be better to show less experience.
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Well that was sort of my point, I have gotten a lot of jobs through "Wow you did THAT for 10 years? Well you probably won't quit the first time this job really sucks."

Sometimes people focus too much on patches I think, I still get asked about what I did Januart to July 2002, and "backpacking in Asia" sounds worse now that I'm middle aged than when I was a young man.
 
Apustajan apustaja said:
Well that was sort of my point, I have gotten a lot of jobs through "Wow you did THAT for 10 years? Well you probably won't quit the first time this job really sucks."

Sometimes people focus too much on patches I think, I still get asked about what I did Januart to July 2002, and "backpacking in Asia" sounds worse now that I'm middle aged than when I was a young man.
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100% agree. People who have showed resilience or loyalty in past positions make a good impression. The hiring process is expensive and frustrating, nobody wants to find themselves back at the same point in 6 months.

I ask about patches when it really stands out, and it's often the kind of answer I get. And I don't think about it for another second after this. Unless I am somehow legitimately interested.

Nobody is out to get you, if you have a reasonable answer, it becomes a footnote in the interview. Even if it's a lie and you were dicking around at home playing video games, nobody will check.
 
73_Autistic_Fuck_54 said:
I did custodial work for around 7 years, it's the only job I've had, (I'm still in my 20s)
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Well that is a good thing. You took care of things and was committed to it.
The answer to the question "where do you see yourself in five years" can be "doing this job really well and liking it", and there is no shame in that.
And custodial work is important. The first person many companies would notice is gone is the cleaner/janitor.
 
Fuck that resume shit. Figure out where you want to work, walk in and ask to speak to the boss or hiring manager, introduce yourself with a firm handshake and tell them you can start Monday.
 
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