3. Appreciate the horrified looks on the faces of your family who haven't seen you in months, and will no doubt dread the next holiday that they have to see you at.
All of you fucking degenerates who like runny yolk need a gas chamber immediately. Hard yolk or no yolk.
But yes, I do like my eggs scrambled with onions, green peppers, garlic powder, onion powder, salt, pepper, basil, and crushed red pepper. Indeed, I am a chef.