How do I tie my shoes?

[The News Crews]

All these years I’ve just superglued the strings to the top of the shoe

 

[Soup Sammiches]

Velcro nigga. Learning is for fags.

 

[PositiveMonk]

You make a loop de loop and pull.

 

[DankSmoker]

Duct tape. In fact, forget the shoes, all you need is tape.

 

[The News Crews]

Duct tape. In fact, forget the shoes, all you need is tape.

 

[dick brain]

Overhand knot and then grab both laces and make a slip knot with both of them together.

It's faster, easier and more reliable than the goofy shit they teach at school, I don't know why it's not the default.

 

[Poppavalyim Andropoff]

Velcro nigga. Learning is for fags.

slip ons nigga. using your hands is for fags

 

[Pagan Min]

Forget about tying those shoes -- shoelaces are for loser dweebs! STAPLING is where the REAL action's at! Just get yourself one of those industrial staplers, preferably the compressed-air powered type, and BLAMMO! Never worry about tripping over shoelaces again!