He Man Reboot Announced

  • 🏰 The Fediverse is up. If you know, you know.
  • Want to keep track of this thread?
    Accounts can bookmark posts, watch threads for updates, and jump back to where you stopped reading.
    Create account
Kevin Smith has always been a Disney/Warner Brothers cocksucker who deep throated their big corporate cock because he DESPERATELY, DESPERATELY wants to direct a super-hero movie and make a bajillion fucking dollars.

This is hilarious to me because Smith never had the ability to direct an action scene. He can do talking head scenes and walk & talks, and that's basically it.
Check out the last 2 minutes of this clip:

The ending of this scene was supposed to be a big, bloody, shoot out scene with lots of graphic violence. As the story goes, they were on the set and actually preparing to start shooting the fight sequence, and Smith goes, "Eh, I'm tired. Let's just pan over to the door and let all the violence happen off-screen." I'M NOT KIDDING.

But this clip, is the reason why he never got a chance to direct a big budget anything in Hollywood:

I'll admit, this was funny as fuck. Not a smart move to publicly trash someone you worked with though, because literally everyone else in Hollywood goes, "Oh shit. He fucking SAVAGED Jon Peters. I bet he'll do the exact same thing to me if we work together and he ends up not liking me."

A few years later he would go on to do the exact same thing to Bruce Willis.
Here is Smith talking about what it was like to work with Willis on Die Hard (Smith LOVED Willis at the time)

And here's Smith talking about Willis after they filmed Cop Out:

Basically, Bruce Willis is a professional, and Kevin Smith is a lazy, stoner, hack director. So the story we are not hearing is the real reason why Bruce Willis got pissed off at Kevin Smith while they were shooting the movie. I've surmised that Kevin kept fucking shit up and Bruce finally got fed up with his bullshit.

Kevin Smith is a cunt, and I'm glad that this appears to (finally) be the end of his career.
 
Kevin is a pretty based guy, actually. Nothing like you guys think. Just sayin.
Explain how you know this.

You cry at Rise of Skywalker, you're automatically a pathetic loser with no balls.
He also cried after The Last Jedi and CAPTAIN MARVEL. Yes, he cried over Captain Marvel.
I think there are a couple of other movies he's cried over, but to be honest, it's hard to keep track of all of the things that make him cry.
 
He also cried after The Last Jedi and CAPTAIN MARVEL. Yes, he cried over Captain Marvel.
I think there are a couple of other movies he's cried over, but to be honest, it's hard to keep track of all of the things that make him cry.
It's amazing, somehow you made him even of a miserable cuck.
 
It's better then Nu-Ra, but still disappointing in its own right. I assume this is supposed to lead to some kind of longer series, but I think they bungled Teela. It's an easy fix if you still wan to do 'Teela and frens", just don't make the emotion the drives her be anger, make it grief. I also think killing off characters is dumb, and just shows me the people working on this show don't get it.
 
Kevin is a pretty based guy, actually. Nothing like you guys think. Just sayin.
image1-9.png
 
Sweet tapdancing Christ. I mean, I knew it was going to be subversive shit no matter what Kevin Smith had been saying, but at least I thought it was going to be your typical Last Jedi shit where Adam was going to spend every episode groveling before Teela, telling her how awesome she is, and letting her take center stage on everything... but at least I thought he was still going to be the main character! I didn't think he was going to literally be killed off in episode 1 and have the rest of the show be about Teela.

Adam is not even a supporting character in the show named after him! :story: Jesus Christ am I glad I didn't even think for a second that this was going to be worth watching.
 
What really sad is that they coulda had their cake and ate it too.

Just drop the flash back he man shit, and have a story A teela and story B adam. and just jump back and forth so while Teela is trying to deal with X problem have adam get an arch where he has to deal with not having the sword of power, have something to give weight to his "sacrifices"

Have teela emote a bunch of confronting bullshit about love secrets etc.

On the smith talk.

the fucking 1990s are gone, he made a few meh movies that spoke to mid 90s counter culture.

He also drank from the poison chalice with his "an evening with kevin smith" shit.

he tells in funny and relatable way how hollywood works he breaks the rule that since you dont know where someone will end up, you always kiss everyone s ass all the time.

The netflix show was a fucking grift and he fucked up. I doubt he had that much to do with it, I bet a committee of writers told him what they wanted.

his job was to cash the fucking check and promote it.

The clownfish shit was soo fucking stupid. all he had to do was say nothing, or just be alittle tease and say "oh well just wait till the show drops and tell me how you feel tee hee"

Also mark hamil was just doing the joker.
 
Also mark hamil was just doing the joker.
Let's take a moment to point out Mark Hammil is now a conspirator in the destruction of two beloved franchises now. He really needs to be more careful what contracts he signs.

Let's also take a moment to remember that it's not just He Man that got deconstructed here. They took Teela from us too.
1627141416235.png
At least we have the memories. I know some people here are saying we cannot be critical without seeing it first. But I disagree. Just knowing this exists is bad enough. I don't want to further corrupt my childhood memories by actually watching this shit.
 
Had a thought, it ends on a cliffhanger. Meaning we’re gonna get more. How much you wanna bet we’ll see the Snake Men in the next part?

For those not in the know, the Snake Men are a race of imperialistic lizards who…… are seemingly all male.

I can’t wait to see what Smith and his team do to them, refugee metaphors, females, scaly shit, vore, talking with a “sssss” in front on of every word like in Fallout Frontier, Teela leading them as her army?

That last one has precedence but I’m sure they’ll ruin it
227290F1-DCCF-481A-9AC3-FC492CAE5839.jpeg
 
Back
Top Bottom