💼 Careercow Hayden Black - Untalented comedian with a string of failures including the infamous Gen Zed; suspended from Twitter

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God this asshole is the most mainstream driven person I have ever laid eyes upon. Everything he posts is about hipster bullshit, social media, topical subjects, smart phones etc. Is he trying to be cool for all the kiddies or something? I'm just waiting for the jokes about: internet explorer, croc shoes, ug boots, Nickelback, ICP, Justin Bieber and whatever other easy targets he uses.


Also he has yet again reposted another joke, about autocorrect just to hammer home how he can't make jokes about anything which isn't an easy target. Jokes aren't funny if I know that the punch line is going to be "Hey guys! X is bad right?" This guy makes staring at a brick wall for 5 hours sound absolutely riveting
 
Wezofthenow said:
[MEDIA=twitter]680808266759184384[/MEDIA]
God this asshole is the most mainstream driven person I have ever laid eyes upon. Everything he posts is about hipster bullshit, social media, topical subjects, smart phones etc. Is he trying to be cool for all the kiddies or something? I'm just waiting for the jokes about: internet explorer, croc shoes, ug boots, Nickelback, ICP, Justin Bieber and whatever other easy targets he uses.
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how-do-you-do-fellow-kids.jpg
 
Hayden Black can't even think of enough shitty, unfunny non-jokes to be able to consistently post new ones. Even a little kid who's just figured out what a joke is is capable of stumbling into telling a funny one, but Black is just desperately flinging words onto his Twitter. It's genuinely sad to see someone fail so completely and utterly.
 
I hope he was trying to say the tattoo was on his mom's stomach, otherwise it looks like we've found another one of his fetishes.
 
I was at a Christmas party and I was told the following joke:

"Why does a snowman carry a candy cane?"

Cause he's old!

That jokes was from a 5 year old, who is apparently more competent at telling jokes than Black.
 
I had this joke in a Christmas Cracker.

Why did the onion cry?

Because he cut himself.

That joke was better than any of the 3 or 4 jokes Hayden tells.
 
Wezofthenow said:
[MEDIA=twitter]680808266759184384[/MEDIA]
God this asshole is the most mainstream driven person I have ever laid eyes upon. Everything he posts is about hipster bullshit, social media, topical subjects, smart phones etc. Is he trying to be cool for all the kiddies or something? I'm just waiting for the jokes about: internet explorer, croc shoes, ug boots, Nickelback, ICP, Justin Bieber and whatever other easy targets he uses.

[MEDIA=twitter]680955731214913536[/MEDIA]
Also he has yet again reposted another joke, about autocorrect just to hammer home how he can't make jokes about anything which isn't an easy target. Jokes aren't funny if I know that the punch line is going to be "Hey guys! X is bad right?" This guy makes staring at a brick wall for 5 hours sound absolutely riveting
Click to expand...
Honestly, not to get all feels-y up in here, but stuff like this just makes me kind of pity the guy. He increasingly reminds me of one of those older guys who still talks about how great his high school football career was and really wants the teens to like him. It's that depressing, out of touch "I can still be hip" shit you see guys pull in their fifties when their hair starts going and they realize their quiet suburban life isn't quite what they hoped it would be.
Hayden is desperate to force people to find him funny. He's already had one big project fail, and the sheer stench of the desperation surrounding Gen Zed makes the whole thing feel like some sad last ditch effort to be popular. :c
 
Okay, the fuck is up with this "pew pew" garbage? I mean, I thought I had a handle on it; I thought it was some cutesy-wutesy, hipster-infantile way of saying "shots fired," but now the idiot is punctuating every joke with it if he has the characters left. Was I right before, and he just used it so much it lost all meaning?
 
NegaCWC said:
I think pew pew is supposed to be some kind of a text equivalent of a laugh track.
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Actually its the sound of a gun being fired twice after you read the joke, one bullet shot at your monitor so you don't have to see the joke anymore and one to the head to end your suffering.
 
Wezofthenow said:
Actually its the sound of a gun being fired twice after you read the joke, one bullet shot at your monitor so you don't have to see the joke anymore and one to the head to end your suffering.
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This is how you construct a joke Hayden.
 
https://kiwifarms.net/attachments/haydenpointsm-png.52597/ Why did the chicken cross the road?

BECAUSE OF TRANS-REPRESENTATION ISSUES YOU RACIST

BUY MY SHIT

PEW PEW
 
Dr. Boe Jangles Esq. said:
Honestly, not to get all feels-y up in here, but stuff like this just makes me kind of pity the guy. He increasingly reminds me of one of those older guys who still talks about how great his high school football career was and really wants the teens to like him. It's that depressing, out of touch "I can still be hip" shit you see guys pull in their fifties when their hair starts going and they realize their quiet suburban life isn't quite what they hoped it would be.
Hayden is desperate to force people to find him funny. He's already had one big project fail, and the sheer stench of the desperation surrounding Gen Zed makes the whole thing feel like some sad last ditch effort to be popular. :c
Click to expand...
There is some serious, borderline-obsessive desperation going on with Hayden's behavior, to be sure, but in the event you're starting to feel sorry for him, you've also got to keep in mind how much of a callous asshole he is on every single social media account we've seen. There's no real warmth there for people who actually like his stuff, just some touch-and-go thanks that transform into snark and one-upmanship the second someone expresses anything but absolute praise. This dude's delusions have much more to do with the dollar signs in his eyes than any genuine desire to be enjoyed and respected by the younger folk. (And very probably the promise of getting laid that so often influences male allies in SJW settings.)
 
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