HATERS TO THE LEFT

[Lil]

So Barb moved out, left Chris behind, and Chris claimed himself as his own? That doesn't seem too farfetched.

At this point, Barb getting off the sofa is pretty farfetched.

If she goes, the sofa goes.

 

[spaps]

So Barb moved out, left Chris behind, and Chris claimed himself as his own? That doesn't seem too farfetched.

At this point, Barb getting off the sofa is pretty farfetched.

Good point. Let me rephrase that.
WARNING: TIME PARADOX

Spoiler

So Chris moved out, left himself behind, and Chris claimed himself as his own.

 

[Donald Duck]

Well, this explains it.
http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=haters to the left
http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=free bitch
Damn, he really is turning into a 12 year-old girl.

or according to definition #2
"2. Free Bitch
55 up, 33 down

A person who is not in a relationship with anyone else. Basically, a person who isn't taken."


seems about right.

Using definition #2 and given that the sign says "I am my own free bitch", does Chris mean that he's decided that he is his own perfect boyfriend free girl he's been pining after??

Also, using definition #3 "a dog that you get for free because your deadbeat neighbors moved out and left it behind.", I kinda want to imagine that he feels abandoned by his neighbors (ie. everyone around him) and it's the latest incarnation of the attraction sign. The first sign telling the haters (who he probably thinks 100% of them are men/jerks) to GTFO and the hideous pig-tails could be a retarded imitation of a groomed poodle or a breed with long ears, with the message being "I'm a poor abandoned puppy, won't you take me home to feed and cuddle??". Definition #2 still applies!

 

[TL 611]

I feel jaded. The explanation of the signs is "someone's fucking with Chris and told him to do it". Quite boring really

His hair on the other hand is FABULOUS

 

[spaps]

I feel jaded. The explanation of the signs is "someone's fucking with Chris and told him to do it". Quite boring really

Wait, what? Did Marvin say that on another thread?

 

[Tubular Monkey]

Yeah, I'm starting to think that this "free bitch" thing might be his Chandleresque way of telling all da ladies that he is available for sex. Do not be extremely surprised if he's still holding those signs, or signs like them, in the near future at Fridays After Five, or other places where non-demented people who are protective of their children congregate.

 

[Marvin]

I feel jaded. The explanation of the signs is "someone's fucking with Chris and told him to do it". Quite boring really

Wait, what? Did Marvin say that on another thread?

Heh, I don't think I did. :?

 

[UltraSonichu]

Well, this explains it.
http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=haters to the left
http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=free bitch
Damn, he really is turning into a 12 year-old girl.

or according to definition #2
"2. Free Bitch
55 up, 33 down

A person who is not in a relationship with anyone else. Basically, a person who isn't taken."


seems about right.

Using definition #2 and given that the sign says "I am my own free bitch", does Chris mean that he's decided that he is his own perfect boyfriend free girl he's been pining after??

You've made the erroneous assumption that Chris actually bothered to find out the urban dictionary definition of 'free bitch' before writing his sign. He probably thinks its just a kewl girl power way to express his independence, as part of whatever Marvin has been subtly hinting at.

 

[DrChristianTroy]

I feel jaded. The explanation of the signs is "someone's fucking with Chris and told him to do it". Quite boring really

Wait, what? Did Marvin say that on another thread?

Heh, I don't think I did. :?

Well you did. Totally did. *crosses finger for confirmation*

 

[Kosher Dill]

I know incontinence threads are verboten on pain of expulsion (get it?), but that last post did make me wonder if Chris's "accidents" happened in high school too and if he was secretly known as the yard who shat himself every month or so.

Lucas and Mimms said it never happened during Chris's Game Place years, and Lord knows he had his share of stressful moments there. I don't think he's really the intestinal firehose some people make him out to be.

 

[Anchuent Christory]

I think it's really just Chris saying "hate me if you want, I don't care, this is the way I am and I act how I want" But as per usual, Chris' ability to meaningfully convey what he's trying to say is rather poor.

I know incontinence threads are verboten on pain of expulsion (get it?), but that last post did make me wonder if Chris's "accidents" happened in high school too and if he was secretly known as the yard who shat himself every month or so.

Lucas and Mimms said it never happened during Chris's Game Place years, and Lord knows he had his share of stressful moments there. I don't think he's really the intestinal firehose some people make him out to be.

Yeah, I've never believed that Chris is perpetually shitting himself. I think it's simply a case where his awful diet fucks up his guts, combined with his repulsive habit of gleefully breaking wind regardless of his surroundings. The result is

But as with so many CWC related things, the community just picked it up and ran with it.

 

[2_CUTE_2_BOLT]

So Barb moved out, left Chris behind, and Chris claimed himself as his own? That doesn't seem too farfetched.

At this point, Barb getting off the sofa is pretty farfetched.

Still more believable than #1: Chris not caring what others think...

Wait... has Chris ever cared what others thought or is he too dense or self-centered to care about what others think? I was going to say he didn't disobey "mommy" because of concern of her thoughts of him. Then it dawned on me that he is probably more scared of her punishments than anything else.

 

[Kosher Dill]

I don't think Chris has ever *known* what others thought. Autism, you know. He's consistenly clueless about what makes other people tick, and why they ignore his drunken shouts.

 

[LordCustos3]

Hell, he fabricated a promise "owed" to him about his 10 year high school reunion just because of a single slide in a slide show at his graduation.

His autistic mind probably thought "Hey if I go back to highschool maybe my life'll be back to the way it was back then, and I'll be rolling in pussy"

...and nobody wins when that happens. How do you think Desi and Skittles met their end?

 

[DykesDykesChina]

I think Chris should drop all this tomgirl shit, emigrate to Germany and live together with some German Punks in Bochum, Hamburg or Berlin. His attitude towards work and hygiene would be largely accepted there, and an "Iro" punk haircut would look far better on his head than these loli preteen pigtails. Also, the dope and beer might make him mellow out a bit, and he might get hankypanky with a drunk 15 year old girl who ran away from home.
Do a Google video search for "APPD Wahlwerbespot" to see what I mean.

 

[Vincent]

Will Chris ever drop the Tomgirl shit?

I think Bob's death ensured it'd last longer, as he hated the whole Tomgirl thing the most, and I know Barb isn't that happy about it, but if Barb has such a tight leash on Chris, why doesn't she put her foot down and end the Tomgirl thing all together? I know Marvin said his crossdressing isn't as noticeable as we'd like to think (This picture aside), but someone like Barb who has control over Chris would surely put an end to that?

That's one thing that has always confused me.

 

[Marvin]

Will Chris ever drop the Tomgirl shit?

I think Bob's death ensured it'd last longer, as he hated the whole Tomgirl thing the most, and I know Barb isn't that happy about it, but if Barb has such a tight leash on Chris, why doesn't she put her foot down and end the Tomgirl thing all together? I know Marvin said his crossdressing isn't as noticeable as we'd like to think (This picture aside), but someone like Barb who has control over Chris would surely put an end to that?

That's one thing that has always confused me.

In practice, all that remains of his tomgirl shit is the long hair. He just looks like a balding fat man with long hair. He doesn't really crossdress in public anymore.

And when it comes to Barb, she's very forceful with Chris in some ways, but like I said in another thread, she doesn't have 100% control over him and she knows this. She knows she can get tough and take away some things in Chris' life, because they're not important enough to him for him to fight back about it.

Basically, while she's bothered by the tomgirl stuff, it's not worth fighting with him over it. She has her manchild to cuddle with and it's worth a little tomgirl shit, especially because she doesn't have to see it first hand. (aside from the long hair, I guess)

 

[Hyperion]

I think Chris should drop all this tomgirl shit, emigrate to Germany and live together with some German Punks in Bochum, Hamburg or Berlin. His attitude towards work and hygiene would be largely accepted there, and an "Iro" punk haircut would look far better on his head than these loli preteen pigtails. Also, the dope and beer might make him mellow out a bit, and he might get hankypanky with a drunk 15 year old girl who ran away from home.
Do a Google video search for "APPD Wahlwerbespot" to see what I mean.

But Chris would never move to Europe! His dad fought the Koreans there!

 

[Vincent]

Will Chris ever drop the Tomgirl shit?

I think Bob's death ensured it'd last longer, as he hated the whole Tomgirl thing the most, and I know Barb isn't that happy about it, but if Barb has such a tight leash on Chris, why doesn't she put her foot down and end the Tomgirl thing all together? I know Marvin said his crossdressing isn't as noticeable as we'd like to think (This picture aside), but someone like Barb who has control over Chris would surely put an end to that?

That's one thing that has always confused me.

In practice, all that remains of his tomgirl shit is the long hair. He just looks like a balding fat man with long hair. He doesn't really crossdress in public anymore.

And when it comes to Barb, she's very forceful with Chris in some ways, but like I said in another thread, she doesn't have 100% control over him and she knows this. She knows she can get tough and take away some things in Chris' life, because they're not important enough to him for him to fight back about it.

Basically, while she's bothered by the tomgirl stuff, it's not worth fighting with him over it. She has her manchild to cuddle with and it's worth a little tomgirl shit, especially because she doesn't have to see it first hand. (aside from the long hair, I guess)

Ah, okay. Thanks for clarification

 

[DrChristianTroy]

I think Chris should drop all this tomgirl shit, emigrate to Germany and live together with some German Punks in Bochum, Hamburg or Berlin. His attitude towards work and hygiene would be largely accepted there, and an "Iro" punk haircut would look far better on his head than these loli preteen pigtails. Also, the dope and beer might make him mellow out a bit, and he might get hankypanky with a drunk 15 year old girl who ran away from home.
Do a Google video search for "APPD Wahlwerbespot" to see what I mean.

Honestly I'd be happy if he cut his hair period. Could be a mohawk, could shave it all off, heck it could be a multicolored bowl cut and it'd still look better. I mean if he isn't going to take care of his hair he might as well cut it.