Greggs - Storebought pastry discussion

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haglover said:
Really? I would 100x eat a primary school pizza over a Gregg's one, maybe I just had a particularly bad one? I usually can get through most bad food that isn't poison but I could not do their pizza. I think my area's Greggs are just particularly bad because I had the worst toastie in my life from one of them and I don't even know how you fuck up a toastie.

Also their sweet pastries aren't too bad either if you want to cram a bunch of sugar down your throat
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I like them, no joke. They're cheap compared to any other pizza options. The trick is to get them when they're still hot and a little undercooked so the cheese isn't overly browned.
 
I remember one time when I went to sit at the back of a Greggs' restaurant, some shady Indian/Paki guy came up to me and started flashing money at me from his wallet. I didn't understand what he said, I think he wanted me to give the money to the manager or spend the money, but I got a bad feeling and walked away. What's the strangest thing to happen to you in Greggs?
 
Shlomo XL said:
That said, the local offerings can be quite delightful, a review of a few of which will be posted next paycheque.
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:sigh: No paycheque. Well... fuck it, we review.

Now, there's no Greggs in Russia; the closest things to it would be Buhanka (буханка, lit. "loaf") that specs into bread and quite basic (and overpriced) pastries with no "specials" of note, and a noname (and i do mean noname; "Bakery 24" is what they're called) chain staffed exclusively with Foreign Specialists (which doesn't stop 'em from having great food, though) - on which more shall be written later. Fer nœw, please join me on a trip down to a local* Da!.
*if you count 4 hours on foot as "local", that is.

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Yes, the supermarket chain is indeed named just "Yes!".

Every store of theirs comes with an in-house bakery, and their selection - while not quite as vast as Greggs' - is still quite a mouthful to go through; there's only so much dough one can eat in a week.

My intent originally was to compare sausage rolls (and various bakes) sold by different chains/joints in Moscow, but it was rather discouraging to sample subpar and even outright dogshit product at 2-3 times the price of Da!'s pretty-good-for-a-sosijroll diddy, so the next few posts will focus on their catalogue. Today, I present you the ham-and-cheese pocket and (guessed it) the sausage roll.

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"! Sampling of the product is prohibited" lmfao
Had it if not straight out of the oven, then ten-minutes-or-less close to it. Sweet flaky outer shell, very standard cheese and cheap ham filling still hot; adequately savoury and pleasant. Not supernatural, but fine to eat - it's an okay pastry. $0.4

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Now, the sæsoodjjrulle. The outer shell has PERFECT crunch and sweet taste, and the sosij is somehow juicier than your standard hot dog; not oversalted, and quite savory. I came into the store not hungry, and yet gobbled down both. Compared to Russia's largest supermarket chain (🤢 Пятёрочка)'s bakery, this thing is top notch and on its own quite enjoyable at $0.5.


Greggs.


Persona Grata said:
Can you add savory to pastry in the title?
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It's a general pastry discussion. Get a donut.

WardTrangler said:
I am thoroughly disappointed that this thread isn’t about gregg the western canadian industrial supply distrib-
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Make one?
 
Shlomo XL said:
My intent originally was to compare sausage rolls (and various bakes) sold by different chains/joints in Moscow, but it was rather discouraging to sample subpar and even outright dogshit product at 2-3 times the price of Da!'s pretty-good-for-a-sosijroll diddy,
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I didn't even know they made sausage rolls outside the UK.
 
I always play Greggs roulette when I visit. Just ask what's warm when you're there. Unless the festive bakes are on. You always get a festive bake.

cheese and onion pasties and steak bakes are okay but if you can get them from a different baker they always blow the greggs ones out the water. I do want to make my own cheese and onion pasty sometime.
 
I always preferred Burney's. There used to be a Burney's right next to the Greggs where I lived in the 90s. Always had a better vanilla slice, but Greggs had the better sausage roll. Then it became hampsons for a bit, when Sayers was glomming everything to try and become a Greggs-beater, and then it closed down and Greggs just sort of became the default.
 
Shlomo XL said:
Get a donut.
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Three different varieites of donuts from Da! have been acquired and secured.

First, the humble Berliner.

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Keeps well, moderately greasy, delightfully soft and tastefully chewy; this thing sits at a whopping $0.29 per piece and goes fat-astically with coffee and cream and a little less so with @Thé au lait if you will excuse the pun for some reason.

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Not gushing with filling per se, but quite full of it nonetheless. Good deal. Tastes good.


On the next "tier" at $0.58 there's the Standard American™:

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It's a donut.

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No filling. Greasetacular. Shouldn't have gotten three of them. Somehow, overall less desirable than the Berlin variant, but goes better with tea? It's certainly the worse deal out of the two if you don't much care for glazing or the sprinkledness.


Then - at almost a dollar - there's the cronut. That is, a crouton crossbred with a don... no, wait, that can't be right.

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It's a croissant-donut mix, which does explain the texture and structure of the thing... the bake wizards at Da!, however, went a step further and added jam filling (or, in the case of the stock image, vaguely almond-flavoured mousse) to it and the result is quite possibly THE mixed-baggest article of their pastry I've had the pleasure to sample.

On one hand, it's... novel (and tastes alright). On the other, you're not going to want to have it over the 3x cheaper German offering if hamming down pastry isn't something you do on the daily; I can't say that the mouthfeel is vastly superior to their donut's, or that it has something positively unique going for it to warrant the price difference - which tracks, considering they are the least popular of the three options with far more units (than their cheaper brothers') left unsold at the end of the day.

Next up: Dapizzas. dOugh boy.
 
I wonder if that Chili Cheese bake was a limited time item
 
There's an alternate bakery chain called Bayne's which has been opening in a few areas. Stopped by a few times, they make nice pork sausage rolls.

Can this thread suffice as a Wetherspoons thread? I personally think the breakfast items are the best on their menu, I quite like the the Miner's Benedict.
 
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