💥 Trainwreck Gloria Tesch / Sofia Nova - Author of the Maradonia series turned Republithot

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Choo choo motherfuckers:

shaner.jpg
 
I just want to say that Watermelon is my favorite Gloria fanboy.

"You look like a seal."
 
Seinor_IRL said:
With this talk about Gloria having charisma or the possibility of pursuing an acting career (I don't want to consider that she'd be doing porn anytime soon), I was drawn to this video....

https://youtube.com/watch?v=AfCnW1MDt9o
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I don't recall seeing this video before but it really should have given us our first clue that all was not well in Tesch-land. Check out the car Glo-Glo gets into from 0:30 to 0:40. The kind of person Glo-Glo is pretending to be wouldn't drive an old Chevy Cavalier, even if it was equipped with that awesome jungle-print upholstery/interior. And now she's trying to get everyone to believe that she drives some sort of high-end convertible? Riiiight...
 
Muscle Bra said:
I don't recall seeing this video before but it really should have given us our first clue that all was not well in Tesch-land. Check out the car Glo-Glo gets into from 0:30 to 0:40. The kind of person Glo-Glo is pretending to be wouldn't drive an old Chevy Cavalier, even if it was equipped with that awesome jungle-print upholstery/interior. And now she's trying to get everyone to believe that she drives some sort of high-end convertible? Riiiight...
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Where is the spot she wants us to believe she drives the convertible?

I went though her instagram and there was this one video where some creepy old guy with a camera was saying "Hello everybody this is glo-ee-uhh and she is a mirrrrr-maid" very slow like you might say to a disabled 10 year old.

I'll dig it up later maybe but... well you should see it. I wouldn't want my daughter around any such dude.
 
ChuckSlaughter said:
Where is the spot she wants us to believe she drives the convertible?

I went though her instagram and there was this one video where some creepy old guy with a camera was saying "Hello everybody this is glo-ee-uhh and she is a mirrrrr-maid" very slow like you might say to a disabled 10 year old.

I'll dig it up later maybe but... well you should see it. I wouldn't want my daughter around any such dude.
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It's pretty clear Gloria's dad regards her as a revenue stream, and not much more.
 
ChuckSlaughter said:
Where is the spot she wants us to believe she drives the convertible?
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Check out this video, which she hash-tagged with #convertible:

And this pic, in which she claimed this was her convertible, parked in front of her "bae's" house:
 
Muscle Bra said:
Check out this video, which she hash-tagged with #convertible:
[MEDIA=instagram]675nlerpVJ[/MEDIA]
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Wait, is that a rosary hanging from the rear-view mirror? Dear god, she's transforming into my bitchy Catholic grandma.

Muscle Bra said:
And this pic, in which she claimed this was her convertible, parked in front of her "bae's" house:
[MEDIA=instagram]58R1mLrpZE[/MEDIA]
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And yet said "bae" is conspicuously absent.

Also that car is missing the obligatory "Jesus is my co-pilot" bumper sticker that every rear-view-mirror-rosary must be paired with according to religious law. Confirmed for not being the same one she's driving in the first pic.
 
Man watching all these videos after learning she's poor is a whole nother experience.
Muscle Bra said:
And this pic, in which she claimed this was her convertible, parked in front of her "bae's" house:
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Watching all these videos when I know she's poor is just whole nother experience. You'd never know that her house is foreclosed on and her parents have been reporting no income for years. Jeez the whole thing depends on being so believable. I mean who wouldn't be sort of impressed if they met some sort of doctor somewhere and he said his daughter had published 3 books that were super popular and she was a model? Even the laughable commercial that he made is passable, if I saw the modeling pictures I'd believe it, ... everything is just barely passable and people like believing they've met someone interesting.

Other people seem to call the guy by name, so she's probably at least friends with "julian bae". He seems to have an unusually large house in her social circle going by the comments, for all we know she could have rented or testdrove the car and taken 100 videos, drove to her boyfriend's house for more promo shots or whatever. I wonder what "julian" considers their status to be.

If gloria doesn't get to keep the car I wonder what kinda of stuff she tells her friends when it suddenly goes away?
 
Geez, of all her videos I think this one might actually be the worst. What is the point of these supposed to be? Those lamp posts have more personality and intrigue than her, I kept finding my eyes drifting over to them instead.
 
That's a permanent installation in Los Angeles as part of the Museum of Contemporary Art. It's also a haven for wannabe actors, musicians and models to take bullshit headshots at and is a general tourist location.
It's also completely open air and requires no fees or permits to use.
 
that1guy said:
It's also a haven for wannabe actors, musicians and models to take bullshit headshots at and is ... also completely open air and requires no fees or permits to use.
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So, a completely free place to shoot where talentless actors, musicians and models congregate? That's four plus marks for our Glo-Glo right there.

And that video? Jeezus. Her every action is just so artificial and contrived looking. Scarlett Johansson played a more convincing human in "Under The Skin"...
 
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