💥 Trainwreck Gloria Tesch / Sofia Nova - Author of the Maradonia series turned Republithot

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I've noticed that all of Richie's puppet shows come from the Old Testament, which tells you a lot about the church Richie and Gunther attend. To completely generalize here, the philosophies between the Old and New Testaments are very different. The Old Testament god was very vengeful and apt to punish people for the slightest transgressions and was always smiting things with fire and brimstone, while the New Testament god was more of the forgiveness and "turn the other cheek" school of thought.

To be completely over-reaching, most modern/moderate churches tend to teach the New Testament, while the more conservative/fundamentalist churches gravitate to the Old Testament. I suppose it's not much of a surprise on which side of the fence Richie and Gunther fall.

(And that is pretty much the extent of my theological knowledge...)
 
Muscle Bra said:
I've noticed that all of Richie's puppet shows come from the Old Testament, which tells you a lot about the church Richie and Gunther attend. To completely generalize here, the philosophies between the Old and New Testaments are very different. The Old Testament god was very vengeful and apt to punish people for the slightest transgressions and was always smiting things with fire and brimstone, while the New Testament god was more of the forgiveness and "turn the other cheek" school of thought.

To be completely over-reaching, most modern/moderate churches tend to teach the New Testament, while the more conservative/fundamentalist churches gravitate to the Old Testament. I suppose it's not much of a surprise on which side of the fence Richie and Gunther fall.

(And that is pretty much the extent of my theological knowledge...)
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That and your scam artists, and shady people of sorts tend to gravitate towards fundie churches. Probably in part because the congregations are usually very small, and very isolated and distant from the main community at large, usually have an "us vs. them" attitude, and are easily controlled and manipulated.
 
Muscle Bra said:
I've noticed that all of Richie's puppet shows come from the Old Testament, which tells you a lot about the church Richie and Gunther attend. To completely generalize here, the philosophies between the Old and New Testaments are very different. The Old Testament god was very vengeful and apt to punish people for the slightest transgressions and was always smiting things with fire and brimstone, while the New Testament god was more of the forgiveness and "turn the other cheek" school of thought.

To be completely over-reaching, most modern/moderate churches tend to teach the New Testament, while the more conservative/fundamentalist churches gravitate to the Old Testament. I suppose it's not much of a surprise on which side of the fence Richie and Gunther fall.

(And that is pretty much the extent of my theological knowledge...)
Click to expand...
The more conservative ones gravitate towards the OT because of the punishments and because it's where Leviticus is so they have a reason to hate teh gheys. It's fun to point out to them that they push that part of Leviticus but ignore the one about eating shellfish or wearing clothes made of mixed fibers. While the less conservative ones go towards the NT because it's all about Jesus.

But getting back to Glo Glo and Herr Tesch, I'm wondering if this could be part of a long con. It started off innocently enough with young Glo Glo writing and her parents praising her for it. As time went on, they started to think to themselves that they had the next Harry Potter on their hands. After all if JK Rowlings went from nothing to one of the richest women in Great Britain, why not Glo Glo? But whereas JK Rowling had a certain amount of talent and hit that sweet spot in young adult fiction, Glo Glo had none and her books were met with a resounding yawn. So what came naturally to JK, they've been trying to manufacture ever since in an attempt to get rich.

The con part would be getting investors to pay into it, culminating in a proposed $30 million movie with a Chinese lead, funding by Chinese money and facilitated by Dr. Burn Victim with his evangelizing connections. Now if I could only figure out where Mr. Uberdriver fits into all this...
 
Phil Ken Sebben said:
Now if I could only figure out where Mr. Uberdriver fits into all this...
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Mr. Uberdriver is just Gloria's financial security in case Maradonia goes South. There's no way they're in love, but I doubt he's got enough Russian mob money to fund Maradonia. Keep in mind she was cramped into a small apartment with her mom last we heard of her. But now that both her and Mama Tesch are engaged thanks to the latter's mail order bride savvy, they may well both be living at their respective fiance's places and as we saw Glo Glo is driving a new con-ver-ti-buh. After living in that foreclosed mansion for so long, the life of a pauper just wouldn't do for the Tesch women.
 
Your donation will purchase everything the teenager needs: food, shoes, a Bible, umbrella, clothing, bedding, vocational school supplies, daily necessities (toothpaste, shampoo, etc.), and medical care.

Your monthly donation goes into the teenager’s fund. Some months a foster care family may spend more than $30 per teen, such as when vocational tuition has to be paid or when extra clothing or medical care is needed. We pay the cost of living expenses and/or tuition for the teens when they live at the vocational school and are not in the foster home.

So...no telling people specifically where their money goes. $30/month is more than enough to provide basic toiletries and necessities, BTW.
 
Maradontia said:
But now that both her and Mama Tesch are engaged thanks to the latter's mail order bride savvy, they may well both be living at their respective fiance's places...
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Marina is engaged too? I don't think I knew that.
 
Muscle Bra said:
Marina is engaged too? I don't think I knew that.
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It says so on her Facebook page, Marina Marichka T. You can see her, Glo Glo, and several other relatives on the banner image. T is for Tesch I guess, but I thought she'd have gotten rid of it after the divorce. According to the tags in her other pic, her fiance is Eosik Sovkovich from Russia. She also seems to talk to Alex Srcn a lot, leading me to believe he's her friend and she set up the marriage with Gloria.
 
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Maradontia said:
She also seems to talk to Alex Srcn a lot, leading me to believe he's her friend and she set up the marriage with Gloria.
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That's not at all creepy or questionable.

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So what were the odds that the Marriage thats happening is arranged and has been paid for by some rich foreign group in order for someone to get out of the country to avoid the heat for a few years?

It seems like the sort of thing they'd do.
 
Brandobaris said:
So what were the odds that the Marriage thats happening is arranged and has been paid for by some rich foreign group in order for someone to get out of the country to avoid the heat for a few years?

It seems like the sort of thing they'd do.
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I don't know, that seems a bit extreme.
I'm leaning towards a simple marriage of convenience in both cases.
Marina and Gloria both speak Russian, have American passports and have connections to Russia (Marina's mother lives there and they visit her once in a while) so fishing for a rich husband who wants to move to America is not that difficult.
 
Beyond her general churchiness and preachiness (in the midst of her creepy familial T & A), has Gloria ever posted anything homophobic? Among kids in their 20s, that's so not cool, so wondering if her cluelessness goes that far.
 
Tom B Jobe said:
Beyond her general churchiness and preachiness (in the midst of her creepy familial T & A), has Gloria ever posted anything homophobic? Among kids in their 20s, that's so not cool, so wondering if her cluelessness goes that far.
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Well, there's the video where she talks about the corruption of today's youth because they don't have Jesus in their lives. Pretty sure she's talking about drinking and premarital sex, though.


Cue Gloria shaking her ass in a bikini in the Convertible video (the Wild For the Night one was taken down).


Then again, she could be one of those Christians who thinks they can do ANYTHING as long as they have faith because everyone is a sinner and only Jesus saves.
 
It's kinda funny how Gloria's YouTube channel is called GloriaTeschVEVO, even though she has NOTHING to do with Universal, EMI, or Sony Music. She could get flagged as a fake account so fast...
 
Tom B Jobe said:
Beyond her general churchiness and preachiness (in the midst of her creepy familial T & A), has Gloria ever posted anything homophobic? Among kids in their 20s, that's so not cool, so wondering if her cluelessness goes that far.
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Not an example of homophobia per se, but I recall someone here posting a tweet she made about Caitlyn Jenner with the hashtag '#disgusting'. I wouldn't be surprised if also she believed the gays caused Hurricane Katrina.
 
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ShortPoppy said:
Not an example of homophobia per se, but I recall someone here posting a tweet she made about Caitlyn Jenner with the hashtag '#disgusting'. I wouldn't be surprised if also she believed the gays caused Hurricane Katrina.
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Well, Bruce is really disgusting, as is John Flynt and the other Fred Flintstone esque giant trannies with pages on here. The good trannies are the ones you don't know are trannies with their clothes on.
 
Maradontia said:
Well, there's the video where she talks about the corruption of today's youth because they don't have Jesus in their lives. Pretty sure she's talking about drinking and premarital sex, though.

Cue Gloria shaking her ass in a bikini in the Convertible video (the Wild For the Night one was taken down).

Then again, she could be one of those Christians who thinks they can do ANYTHING as long as they have faith because everyone is a sinner and only Jesus saves.
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I might be completely overanalyzing this but I think I’ve finally been able to reconcile the vast differences between the two Glorias. On one hand, we have the good little Christian girl who spouts religious right dogma and writes thinly-veiled fundie propaganda posing as a childrens’ book and, on the other hand, we have the bikini-wearing party girl who gets nekkid for synthetic marijuana.

Sure -- it would be easy to say that Glo-Glo is just being a hypocrite but I’m starting to think there’s a deeper pathology than that. We all know Glo-Glo has been completely controlled by her parents and is merely a tabula rasa for them to use to obtain their own goals, dreams, aspirations, etc. However, I've been operating under the impression that the Family Tesch had one end goal in mind but ... what if each of the parents had a completely different vision/purpose for Gloria?

We know Gerry is hard religious right and pretty active in his church, so it’s pretty clear he wants to use Glo-Glo and Maradonia to spread the word of god and save those heathen souls and gain street cred in his church (and, just maybe, line his pockets with the proceeds from the Maradonia empire). Marina, however, is living vicariously through Glo-Glo and wants Glo-Glo to live the life she never had. Remember – *this* is a picture of herself that Marina posted, which tells you a lot about her goals and outlook on life.

https://kiwifarms.net/attachments/mommatesch-jpg.64409/

We all know that Maradonia is crap but -- at the very least -- the book (and the movie, for the most part) don't over-sexualize Maya/Glo-Glo, while the Goldilocks videos … well, no need to go there. Plus, don’t forget that Marina took some very revealing photos of Glo shortly after she turned 18 and we also have some pretty strong evidence that Marina engineered the relationship with the Uberman. (And, for that matter, Marina even appeared in the “Convertible” video.) Hence, Marina has Glo doing all the things Marina wanted to do, but couldn't.

So … if the book writing and the movie acting and the business side of things all came from Gerry and the modeling, rapping, partying, and social media presence was Marina, I think that would go pretty far towards addressing the dichotomy between the two Glo-Glo personas. Even more (and here is where I am admittedly making a lot of assumptions), could this have created an underlying conflict between Gerry and Marina that led to the divorce? I’m pretty convinced that Gerry and Marina’s marriage was just a way for Marina to get her US citizenship (because why on earth would the INS give a permanent visa/green card to some random Russian artist?) so we already know their relationship was closer to a business arrangement than a romantic one (which actually makes Glo's engagement to the Uberman even creepier).

I dunno, maybe I'm just talking out of my ass but I really have the suspicion that Glo-Glo's two very different personas are the result of Gerry and Marina playing tug-of-war with their little "billion-dollah industry" (as the Maradonia promo video told us)...
 
Muscle Bra said:
I might be completely overanalyzing this but I think I’ve finally been able to reconcile the vast differences between the two Glorias. On one hand, we have the good little Christian girl who spouts religious right dogma and writes thinly-veiled fundie propaganda posing as a childrens’ book and, on the other hand, we have the bikini-wearing party girl who gets nekkid for synthetic marijuana.

Sure -- it would be easy to say that Glo-Glo is just being a hypocrite but I’m starting to think there’s a deeper pathology than that. We all know Glo-Glo has been completely controlled by her parents and is merely a tabula rasa for them to use to obtain their own goals, dreams, aspirations, etc. However, I've been operating under the impression that the Family Tesch had one end goal in mind but ... what if each of the parents had a completely different vision/purpose for Gloria?

We know Gerry is hard religious right and pretty active in his church, so it’s pretty clear he wants to use Glo-Glo and Maradonia to spread the word of god and save those heathen souls and gain street cred in his church (and, just maybe, line his pockets with the proceeds from the Maradonia empire). Marina, however, is living vicariously through Glo-Glo and wants Glo-Glo to live the life she never had. Remember – *this* is a picture of herself that Marina posted, which tells you a lot about her goals and outlook on life.

https://kiwifarms.net/attachments/mommatesch-jpg.64409/

We all know that Maradonia is crap but -- at the very least -- the book (and the movie, for the most part) don't over-sexualize Maya/Glo-Glo, while the Goldilocks videos … well, no need to go there. Plus, don’t forget that Marina took some very revealing photos of Glo shortly after she turned 18 and we also have some pretty strong evidence that Marina engineered the relationship with the Uberman. (And, for that matter, Marina even appeared in the “Convertible” video.) Hence, Marina has Glo doing all the things Marina wanted to do, but couldn't.

So … if the book writing and the movie acting and the business side of things all came from Gerry and the modeling, rapping, partying, and social media presence was Marina, I think that would go pretty far towards addressing the dichotomy between the two Glo-Glo personas. Even more (and here is where I am admittedly making a lot of assumptions), could this have created an underlying conflict between Gerry and Marina that led to the divorce? I’m pretty convinced that Gerry and Marina’s marriage was just a way for Marina to get her US citizenship (because why on earth would the INS give a permanent visa/green card to some random Russian artist?) so we already know their relationship was closer to a business arrangement than a romantic one (which actually makes Glo's engagement to the Uberman even creepier).

I dunno, maybe I'm just talking out of my ass but I really have the suspicion that Glo-Glo's two very different personas are the result of Gerry and Marina playing tug-of-war with their little "billion-dollah industry" (as the Maradonia promo video told us)...
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I also find it odd that both Gerry and Marina jumped all over marketing Gloria as their get rich quick scheme and completely overlooked her brothers. Surely the youngest one really could be the world's youngest author if they started him early.
 
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