💥 Trainwreck Gloria Tesch / Sofia Nova - Author of the Maradonia series turned Republithot

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I'm sure Watermelon linked her to her thread in another failed attempt to be funny. She doesn't seem to directly engage her detractors though, so I doubt she'll register an account here. As lolcows go, she's far more tolerable than the likes of James Terry Mitchell or Vade. She hasn't hurt anyone. She hasn't driven anyone to suicide, she's just a stuck-up young adult, and it's entirely possible she'll grow out of it.
 
Her Dad is sure a jack of all trades isn't he?
 

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DrJonesHat said:
I'm sure Watermelon linked her to her thread in another failed attempt to be funny. She doesn't seem to directly engage her detractors though, so I doubt she'll register an account here. As lolcows go, she's far more tolerable than the likes of James Terry Mitchell or Vade. She hasn't hurt anyone. She hasn't driven anyone to suicide, she's just a stuck-up young adult, and it's entirely possible she'll grow out of it.
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Waterman told me last night that comment on the Starbucks post was his 'swansong,' and that he's not involving himself with anything Gloria or Chris related for a long time. If he actually sticks to that it shows if anything his interest on Gloria is decreasing which is a good thing.

I think things are going to get really funny/noteworthy with Gloria again when this film is released. It really is the most bizarre thing about her, how she pretends the extent she and her family are willing to go to protest that the Maradonia sega is this mega successful franchise, while she's just snotty and will grow out of it possibly I do think there's laughs to be had at her expense.
 
David Miscavige said:
How melodramatic. How long do you think his self imposed exile is going to last?
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I'm not sure, he unsurprisingly seems pretty frustrated that he's been practically locked out of these forums and isn't getting any attention from Chris anymore. He claims to be fed up of the whole thing and in need of reinventing himself.

I don't think many people would have any complaints if he stayed away from Gloria and Chris permanently with his awful brand of "trolling."
 
Karen Riley said:
I'm not sure, he unsurprisingly seems pretty frustrated that he's been practically locked out of these forums and isn't getting any attention from Chris anymore. He claims to be fed up of the whole thing and in need of reinventing himself.
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It was pretty pitiable low-grade weening that he should be ashamed of doing under his real name or, really, at all.
 
AnOminous said:
It was pretty pitiable low-grade weening that he should be ashamed of doing under his real name or, really, at all.
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Deliberately injecting your actual identity into a chris-chan saga has to be one of the most insanely idiotic things anyone could do. Just the amount of weening people have gotten in the past by being mentioned by chris is frightening.
 
ChuckSlaughter said:
Deliberately injecting your actual identity into a chris-chan saga has to be one of the most insanely idiotic things anyone could do. Just the amount of weening people have gotten in the past by being mentioned by chris is frightening.
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Yet amazingly Watermelon thinks that we are the ones getting trolled whenever he acts like a fucking moron on a public Facebook page using his actual name and info.

On-topic: Maradonia movie still not out, fucking bullshit
 
Just FYI on the Maradona movie, before the American Film Market opened in Los Angeles, Dad was desperately trying to find a distributor by passing out DVDs, but to no avail. I saw the DVD. It is everything you all imagine and far, far more! I was so blown away that I started Googling Gloria and ended up here. From what I gather, the film is representative of the kind of intelligence and originality you've pointed out in the books. Dad was on the one hand panicked, pleading that he HAD to go home with at least $80,000, but he was also bragging that his daughter was "a supermodel." Don't supermodels make a lot more money than that?

A few details: he says he spent $800,000 on the movie. I think that's possible. Between the stock footage, there's a lot of meaningless running back and forth with a lot of people. That all costs money. In the ad materials, the movie is supposed to run 142 minutes, meaning 2 hours and 22 minutes, but it's really just 1 hour and 42 minutes. The irony is that if he lied to make it seem more substantial for AFM, this was a market where they'd much prefer the shorter running time: this isn't a place where people buy epics! Most buyers would reject this just on seeing 142. For those of you dying to see the film, I'm guessing your best shot at that is if Daddy finally decides to try selling the DVDs himself. I can't imagine any legit distributor seriously considering buying it.
 
bobbob said:
Just FYI on the Maradona movie, before the American Film Market opened in Los Angeles, Dad was desperately trying to find a distributor by passing out DVDs, but to no avail. I saw the DVD. It is everything you all imagine and far, far more! I was so blown away that I started Googling Gloria and ended up here. From what I gather, the film is representative of the kind of intelligence and originality you've pointed out in the books. Dad was on the one hand panicked, pleading that he HAD to go home with at least $80,000, but he was also bragging that his daughter was "a supermodel." Don't supermodels make a lot more money than that?

A few details: he says he spent $800,000 on the movie. I think that's possible. Between the stock footage, there's a lot of meaningless running back and forth with a lot of people. That all costs money. In the ad materials, the movie is supposed to run 142 minutes, meaning 2 hours and 22 minutes, but it's really just 1 hour and 42 minutes. The irony is that if he lied to make it seem more substantial for AFM, this was a market where they'd much prefer the shorter running time: this isn't a place where people buy epics! Most buyers would reject this just on seeing 142. For those of you dying to see the film, I'm guessing your best shot at that is if Daddy finally decides to try selling the DVDs himself. I can't imagine any legit distributor seriously considering buying it.
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Bless you, sir, and the info you bring.

I'm kind of upset that Grandpa Tesch failed to find a distributor, but at the same time not surprised at all. He's desperate here, and has a long history of being delusional concerning Maradonia. So despite his desperate need to cover his losses, there's enough misguided pride to keep him from accepting offers he deems to be "shit".

If he did spend that much money on the goddamn thing, then he won't keep it to himself. He simply can't afford that. This is the climax of his epic attempt to make Maradonia a blockbuster, and that will only happen if he gets the movie circulating somehow. Hell, Paranormal Activity got picked up by a major studio after it was released online and generated hype, so the same thing could happen to Maradonia!

I just really want to see this fucking movie.
 
bobbob said:
Just FYI on the Maradona movie, before the American Film Market opened in Los Angeles, Dad was desperately trying to find a distributor by passing out DVDs, but to no avail. I saw the DVD. It is everything you all imagine and far, far more! I was so blown away that I started Googling Gloria and ended up here. From what I gather, the film is representative of the kind of intelligence and originality you've pointed out in the books. Dad was on the one hand panicked, pleading that he HAD to go home with at least $80,000, but he was also bragging that his daughter was "a supermodel." Don't supermodels make a lot more money than that?

A few details: he says he spent $800,000 on the movie. I think that's possible. Between the stock footage, there's a lot of meaningless running back and forth with a lot of people. That all costs money. In the ad materials, the movie is supposed to run 142 minutes, meaning 2 hours and 22 minutes, but it's really just 1 hour and 42 minutes. The irony is that if he lied to make it seem more substantial for AFM, this was a market where they'd much prefer the shorter running time: this isn't a place where people buy epics! Most buyers would reject this just on seeing 142. For those of you dying to see the film, I'm guessing your best shot at that is if Daddy finally decides to try selling the DVDs himself. I can't imagine any legit distributor seriously considering buying it.
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If you still have the DVD, upload that shit!
 
I'd love for everyone to get a look at this and I'm sure it will eventually happen, but to upload would be both illegal and the worst possible breach of professional ethics. Even an uber-douche like Gerry deserves the right to try making back his money. Watching the epic online trailer gives a good sense of the silliness and horrible acting, but only the most obsessed fans will enjoy being subjected to it for over and hour and a half. I think it's correct that he's delusional about the film rather than trying to con people: the sprawling production and special effects clearly took a huge amount of time and effort. Despite an Ed Wood-like knack for story telling, he put in much more time and effort than Ed ever did. To me, that's the part that's fascinating. Perhaps as with Ed Wood and Tim Burton, Gloria's greatest fame will be achieved when the 2030 version of Jennifer Lawrence plays the part of Gloria in a film about the making of Maradonia!
 
I can't see why you believe a man who cons others out of their money has the right to make back his money on something that clearly doesn't anyway unless you're being disingenuous with your information and you don't have a DVD to begin with. Ethics aside I wouldn't be afraid of the legal clout of Team Tesch so I don't find that a valid reason to not upload it either.

Like you say, one way or another we'll all see it and of course it's up to you what you choose to share. I just can't see your reasoning for not uploading it.

I also find it difficult to believe a con man whose house is in foreclosure has the ability to just throw away 800,000 dollars on a movie no matter how confident he is in it.
 
It probably started out as a con, but possibly mutated into something that Daddy Tesch staked all his hopes on. I kinda want to see it cause I'm a sucker for bad movies, but I'm not holding my breath on a release. I wonder if at this point Maradonia is just Gerry's thing, and Gloria's going along with it out of a sense of familial obligation.

EDIT: @Karen Riley, he's a con man as you pointed out. We know there was an issue with him paying the cast and crew, maybe he strung everyone along with promises, and is desperate to sell this albatross for a tidy sum so he doesn't have a legion of pissed-off film cast and crew on his ass. At this point, I truly believe that Daddy Tesch really does think he's sitting on the next Hunger Games. Oh to be there when that bubble of delusion pops.
 
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At this point the best he could do is directly sell burned DVD-Rs a la Cool Cat. If that's the case, he may end up seriously overpricing them. Bad movies can be worth the cost up to a certain point, but if he's trying to sell them for $30-40 each in some attempt to recoup his losses he'll drive away the only people willing to buy in the first place.
 
bobbob said:
I'd love for everyone to get a look at this and I'm sure it will eventually happen, but to upload would be both illegal and the worst possible breach of professional ethics.
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Why yes, true enough, wouldn't be proper at all to distribute the material while there's still (a tiny!) chance that Tesch might find some distribution channel.

But remember that you are in possession of a true cultural gem which must not be let to perish from this Earth. If Tesch is unable to find a distributor, it might end up being your duty to upload it.

Don't let it go the way of The Day the Clown Cried, is what I'm saying.
 
God said:
At this point the best he could do is directly sell burned DVD-Rs a la Cool Cat. If that's the case, he may end up seriously overpricing them. Bad movies can be worth the cost up to a certain point, but if he's trying to sell them for $30-40 each in some attempt to recoup his losses he'll drive away the only people willing to buy in the first place.
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This is probably the way they're going to go. It'll be priced high to begin with, maybe $29.99 but you'll get some cool Maradonia swag like a copy of the script signed by Glo Glo and Herr Tesch. But that's just gravy. We want to see the DVD and I'm saying again I will buy that mofo for $20.00.
 
I'll certainly preserve the DVD for posterity if needed, but I think reality may have set in for Daddy on the lack of studio interest, so I won't be surprised if he starts self-marketing within the year. On trying to pay off angry actors and crew, that depends if you think he's an honest person. My experience is that crooked filmmakers never end up paying those people. If they do find a way to make money on their film, they hide it from the people they owe and keep every penny for themselves.
 
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