💥 Trainwreck Gloria Tesch / Sofia Nova - Author of the Maradonia series turned Republithot

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DykesDykesChina said:
...and for some reason, the movie premiere was accompanied by enthusiastic shouts of "JULAY JULAY JULLLAAAAYYYYYYY" from the audience.
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I was actually thinking that we could all join in on the "Mar-ah-done-ee-ah, Mar-ah-dooooooone-eeeee-aaaaaah!" chorus...
 
Muscle Bra said:
It's kind of a pity that they're probably going to have their premiere in either LA or Florida, while we Kiwis are scattered all throughout the US (and the rest of the world, for that matter). If it wouldn't require a plane flight, I would soo love to get a group together and try to attend the Maradonia premiere...
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I'm guessing Floriduh and tickets are going to be like $50 a piece or some ridiculous sum that will cover their expenses for the night. You will the champagne reception but not the after party as that's for the people involved in the movie and it's all about Glo Glo.

Having said that, assuming I can get the time off, I wouldn't mind going especially if it meant getting my hands on some promotional material or Maradonia swag.
 
DykesDykesChina said:
Anyone else notice that most of the minor characters in the trailer, most of all this "assembly of evil" towards the end, rather resemble the Jersey Shore rejects with whom Gloria apparently prefers to party?
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Well to be fair I think they're on the same level of social strata. Glo Glo and her family however want to aim higher and pretend like they have more.
 
DykesDykesChina said:
Anyone else notice that most of the minor characters in the trailer, most of all this "assembly of evil" towards the end, rather resemble the Jersey Shore rejects with whom Gloria apparently prefers to party?
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To be fair, acting in a no-budget fantasy movie on a shitload of drugs sounds like a hell of a way to spend a weekend.
 
Papa Tesch said:
the American Film Market in California.
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He says this as if there is a physical storefront for which you take your completed movie to called The American Film Market to sell it. It's like a Farmer's Market, but for movies. This is amusing me to no end. I know that's not what he meant, but it is just as overly optimistic silly as his actual plan.
 
Phil Ken Sebben said:
Actually, the response he sent said that he was going to send it to Hollywood and shop around for a distributor. The complete response he sent is:
So there you go, it doesn't mean he's any less delusional but he does believe that he's going through all the right steps. Problem is he's going to be in for a rude surprise when he gets there and finds out that it's not the billion dollar franchise that he's been salivating about for the longest time.

As I said near the start of all this what I see happening is they will finally get a direct to DVD thing set up as that's going to be the only people willing to put any kind of money into this. They will however rent out a theatre for the night, have a gala premiere complete with red carpet and champagne reception. Followed by a showing of the movie and then the after party at some banquet hall they rented for the night. And that's going to be it because nobody in their right mind wants to see another 7 Maradonia movies because nobody involved can act, direct or do principal cinematography.

The Tesches will then move onto the next phase of their plan to pimp out Glo Glo in some other market to make the millions of dollars they want or they'll just go back to grifting.
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Oh, this is comedy gold! So Gerry is coming out and spent a minimum of $250 (and probably more because that's the cost for only a single day pass) to shop this tragedy around?! I'm going to have to check the screening list, this might be worth a trip out to Santa Monica!
 
There's no way in hell this gets a theatrical release. Also, Dr. Tesch has no idea how the film industry works. Theactrical releases are planned months or years in advance. Even if the movie was good, it wouldn't be released in November. The Tesches are setting themselves up for a major disappointment and they wasted money that probably wasn't theirs to begin with.
 
Phil Ken Sebben said:
You will the champagne reception but not the after party as that's for the people involved in the movie and it's all about Glo Glo.
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We just need one kiwi with an armani suit jacket and fake omega watch to rent a bmw and tell people he's a facebook billionare and bam... we got a man on the inside.
 
ChuckSlaughter said:
We just need one kiwi with an armani suit jacket and fake omega watch to rent a bmw and tell people he's a facebook billionare and bam... we got a man on the inside.
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I can see it now. A representative of Kiwi Distributing shows up, schmoozes the Tesches and complements Glo Glo on her movie and would like to distribute it. Of course they'll pull out all the stops including inviting him to the after party.

The downside to all this is you will have Glo Glo all over you for the night. Any Kiwi willing to take one for the team?
 
Phil Ken Sebben said:
A representative of Kiwi Distributing shows up, schmoozes the Tesches and complements Glo Glo on her movie and would like to distribute it ... Any Kiwi willing to take one for the team?
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Are you kidding? The entertainment value would be through the roof. If we could set up a gofundme or something to help cover my travel costs, I'd do it in a heartbeat.

And, at the risk of powerleveling, I don't work in Hollywood or anything, but I could certainly talk the talk of business, contracts, distribution, etc.
 
I really think this is going to be a whole The Room thing where the Pa Tesch forks out money to a cinema willing to rent a screen for the night, hires limos and a red carpet, gives a heartfelt speech about the making of the movie, watches the screening and then goes to an afterparty where they paid for some cheap champagne (cash bar, of course) at some ritzy venue.

It's going to be an imitation of a real premiere. Real ones aren't even that fun, they're pretty much exactly what I just described only with a higher budget and legitimate actors. Anyone can imitate that with enough money. Doesn't mean you've succeeded in anything.

I get the whole acting/film making dream. I used to be an actor in the sense that I auditioned, I sometimes booked jobs and I was paid to act. Filming can be an amazing experience where you feel like the cast and crew are your family and you're all pitching in to make something incredible, something you're proud to have been a part of. I just don't get buying it and acting as if you earned it through talent and hard work. Gloria hasn't paid her dues as an actor or film maker or writer. I'm just glad that the movie Pa paid for her to star in won't allow her entry into any legitimate actor's guilds or unions, although technically there are ways to buy your way into that too (Tommy Wiseau did).


Having said that, I am going to watch the shit out of this movie when it goes to DVD.
 
Whatever happens....we NEED to get ourselves a copy of the film somehow and spread it to every corner of the internet. Torrent it, buy it, steal it...fck it. JUST GET OUR HANDS ON IT!
 
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