Crime Florida man tries robbing Publix with stapler

(source) / (archive)
A Florida man is behind bars after he tried to rob a Publix in Miami with a stapler.
Patrick Abbott, 31, entered the Publix on Biscayne Boulevard, gave an employee a note stating he had a gun, and told her to put money in a bag.
After the employee read the note, she pretended to help one of her co-workers and called for help, according to NBC affiliate WFLA.
Abbott left Publix empty-handed and was caught by Miami Police while throwing the note away.

The gun he claimed to have turned out to be a black stapler, according to police.
He’s facing charges of armed robbery.

 

[XYZpdq Jr.]

When you gotta have a tendies sub.

 

[Rozzy]

Stapler amnesty when?

 

[W00K #17]

When you gotta have a tendies sub.

Clicked thread specifically to make this joke.

 

[TowinKarz]

"The gun he claimed to have turned out to be a black stapler, according to police."

Man, what would've happened if he'd brought the RED stapler?

 

[BelUwUga]

Stapler amnesty when?

Free Tyrell!

 

[The handsome tard]

I was told there would be free tendies

 

[Strange Wilderness]

Uncensored footage of the incident:

Spoiler

 

[TowinKarz]

Please don't waste those

 

[Lord of the Large Pants]

Was it a high capacity black assault stapler?

 

[Pixy]

Fake it til you make it!

 

[Coldgrip]

We need common sense stapler laws.

 

[The Last Stand]

That's the face of somebody that gave up or doesn't care.

 

[Breadbassket]

We need common sense stapler laws.

Limit every stapler to only being allowed to have one staple ready to be used at any given time. If you want more you will have to open it and put in additional staples.

This is the only way to protect society from military grade assault staplers.

 

[Vesperus]

Was it a high capacity black assault stapler?

It was the pistol grip that did it, I reckon.

That and the bayonet lug.

 

[William Tyndale]

I once stapled a classmate’s pants to his ass, so it def could be considered a deadly weapon.

 

[WonderWino]

Stapler you say? At least he didn't tie up the staff and do this