🐟 Fishtank Fishtank.Live General - Jet Neptune's Pisces Aquarium Internet Reality Show w/ Host Bam Margera

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With a (questionable) W from James Drake, how would you rate season 5 of Fishtank?

  • 1 Star — Absolute disaster. Unwatchable, boring, production fucked it up bad, the fish were lame

    Votes: 64 8.0%
  • 2 Stars — Pretty bad. Some funny moments, dragged, too many vibe repair days. Barely worth checking.

    Votes: 93 11.6%
  • 3 Stars — Average. Solid entertainment in spots, some good chaos and crashouts, but nothing special

    Votes: 183 22.7%
  • 4 Stars — Really good. Lots of hilarious moments, strong fish personalities, solid content and vibes

    Votes: 414 51.4%
  • 5 Stars — Peak Fishtank / Masterpiece. Non-stop insanity, legendary fish and production, pure chaos

    Votes: 51 6.3%

  • Total voters
    805
If you're this suicidal you should speak with somebody.

Considering how they've used her so far, it's happening bud.
In minecraft of course! Honestly I wouldn't put it past them to not even have a creative workaround to Josie's lack of stage presence. Josie fans will reward Jet for giving her more screentime regardless of what that screentime entails.
 
I don't usually like to suck off Sam Hyde but the HD cam footage does a fantastic job at showcasing how Sam utterly dominates the energy and commands the entire room as the overbearing and frenetic Goldstriker persona. Frankly, besides Ben, Sam is one of the only good performances from any member of the Production staff that doesn't seem like intentional sabotage.

The amount of tension in the HD footage where the fish seem like deer stuck in headlights or broken down Guantanamo Bay torture prisoners just because Sam is there as Goldstriker is palpable. You can almost taste it in these early days of the show. Live in 420p they looked like normal people just paying attention (well as normal as a group of zoomer autists can be).

Meanwhile Josie is smiling like an insane person at everything Sam does.

I'm actually very impressed with the interview segments too.

EDIT: IMO, The problem with Simmons' reaction to the booting and the book in general was he immediately reverted to Asian Male Stoicism at a time where an emotional reaction was needed if he was actually going to downplay what the accusations were saying. Him still doing that in the basement before Sam started rambling about hackers in the extras video looks even weirder to an outside observer.
 
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I'm sure it's been said before, but these episodes really lack a lot of context for major things. I've been watching them with someone who hasn't seen any fishtank before this and I have to keep pausing and explaining shit that happened that wasn't shown.
 
EDIT: IMO, The problem with Simmons' reaction to the booting and the book in general was he immediately reverted to Asian Male Stoicism at a time where an emotional reaction was needed if he was actually going to downplay what the accusations were saying. Him still doing that in the basement before Sam started rambling about hackers in the extras video looks even weirder to an outside observer.
How would you have reacted if you were Simmons? You are in a house with a 6'7" madman and people start accusing you of being a pedophile. What would you say to try and change their minds?
 
How would you have reacted if you were Simmons? You are in a house with a 6'7" madman and people start accusing you of being a pedophile. What would you say to try and change their minds?
I do feel bad for Simmons and agree with your posts that he's been sort of railroaded, but I'd expect someone wholly innocent of pedophilia to deny it loudly and vehemently.
 
I'm sure it's been said before, but these episodes really lack a lot of context for major things. I've been watching them with someone who hasn't seen any fishtank before this and I have to keep pausing and explaining shit that happened that wasn't shown.
Jet allegedly spent the rest of this year editing footage. I'm not sure what he actually did during that time but what we ended up with is below film school level. It comes off as if nobody took any notes during the production process so that a narrative could be constructed later around what was being filmed. If you weren't watching the live stream you have & will forever have zero context for what's going on. Then they insist on selling this garbage as if they weren't charging ridiculous prices for TTS or handing one of the actors stuffies. The money-grubbing is shameless even for a Sam Hyde thing.
 
How would you have reacted if you were Simmons? You are in a house with a 6'7" madman and people start accusing you of being a pedophile. What would you say to try and change their minds?

I do feel bad for Simmons and agree with your posts that he's been sort of railroaded, but I'd expect someone wholly innocent of pedophilia to deny it loudly and vehemently.
Correct me if I'm wrong but he's a Chinese born immigrant right? Assuming that cultural taboos are different in this case, I'm not so sure he'd even be aware of how vehemently opposed to pedophilia the west is.
 
How would you have reacted if you were Simmons? You are in a house with a 6'7" madman and people start accusing you of being a pedophile. What would you say to try and change their minds?
Idk... how about anything? I don't know how well it would be for deflecting accusations but something in that situation is infinitely better than saying nothing while also seeming super coy about it. If I imply I like America as much as Simmons does how am I suppose to stay here and realize my dream of cleaning 10 celebrity houses if I'm getting deported over a stink kicked up because I went on a reality show and stonewalled all questions about weird shit in my books.

Also I get the whole cultural differences thing people use for Simmons, but one of his other books that actually seems like he wrote it definitely mentioned a lot about how being a foreign counselor you need to study up on the countries morals.
 
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Jet allegedly spent the rest of this year editing footage. I'm not sure what he actually did during that time but what we ended up with is below film school level. It comes off as if nobody took any notes during the production process so that a narrative could be constructed later around what was being filmed. If you weren't watching the live stream you have & will forever have zero context for what's going on. Then they insist on selling this garbage as if they weren't charging ridiculous prices for TTS or handing one of the actors stuffies. The money-grubbing is shameless even for a Sam Hyde thing.
They aren't selling these episodes.
 
They aren't selling these episodes.
Are they not selling the episodes to anyone who didn't pay $40 before the show started?
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Sam liked this low effort video Tyler/Froggy Fresh posted mocking Andrew Tate while wearing Teddy Fresh clothes. I don’t know if the clothes are a dig at Tate since he and Ethan Klein had a feud or what’s going on there.

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Jon is coping:
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I’m assuming based off Sylvia’s deleted tweets about Jon unfollowing her and the things she revealed that Jon said about her along with the Letty tweet calling him out Tyler had seen/heard enough of the Top G like a lot of others he’s been collabing with. I noticed Sam isn’t liking Jon’s tweets anymore either.
 
It's really cool that Jet took Sam's idea of Hell House and made it work, but damn if he isn't an odd duck in this. You could make an entire thread of the wacky shit from /r9k/. Sadly he's one of the most likable of Sam's employees.
 
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I noticed Sam isn’t liking Jon’s tweets anymore either.
Sam's dynamic with the fish is interesting, because none of them has any shot at an entertainment career going forward without his connections, and I think all of them understand that but Jon. But he's digging a hole for himself, I think he doesn't understand that. Sam is the Godfather, Letty is his dawtuh. He might have been fooled by the aggression towards Letty at times but he does not understand that he is not the favorite son, by a long shot. He can burn his bridge with Letty right up until it's bad enough to tick Sam off, and then he's fucking dead and nobody will buy another thing off his shitty merch store. Which has new items:
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They all suck!
 
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It's almost brutal that her introduction speech is about her talking more and opening up when that doesn't describe her arc at all.
honestly if this was a daily recap or happening during the season (like Big Brother) i'd be more forgiving but its more like the amazing race where they have all the footage before the season begins and is known for great editing because of it. Its also why it takes them months after the race is over before its thrown up for viewers. How the fuck does someone who knows how the entire show went leave something so bullshit in.
o not even have a creative workaround to Josie's lack of stage presence
the idea should have been to keep her and the bed guy as far away from the rest of the cast in the episodes as possible, make it almost a joke into itself. You can cut away to them in their rooms doing their own thing but make them almost like joke minor characters. Its a common and beloved trope, like when the rock in spongebob won the snail race or pud'n winning the go kart race in billy&mandy. Some minor character the audience didn't have the focus on winning the competition. Especially if its truely Letty's story it would be a great rugpull moment. she's suffering throughout while those two are just in their rooms the entire time. even lie in the edit and make it seem like they were in their rooms until the very end if you have to. Especially if you're going for comedy having the freeloaders ganging up on letty and cutting to Josie in her room alone with her pushies would be a great moment.
before this and I have to keep pausing and explaining shit that happened that wasn't shown.
This is why they should have had an omniscient narrator. that old reality show solitary did that which combined with the format basically meant they could piece together the entire show from footage of contest's meaningless boredom. Especially for a "comedy" reality show it would fit, same with adding more cheesy sound effects to stuff, maybe its a former cable reality show addiction but for a cheap ass show they aren't using any of the stock tropes that make this shit good. Just imagine how easy it would be to get Sam narrating or Nick giving "commentary" that could explain the shit that wasn't shown or at least give a funny excuse for why its not shown on screen. you could even add reoccuring jokes from that. "hey i wonder what Vance is doing during all this?" and every episode is him in cricket chirping silence reading in bed.

IIRC impractical jokers did this in the first season when they couldn't have one of them there because they were still working jobs or just straight up didn't get good footage, you'd have to be a fucking idiot to think Sal didn't do the challenge because of a bad horoscope or joker v joker challenges were something planned beforehand. Q even complained a bit about them adding sound effects and other bullshit early on but got over it.

Also agree about needing an opening. Something like a one minute intro from striker would add to it, then you get into the opening.
Jet allegedly spent the rest of this year editing footage. I'm not sure what he actually did during that time but what we ended up with is below film school level.
Which is why i pointed out how it feels like bullshit that he's the editor sam "hired" as if somehow not a single film school graduate of the last decade has the same tastes as Art school Sam Hyde or at least wouldn't care about politics enough to work on his shit. I know at least 3 local 700 union card carrying editors with reality show experience who could have edited this of course Sam might have had to pay their minimum but its obvious when you have someone who's done this shit before vs a literal amateur. As Nick would have told him about houses, you can tell when its some illegal vs a contractor with credentials. Like editing, plumbers and electricans aren't something you should be hiring some guy standing outside of home depot to try out. At minimum the turn around time on editing certainly wouldnt be so fucking slow.
 
Jet could just read this thread for season 1 lore.

There is a TV series here - like something they could actually sell outside of their own site (not Netflix or anything but license to a smaller service). Episode 3 showed this the most, maybe they could go back and fix 1/2 to include actual context and put the "bonus footage" in the actual show.

I hope they don't rush through the back half because some of it's not in HD or whatever.
 
just imagine how easy it would be to get Sam narrating or Nick giving "commentary"
I don't typically give accolades to kiwi users but if they were to get a commentator to narrate play-by-plays in the show then they should hire @Punitive Castration at least. Their live commentary in sneedchat made the show 1000% more watchable.
I'm not sure what he actually did during that time but what we ended up with is below film school level
My money is on that he didn't do anything and he's just slapping all of this together last minute. The first two episodes were more like a home movie than an actual show. He's not finished and I wouldn't be surprised if he's still working on the next episode to be released as we speak. It's just so telling that he commented on ep 3's quality being bumped up because of complaints about episode 1 and 2. I guarantee you if nobody complained then episode 3 would have carried on with the same level of editing as the first 2 eps.
 
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