Fanfiction Horrors

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Approx. 59 Robins said:
If half the results aren't questionably legal smutfics loaded with tags that make you question if teaching the masses to read and write was a good idea, is it REALLY AO3?
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I mean yeah, since on occasion AO3 has some honestly good stuff like the Paper Crown fanfic @fishercat posted. With such lovely lines like
"From what he could tell, the kid didn’t even speak English; the novel he’d been so absorbed in was printed entirely in Japanese and, if he was correct, the “Ciao. S-sono Haru-Giorno e penso di essere tuo figlio” from earlier was Australian. Not that Dio spoke Australian, mind you, but he had enough experience with Europeans to differentiate that backwards down-under speak from more sophisticated tongues.

If he ever saw that oriental prostitute again, the vampire swore he’d punish her with a long, strung-out death for teaching his son such a vulgar language."

“Well, Ms. Madonna across the hall better say her prayers because I’ll make her feel like a virgin next time we fuck.”

"There’s a saying. Kira couldn’t quite remember how it went ,but the basic gist of it was that children are the future and need to be protected and nurtured because they personify hope and their childish dreams would someday be reality.

Kira was convinced that the phrase must have originated from Oscar Wilde because it’s verifiable bullshit.

Children don’t need to be protected because they’re the future. Children need to be protected because they’re really fucking stupid."

and my favorite description of king crimson:

"Imagine being 19-something-years-old, already diagnosed as ‘crazy’ by most in the medical community and trying to put together a gang, when, all the sudden, your watch starts skipping, and this raging face stapled to the front of a humanoid pink dildo shows up and starts ‘grrrrr’ing at life as a whole and no one can see it but you. Imagine waking up to a pair of white dress shoes from Versace’s 1980 Spring Collection capping off two well-sculpted legs in fishnets and moving your gaze upward to find, not a Barcelona soccer player, but a grown-ass fetish freak in an oversized diaper grimacing into the horizon like he was perpetually trying to squeeze out a thick one."
 
THOTHunterAlice said:
I mean yeah, since on occasion AO3 has some honestly good stuff like the Paper Crown fanfic @fishercat posted. With such lovely lines like
"From what he could tell, the kid didn’t even speak English; the novel he’d been so absorbed in was printed entirely in Japanese and, if he was correct, the “Ciao. S-sono Haru-Giorno e penso di essere tuo figlio” from earlier was Australian. Not that Dio spoke Australian, mind you, but he had enough experience with Europeans to differentiate that backwards down-under speak from more sophisticated tongues.

If he ever saw that oriental prostitute again, the vampire swore he’d punish her with a long, strung-out death for teaching his son such a vulgar language."

“Well, Ms. Madonna across the hall better say her prayers because I’ll make her feel like a virgin next time we fuck.”

"There’s a saying. Kira couldn’t quite remember how it went ,but the basic gist of it was that children are the future and need to be protected and nurtured because they personify hope and their childish dreams would someday be reality.

Kira was convinced that the phrase must have originated from Oscar Wilde because it’s verifiable bullshit.

Children don’t need to be protected because they’re the future. Children need to be protected because they’re really fucking stupid."

and my favorite description of king crimson:

"Imagine being 19-something-years-old, already diagnosed as ‘crazy’ by most in the medical community and trying to put together a gang, when, all the sudden, your watch starts skipping, and this raging face stapled to the front of a humanoid pink dildo shows up and starts ‘grrrrr’ing at life as a whole and no one can see it but you. Imagine waking up to a pair of white dress shoes from Versace’s 1980 Spring Collection capping off two well-sculpted legs in fishnets and moving your gaze upward to find, not a Barcelona soccer player, but a grown-ass fetish freak in an oversized diaper grimacing into the horizon like he was perpetually trying to squeeze out a thick one."
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Fuck you. Fuck you for making me laugh so hard at something as stupid as this. God dammit.
 
Cruelty to plants
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Fic
Archive

The Mayhem tag is full of Dead/Euronymous smut.
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Link to fic
 
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This one alone is 23,000 words. Twenty-three thousand words that could've been used to type anything else.
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Relative to the one posted above, this one is pretty tame. Though, that is relatively speaking - it's still fucking bizarre, going by the tags.

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When I think of TF2, the first thing that comes to mind doesn't tend to be BDSM or bloodplay, but maybe I'm just an uncultured philistine. Maybe.

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This one doesn't even seem that out of the ordinary (It's just regular old run-of-the-mill gay smut) - I just thought it was a bit weird, so I might as well post it.

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The person who wrote this is not the messiah an author, they're a very naughty boy! (Seriously though, Monty Python smut? It's very tame smut, but still)

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I don't know who exactly watches a British motoring show hosted by three middle-aged men, and thinks "GOD I WANT THEM TO FUCK", but apparently at least one person like that exists, so...

However, while gathering the TF2 Smut mentioned above, I noticed there was a fuck ton of autistic Smash fanfics. Nothing worth making note of, but still autistic. I henceforth decided to go and look at several Nintendo fanfics to try and find more trash to post.

That was a mistake.

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The author of this not only thought it was a good idea, and not only thought it was worth sharing with the world for all to see, they decided they HAD to make another one.

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I'm posting this one mostly because it's 45,000 words. That's around half of a regular published novel. Solely dedicated to Luigi smut. Is this amount of words normal for this?

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There's nothing really to say about this affront to Allah, other than the fact that it's pedo shit, and the person who wrote it should be on several watchlists.

For reference, I didn't read any of the fics posted, purely because I value both my time and my sanity.
 
Is anyone in the mood for a Danganronpa adaption of Charlie and the Chocolate Factory? This 7-part story, from DA out of all places, (but it's probably fitting considering the content) features some of the DR1 and DR2 cast touring the factory, with Junko as Willy Wonka, and Monokumas as the Oompa-Loompas. And one-by-one, the students get fattened up (and that's a massive understatement) in extremely disturbing ways as punishment for breaking the factory rules, while the Oompa-Loompas sing demented songs as the students get fattened up.

Chapter 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5 - 6 - 7

And speaking of DR fanfics, aside from the infamous Ouma piss fic that was mentioned many many pages ago, what were some other notably depraved stories to come out of that rabbit hole that is the DR fandom?
 
Thiletonomics said:
Is anyone in the mood for a Danganronpa adaption of Charlie and the Chocolate Factory? This 7-part story, from DA out of all places, (but it's probably fitting considering the content) features some of the DR1 and DR2 cast touring the factory, with Junko as Willy Wonka, and Monokumas as the Oompa-Loompas. And one-by-one, the students get fattened up (and that's a massive understatement) in extremely disturbing ways as punishment for breaking the factory rules, while the Oompa-Loompas sing demented songs as the students get fattened up.

Chapter 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5 - 6 - 7

And speaking of DR fanfics, aside from the infamous Ouma piss fic that was mentioned many many pages ago, what were some other notably depraved stories to come out of that rabbit hole that is the DR fandom?
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I mentioned a DR diaper fic earlier, does that count?

Also, that fic you just mentioned looks tame in comparison to the DR-related horrors I had to sit through.
 
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