Fanfiction Horrors

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What I like to do is to filter 100,000+ stories and sort by favorite. Then I go to the very last page to get favorites in reverse order.

Sees pathetic people write on and on forever without an interesting bone in their body getting next to no attention.

I don't actually read the stories. I just aristocratically stare down at the pitiful fruits of their labor.
 
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Full disclosure: I'm friends with a mod on a now crumbling fanfic archive. As such, I'm usually the mule they test out bad fanfic reactions on, so I've seen some rather...uh..."interesting" things.

In no particular order, here's my contribution of eyebleeds:

The infamous Hitler/Jesus trollfic. This is EXACTLY what it sounds like. Hitler and Jesus form a romantic relationship (somehow in the year 2025), have bad sex, bad characterization, and is generally a gut-buster all around, including bad disclaimers.

The Optimus Prime/R2D2/Princess Leia trollfic. I did a dramatic reading of this to my roommate in college and she promptly stopped me halfway through. Optimus Prime and Star Wars company are trapped as prisoners and are part of some sex show run by Jabba the Hutt. Highlights include Optimus Prime fucking Leia with no matters to size, and R2D2 being used as a literal "magic bullet" up Optimus Prime's ass, where he sees a portrait gallery.

The Slutification of Seras. I normally wouldn't link this here, as it's just bad porn, but the kicker here is that the author a) runs a Hellsing fanfiction review archive on Tumblr, and b) often posts anti-rape/anti-exploitation things on his personal Tumblr. Which makes me go "???" in trying to figure out his motives and whether his morals go out the window when his masturbation fantasies are involved.

And finally, what is a badfic list without the obligatory MLP crossover? Street Fighter: Gem Pony is...um...one of the more cringe-worthy ones. At first I thought it was a troll, but it's too consistent. Rarity forms a romantic relationship with Vega/Claw and...the matador does the pony (and has a threesome with Chun-Li, of course). Featuring bad characterization and the author believing that pony vaginas are "tight" and "small."
 
Thanks to Brendaniel I discovered a fic that definitely belongs here: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/9532463/1/Sonic-s-Ultimate-Harem

Two hundred chapters (so far) of Sonic travelling to different universes fucking every woman he comes across. Just the premise alone is bad enough, but actually reading it is a hell of an experience. Sonic's somehow made into even more of a Sue than usual, the sex scenes are utterly cringe-worthy and apparently Sonic doesn't give a flying fuck about respecting privacy because he's casually telling all this shit to Mario. Everything about this fic just screams autism. And yet somehow it's got over a hundred favourites.

Looks like I searched for this one just in time because the 200th chapter is the one where he finally crosses over with MLP, and hilariously this is where the reviewers are drawing a line. Apparently Sonic sleeping with a bunch of human women, including some who are underage, is fine, but as soon as a pony's inrtoduced it becomes fucked up.
 
So no clue if he's been mentioned here before, but if you wanna see a Dobsonesque fanfic writer, look up Perfect Lionheart.

This guy has written some right doorstoppers,with the two that come most to mind being Chunin Exam Day, a 340,000+ 77 chapter nightmare of a Naruto story, and it's evil nastier brother Partially Kissed Hero, a 100+ chapter travesty of a Harry Potter fic. He notably shows disdain for the respective media and writers, writes women like spineless whores unless he doesn't likethem, actively writes characters he doesn't like to be the most vile people to ever live, and ironically writes the protagonist of each series in such a way that makes them look way worse than the cartoonishly evil bad guys he tries to make us hate. Funnily enough, you get the vibe he vicariously lives through the protagonist too.

Winning moments in Chunin Exam Day include repeated geldings of a character he doesn't like for multiple chapters, harem style situations including underaged sex and pederasty, women desiring marriage over massages given by the main character, repeated mutilations of another character he doesn't like by the protagonist's hands, a tard out by the author himself in one of the chapters when he tried to ragequit the story, repeated longwinded bitchfits made over the few people who call out his story for being the dreck it is.

Partially Kissed Hero includes a plot device that intentionally makes it so that the villain can live as long as the author wants in spite of being far shittier than the protagonist, repeated emasculations as well, and again the protagonist being a loathsome cunt with a harem of easily controlled spineless bitches.

The author is lulzy too. He regularly insults the writers of the original work, tries to pretend he respects women when he treats them like toys in his stories, tardrages when he recieves even a single bit of criticism, and intentionally stretches out his story to punish those who don't accept it.
 
 
Hey farms senior citizens, remember any of the old classics? They're burned eternally into my memory!

Chibi-usa's 7th Birthday? (The moving introduction is the best part.)
http://www.angelfire.com/geek/papirini/kousagi/badfic/oneshot/chibi7.txt

Countess Chronicles? (Nightmare fuel.)
http://www.tuxedojack.com/godawful/nauseating/crystalknight/couchp.txt

Or my all-time favorite, California Dreaming? (I used to do dramatic readings for my friends. Shall we kill them now? No, let's fuck them first!)
http://archives.eyrie.org/anime/Sailor-Moon/Lemon/sm.lemon.california-dreaming.gz

(I don't know why they all start with C.)

For recent stuff, I read one where Hol Horse fucks his gun. Yes. I thought it was on AO3 but I can't find it now...

....however, while looking for the link for that one, I found one with Hol Horse and Boingo and Vore. That'll do, pig.
http://archiveofourown.org/works/4801694
 
Adamska said:
Winning moments in Chunin Exam Day include repeated geldings of a character he doesn't like for multiple chapters, harem style situations including underaged sex and pederasty, women desiring marriage over massages given by the main character, repeated mutilations of another character he doesn't like by the protagonist's hands, a tard out by the author himself in one of the chapters when he tried to ragequit the story, repeated longwinded bitchfits made over the few people who call out his story for being the dreck it is.
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The author is lulzy too. He regularly insults the writers of the original work, tries to pretend he respects women when he treats them like toys in his stories, tardrages when he recieves even a single bit of criticism, and intentionally stretches out his story to punish those who don't accept it.
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This was one of the first fanfictions I've come across, before I was into badfics. I quit when reading it when smashing a girl's head in was treated as something laudable and moral by other characters, because she wasn't consider fuckworthy by the author at the time. Since then, I've read hundreds of stories with autism, sexism, stupidness, edgelordness, pretentious, vapidness, selfcenterness, degrading, fetishishic, gore, derailment, OCC, genital confusion, bad pacing, and several tomes worth of shear attention seeking. I look upon many of the stories in this thread with utter indifference, but Chunnin Exam Day is the one that stands apart as never elsewhere have I've seen something that was so clearly the product of true evil.
 
Archive of Our Own has some true horrors in the form of written child porn. Which involves babies more than you think (I found a lovely piece where the actors and characters from Supernatural screw a baby and no it was not a troll). Images are not allowed, thank god, but apparently thousands of words about babies, toddlers and children 'consenting' to sexual activity is okay. One of their official tags is 'extremely underage'.
 
Old Blighty said:
Archive of Our Own has some true horrors in the form of written child porn. Which involves babies more than you think (I found a lovely piece where the actors and characters from Supernatural screw a baby and no it was not a troll). Images are not allowed, thank god, but apparently thousands of words about babies, toddlers and children 'consenting' to sexual activity is okay. One of their official tags is 'extremely underage'.
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I read a particularly bad shota Kuroshitsuji one recently, with that "children can totally consent" thing happening....I'm pretty sure it even had the classic "this is how I deal" intro....but I mean it is Kuroshit so what did I expect.
 
The politicization of fetish porn on Archive of Our Own is... strange, to say the least. Fucking children? Cool. Murder and cannibalism? Great! Rough sex without informed consent? YOU DISGUSTING PIECE OF SHIT
 
Alberto Balsalm said:
The politicization of fetish porn on Archive of Our Own is... strange, to say the least. Fucking children? Cool. Murder and cannibalism? Great! Rough sex without informed consent? YOU DISGUSTING PIECE OF SHIT
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This sounds like isolated incidents of people wandering outside their comfort zone. I don't think there's enough interaction on AoOO to there to be politics. It's mostly anonymous kudos(likes) follow by user kudos on most stories. The comments tend to be along the lines of "good job".
 
NeverHappened said:
This sounds like isolated incidents of people wandering outside their comfort zone. I don't think there's enough interaction on AoOO to there to be politics. It's mostly anonymous kudos(likes) follow by user kudos on most stories. The comments tend to be along the lines of "good job".
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Yeah, I should've been more specific. It's mostly the parts that have a significant intersection with Tumblr that set up these terribly lopsided standards as to which fetishes are disgusting and unspeakable. It's why you get bizarre caveats like "he consented to being cut up and eaten"
and "he fucked a little girl (but I swear I was molested so it's ok)". Also a bunch of trans fetish porn by people who consider themselves moral paragons for not saying "shemale".
 
Okay, my apologies for double posting, but I had to share this monstrosity that I found. It's an Attack on Titan Omegaverse fic, and it is a pretty good example of why the Omegaverse is the worst fanfiction thing ever created.

Seriously, it's like some horrific combination of mpreg, bestiality, and yaoi.

"Fill me again with your potent seed! Fuck your seed into me! Make me carry your giant babies! Tear me apart with your procreation wand!"

"For he never knew," she said, aloud, "that as trees and stars and rain grow and fall, as the seasons pummel over one another in an endless cycle - as baby birds fall from trees, hoping they'll learn to fly - and men are born and raised by dirt and groan - as the earth churns side by side sun by moon, each day passes, millennium in the heart's of the men of children - for through all of this, he never knew that what makes an alpha, what makes a true, genuine, alpha - was never in the movement of the plates beneath our feet, never in the swift and rough gravel of the Earth, but in the light air of the twilight of the moon at dusk, the breeze that lifts the stray strands of our hairs and whispers in our ears: for tomorrow will come, my child - for tomorrow, we will cum."

"Haven't I done everything a good omega is meant to do?" His voice shook. "I took you and your manly hardness inside my small pucker hole, and now I carry your seed within me. Isn't this what a good omega does? What did I do wrong, that we now have to choose between my life and your offsprings?"
 
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