Vect
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Dec 14, 2020
I've seen this lady on and off for around eight years. Just a Youtube curiosity, I thought, a harmless being, struggling and in denial with her condition and coping with Youtube videos - to understandable public concern, and an interesting case of mental illness vs. public platform, but otherwise a drop in the ocean. Live and let live, one of the Internet's little mysteries. Then I catch up on Null's streams, and in that inimitable way that he does, he casts the veil aside with the phrase, 'Holocaust fetish'. Ah, the fun we have!
It's tempting to default to the adage that all Internet people are self-aware grifters, but I think her willingness to discuss uncomfortable controversy, consistent childlike interests and dress sense and caginess about sexual content is believable if she really is a sheltered, mentally arrested 28 year old that has grown up feeling that her body is normal and told constantly that it isn't. Apparently, if anorexia isn't overcome by the end of puberty, it becomes impossible to manage as the body's metabolism settles - after so much time, her body is literally stuck this way, likely underdeveloped and with a poor sex drive. So I can understand, like some people here have said, wanting to escape and regress to living a childhood she might actually have trapped herself in.
Maybe I'm not blackpilled enough, but given that she understands her body is abnormal in an abstract way and has to keep acknowledging she doesn't want people to be like her, I get the feeling she dresses up for self-affirmation, like a child's understanding of body positivity, a first dabbling with clothes and fashion, as opposed to, say, Belle Delphine, who is going for very calculated image. It also makes no sense if she's gone to the effort to be subtle with the struggle fetish but so blatant with the outfits.
Her beach video stands out because all her other videos are fairly well trimmed down to essentials, especially compared to her mall trip. Even if it's vacuous, she generally has something to say or do. But here, it's like she has no idea why she's there. She goes to the beach on a day that's rained, carrying heavy bags of 'beach stuff'. The camera follows her on the long, awkward walk down the carpark and then proceeds to act like it's her first time on Earth. She figures out the sand is wet (cleverly deducing it the result of the rain), declares she'll stay there the whole day, struggles for minutes to lay out a chair, towels, pump up the floats (which she doesn't use) and then fails at blowing bubbles. She T poses her way to the water, shivering, figures out how to load the water gun (doesn't fire it) finds some shit on the ground and calls it a day. She wasn't there for even half an hour. It's like somebody promised her (or her mother) cash if she went to the beach in her trademark bare midriff and let everything take care of itself.
Honesty, her bafflement at people's perception of her as a fetish grifter not to mention general ditziness seems sincere. I don't think it's impossible that she is not emotionally mature enough to recognise that people might be taking advantage of her sexually. I don't know if thats better or worse.
It's tempting to default to the adage that all Internet people are self-aware grifters, but I think her willingness to discuss uncomfortable controversy, consistent childlike interests and dress sense and caginess about sexual content is believable if she really is a sheltered, mentally arrested 28 year old that has grown up feeling that her body is normal and told constantly that it isn't. Apparently, if anorexia isn't overcome by the end of puberty, it becomes impossible to manage as the body's metabolism settles - after so much time, her body is literally stuck this way, likely underdeveloped and with a poor sex drive. So I can understand, like some people here have said, wanting to escape and regress to living a childhood she might actually have trapped herself in.
Maybe I'm not blackpilled enough, but given that she understands her body is abnormal in an abstract way and has to keep acknowledging she doesn't want people to be like her, I get the feeling she dresses up for self-affirmation, like a child's understanding of body positivity, a first dabbling with clothes and fashion, as opposed to, say, Belle Delphine, who is going for very calculated image. It also makes no sense if she's gone to the effort to be subtle with the struggle fetish but so blatant with the outfits.
Her beach video stands out because all her other videos are fairly well trimmed down to essentials, especially compared to her mall trip. Even if it's vacuous, she generally has something to say or do. But here, it's like she has no idea why she's there. She goes to the beach on a day that's rained, carrying heavy bags of 'beach stuff'. The camera follows her on the long, awkward walk down the carpark and then proceeds to act like it's her first time on Earth. She figures out the sand is wet (cleverly deducing it the result of the rain), declares she'll stay there the whole day, struggles for minutes to lay out a chair, towels, pump up the floats (which she doesn't use) and then fails at blowing bubbles. She T poses her way to the water, shivering, figures out how to load the water gun (doesn't fire it) finds some shit on the ground and calls it a day. She wasn't there for even half an hour. It's like somebody promised her (or her mother) cash if she went to the beach in her trademark bare midriff and let everything take care of itself.
Honesty, her bafflement at people's perception of her as a fetish grifter not to mention general ditziness seems sincere. I don't think it's impossible that she is not emotionally mature enough to recognise that people might be taking advantage of her sexually. I don't know if thats better or worse.
