DSP's Hair Mega-Hyper-Ultra Thread - Patchy goatee talk included

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He could just turn off facecam altogether and thereby eliminate a good 30-40% of detractor memes and gripes. No more patchy beard, no more receding hairline, no more T-posing, no more Y-posing, no more "oh, the camera was on, huh?" accidents, etc
 
millais said:
He could just turn off facecam altogether and thereby eliminate a good 30-40% of detractor memes and gripes. No more patchy beard, no more receding hairline, no more T-posing, no more Y-posing, no more "oh, the camera was on, huh?" accidents, etc
Click to expand...

Terrible idea short and long term for all parties concerned: Phil, his hanest fans, his detractors....The only person not affected would possibly be SuperBlindMan.

Wings recently did this as an experiment for a video and it was fucking terrible. He was playing Witcher 3. The whole production was just like some epic fantasy RPG had a really annoying inbred narrator. DSP trying this might be worse. The facecam at least adds some context to why there's an annoying, whiny voice narrating the game and thanking people for shekels.

YouTube

www.youtube.com www.youtube.com
 
the khat quaffer said:
Terrible idea short and long term for all parties concerned: Phil, his hanest fans, his detractors....The only person not affected would possibly be SuperBlindMan.

Wings recently did this as an experiment for a video and it was fucking terrible. He was playing Witcher 3. The whole production was just like some epic fantasy RPG had a really annoying inbred narrator. DSP trying this might be worse. The facecam at least adds some context to why there's an annoying, whiny voice narrating the game and thanking people for shekels.

YouTube

www.youtube.com www.youtube.com
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and besides, how could we see if phil is actually pushing the block button without a camera?

seriously though, phil doesn't have the voice or even slightest amount of charisma required to go camless at this point. over half of his "content/comedy" both intentionally and unintentionally comes from his stupid facial expressions and autistic rocking. especially given how often he's completely silent and gives no commentary, like this recent retrospective stream.
 
If he's not able to talk he has to use a webcam as compensation. Now we can see what hides behind the dead air, the real epicenter of entertainment, the embodiment of a real hard working muscled man who was used to be fat but has lost weight (unrelated):
Perfect motionless and very angry staring at the TV, as if the camera is stuck, for minutes.
 
I honestly find Phil's insistence he isn't losing his hair incredibly funny. The fact that its obvious at this point, and seems to be progressing quicker and quicker just makes his excuses funnier. Especially because he's clearly very self conscious about it.
 
Since he banned the android troll after dealing with him for over a year at least because he brought up the fact he wont smile with his teeth showing in any photo, we can add his rats nest nasty ass teeth to the list thing phil is massively sensitive and self concious about. I would say perhaps even more than his male pattern baldness.
 
Wew lads it's growing
IMG_20190609_004152.png
 
Over/under on how long before he shaves his head completely? 1 year?

Side bet on which excuse he rolls with:
- My wife Khet thought I would look totally badass if I was bald
- I just shaved it to be Goldberg for Halloween dood, but Khet totally likes it so I'll keep shaving it
- Trolls/stress made me bald dood
- Headphones made me bald dood
- Shampoo company was a detractor
- Behind-the-scenes cancer
- Seattle air
 
FalsePositive said:
Over/under on how long before he shaves his head completely? 1 year?

Side bet on which excuse he rolls with:
- My wife Khet thought I would look totally badass if I was bald
- I just shaved it to be Goldberg for Halloween dood, but Khet totally likes it so I'll keep shaving it
- Trolls/stress made me bald dood
- Headphones made me bald dood
- Shampoo company was a detractor
- Behind-the-scenes cancer
- Seattle air
Click to expand...
Never. 10,000-to-1. Having a full head of healthy, lustrous hair, or at least the illusion thereof, is a crucial pillar to Phil's ultimate ego shield, that of the Acme, the Pinnacle of machismo. In Phil's head he is absolutely the epitome of testosterone. His y-chromosome might as well have an exclamation point next to it, it's so strong. And dominant. And powerful. Phil is not just a man. He is a man's man, to such a degree that you could say he is one in every sense of the word.

:christine:
 
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