💬 Off-Topic Death Fat Death Pool - The Kentucky Fried Derby

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Death Fat Death Pool

  • Total voters
    341
Yeah, as morbid as it feels to speculate, I'm gonna have to say Chantal's probably the first casualty. The distribution of her fat in her belly, her labored breathing, her history of PE among other health issues. Also, just looking at her lately, I'm seriously shocked at how much she's gained just in the past few months. She's spilling out of clothes now. Maybe it was always there and I never noticed, but the cottage cheese rippled arms and gut really put into perspective how unhealthy she's become. Walking to the stove should not leave a person so breathless.

Her greatest delusion is thinking that one day, she'll be laughing in our faces and saying "I told you so." Sure, Jan. She's like an alcoholic living in an open bar now with Peetz. She's got a rolly chair in her kitchen, strategically positioned right next to the fridge. Access to her drug of choice doesn't even require standing now. You see this all the time on MSHPL. The moment they plop their ass in a chair and that complacency sets in, it's always the beginning of the end.

I never understood how people reach immobility in this state, but watching her and Amberlynn over the years, it's really obvious now. It starts with the conscious decision to "allow" themselves permission to take a break from any kind of exertion, and then THAT becomes their normal. The less they move (and without radical changes to diet), the more they gain and the harder it is to do simple things like shopping for groceries without the assistance of a Scooty-Puff.

These are the perils of choosing the path of least resistance. It's bleak shit, man. Fascinating, but bleak.
 
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I managed to snapshot the poll when we hit exactly 500 votes and I'm saving it here for posterity; Chinny is gonna fucking die.
 
Let me get this straight - AL is implying she is dyeen from a heavy period because she’s mad at beckys mom for all the attention she’s getting for really being in the process of dying?

my vote stays on chinny. Which autocorrected to chubby on my phone, lol.
 
I'm going to have to change my vote. What were the odds that ALR dies before the man who isn't even in the Deathfat section, Jack Scalfani? That boomer had how many strokes and a now non-functioning arm, and he might outlive this almost 30 year old due to fat and gyno related cancer....
 
I am happy to see that there wasn't a fast uptick of Amber votes after her cancer news. That's just cheating!
 
If the cancer has metastisized, she's on the way to the graveyard this year. If it hasn't, as long as she survives the full hysto they give her, she may not even need chemo and may actually outlive one of the older messes on the list. Cancer isn't an automatic death sentence, but in Amber's case, she's in such poor shape overall that the treatment may well kill her before the disease does.
 
LetThemEatCake said:
If the cancer has metastisized, she's on the way to the graveyard this year. If it hasn't, as long as she survives the full hysto they give her, she may not even need chemo and may actually outlive one of the older messes on the list. Cancer isn't an automatic death sentence, but in Amber's case, she's in such poor shape overall that the treatment may well kill her before the disease does.
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what were the odds that in a year’s span we’d see two of our fat girlcows get neutered, wow. I thought she was just fucking lying about her weight loss but maybe she’s wasting from cancer. Ambers definitely gonna fucking die but I’m going to stay strong for chinny. You can do it gorl, just choke on a grape or something - the clock is ticking.

OP updated. I will add Amber’s current weight tomorrow if I can find it.

edit: my comment upthread calling amber a fat liar and then the immediate next post four days later being “amber actually has cancer” is funny as fuck and I should be laughed at for what a cynical, mistaken asshole I am.
 
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@tiggles her last weigh-in a few videos back was 502 I believe. The weigh-in before that was 497 IIRC. She's been stabilized at around 500lbs for a while, it seems.

Also guys I know some health discussion is inevitable, but please try not to sperg too much and take over the thread with cancer talk. AL's diagnosis thread is still featured on the front pages as of this writing, and there is also a Health Speculation thread in her subforum.
 
I've been holding off of this morbid horse race, but when you see a horse being strapped with a rocket engine, you got to place a bet.
 
edit: my comment upthread calling amber a fat liar and then the immediate next post four days later being “amber actually has cancer” is funny as fuck and I should be laughed at for what a cynical, mistaken asshole I am.
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To be fair, Amber is both a) fat and b) a liar.
 
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