💼 Careercow "Daddy" Derek Savage - Creator of Cool Cat Saves the Kids

[DykesDykesChina]

Millions dead in China? Obviously that's the work of Bruce Lee's relative, Chin.

That lamp scene kinda confused me. I guess it was supposed to set up the contrast between the two characters: One gets angry easily, while the other is more chilled and laid back, but I'm sure there were better ways to do it. Maybe he's trying to be artsy and make the lamp symbolic for something, but eh.

It kills me how he seems to think the president goes to Walmart or something to shop for lamps to put in the White House.

 

[Rihanna Ikari]

Standing in front of a full-length mirror, Johnny was wearing only a red and black striped g-string as he admired his tan physique. He was practicing exotic dance steps, swaying his lower body with the ease of a pendulum. This man was completely uninhibited.

Johnny knew how to drive his body, pulsating his hips toward the mirror with moves that could bring the most reserved female to lusty titillation. He was good at what he did and made the money that proved his talent. Holding a cold beer in one hand, he gripped his cell phone with the other. “I’m well, but I need a favor and you were the first cat that came to mind. My car is in the shop and I need a ride to work.”

“A ride to work! What are you talking about? It’s about time to sell that car.”

“Hey, be easy. She just needs a little repair. That’s what I get for shining her up too pretty and riding her too hard.”

“It’s funny how you always compare everything in a sexual way.”

“What else would you expect from me,” Johnny shot back.

I can see why Midnight Stripper is Derek Savage's only erotic book. This is not sexy in the slightest.

 

[Aobozu]

The IHE vs Derek drama may be over, but personally I feel that this is only the beginning of a huge can of worms opened up about Derek Savage even beyond IHE or even Cool Cat. There's just so much to be found out and laughed at. He sure lives a funny life indeed.

Just...impersonating an American law firm acting on behalf of a Canadian company to threaten a British man? That shit's gold!

 

[fridgesrants]

Has anyone read the first chapters of Derek's "novels"?

http://www.dereksavage.com/firstchapters.htm

Spoiler

Inside the Oval Office, the President, Jeff Christensen, sat at his desk shuffling through a stack of papers. He had to plan his next move before another problem altered his strategy.

Jack Smitty didn’t seem too bothered as he relaxed in his firm leather chair reading a book. He knew Jeff was in an uptight mood, but this novel captured his attention leaving no room for any distraction.

While the President scrutinized a document, the lamp on his desk burned out, leaving him in darkness. But this pissed him off more so he slapped the lighting fixture to the floor, breaking it into several pieces. “Stinking lamp, I paid two hundred dollars for it and it didn’t last a week. The piece of crap!”

Smitty glanced from his book. “I told you that lamp was no good. I bought the same one last year and it broke on me within a month.”

Jeff’s eyes squinted as he barked, “Those sorry bastards charged me two hundred dollars. I want you to find out who makes these shitty lamps and have them shut down! Do you hear me?”

“Yeah, I’ll do what I can,” Smitty agreed just to calm him down. There was no need to argue about a cheap lamp.

The dialogue sounds nearly exactly like the lines from the "Cool Cat" movie and videos -- it's the same choppy, unnatural speach.
Also, I'm pretty sure the president doesn't shop for lamps to put in the White House himself.

Spoiler

The President’s door was opened slightly. An assistant poked his head in and knocked gently. “Mr. President, do you have a minute?”

Jeff looked from his papers. “What do you want?”

The assistant spoke dramatically, “Sir, you will not believe what happened. It’s something straight out of a science fiction movie!”

“Look, boy. I don’t have time for your games. What are you talking about?”

The assistant bowed his head. “Yes, sir. I am sorry.” He stated more calmly, “We have received disturbing reports from China. Millions of people have been burnt to death.”

“Oh, no,” Smitty uttered with concern.

Jeff responded much more aggressively, “When did this happen?”

“Approximately twenty minutes ago, sir,” the assistant answered quickly.

“You stay on top of this and find out how many were killed. Do you hear me?”

“Yes, sir. It’s as good as done. Thank you, sir.” The assistant scurried away.

Jeff slammed his fist on the desk. “What the hell’s next?”

Smitty’s apprehension was obvious. “This isn’t good, Jeff. Half of our army is located there.”

The first thing the president would have asked is: What exactly happened? How can millions just "burn to death"?
How can they have a complete death toll only 20 minutes after the event?
And why is half of the US Army stationed in China??

Spoiler

The President blew up at the comment.“Don’t you think I know that, you stupid ass fool!”Jeff Christensen jumped to his feet and screamed at Smitty, “This is it. This is fucking it! I want every one of those sorry rats that refuse my mark to be killed. And I want them killed right now!”

He quite succeeds at making Gloria Tesch look like Charlotte Brontë in comparison.

This makes me want to read his novels. They seem like they would Sonichu tier bad. Also it seems like he has no idea about international politics from that excerpt.

 

[Ho Mo for Women]

I'd love to see Daddy Derek collaborate with Gloria Tesch on a new Maradonia book. Maybe titled Cool Cat, Maya, and Joey vs. the Lying Punk Troll.

 

[Globe]

Maybe he's trying to be artsy and make the lamp symbolic for something, but eh.

Bravo, Savage.

 

[Cosmos]

The IHE vs Derek drama may be over, but personally I feel that this is only the beginning of a huge can of worms opened up about Derek Savage even beyond IHE or even Cool Cat. There's just so much to be found out and laughed at. He sure lives a funny life indeed.

Just...impersonating an American law firm acting on behalf of a Canadian company to threaten a British man? That shit's gold!

Oh, yeah, this definitely isn't over. The IHE drama is just what's brought Derek and Cool Cat to a wider audience; it's by no means the only thing that made Derek and Cool Cat interesting. Derek is just fascinating, and there are still so many questions about him that need answering. How long did he work as a male model? How does he know so many celebrities? He seems to live in a very nice house in Hollywood, how did he get the money to buy it? And why did he become so intent on making a franchise about a giant orange catman that loves children?

Plus, Derek will probably flip out and cause more drama in the near future. He didn't learn anything from this, it's just that YouTube took IHE's side over his.

 

[DykesDykesChina]

Something tells me Derek once did porn. It's a gut feeling, I don't have any solid evidence, but this dude comes across like someone who once was a porn actor. That would also explain how he knew that policeman actor.

IMO he should have stuck with porn. Authoring, whether for kids or for adults, just isn't his cup of tea.

 

[Rin]

Something tells me Derek once did porn. It's a gut feeling, I don't have any solid evidence, but this dude comes across like someone who once was a porn actor. That would also explain how he knew that policeman actor.

IMO he should have stuck with porn. Authoring, whether for kids or for adults, just isn't his cup of tea.

Already confirmed if you count his Playgirl career. Even if you don't, he definitely has ties in the right industry for it.

 

[Hmmpf!]

I read "Lying, punk troll" on the tone of "Dirty, CRAPPED BRIEFS"

 

[Observatory]

If you compare his "then" to his "now"

I think I know why he is no longer in the industry. He has just aged and gained quite a few pounds.
He could've done quite a lot with his younger self, but right now, he might only really have writing and making furry movies.
The plus is, he has the passion for those things. We have seen what passion he has for Cool Cat and what shit he is willing to pull off, if people "bully" him over it.

My guess is really just that as his looks didn't fit the industry after a while, he went to other things that he had fun doing. He's just not good at them.

 

[Batman VS Tony Danza]

If he was in porn then I need to fucking hear him speak some shitty porn dialogue.

"Do you know what the best atlrunatul to vaginal sex is? Annual sex"

 

[Observatory]

I thought, why not check this claim? As expected, there is no "DOVE AWARD" featuring Cool Cat or Dereks name for anything.
But there is this instead.
This is the Dove Foundation and they merely rate if a movie is family friendly or not. It's not an award, but just a way for parents to see what movies are suitable for their children. And Cool Cat only seems to get a 3 out of 5 rating, on top of that.
Cool Cat wouldn't lie, Daddy Derek. You are not a good role model for your "son".

Changed font color - HSMOF.

 

[For The Internet]

Derek wrote something called 'The Devil President'.

It features a protagonist called Jonathon. He has a sensuous girlfriend called Lisa with whom he discusses his good fortune at work. Jonny has a best friend who has a four letter name that begins with M.


Derek confirmed for Tommy Wiseau Jr?

 

[nonnewtonian]

I thought, why not check this claim? As expected, there is no "DOVE AWARD" featuring Cool Cat or Dereks name for anything.
But there is this instead.
This is the Dove Foundation and they merely rate if a movie is family friendly or not. It's not an award, but just a way for parents to see what movies are suitable for their children. And Cool Cat only seems to get a 3 out of 5 rating, on top of that.
Cool Cat wouldn't lie, Daddy Derek. You are not a good role model for your "son".

I love how "painting graffiti on wall" counts as violent content.
For comparison, Kirk Cameron's Saving Christmas got a 5 out of 5 rating, and that movie has a creepy Santa staring at the camera like a serial killer while slowly cracking his knuckles, cave man Saint Nicholas beating the shit out of people to dubstep, and King Herod's army slaughtering babies.

 

[Bugaboo]

I love how "painting graffiti on wall" counts as violent content.
For comparison, Kirk Cameron's Saving Christmas got a 5 out of 5 rating, and that movie has a creepy Santa staring at the camera like a serial killer while slowly cracking his knuckles, cave man Saint Nicholas beating the shit out of people to dubstep, and King Herod's army slaughtering babies.

So is this like a bullshit not very trusted site or do they have user generated ratings made by idiots

 

[Ho Mo for Women]

Here's the Dove review for the movie. Note how even they picked up on Daddy Derek's implied cat-fucking.

 

[Jewelsmakerguy]

I love how "painting graffiti on wall" counts as violent content.
For comparison, Kirk Cameron's Saving Christmas got a 5 out of 5 rating, and that movie has a creepy Santa staring at the camera like a serial killer while slowly cracking his knuckles, cave man Saint Nicholas beating the shit out of people to dubstep, and King Herod's army slaughtering babies.

They do know that right? This has to be a joke.

If not, then they're really stupid people, and Derek should be ashamed for even trusting them to "rate" his movie.

 

[BlueChan]

Here's the Dove review for the movie. Note how even they picked up on Daddy Derek's implied cat-fucking.

This is a bit of a goldmine:

• Since when has "dag-nam-it" been a naughty word for children?
• "Other: Showing kindness to others; crossing street without looking." Even they thought that was questionable.
• Why is "smashing sand castle" counted as violence?

 

[A Ghost]

[QUOTE="BlueChan, post: 1118373, member: 2921"Why is "smashing sand castle" counted as violence?
[/QUOTE]
because violence against sand castles is too triggering for the little ones to see clearly plus violence against sand castle is a real issue that no one but derk savage has had the gusts to show on camera