🍽️ حلال Connor Bible - Everyone's Favorite Molly Ringwald loving, adoption hating, aspiring writer and bellybutton fucker

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Which Connor is the most amusing?

  • Semi-Motivated Connor, aka "I've written 200 words on my new story and took a walk with my grandma."

    Votes: 127 13.2%

  • Depressed Connor, or "Give me one reason why I shouldn't blow my brains out."

    Votes: 73 7.6%

  • Edgy Rebel Without a Cause Connor, or "Shut the fuck up you stupid motherfuckering faggots!"

    Votes: 529 55.0%

  • Smug Pseudo-Intellectual Connor or "I've read Bret Easton Ellis, you guys!"

    Votes: 232 24.1%
  • Total voters
    961
Okay Connor, let's be real for a second.

Why are you always so serious? One of the reasons I love the Farms is because people don't take things seriously, and a lot of them are funny.

Like, why don't you joke about anything ever? Why are you so unfunny?
 
balcolm said:
Okay Connor, let's be real for a second.

Why are you always so serious? One of the reasons I love the Farms is because people don't take things seriously, and a lot of them are funny.

Like, why don't you joke about anything ever? Why are you so unfunny?
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He's trying to sound all aloof and pretentious
I think
 
Nara said:
Then why don't you put more effort into it? If it's something you love, you should take pride in doing your best possible work.
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The only published professional writer I know of has described writing as like some kind of addiction. His main problem is that sometimes he spends too much time writing and not enough time working at his day job. And, while he does get pissy about bad reviews, he never lets fear of bad reviews stop him from writing. Unlike I certain C. Bible we know.

Connor Bible said:
What I don't like is the elitist, Social Darwinist mentality I've seen throughout the site.
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Connor, you have no problem with elitism in the abstract. You're only unhappy about elitism that frames you outside the putative elite.
 
You've gotten way too predictable @Connor. I knew exactly how this thread was going to progress just by the number of pages that were added today.
Have a nice existence since a life is just too hard for you.
(unwatches thread)
 
@Connor Bible , Oh. Oh dear. Look, we're just a forum of people who are actually happy with coexisting with one another, with the regular quarrel or disagreement. That is pretty much normal for forums that don't pat and powder each others bums.
I made a point a few (actually a lot of pages ago, lord you spam responses) about how this thread lays dormant other than a scattering here or there of posts when you aren't actively coming to us. Do you enjoy us seeing you tantrum like a child? Like a toddler stamping their feet are we your parental figures that have to see your annoyance at a slight problem?
Connor, let me pour myself a drink, have a smoke and hopefully by the time i've done that you'll be gone again. Best of luck with your endeavors.
 
lolwut said:
You think you could drag this out a big longer, Conner? At this rate the this iteration of the Conner Cycle will be over before most Amerikiwis get home from work and we haven't even heard from @BOLDYSPICY! yet.
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I'm sorry, my loves, I was kind of. . .hospitalized the last several days. Nothing physical, as I have KIDNEYS OF STEEL, but my brain decided to short-circuit. I blame Connor & that goddamn train thread. Anyways, it seems I've some reading to catch up on.

EDIT: Belated, but moving out of my parents' house was the best thing I ever did for myself. Sometimes it was hard, sometimes you had to tighten your belt & lurk around grocery store dumpsters, but it was a fantastic experience nonetheless. Now, having to move back in, that's what did my poor brain me in the first time.
 
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TrippinKahlua said:
Just go to your local Sports Authority with$50 and say to the man "I am here to purchase a kettle bell."

I promise you will not only see quick results, but you will also have a lot of fun doing it, and actually will have that "self-fulfillment" you just spoke about.
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Similarly, jog while listening to that Molly Ringwald album. Obsession fodder and getting fit! Win-win.
 
@Connor Bible what was your process in writing this review? When you sat down to work on it, how did you approach it? How much did you write per day? Were there any outlines or did you just begin winging it?
 
Man, I had a really good day today, I've recently had something that could get me out of the rut I've been in for far too long happen, and I could come in here to rub it in Connor's face, but even if he was still here... man, what would even be the point?

This time next year so much of our lives could change and Connor will still be the same, just a self-aggrandizing, useless lump who can't seem to put two-and-two together enough that writing is just not for him. He won't be able to say nobody tried to help him out, because we all have. He's gotten a ton of good advice, and he's never taken any of it, because he doesn't want it. He just wants to be handed the fame and fortune he feels he so rightly deserves. I think he ducked out early before the chimp-out just so he can pretend he's avoiding the inevitable Connor cycle. But I'm sure he's chimping out on the inside.

Oh, Connor. If you only had some sliver of self-awareness, you wouldn't be in this mess.
 
sikotik said:
You've gotten way too predictable @Connor. I knew exactly how this thread was going to progress just by the number of pages that were added today.
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>implying that Connor was ever not predictable

To be honest? I've practically been here enough to weasel my way into becoming a gym leader or something (to use the dead as fuck Pokémon metaphor), and even I've gotten a little bored with Connor although I wish for the best for him. The one thing I would like to tell the other posters is stop posting purely to try to change him or taking him seriously. It just fills the thread with hot air, is not funny, and only leads to frustration when you say the same shit over and over and over again that falls on dead ears and, at this point, it honestly says more about you than him.

I'll still be here once in a while, just not as often as I used to.

And of course he'll always occupy a spot in my cold, black heart. :heart-full:
 
Golly said:
Similarly, jog while listening to that Molly Ringwald album. Obsession fodder and getting fit! Win-win.
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My dearest Golly, I think you give Mr. Bible far too much credit by assuming he has the capacity to jog. "Fatty Ding Dongs" and all that.

He probably burns more calories by jerking it than he would by jogging.
 
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