🍽️ حلال Connor Bible - Everyone's Favorite Molly Ringwald loving, adoption hating, aspiring writer and bellybutton fucker

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Which Connor is the most amusing?

  • Semi-Motivated Connor, aka "I've written 200 words on my new story and took a walk with my grandma."

    Votes: 127 13.2%
  • Depressed Connor, or "Give me one reason why I shouldn't blow my brains out."

    Votes: 73 7.6%
  • Edgy Rebel Without a Cause Connor, or "Shut the fuck up you stupid motherfuckering faggots!"

    Votes: 529 55.0%
  • Smug Pseudo-Intellectual Connor or "I've read Bret Easton Ellis, you guys!"

    Votes: 232 24.1%

  • Total voters
    961
Why the pedo glasses? Do autists by them in bulk or something?

Yes.

glasses.png
 
So, Connor, you can respond to this one of two ways: you can crumple into another heap of "woe is me!" and "I'm being cyberbullied!" or you can nut up and prove everything I said wrong. I would love you to prove me wrong. I'd be fucking delighted. Even if it were done only out of spite to me, shit, at least you would be making something. At least you'd have some motivation.

You forgot option three: ignore it completely and never acknowledge it.

This never fails. You can put all of them in a room together and I wouldn't be able to tell them apart at first glance.

Wait. If we're unable to recognize faces in a sea of so much autism, doesn't that mean... we're catching it too?
 
Why the pedo glasses? Do autists by them in bulk or something?
Simple. They're really, really cheap frames. The actually stylish frames that genuinely look good are in higher demand and therefore cost more. Most people don't mind paying extra for frames that will actually look good on them. They also tend to be more durable as well due to higher quality material used. I'm not talking about the super trendy (super expensive) frames either. Just standard frames that look good.

The pedo frames, however, are in low demand. To give that option for people who can't, or don't want to, pay more money for something that looks good. Specifically for guys who can't or refuse to pay more money for something that looks good, I remember the saleslady telling me that style was only for boys and men while buying glasses for the first time. Not only are they cheaper because most people don't want them but also because they use cheaper materials to make them.

So autistic boys/men aren't going to see how that style of frames look bad and won't see any reason why they ought to pay more money for other frames (which frees up money for junk). And either their caretakers/parents don't give a shit or maybe something more expensive would be a genuine stretch on the budget (plausible, but less likely).

Source: I've been wearing glasses since 2nd grade.
 
All joking aside, it would be nice to have links to all the line-by-line analysis of the only ever first draft of Redesigning Eva in one place. And since I've been meaning to go through and reread them all, I decided to do just that. Thanks to @The Knife for doing this in the first place - it makes for a great read (and a much better one than the story itself).

Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapters 7 and 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12

I can't find a chapter six for some reason - possibly the numbering got off? Or maybe I'm just stupid.
 
All joking aside, it would be nice to have links to all the line-by-line analysis of the only ever first draft of Redesigning Eva in one place. And since I've been meaning to go through and reread them all, I decided to do just that. Thanks to @The Knife for doing this in the first place - it makes for a great read (and a much better one than the story itself).

Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapters 7 and 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12

I can't find a chapter six for some reason - possibly the numbering got off? Or maybe I'm just stupid.

I remember titling one section "Chapter I don't even know anymore." That was probably where the numbering got screwy because I literally got too frustrated to bother counting. Thanks for doing this!
 
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