🍽️ حلال Connor Bible - Everyone's Favorite Molly Ringwald loving, adoption hating, aspiring writer and bellybutton fucker

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Which Connor is the most amusing?

  • Semi-Motivated Connor, aka "I've written 200 words on my new story and took a walk with my grandma."

    Votes: 127 13.2%

  • Depressed Connor, or "Give me one reason why I shouldn't blow my brains out."

    Votes: 73 7.6%

  • Edgy Rebel Without a Cause Connor, or "Shut the fuck up you stupid motherfuckering faggots!"

    Votes: 529 55.0%

  • Smug Pseudo-Intellectual Connor or "I've read Bret Easton Ellis, you guys!"

    Votes: 232 24.1%
  • Total voters
    961
Soooo @Connor is sperging again

Shit never changes.

Hey, hows your current project going? (seriously)
 
Connor said:
I want to scare people. I want to make them laugh and cry. I want to keep them on the edges of their seats. Above all, I want to tell good, entertaining stories.
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the most important step in this is actually writing something good and entertaining

but you seem to want to skip that one

why?
 
Has angry edgy Connor made his inevitable appearance yet?
 
Connor said:
2) I can keep writing, regardless of what haters think.
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Ding ding ding ding ding! You picked the correct answer! No one in this thread, up to and including now, has ever even hinted slightly that writing would be easy. You don't, yet, want to know how many rounds of corrections and editing happen before a piece of writing sees print (and by that I include the web, because there are loads of great webzines or print magazines with abbreviated web versions). You will have to do things like cut scenes that you love, indeed kill off characters that you love. Tolkien did that -- Théoden, King of the Eorlingas (of Rohan), for example, and it was even kind of a stupid death because his spooked horse fell on him. But it, and the false belief that Éowyn, too, was dead (she was merely unconscious from killing the Nazgûl), caused Éomer to charge the enemy and kill the fuck out of a great many of them in that battle. Now, suppose Théoden King doesn't die? He survives that battle and the last big one of the series; rides back to Edoras in triumph; and gets old and senile all over again, the all-natural way? That's kind of a lame ending to his story and those of others. His nephew Éomer would still become king eventually, just probably past his prime and not much of the kind of warrior-king his people prefer. Éowyn still gets stuck in the Houses of Healing at Minas Tirith, but she's not as depressed, perhaps causing Faramir to ignore her instead of falling in love with her. It's the ripple effect. And so for your story to work, your favorite characters may have to die.

I cannot recommend strongly enough that some of your college courses should start to be about writing. The most important two things to do? Read (I don't include watching movies; it's a different part of the brain) and write. Even shit that you scribble in a cheap notebook that you never show us or anyone. Especially that shit. Rough drafts and scribbles expose hidden good ideas that may not have been in your outline originally, but are actually pretty great.
 
Dudeofteenage said:
Honestly though Connor, it's not about originality. We're not saying "action novels" can't work because they're unoriginal. We're saying they can't work because they can't work.
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So, it's wrong to fuck with primal forces of the writing universe by doing something out of the ordinary? Isn't that what writers are encouraged to do?
 
Connor said:
So, it's wrong to fuck with primal forces of the writing universe by doing something out of the ordinary? Isn't that what writers are encouraged to do?
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To do that requires a writer with a lot more talent than you seem to have.
 
Connor said:
So, it's wrong to fuck with primal forces of the writing universe by doing something out of the ordinary? Isn't that what writers are encouraged to do?
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I think it would be better to say it takes a very talented writer with a lot of skill to pull off a good action novel. You are neither talented nor skilled, and you lack both the self-awareness and the drive to become either of these things.

edit: sort of ninja'd by @sugoi-chan
 
Connor said:
So, it's wrong to fuck with primal forces of the writing universe by doing something out of the ordinary? Isn't that what writers are encouraged to do?
Click to expand...

There's a difference between "out of the ordinary" and "doomed to fail".

And at the risk of repeating myself, it really feels like your "action novel" idea just comes from your lack of interest in novels and overriding interest in action movies.

I like spinach dip, but I wouldn't try to write a novel that was all about some guy making spinach dip, and I certainly wouldn't try to paint myself as some flaming hot literary iconoclast for believing it was possible to write a good novel about some guy making spinach dip (or try to claim that, I dunno, Crime and Punishment was actually all about making spinach dip, without having read it).
 
Hi @Connor! Help settle something that Chat was talking about.

Who do you think is the more attractive lolcow:

EmiryBikini6.jpg
or
50c794fcbdee0_m.jpg
You can play too, other Kiwis! Like for Emiry, Agree for Gloria!
 
Connor said:
So, it's wrong to fuck with primal forces of the writing universe by doing something out of the ordinary? Isn't that what writers are encouraged to do?
Click to expand...

@Connor, chill out. It's helpful advice.

You cant use a filmic texture like 'action' to inform a book. It doesn't translate to that medium well.
 
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