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- Feb 3, 2013
To put it in terms Connor can understand:
One of these two gents is a published author. Care to guess which one?
🍽️ حلال Connor Bible - Everyone's Favorite Molly Ringwald loving, adoption hating, aspiring writer and bellybutton fucker
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One of these two gents is a published author. Care to guess which one?
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- Sep 24, 2015
"Dear Molly, I wrote you but you still ain't callin'"
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- Feb 4, 2013
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- Oct 1, 2014
Jesus Christ, he's such a thirsty little twerp.
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- Apr 11, 2014
Lefty doesn't have a belly button.
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- Jul 30, 2013
It's a good thing Connor doesn't have a girlfriend and can't drive and is mortally terrified of alcohol or he might kidnap her, get drunk and drive off a bridge.
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- Dec 28, 2014
His last name is Bible, not Kennedy.
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- Mar 29, 2014
But that can happen to children who aren't adopted too.
I think I know why Connor may struggle with even one class per semester.
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- Feb 3, 2013
Yeah, I really have no idea why he even gives it half a thought.
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- Mar 29, 2014
What really triggered Connor's hatred of adoption in the first place?
The movie Juno, IIRC.
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- Mar 29, 2014
Just like a movie sparked Connor's obsession with Molly Ringwald. I'm beginning to get the idea that all of Connor's obsessions began with movies, which undoubtedly reinforces why the Bibles regulate what Connor watches.
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- Apr 18, 2013
I think it's because he legitimately can't comprehend someone actually loving something they aren't sexually attracted to or related to, so he thinks that anyone who adopts a kid must have ulterior motives for doing so and probably abuse the shit out of the kid because they don't care.
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- Jun 15, 2014
Worth pointing out that taking one class a semester is such a bare-minimum level of effort that it doesn't really qualify as human interaction. That's basically putting on a mask and dancing through a room for a few minutes, it doesn't challenge or change you in any way, and it doesn't satisfy the human instinctual need to be accepted by a group. So Connor is still stuck in the same mindset of a lonely horny angsty teenager. No one likes him or gives him any affection except for his family, and it's pretty clear they only 'tolerate' him, because frankly at this point they must be sick of his constant whining and total ineptitude and zero level of contribution to their family unit.
So I think you're spot on here. Everything Connor perceives is run through a "Virgin with Rage" filter, hence why he waffles back and forth between being a massive coward and an edgy punk. Thinking about adoption probably first triggers some deep seated jealousy that people are actually out there getting laid when he knows he never, ever will. Then there's this huge lack of understanding of the concept of familial love in the first place, since he obviously sees his parents as nothing but a button he presses to get his chicken tendies, and they have to have some kind of resentment at the walking failure they wound up anchored with. The idea of loving functional people trying their best to help someone who couldn't help themselves, that's an alien concept to someone as selfish as Connor. Sprinkle in a little dose of try-hard asshole, shake it all up, and you end up with a fat lonely weirdo frothing with rage that people he doesn't know and will never meet aren't out there getting abortions.
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- Jul 22, 2013
Connor Bible was last seen:
6d 5h ago
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- Mar 29, 2014
Maybe he jerry rigged that computer again.
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- May 27, 2013
I am just never going to stop hating. Connor Bible is not funny.
Hating the fact that this completely unfunny sperg continues to be discussed day after day. I place all the blame here.
@Connor Bible
Why? All along its your fault because it was a time when you needed to chose who to "Halal" (a made-up word, by the way) a weird as fuck member your choices were TrippinKahlua, and Connor. You ended up picking someone who was NOT FUCKING FUNNY!
Even back then I was trying and trying to tell you.
CONNOR BIBLE IS NOT FUCKING FUNNY
You STILL don't even realize it do you! Its all your fault for glorifying him! And for not encouraging him to get a Kettlebell so his head could actually be screwed on right for once!
Hating the fact that this completely unfunny sperg continues to be discussed day after day. I place all the blame here.
@Connor Bible
Why? All along its your fault because it was a time when you needed to chose who to "Halal" (a made-up word, by the way) a weird as fuck member your choices were TrippinKahlua, and Connor. You ended up picking someone who was NOT FUCKING FUNNY!
Even back then I was trying and trying to tell you.
CONNOR BIBLE IS NOT FUCKING FUNNY
You STILL don't even realize it do you! Its all your fault for glorifying him! And for not encouraging him to get a Kettlebell so his head could actually be screwed on right for once!
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- Oct 1, 2014
Dude, chill.
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- Feb 3, 2013