🍽️ حلال Connor Bible - Everyone's Favorite Molly Ringwald loving, adoption hating, aspiring writer and bellybutton fucker

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Which Connor is the most amusing?

  • Semi-Motivated Connor, aka "I've written 200 words on my new story and took a walk with my grandma."

    Votes: 127 13.2%
  • Depressed Connor, or "Give me one reason why I shouldn't blow my brains out."

    Votes: 73 7.6%
  • Edgy Rebel Without a Cause Connor, or "Shut the fuck up you stupid motherfuckering faggots!"

    Votes: 529 55.0%
  • Smug Pseudo-Intellectual Connor or "I've read Bret Easton Ellis, you guys!"

    Votes: 232 24.1%

  • Total voters
    961
At first I was going to say that @Smutley was maybe confusing this girl with the last girl he talked about on WrongPlanet, who just happened to be 'going on a holiday,' when Connor wanted to connect with her, but then I went and looked up Destinee. She's either a fake, or Connor has been extremely over exaggerating how close they are in his head, probably based off no more than a few Facebook conversations.

I know this is harsh but if real, the girl is beautiful, a law student and she travels all around Europe meeting new people. Connor on the other hand is a shut in who lives under his parents thumb, who's mocked online and who is too lazy to even do one class in community college.

I really hope that this girl is a fake because it's beyond disrespectful of Connor to come into this thread bragging about how she's his girlfriend and practically doxing her himself. I think if someone did that to most of us we'd all block them and never speak to them again.

I'm kind of glad Connor's back though all the same. I won't be giving him any positive advice but I think if he wants to let us hear about how he's been progressing then we should humour him. Even if it's just to laugh at him when he makes no progress at all
 
He's an unemployed community college dropout who's legally forbidden from managing his own money and can't drive. Where would he even meet a globetrotting supermodel law student?
 
I love how he's so eager to brag that a girl he used to know nicely messaged him back on Facebook that he blatantly identified her on this website, I mean what could go wrong. So Chris-esque.
 
I know this is harsh

There's no harshness in saying that the ocean is wet. It's not harsh at all to say that the Sahara desert is full of sand. No honest person can claim that you're being harsh if you say that it's colder in winter.

Similarily, saying that there's no reason an attractive worldly law student would have any interest in dating a lazy, dim-witted, lazy, fat, ugly, lazy, unemployed , creepy, lazy, excuse-making, friendless, unhygienic, lazy, self-absorbed, lazy asshole like Connor Bible... that's not harsh. That's just reality. If this girl ends up marrying the blubbery anchor that's currently stalking her, I'll be the first to eat my words. But until then I'm going to continue to operate under the assumption that this girl is 'taking applications' for a handsome intelligent ambitious guy who showers regularly and is good in bed, and consequently assume that Connor is lying about his 'progress'

Fair enough. Still, eight pages is a short chapter by novel guidelines. Writing that many words if you're trying to be a novelist shouldn't take you longer than an hour or two.

I think you pretty much hit on why Connor is so infuriating. And why people are so insistent on helping him.

How much Connor writes doesn't matter. Connor could go the rest of his life without writing down a single word, and it literally wouldn't matter to the world in any capacity. He could have a part time job, or be a CEO, or continue being a lazy unemployed leech sucking money out of his parents retirement. He could have no friends, or a thousand loyal fans, or one weird asshole he likes playing video games with. He could get his doctorate, go to school once a semester, or have dropped out of high school and never tried again.
Connor sucks because nothing he does actually matters, but he keeps billing himself as an 'aspiring novelist' and playing up his tortured artist bullshit. He's probably the least tortured artist in the history of makin' stuff, but he has to talk nonstop about his craft and how much of a struggle it is. He could write ten words a day, by hand, and still leave behind a full length book after he dies. Instead he writes 500 words about how hard writing is, despite having nothing else to do with his time. In fact, having a part time job would probably make him a better writer, because he'd least have some passion about what he spent his free time doing.

Connor Bible drives people crazy because it's exactly like seeing a beached whale. You know it could swim if it got in the water, you're just not sure why this fat monstrosity decided to bank itself and wait to die, or why it smells so god damn bad.
 
Anyone link her to the thread yet? Fine, I'll do it.
 
Here's a more effective jerry rigging for your computer to keep you off the farms @Connor Bible
smash-computer.jpg
 
Connor you ain't got no girlfriend, you got a girl you is just humoring you by responding to you to be nice.
I think the fact that you're calling her your girlfriend without her permission is disgusting and disrespectful. Just because a woman talks to you doesn't mean she's your girlfriend
 
@Connor Bible I'd most like to see how alphaboy and RE are coming along. Is there anywhere I could go to read the treatment? You seem a lot more chilled out and reasonable. Much less spergy. I have high hopes for the new version.

Also, what parts did you change and why?
Was there anything in particular that inspired you to have another crack at it?
As an aspiring writer myself, I understand that writing is a never ending, ongoing process and it would be interesting to see how you've grown as an artist over the last few months.
 
I've only ever seen it spelled "jury." The Wikipedia article does mention the term "jerry built" though.

I saw so many people quoting "jerry rigged" in quotes.

The origin of "jury-rigged" is probably the nautical phrase "jury-mast" for a temporary mast used to replace a broken mainmast. "Jerry-rigged" might have come out of a combination of the different phrase "jerry-built" for something sloppily or quickly built. This probably didn't come from the word "Jerry" for Germans, but that might have kept the phrase alive during WW I when the Germans were running out of resources and had to make do with improvised repairs. The "jury" form is probably the original.
 
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