🍽️ حلال Connor Bible - Everyone's Favorite Molly Ringwald loving, adoption hating, aspiring writer and bellybutton fucker

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Which Connor is the most amusing?

  • Semi-Motivated Connor, aka "I've written 200 words on my new story and took a walk with my grandma."

    Votes: 127 13.2%
  • Depressed Connor, or "Give me one reason why I shouldn't blow my brains out."

    Votes: 73 7.6%
  • Edgy Rebel Without a Cause Connor, or "Shut the fuck up you stupid motherfuckering faggots!"

    Votes: 529 55.0%
  • Smug Pseudo-Intellectual Connor or "I've read Bret Easton Ellis, you guys!"

    Votes: 232 24.1%

  • Total voters
    961
Connor, didn't you finally admit you were going to start using kettlebells? You finally lied to me?

Now I am mad at you.

Instead of getting a kettlebell, my new suggestion is to get liposuction. It pretty much is the lazy way to lose weight, and you will never lose it naturally.

I mean. Just one class of fifth grade math is enough to stress you.
 
Helping his grandma with shopping and chores. How dare she be old and unable to do things anymore!
Well, to be fair, even OPL had to weed the garden, help his father in the garage and mow the lawn under the hot hot sun. I figure Connor has to do all those things as well, plus cook and clean for his Grandmother. After all she's letting him stay there rent free and he needs to pitch in somehow right?

Hey Connor? What kind of chores do you do around the house to help your poor grandmother?
 
3x + 1 = 10

WHAT DO I DO 3 + 1 DEFINITELY DOESN'T = 10!
I just picture Connor looking at the math homework and asking it in a fed up tone "you want me to kill myself, don't you?"
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Why are all your draws such win? I especially like the way his Klausplay (rimshot.wav) slips a bit more in every frame.
 
I'm sitting here reading the board, having a triple vodka n' coke. Why? Because I'm sore almost everywhere. Why?

Because today at work I cut, in no particular order: Two 30 Lb. boxes of pork neckbones, four 75 lb. boxes of bone-in pork loin, three sixty pound boxes of chuck rolls into roasts & steaks, two shoulder clods, two sixty pound cases of bottom round flats, twenty pounds of sirloin knuckles, two 40 lb. cases of boneless pork loin, two twenty-five pound cases of boneless pork sirloin, a 95 lb. case of short loin, a 100 lb. case of NY strip primals into steaks, twelve aprox. 60 lb. cases of Boston butt, cut up three shank hams into hocks, a thirty pound box of salted fatback, and ground about 600 Lbs. of meat trim into hamburger meat & sausage.

And I'm home before 3:30 P.M. CST.

Connor- talk to me about tired, motherfucker.
I'm hungry.
 
I'm sitting here reading the board, having a triple vodka n' coke. Why? Because I'm sore almost everywhere. Why?

Because today at work I cut, in no particular order: Two 30 Lb. boxes of pork neckbones, four 75 lb. boxes of bone-in pork loin, three sixty pound boxes of chuck rolls into roasts & steaks, two shoulder clods, two sixty pound cases of bottom round flats, twenty pounds of sirloin knuckles, two 40 lb. cases of boneless pork loin, two twenty-five pound cases of boneless pork sirloin, a 95 lb. case of short loin, a 100 lb. case of NY strip primals into steaks, twelve aprox. 60 lb. cases of Boston butt, cut up three shank hams into hocks, a thirty pound box of salted fatback, and ground about 600 Lbs. of meat trim into hamburger meat & sausage.

And I'm home before 3:30 P.M. CST.

Connor- talk to me about tired, motherfucker.
But can you solve algebra problems????
 
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