🍽️ حلال Connor Bible - Everyone's Favorite Molly Ringwald loving, adoption hating, aspiring writer and bellybutton fucker

[caffeinated_wench]

I'm really not sure what "Goo Girls learn slate" is and I'm almost afraid to google the term.

"Google Translate" is what it's trying to translate it to.

 

[Phil Ken Sebben]

"Google Translate" is what it's trying to translate it to.

....well now I just feel stupid.

Although in my defense, I would never have considered translate to be written in katakana although in keeping with the theme I guess it works.

Fuck it. It's late and I'm going to sleep.

 

[*Asterisk*]

....well now I just feel stupid.

Although in my defense, I would never have considered translate to be written in katakana although in keeping with the theme I guess it works.

Fuck it. It's late and I'm going to sleep.

I'm still at the N4 level. For all I know, they use completely different words to describe Google Translate in 日本語。But given the Japanese's love of unnecessary 言葉の西、another phrase that for all I know is made up, I thought it was a decent enough guess.

 

[The Knife]

This thread began on 15 January 2015 and now has 501 pages. That's like 4 1/2 Redesigning Evas in less than 1/6th of the time. (Granted, the average word count for a page of this thread probably isn't anywhere equal to an average manuscript page, but some people have written substantial posts. Phil Ken Sebben's writing post on the last page was itself about 1000 words long.)

In the time this thread has existed, Mauv has written parodies of RE and Alphaboy equal to or exceeding the word-counts of the original drafts. He's also written at least two short stories based on concepts that Connor talked about but never got around to.

Over in the Alphaboy thread, several people have written critiques that are longer than the works they were critiquing. I'm a bit sleepy and having trouble hunting down the actual thread, but I wanna say that at least two, maybe three people did this, and that one person's analysis was extremely detailed and as long if not longer than the fragment Connor posted.

My file for my analysis of Redesigning Eva is just over twice the size of the file that only contains the draft itself, which makes sense since most of the time I was writing about two sentences' worth of analysis for every sentence of content.

None of this is even counting anyone else's non-written creative input, such as BoldySpicy's art or MasterDisaster's interviews.

None of this is even counting the fact that most of us have lives, jobs, and schooling that take up the majority of our time away from the Farms.

So yes, this is another "we're all more successful at writing than Connor" post. But it's also a small indication of the sheer volume of writing you can accomplish if you peck at it just a little every day. I won't say anything for the quality of our writing, but hey, it exists! And I think most of you guys have accomplished some pretty funny, often hilarious, frequently insightful, sometimes painfully close-to-the-bone writing on this thread. Go you.

 

[Phil Ken Sebben]

I'm still at the N4 level. For all I know, they use completely different words to describe Google Translate in 日本語。But given the Japanese's love of unnecessary 言葉の西、another phrase that for all I know is made up, I thought it was a decent enough guess.

I've always said that translation, especially between Asian and Western languages, is less a science and more an art. It's not just how the words are arranged in the sentence but what the feeling or the message actually is. Then you get those words that don't actually have a meaning on the other side of the fence and you have to dance around trying to find a concept that fits.

Spoiler: Japanese sperging

Take for example the word "yoroshiku" which is usually spoken when you formally meet somebody for the first time in "hajimemashite yoroshiku" or if you want to get really polite "yoroshiku onegai shimasu". It has no specific meaning in English but often times these phrases are translated out to "pleased to meet you" because they serve the same purpose. But when you get down to it it means something like, "I may or may not be a burden to you".

Then, because they like to condense words, you can get sentences in one word that now mean what the sentence did. Have you ever heard the term "kamonegi" meaning "a fortunate happenstance"? The word itself is a portmanteau of duck and leek. The longer saying is, "kamo ga negi o shotte kuru" meaning "a duck comes bearing a leek" or co-incidentally exactly what you needed for dinner tonight. Or the more popular "baka" meaning stupid which is the combination of the characters for "horse" and "deer". The source is unknown, possibly from a Chinese parable, but it means "somebody who is so stupid they can't tell the difference between a horse and a deer".[/QUOTE]

 

[Sanae Kochiya]

No joke, Connor, if I was you I would seriously write a story about a down-on-his-luck guy who desperately wanted to be an author but his work was constantly subjugated and criticized by a bunch of random people on the Internet, but with grit, hard work, determination, and his online waifu whose navel he is uncomfortably obsessed with, he eventually became a successful and celebrated author.

You don't even have to try thinking of the content.

 

[Accel_Rider]

There was a saying I saw on the internet, I don't know who said it, but here it is.
"Every first novel is the author either as Christ or as Faust"
Just write the most self-indulgent shit you can, Connor. Everyone who wrote a story probably have done it at some point. Use that as a practice or something

 

[The Knife]

There was a saying I saw on the internet, I don't know who said it, but here it is.
"Every first novel is the author either as Christ or as Faust"
Just write the most self-indulgent shit you can, Connor. Everyone who wrote a story probably have done it at some point. Use that as a practice or something

Adding to this, Shirley Jackson once said that the first novel is the novel you write to get back at your parents. Once you've gotten that out of the way, you can really start writing.

 

[Accel_Rider]

Adding to this, Shirley Jackson once said that the first novel is the novel you write to get back at your parents. Once you've gotten that out of the way, you can really start writing.

Considering the amount of things he said about his parents, Connor could probably write a trilogy of novels.

 

[caffeinated_wench]

So yes, this is another "we're all more successful at writing than Connor" post. But it's also a small indication of the sheer volume of writing you can accomplish if you peck at it just a little every day. I won't say anything for the quality of our writing, but hey, it exists! And I think most of you guys have accomplished some pretty funny, often hilarious, frequently insightful, sometimes painfully close-to-the-bone writing on this thread. Go you.

I don't know about the rest of you guys, but I needed to hear this today.

 

[Hi I Am From Page 6]

Over in the Alphaboy thread, several people have written critiques that are longer than the works they were critiquing.

That is possibly the most autistic thing I've seen this month.

 

[DH 384]

Over in the Alphaboy thread, several people have written critiques that are longer than the works they were critiquing. I'm a bit sleepy and having trouble hunting down the actual thread, but I wanna say that at least two, maybe three people did this, and that one person's analysis was extremely detailed and as long if not longer than the fragment Connor posted.

I'm the guy who ended up making the detailed analysis in the Alphaboy thread, and I'm just going to add on to this to add perspective to the whole thing. I'd normally agree and call it autistic as all hell as well since the story doesn't deserve that much attention as Hi I Am From Page 6 just said, except it only took me about a couple of hours to do. While I was also trying to get ready for work.

Connor's first chapter was roughly 1880 words when I posted it into Word and I presume that it was a weeks-long project that came about out of MasterDisaster's talks with him. Hell, he could have been working on it for longer. My analysis of that chapter (with the story excerpt quotes and the image of Shinji taken out) is about 1700 words, more or less, and it took me probably about an hour or a half-hour for every week that Connor worked on this.

The point is, if you stop thinking too hard and then go back in and edit later, you can get a lot done on a story. It doesn't have to be a masterpiece out of the gate, it just has to be interesting enough to keep people hooked. You should mostly worry about fundamental bad writing flaws that would be impossible to fix without reworking the story (and based off Alphaboy and Eva, you're a major fan of these bad writing conventions). For everything else, that's what editing's for. Just don't post your stuff before you edit if you want to be taken seriously...

Actually, scratch that. Post everything, this stuff his hilarious so far.

 

[Conrix]

I can kinda see why Connor wouldn't want to work full-time at some menial job - he probably sees it as a distraction from his writing or his one spoon for the day that could have been writing 100 words.

I mean I already have a massive Mario game project and it's a pain in the ass trying to work around everything that happens in my life.

 

[BOLDYSPICY!]

I can kinda see why Connor wouldn't want to work full-time at some menial job - he probably sees it as a distraction from his writing or his one spoon for the day that could have been writing 100 words.

I mean I already have a massive Mario game project and it's a pain in the ass trying to work around everything that happens in my life.

I. . .I can't tell if you're joking or not.

 

[Dr. Meme]

I mean I already have a massive Mario game project and it's a pain in the ass trying to work around everything that happens in my life.

I'm gonna need to see some proof

 

[JustSomeFella]

oh look he edited it out of his post

 

[Sanae Kochiya]

oh look he edited it out of his post

Quick, get the mods!

 

[EI 903]

oh look he edited it out of his post

Quick, get the mods!

Reverted.

 

[Dr. Meme]

Connor, its time you sat down and finally write a whole book from start to finish! its not that hard. Just yesterday I had to compile a 700 page mario x link yaoi rule 34 fan art book for yaoihavenreborn.com from start to finish, which took up most of my day (I had to skip school and pretend i was sick to finish it on schedual, fake vomit and all) and if i can do that, then you can too. just believe in yourself

 

[Ruin]

So how fat is Connor? From the pics he posted on Spergplanet he seems closer to Strikerwolf than to CWC.