KiwiChud
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Aug 3, 2024
OPEN BOOK TEST- What Superhero Has The WORST Fans? (Hint: It's SPIDER-MAN...By FAR)
Transcript:(0:01) Hi everyone, it's your boy Zach and I got a quick question. (0:06) How does ant killer affect birds? Because there's like, the lawn's been doing pretty good. (0:13) My philosophy changed.
Instead of planting a lot of seeds, I just cleared weeds, tilled soil, (0:21) and then I let the surrounding grass fill in the bald spots. But there's one where (0:26) like ants, this isn't just like an ant colony, it's like an ant camp Pendleton. Like, it's (0:32) a structure.
Underground, like the pit from G.I. Joe. So I put some ant killer, (0:40) where they, you know, it smells like food to them and they take it down into the (0:46) hive or whatever. But I see a bunch of birds eating it.
That can't be good. (0:51) Um, but anyway, so, um, great finale to, uh, Maul, uh, Shadow Lord Season 1. Excellent finale to, (1:01) uh, Daredevil Season 2 or 5 or 6, depending if you count Defenders. Um, and then, uh, uh, (1:13) but there's been a lot of talk about Spider-Man One More Day from 20 years ago.
Um, and, (1:21) uh, I'm, I'm kind of in a bad mood because I heard something and then I went to go confirm it. And, (1:2
okay, so Spider-Man One More Day happened 20 years ago and yeah, people never stopped (1:33) complaining about it, but it wasn't an active topic of conversation until recently. And yeah, (1:39) Joe Quesada, like he did like a blog and he showed some of the panels.
So they got riled up. But (1:45) again, that was a couple of months ago, but it keeps getting brought up and it gets brought up (1:51) in the guise of, well, the reason I'm not, um, reading Marvel comics is because of One More Day. (1:5
It's like, bro, no, that's the reason you're not, that's the reason you're giving now, (2:05) because during the SJW era, you were saying, I'm not reading because it's woke and they hired a (2:15) most part and are getting quite good and you need a new excuse.
So Spider-Man One More Day didn't (2:23) become more trenchant, you know, or it's just, it's really kind of revealed that the people (2:30) who were kind of hanging out during the, the, uh, culture war, they didn't want what they wanted. (2:39) They were pretending like, oh, let's get these wokies out of comics. But it's like, no, you (2:44) haven't read comics in 20 years, maybe 30.
Every time I see these guys bragging, like the goal (2:50) posts, it's like, I haven't watched a Star Wars movie in five years. I haven't watched the MCU in (2:55) 10 years. I haven't read a Marvel comic 20 years.
And then some guy throws down the trump card. (3:01) I can't read. It's like, they're, everyone's like jealous.
Like, oh, he got us. You will, (3:06) you won this round guy with Leonidas beard who complains about Disney princesses for a living. (3:14) Why do they all have these Leonidas beards to be the biggest pussies ever? I find it hilarious.
(3:19) Um, uh, but, um, anyway, so, so somebody comes to, I was like, you know, oh, you know, (3:27) one more day. And I was like, bro, you, you, if, if they wouldn't have broken up and broken up the (3:32) marriage, you would have some other excuse. Cause you guys always have another excuse (3:36) during the culture war.
It's the culture war. This is why I'm not reading culture war basically (3:40) ends. You're like, well, actually I'm not reading because of one more day.
It's like one more day (3:44) predated the culture war by like 10 years. Um, so this is what pissed me the off. So somebody in the (3:53) comments, they're like, yeah, they're always saying, you know, Peter Parker wouldn't have (3:57) made this decision, but it was actually Mary Jane.
And like, it was, I heard multiple sound (4:03) effects in my head at the same time. I heard the record scratch sound effect. I heard the (4:0
slamming breaks sound effect.
I was like, wait, hold up now. And it's always been like the same (4:15) guys. It's always these like in their fifties, dead Flanders.
I'm a nice guy guys. It's always (4:21) the guys who tell you what religion they are, but they don't show you. And I've just got to say (4:26) the worst, what character has the worst fans? It's not a contest.
It's spider by far by far. (4:37) So I went to, and it wasn't a fun experience. You know, when you wake up, your eyes aren't quite (4:42) clear.
I was like rage reading spider-man comics from 20 years ago and, and just like squinting (4:51) and like trying to read. Cause they're doing like a different font from Mephisto. And, um, (4:57) so first, so what I always hear, it's like, you know, Peter Parker's a hero.
He wouldn't have (5:01) his marriage. He didn't. It was Mary Jane.
It was Mary Jane. Now it was a lot more nuanced nuance (5:0
than that. Uh, the, uh, deal was presented to Peter Parker.
It was discussed between him and (5:15) Mary Jane. And then basically at the last moment, she just kind of leaned in and like whispered (5:19) some stuff to him and agreed to it under different conditions. Like, you know, uh, his identity, (5:25) which had been revealed has to be secret again.
You know, Aunt May just can't get killed like a (5:32) different way. A day later, uh, Peter is still Peter. He's still a good guy.
And it's like, (5:39) so you guys have been complaining for 20 years about a storyline that either you didn't read (5:46) or you don't remember accurately. Yeah. It's infuriating.
Um, but yeah, so I am freaking, (5:55) ah, this sucks. The bugs, we had a good few months, you know, so you could like work in the yard (6:00) without the bugs, but now they're just instantly upon you. Kind of reminds me of middle-aged (6:05) Spider-Man fans.
So when I say Spider-Man has the worst fans, I'm not talking about all his fans. (6:10) I'm talking about the people who being a Spider-Man fan is part of their personality or their (6:16) personality. Like I said, they're always the same.
They're always like these Ned Flanders. I'm a nice (6:20) guy guys. And it's like, I have every single issue in Mylar, but I've hated it for 20 years.
(6:26) Hey, perch, tell me, uh, I should keep collecting it. He's just like, I don't give a fuck, (6:31) collect it or don't collect it. Um, but one of the things I think, uh, I hate them for many reasons.
(6:3
Um, first of all, they're all fucking the same. Like they're all the same. Um, uh, they're always (6:44) like, oh, that Marvel.
I hate them, but I've been buying all their books for 20 years. It's like, (6:49) that's why you fuck. They have a guaranteed income source.
They're like, okay, no matter what (6:56) happens, what goes up, what goes down, what's popular, these fucking Ned Flanders dorks by (7:02) Spider-Man. That's why Dan Slott was on for 10 fucking years while he was telling you guys to (7:07) fuck off. Cause you still bought his books.
Um, but, um, yeah, so, uh, they're always, (7:15) they always say like, I've got every single issue. It's like, and then they go, but I haven't read (7:19) it in 50 years. Then why are you, why are you collecting it? And also, you know, uh, they've (7:2
got the, I'm a nice guy thing.
I'm a nice guy, but they're always like the most bitter, petty, (7:34) hold onto grudges forever guys. They're actually, they are like, and they always see themselves in (7:40) Peter Parker. Like I'm just like Peter Parker.
It's like, you know what you are, but you're that (7:44) Ditko Parker, that asshole Parker. Go read the original few years of Spider-Man. Peter Parker (7:51) is not a likable guy.
You know, who's actually likable? Flash Thompson. Yeah. Flash Thompson's (7:57) a blowhard, but he's constantly, he's not just inviting Peter to hang out.
He's inviting Peter (8:05) to hang out with the cool crowd. And it's not like a Carrie thing where he's, you know, he's (8:0
like making the prom king and then make fun of him. And he's, he's trying to get Peter dates.
(8:16) It's like, whatever Flash, you don't have the IQ to share a jalopy with me. And, um, but yeah, (8:24) so, uh, they're always like, I'm a nice guy. Then they buy stuff they hate.
Then they complain (8:2
about the stuff they buy that they hate. I saw, I listened to one review of a recent Spider-Man (8:36) storyline. And you know what I always say from like all the lies that are told in the military (8:42) that I got good at reverse engineering the truth.
I reverse engineered this story is just fine from (8:49) their complaints. They're like, why did this character make this decision? And this character (8:53) made a different decision. They're two different characters.
Why did the supporting character make (8:5
a less honorable decision than the main character? Because he's, he's a hero and that person's a (9:03) character. Why is the villain able to handle the, um, uh, symbiote better than the hero? (9:09) Because the villain has had a symbiote for years and he's kind of more honest with himself about (9:14) his dark side. Um, the biggest like fake fan tourist thing, it's like, we just had a whole (9:20) storyline with a villain and we don't even know his identity.
That's bad writing. It's like, Oh, (9:26) you are a tourist. Spider-Man specifically as a franchise has a long history.
I'm talking about (9:35) back to the Ditko days where they will have a whole storyline with a masked villain and not say (9:42) who it is. And sometimes they don't even know that's how you end up with like Ned Leeds being (9:49) hobgoblin. Like they just start a story with a hobgoblin, cool design.
Let's run with it. Oh, (9:54) it's doing well. And then they're like, Ooh, who's, who's the hobgoblin? They're like, (9:5
fuck if I know.
They're like, uh, we don't have any copyrighted characters named fuck if I know, (10:04) let's just make it Ned Leeds. It's like, look at fucking Ned Leeds. Um, but yeah, (10:0
if you want to talk about like just the worst.
And again, I'm talking about the ones in their (10:12) fifties because Spider-Man is a character for young people. He's a character for all people. (10:1
Like, Oh, there's a Spider-Man movie.
I'll go see it. But to really, really, really, (10:21) when I first started collecting comments, I was really into Spider-Man and yeah, I did. Oh, (10:26) he's just like me a bit, but you know what then happened? Then I became like 20 years old and I (10:33) was like, no, yeah.
At the time Spider-Man was like, you know, in his mid twenties in the story, (10:39) uh, in the continuity. But, um, there's some characters that age well, I think it's, (10:47) and I, and I was had a little talk with myself. It's like, well, why do I say this about Spider-Man? (10:51) But I don't say it about Daredevil.
Cause sometimes in the storyline he's presented like (10:55) in his like mid late twenties. And I think it's because Daredevil was like always so serious, (11:01) even when he was a kid, he was a serious. But the other thing is that Bendis like 25 years ago (11:07) decided that Parker was not, you know, the personality he had been from like 1970 to the (11:12) year 2000, but he was basically a cross between, uh, Ross and Chandler on friends.
He was just (11:21) like this nebbishy goofball, um, nebbishy hipster goofball. And it's like, so they've kind of ran (11:29) with that for like the last shit, 26 years. So, but yeah, like I was just actually just thinking (11:35) when I first got into comics, Jubilee and Kitty pride were like my age.
We all would have been in (11:44) high school at the same time. Now I'm 52. Like, you know how weird it would be? It's like, (11:50) Hey, uh, uh, you, Oh, you like comics, right? Oh, what are your favorite characters? Kitty, (11:54) pride and Jubilee.
It's like, Ooh, that's kind of weird. Um, but, uh, but these guys, (12:01) they just hold onto Spider-Man and here's the deal. You're holding on Spider-Man.
He's not (12:06) holding onto you. Spider-Man is kind of a light, fun character with some tragic elements. He is (12:13) not a hero made for men in their fifties who hate everything.
One of my favorite defenses they go is (12:20) like crazy. Zach says, I hate everything, but I liked three things last year. Thousands of things (12:25) came out last year.
And the only things you liked were bland, safe, simple stories with white, (12:32) blonde men as the leads. You like F1. You like project Hail Mary.
You like night of the seven (12:3
kingdoms. You like a story where it's like, what if a white guy was okay at something and then he (12:44) got better? What if he was good? And then got even more good. Like no twists, no, no nuance.
(12:53) Just like we like when blonde men are good at things, but not in an exciting way, just kind of (12:59) in a calm, even way. Um, but anyway, these, uh, these bugs are driving me freaking crazy, but (13:05) yeah, Spider-Man has the worst fans. Oh, so quickly.
Okay. I'm gonna make this quick. Cause (13:10) these bugs are going freaking insane.
Um, uh, who has the best fans? It's going to be worried about (13:20) Sandra Bernhardt and Venom because it's the same one. It's Mexicans, Mexicans. I don't know what it (13:24) is.
Every Mexican guy I know loves Venom and love Sandra Bernhardt. You're like, Oh, 65 year old (13:32) Sandra Bernhardt. I don't know.
I will talk to Mexican guys who are 30 and they know who Sandra (13:3
Bernhardt, they freaking love Sandra Bernhardt. Um, so every, so like Venom fans are always cool. (13:45) You know, they're usually like mechanics.
Um, Punisher fans, Punisher fans are good. (13:51) Uh, Batman fans. I mean, that's a wide variety.
There's tons of, but I feel like even Batman fans (13:57) who are assholes when they're talking about Batman, they're like better. But yeah, like these (14:02) middle-aged Spider-Man fans, they are the fucking worst. Uh, anyway, thanks for watching.
Bye.
[SPOILER/]
Instead of planting a lot of seeds, I just cleared weeds, tilled soil, (0:21) and then I let the surrounding grass fill in the bald spots. But there's one where (0:26) like ants, this isn't just like an ant colony, it's like an ant camp Pendleton. Like, it's (0:32) a structure.
Underground, like the pit from G.I. Joe. So I put some ant killer, (0:40) where they, you know, it smells like food to them and they take it down into the (0:46) hive or whatever. But I see a bunch of birds eating it.
That can't be good. (0:51) Um, but anyway, so, um, great finale to, uh, Maul, uh, Shadow Lord Season 1. Excellent finale to, (1:01) uh, Daredevil Season 2 or 5 or 6, depending if you count Defenders. Um, and then, uh, uh, (1:13) but there's been a lot of talk about Spider-Man One More Day from 20 years ago.
Um, and, (1:21) uh, I'm, I'm kind of in a bad mood because I heard something and then I went to go confirm it. And, (1:2
So they got riled up. But (1:45) again, that was a couple of months ago, but it keeps getting brought up and it gets brought up (1:51) in the guise of, well, the reason I'm not, um, reading Marvel comics is because of One More Day. (1:5
So Spider-Man One More Day didn't (2:23) become more trenchant, you know, or it's just, it's really kind of revealed that the people (2:30) who were kind of hanging out during the, the, uh, culture war, they didn't want what they wanted. (2:39) They were pretending like, oh, let's get these wokies out of comics. But it's like, no, you (2:44) haven't read comics in 20 years, maybe 30.
Every time I see these guys bragging, like the goal (2:50) posts, it's like, I haven't watched a Star Wars movie in five years. I haven't watched the MCU in (2:55) 10 years. I haven't read a Marvel comic 20 years.
And then some guy throws down the trump card. (3:01) I can't read. It's like, they're, everyone's like jealous.
Like, oh, he got us. You will, (3:06) you won this round guy with Leonidas beard who complains about Disney princesses for a living. (3:14) Why do they all have these Leonidas beards to be the biggest pussies ever? I find it hilarious.
(3:19) Um, uh, but, um, anyway, so, so somebody comes to, I was like, you know, oh, you know, (3:27) one more day. And I was like, bro, you, you, if, if they wouldn't have broken up and broken up the (3:32) marriage, you would have some other excuse. Cause you guys always have another excuse (3:36) during the culture war.
It's the culture war. This is why I'm not reading culture war basically (3:40) ends. You're like, well, actually I'm not reading because of one more day.
It's like one more day (3:44) predated the culture war by like 10 years. Um, so this is what pissed me the off. So somebody in the (3:53) comments, they're like, yeah, they're always saying, you know, Peter Parker wouldn't have (3:57) made this decision, but it was actually Mary Jane.
And like, it was, I heard multiple sound (4:03) effects in my head at the same time. I heard the record scratch sound effect. I heard the (4:0
I was like, wait, hold up now. And it's always been like the same (4:15) guys. It's always these like in their fifties, dead Flanders.
I'm a nice guy guys. It's always (4:21) the guys who tell you what religion they are, but they don't show you. And I've just got to say (4:26) the worst, what character has the worst fans? It's not a contest.
It's spider by far by far. (4:37) So I went to, and it wasn't a fun experience. You know, when you wake up, your eyes aren't quite (4:42) clear.
I was like rage reading spider-man comics from 20 years ago and, and just like squinting (4:51) and like trying to read. Cause they're doing like a different font from Mephisto. And, um, (4:57) so first, so what I always hear, it's like, you know, Peter Parker's a hero.
He wouldn't have (5:01) his marriage. He didn't. It was Mary Jane.
It was Mary Jane. Now it was a lot more nuanced nuance (5:0
It was discussed between him and (5:15) Mary Jane. And then basically at the last moment, she just kind of leaned in and like whispered (5:19) some stuff to him and agreed to it under different conditions. Like, you know, uh, his identity, (5:25) which had been revealed has to be secret again.
You know, Aunt May just can't get killed like a (5:32) different way. A day later, uh, Peter is still Peter. He's still a good guy.
And it's like, (5:39) so you guys have been complaining for 20 years about a storyline that either you didn't read (5:46) or you don't remember accurately. Yeah. It's infuriating.
Um, but yeah, so I am freaking, (5:55) ah, this sucks. The bugs, we had a good few months, you know, so you could like work in the yard (6:00) without the bugs, but now they're just instantly upon you. Kind of reminds me of middle-aged (6:05) Spider-Man fans.
So when I say Spider-Man has the worst fans, I'm not talking about all his fans. (6:10) I'm talking about the people who being a Spider-Man fan is part of their personality or their (6:16) personality. Like I said, they're always the same.
They're always like these Ned Flanders. I'm a nice (6:20) guy guys. And it's like, I have every single issue in Mylar, but I've hated it for 20 years.
(6:26) Hey, perch, tell me, uh, I should keep collecting it. He's just like, I don't give a fuck, (6:31) collect it or don't collect it. Um, but one of the things I think, uh, I hate them for many reasons.
(6:3
I hate them, but I've been buying all their books for 20 years. It's like, (6:49) that's why you fuck. They have a guaranteed income source.
They're like, okay, no matter what (6:56) happens, what goes up, what goes down, what's popular, these fucking Ned Flanders dorks by (7:02) Spider-Man. That's why Dan Slott was on for 10 fucking years while he was telling you guys to (7:07) fuck off. Cause you still bought his books.
Um, but, um, yeah, so, uh, they're always, (7:15) they always say like, I've got every single issue. It's like, and then they go, but I haven't read (7:19) it in 50 years. Then why are you, why are you collecting it? And also, you know, uh, they've (7:2
I'm a nice guy, but they're always like the most bitter, petty, (7:34) hold onto grudges forever guys. They're actually, they are like, and they always see themselves in (7:40) Peter Parker. Like I'm just like Peter Parker.
It's like, you know what you are, but you're that (7:44) Ditko Parker, that asshole Parker. Go read the original few years of Spider-Man. Peter Parker (7:51) is not a likable guy.
You know, who's actually likable? Flash Thompson. Yeah. Flash Thompson's (7:57) a blowhard, but he's constantly, he's not just inviting Peter to hang out.
He's inviting Peter (8:05) to hang out with the cool crowd. And it's not like a Carrie thing where he's, you know, he's (8:0
(8:16) It's like, whatever Flash, you don't have the IQ to share a jalopy with me. And, um, but yeah, (8:24) so, uh, they're always like, I'm a nice guy. Then they buy stuff they hate.
Then they complain (8:2
I reverse engineered this story is just fine from (8:49) their complaints. They're like, why did this character make this decision? And this character (8:53) made a different decision. They're two different characters.
Why did the supporting character make (8:5
That's bad writing. It's like, Oh, (9:26) you are a tourist. Spider-Man specifically as a franchise has a long history.
I'm talking about (9:35) back to the Ditko days where they will have a whole storyline with a masked villain and not say (9:42) who it is. And sometimes they don't even know that's how you end up with like Ned Leeds being (9:49) hobgoblin. Like they just start a story with a hobgoblin, cool design.
Let's run with it. Oh, (9:54) it's doing well. And then they're like, Ooh, who's, who's the hobgoblin? They're like, (9:5
They're like, uh, we don't have any copyrighted characters named fuck if I know, (10:04) let's just make it Ned Leeds. It's like, look at fucking Ned Leeds. Um, but yeah, (10:0
And again, I'm talking about the ones in their (10:12) fifties because Spider-Man is a character for young people. He's a character for all people. (10:1
I'll go see it. But to really, really, really, (10:21) when I first started collecting comments, I was really into Spider-Man and yeah, I did. Oh, (10:26) he's just like me a bit, but you know what then happened? Then I became like 20 years old and I (10:33) was like, no, yeah.
At the time Spider-Man was like, you know, in his mid twenties in the story, (10:39) uh, in the continuity. But, um, there's some characters that age well, I think it's, (10:47) and I, and I was had a little talk with myself. It's like, well, why do I say this about Spider-Man? (10:51) But I don't say it about Daredevil.
Cause sometimes in the storyline he's presented like (10:55) in his like mid late twenties. And I think it's because Daredevil was like always so serious, (11:01) even when he was a kid, he was a serious. But the other thing is that Bendis like 25 years ago (11:07) decided that Parker was not, you know, the personality he had been from like 1970 to the (11:12) year 2000, but he was basically a cross between, uh, Ross and Chandler on friends.
He was just (11:21) like this nebbishy goofball, um, nebbishy hipster goofball. And it's like, so they've kind of ran (11:29) with that for like the last shit, 26 years. So, but yeah, like I was just actually just thinking (11:35) when I first got into comics, Jubilee and Kitty pride were like my age.
We all would have been in (11:44) high school at the same time. Now I'm 52. Like, you know how weird it would be? It's like, (11:50) Hey, uh, uh, you, Oh, you like comics, right? Oh, what are your favorite characters? Kitty, (11:54) pride and Jubilee.
It's like, Ooh, that's kind of weird. Um, but, uh, but these guys, (12:01) they just hold onto Spider-Man and here's the deal. You're holding on Spider-Man.
He's not (12:06) holding onto you. Spider-Man is kind of a light, fun character with some tragic elements. He is (12:13) not a hero made for men in their fifties who hate everything.
One of my favorite defenses they go is (12:20) like crazy. Zach says, I hate everything, but I liked three things last year. Thousands of things (12:25) came out last year.
And the only things you liked were bland, safe, simple stories with white, (12:32) blonde men as the leads. You like F1. You like project Hail Mary.
You like night of the seven (12:3
(12:53) Just like we like when blonde men are good at things, but not in an exciting way, just kind of (12:59) in a calm, even way. Um, but anyway, these, uh, these bugs are driving me freaking crazy, but (13:05) yeah, Spider-Man has the worst fans. Oh, so quickly.
Okay. I'm gonna make this quick. Cause (13:10) these bugs are going freaking insane.
Um, uh, who has the best fans? It's going to be worried about (13:20) Sandra Bernhardt and Venom because it's the same one. It's Mexicans, Mexicans. I don't know what it (13:24) is.
Every Mexican guy I know loves Venom and love Sandra Bernhardt. You're like, Oh, 65 year old (13:32) Sandra Bernhardt. I don't know.
I will talk to Mexican guys who are 30 and they know who Sandra (13:3
Um, Punisher fans, Punisher fans are good. (13:51) Uh, Batman fans. I mean, that's a wide variety.
There's tons of, but I feel like even Batman fans (13:57) who are assholes when they're talking about Batman, they're like better. But yeah, like these (14:02) middle-aged Spider-Man fans, they are the fucking worst. Uh, anyway, thanks for watching.
Bye.
[SPOILER/]