Circle the Wagons

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Basically this is all in aide of nothing, Null isn't producing any fucking balance sheets, we have no idea what "dire straits" the site is in and even a single donation of 1000 dollars might not be enough.

This is like an EMERGENCY DSP video, to be honest.

Edit: I know asking for evidence of financial distress is a very horrifying and Trumpian thing, but in this case I think it's necessary.

It's not like payment services drop this site like the plague or anything right? There's been what two or three this year so far?
 
Well, shit. I never thought I'd live to see the day LOLcows have enough power to legit threaten the Farms. I just began posting here after a few years of lurking but I stand by @Null

Forums are a dead medium ever since Social Media took off, this is the last one I come to and just now began participating, I don't want to see this hellhole die. For lack of a better word, the Farms are comfy, and I hope this site prevails over the delusions of an exceptional troon.
 
I'd like to point out that Null only needs 600 out of the 12000 registered to donate $3.36 a month. So really, for the cost of a cheese burger you can keep this site alive. I know once things settle back down for me I'll be happy to start donating. This has to be my third favorite site for laughing at people.
 
4chan is self hosted and has been since it started in moot's bedroom. 4chan has been down for short periods through its life and has even been temporarily blocked by two ISPs (one being Verizon) Null wants to self host, which will solve many of our problems.
Oh okay, thanks for explaining it. So Null wants to become Moot basically.
 
You could make the argument I should have shown people how bad this situation was for the last few months but I really couldn't. I can't tell people how well efforts to hurt our fundraising are. I can't really force people to donate for something they don't care about. The fact that even veteran uses like @Julius Evola somehow think that I'm fucking lying to people about what money is and how we can't actually fucking receive money is sort of evidence to me that I just need to pull the bandaid off and let Sam cum so that there is a chance of getting people to actually, finally figure out how to use Bitcoin so we can survive for another month.

Lets lay it out.

I am currently $7000 in debt.

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About $1000 of this is student debt that may be reimbursed by FASFA, so lets say, as of right now, I have $6000 in debt. This debt has been accumulating at about $1000 a month since I left home, where I was at A+ credit and $0 in debt. Lets go over my budget!!!

First, the good stuff! Lets take a look at income!

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A little over $1000 a month. Wow! That's a lot for doing nothing!, right? I mean I literally do nothing but play fucking video games while this site coasts along easy street. In fact.. we need some music for how easy running this site is.


That's some easy going music for an easy job!

Now lets take a look at expenses!

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A little over $1,7500 a month. Wow! That's a lot for doing -- well, nothing, right? Wait is that more than income!? That means it's a net loss! That's not easy!

But surely that's just stupid Nool being bad with money! It can't be justifiable. After all, Null has no idea how to manage finances and he has never lived off less than $900 a month in a third world country for almost an entire year. He doesn't know how to budget. So lets check the math, friends, and find the flaws.

Everything under Business Expenses is somehow tangentially related to the KF. This is a closer look.

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Everything under webhosting is directly related to the survival of the site. We don't just have one host, we have several. Things are thrown about all over the fucking place and they're different companies with different rates all the god damn time. So we're paying multiple times what a normal website this size would already be paying. We pay for Cloudflare every month, we pay for multiple VPS services, but then we have backup services. Cloud backups of the main site and database? That's an extra $50 a month. We also have a lot of hidden VPSs that are not really related to the site directly. I keep a Git system on a VPS that costs an extra $10/mo because I can't use Github for anything KF related. The VPSs in Europe I use for Lolcow.TV and Lolcow.Email are an additional 40 euros a month. Normal sites don't have to host their own Git and they don't have to host their own email, but I do, and I can't use the main KF setup for those things because we need redundancy and whatever server you put the email server on is IP vulnerable.

Legal expenses are incorporation costs, virtualized agents, and virtualized offices, shit like that. Lots of misc expenses involved just to appease the feds. Did I mention I pay fucking taxes? Because I fucking do. I have to mark certain things personal spending, so my $425/mo in rent is split between personal and company sending, and that is only half deductible as an expense. So as the KF's income marginally covers its corporate spending, I have to pay taxes on what is left.

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$125 in taxes this year. Probably could get away not paying it, but you know what? I can't risk it. I got people after me and I keep my nose clean.

The rest goes straight to credit card. My food? Card. I bought new shoes recently; my old ones were so worn there was a hole bore through the sole and I was stepping on rocks. That goes on the card.

Maybe I could cut some shit, stop drinking soda. But you know what? For every dollar I make, 25 cents of it goes to the KF, and 25 cents of it goes to rent. When the server stops working at 2am, I get phone calls, and I wake up. I drink some soda and drop another $30 on swapping out a dead VPS provider and monitor it for the next few hours. It's just how I do.

I am not bad with money. There was a time I even made money.

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And that money I made is still there. In a savings account. For a rainy day. For a plane ticket to the Ukraine, if I need it And if I go so far into debt I cannot continue doing this, and I cannot convince this community to give a shit about the fact there is a real human being attached to the metal servers and that human being eats and almost all of his waking hours is spent on hawking this shit, then that's it. I have no choice. I have to take that money out, pay off that debt, and leave it behind. I've only even managed to get this far because I provide my IT shit in exchange for special help from people around me. If I had to present cash money for some shit right now I'd be fucked.

I can change my name in a day. I receive death threats constantly so the court would seal the case, no problem. I could move on in a fucking nanosecond, but I don't, because it's worth it. Because I'd RATHER BE FUCKING DEAD THAN GO BACK TO WORKING TIMESHEETS.

and now, remember @Julius Evola: if y'all gave just one dolla a month, i'd never have ta ask for money again *snort*.
 
You could make the argument I should have shown people how bad this situation was for the last few months but I really couldn't. I can't tell people how well efforts to hurt our fundraising are. I can't really force people to donate for something they don't care about.
Personally I don't think you're fucking up with how you handle money.

I see someone trying to sustain a cash flow model that's not currently viable. Sites have a hard time staying afloat even if donations are just used for site expenses and donations are available through normal methods like Paypal and Patreon.

Trying to keep this bloated back end monster afloat AND pay your living expenses when the only reliable method of donating is through bitcoin is a hard road to try and pave.
 
Trying to keep this bloated back end monster afloat AND pay your living expenses when the only reliable method of donating is through bitcoin is a hard road to try and pave.
It's incredibly hard, which is why I'm trying to start up the VPS idea. I dont even know if it'll work, or for how long, but I'm trying.

Honestly I'd love to donate more to the site but last time we went down, Samuel was demanding names. Is bitcoin a 100% anonymous way to donate? I'd like to look into it more when I'm home if it is.
Depends on what level of anonymity you're looking for. Anything you use a card on can be traced with proper authority. Even with Coinmama, they're going to have a TX record, so will the bank you used.

Will I? Absolutely not. It's not possible for an unprivileged person to know. The transaction is anonymous as far as the recipient is concerned. Even if Sam murdered me with an ax and shuffled through all my documents there'd be no way to find out.
 
I checked out a few other sites during our last hiatus, and holy shit were they terrible. Unbridled autism, lil pecker waving and shitty interface. I feared I would have to up this silly dream of being mean on the Internet. This joint is the best at what we do, and may we never see it's like again.

Some of you guys have cracked me up, pissed me off or made me think. The content here is has entertained me more then any show or film, and I hope I can keep up with this site for years to come. @Null has done great work in the face of extreme autism and spite, his fortitude and sacrifice is impressive. He's a good fucking lad, and I'll buy him a drink and give him a straight-guy hand job, hell, I'll even make eye contact.

Semper fucking Fi you kiwis, I'll see you on the beach..

Also, hey Null, are you going to wear your MAGA cuck hat when you're forced to become a political refugee in a third world country?

Aaaayyyyy I'm just kidding with ya, fam
 
I mostly lurk but I really do want this site to stay up, I've been here since the whole PK drama and haven't left since. Once I figure out bitcoin either today or tomorrow I'll donate for sure, I see this as similar to paying for entertainment in general after all, it's the least I could do for all the content I've gotten out of this site.
 
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