UK British News Megathread - aka CWCissey's news thread

https://news.sky.com/story/row-over-new-greggs-vegan-sausage-rolls-heats-up-11597679 (https://archive.ph/5Ba6o)

A heated row has broken out over a move by Britain's largest bakery chain to launch a vegan sausage roll.

The pastry, which is filled with a meat substitute and encased in 96 pastry layers, is available in 950 Greggs stores across the country.

It was promised after 20,000 people signed a petition calling for the snack to be launched to accommodate plant-based diet eaters.


But the vegan sausage roll's launch has been greeted by a mixed reaction: Some consumers welcomed it, while others voiced their objections.

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spread happiness@p4leandp1nk
https://twitter.com/p4leandp1nk/status/1080767496569974785

#VEGANsausageroll thanks Greggs

7
10:07 AM - Jan 3, 2019
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Cook and food poverty campaigner Jack Monroe declared she was "frantically googling to see what time my nearest opens tomorrow morning because I will be outside".

While TV writer Brydie Lee-Kennedy called herself "very pro the Greggs vegan sausage roll because anything that wrenches veganism back from the 'clean eating' wellness folk is a good thing".

One Twitter user wrote that finding vegan sausage rolls missing from a store in Corby had "ruined my morning".

Another said: "My son is allergic to dairy products which means I can't really go to Greggs when he's with me. Now I can. Thank you vegans."

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pg often@pgofton
https://twitter.com/pgofton/status/1080772793774624768

The hype got me like #Greggs #Veganuary

42
10:28 AM - Jan 3, 2019
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TV presenter Piers Morgan led the charge of those outraged by the new roll.

"Nobody was waiting for a vegan bloody sausage, you PC-ravaged clowns," he wrote on Twitter.

Mr Morgan later complained at receiving "howling abuse from vegans", adding: "I get it, you're all hangry. I would be too if I only ate plants and gruel."

Another Twitter user said: "I really struggle to believe that 20,000 vegans are that desperate to eat in a Greggs."

"You don't paint a mustach (sic) on the Mona Lisa and you don't mess with the perfect sausage roll," one quipped.

Journalist Nooruddean Choudry suggested Greggs introduce a halal steak bake to "crank the fume levels right up to 11".

The bakery chain told concerned customers that "change is good" and that there would "always be a classic sausage roll".

It comes on the same day McDonald's launched its first vegetarian "Happy Meal", designed for children.

The new dish comes with a "veggie wrap", instead of the usual chicken or beef option.

It should be noted that Piers Morgan and Greggs share the same PR firm, so I'm thinking this is some serious faux outrage and South Park KKK gambiting here.

 

[Duane Dibbley]

People will never give up their dogs, no one will stop owning dogs because some paki got offended.

"We're a nation of drinkers" - they said as the pubs closed without incident, without warning, for 'two weeks'.

"We're a nation of dog owners" - they said as fido was boxed up and sent to S.Korea.

I don't believe in "this is a line we won't cross". There is no line anymore. The dogs will be minced into sheep food and most will comply. Those who don't will be brow-beat by the NPCs who follow in lockstep.

Don't forget to clap on your doorstep at 8pm on Thursday for all of the busy veterinarians.

 

[Morethanabitfoolish]

I love that these two are literally right next to each other. The far right? You mean like those people that want to turn the country into a far right ultra conservative theocracy and their entire belief system involves completely decimating the rights of women?

There's quite a few funny pairings, made more hilarious because as @>IMPLYING points out more than than a few are the same ones with a different hat.

Muslim Council of Britain

Bakers, Food and Allied Workers Union

It'd better be halal!

Indian Workers Association (IWA)

Jewish Socialists Group

Socialists and Workers, natural allies.

National Union of Mineworkers

National Women’s Action for Positive Change

"Tha'll be going down t'pit then Mildred?"

The Cordoba Foundation

Literally defined by the UAE as a terrorist group. Even Wikipedia points out the current leader has supported Hamas and their methods.

https://archive.ph/MjuN4

In a video recorded in November, 2023, Altikriti was asked about the Gaza war hostage crisis.

He said: “The taking of hostages is a very important part of any strategic sort of military action or act of resistance or the such because for every hostage you can then negotiate. You have personnel who are vital and crucial at least in your thinking and your mind to your adversary, to your enemy, so it’s a negotiating power". He similarly denied that Hamas raped Israeli women, calling the allegations "a lie"

Women's Inclusive Team

Muslim Community Association

Your joke repeated.

Tower Hamlets Trade Union Council

It's Tower Hamlets

North Staffs Miners' Wives Action Group

Period Power

Mildred's not going down the pits today

Women's International League for Peace and Freedom

The Labour Muslim Network

Your joke repeated.

REFUGEE WORKERS CULTURAL ASSOCIATION

Out-Out Groups UK

Out-out is an LGBTQ+ organisation group, Queers for Palestine joke goes here.

LGBT Youth Scotland

Pick a Kiwi Farms article about them.

Students' Federation of India - United Kingdom

TransActual

Not In Our Name (NION) Women

*heavy sigh*

Beyond Detention

Network for Police Monitoring (Netpol)

Joke writes itself

Day Mer

Day-Mer Turkish and Kurdish Community Centre

This would actually appear to be the same one twice.

I'd keep going but it's getting depressing. It's also worth noting that a massive number of these are organisations expressly supported by interests outside of the UK fucking with our politics. Given the faux outrage over Musk you'd expect at least acknowledgement of that.

 

[Tom Nook's Gloryhole]

We have a king? I think that charles bloke prefers the title of imam actually.

I've mentioned this in the past to a bunch of friends and colleagues but honestly it feels really fucking weird that the Queen has been dead for like 4 years now and yet everyone is still under the weird foggy haze that she's still alive and the Queen. Charles immediately came in, discovered he had cancer and basically went radio silent for ages apart from when he has something to say.

It's like he's actually afraid of being out in public or something. I only remember we have a king whenever I have to take out a loan to buy a pack of first class stamps, and even then there's still TONS of books I buy that still have the Queen on years later.

It doesn't help that it feels like we only just changed from the paper fivers and tenners and then the Queen died so there's tons and tons of money in circulation that still has the Queen's face on.

 

[femboy fart huffer]

Literally defined by the UAE as a terrorist group

Damn I knew Italians got a bit defensive but I didn't know they were this passionate about carbonara?

It's Tower Hamlets

Is that what they call midgets in the pig world?

still under the weird foggy haze that she's still alive and the Queen.

A couple days ago here I mentioned HMP Parkhurst. My mind instantly went oh yea Her Majesty's prison. Like yea I know we have a king but even then I'll just say Queen anyway, they're about as useful in their current state as each other anyway.

 

[Brahma]

"We're a nation of drinkers" - they said as the pubs closed without incident, without warning, for 'two weeks'.

"We're a nation of dog owners" - they said as fido was boxed up and sent to S.Korea.

I don't believe in "this is a line we won't cross". There is no line anymore. The dogs will be minced into sheep food and most will comply. Those who don't will be brow-beat by the NPCs who follow in lockstep.

Don't forget to clap on your doorstep at 8pm on Thursday for all of the busy veterinarians.

It won't be an outright ban, It'll be some combination of public health and animal welfare imo. Something like banning them on the streets due to shit, mandating minumum garden access, that kind of shit.

They'll just make it immeasurably difficult to have one.

 

[Chunky Salsa]

It won't be an outright ban, It'll be some combination of public health and animal welfare imo. Something like banning them on the streets due to shit, mandating minumum garden access, that kind of shit.

They'll just make it immeasurably difficult to have one.

Yeah, it'll be a ratchet effect, yet again. No one is going to say "I am going to shoot a police officer because I can't walk my dog past 5pm."

 

[Miriam Margoyles]

Just as the the thought occurs to me... How many people are killed by dog attacks in the UK every year? And how many are killed by acts of Islamic terrorism?

Because I think I might've just found the perfect riposte to the 'Is Britain too dog-friendly?' question.

 

[Chunky Salsa]

I purchased some mini rolls from Lidl. I bit into one. They taste like plastic, like, actual fucking plastic. Disgusting.

 

[femboy fart huffer]

Just as the the thought occurs to me... How many people are killed by dog attacks in the UK every year? And how many are killed by acts of Islamic terrorism?

Well obviously there are going to be more people killed by dogs each year.

No one in this country dies from 'islamic terrorism'? That's just a misunderstood person trying to express themselves and their religion. That's not terrorism they just forgot which pedal was the break or accidentally put the suicide vest on. You're not going to get a proper number for that exact reason. Was that obvious terror attack on the mancuian jew building even classed as a terror attack?

 

[Chunky Salsa]

Google says 3-5 by dogs a year, but 2023 was weirdly bloody, with 16 killed.

 

[Overly Serious]

I've mentioned this in the past to a bunch of friends and colleagues but honestly it feels really fucking weird that the Queen has been dead for like 4 years now and yet everyone is still under the weird foggy haze that she's still alive and the Queen. Charles immediately came in, discovered he had cancer and basically went radio silent for ages apart from when he has something to say.

Had a woman in the supermarket talking to me just last week about the queen in present tense. Wasn't a super elderly person either, just mid-Fifties I'd guess. But it had plainly slipped her mind that it was King Charles now. It's still surreal turning over a note and seeing his face staring back at me.

 

[Heinrich Maneuver]

I purchased some mini rolls from Lidl. I bit into one. They taste like plastic, like, actual fucking plastic. Disgusting.

the pork chops from lidl always tasted like actual rubber.

Seems to be a lot kicking off today
Major police presence at Rossett Hall Hotel

BREAKING NOW – ROSSETT HALL HOTEL INCIDENT (LATEST UPDATE 7:05PM)

Reports are coming in tonight of a major police presence at Rossett Hall Hotel.Around 10 police vehicles are said to be at the scene, including armed response units, alongside a dog unit and an ambulance.Witnesses claim officers were seen entering with battering rams, suggesting a serious incident is unfolding.Local councillor Hugh Jones has confirmed he is aware of the situation, but no official details have been released yet.This is ongoing. Updates to follow.

Police are reportedly now leaving the scene. There are unconfirmed eyewitness reports that a man has been detained.More details are expected as North Wales Police and Rossett Hall Hotel comment on the situation.

OP is not aware if the hotel is a migrant hotel, but that one 'around the corner' is likely a migrant hotel.


Stabbing in West Hampstead

Stabbing in west hampstead five guys. Major police presence

There are also multiple videos circulating of youths storming and robbing a Marks and Spencers in Clapham

 

[femboy fart huffer]

Seems to be a lot kicking off today

Normally I'd say Winter ends when the daffodils flower. I guess in good old multicultural England we have a new way of knowing when Winter is over?

 

[Morethanabitfoolish]

Normally I'd say Winter ends when the daffodils flower. I guess in good old multicultural England we have a new way of knowing when Winter is over?

Nah, the dates of Ramadan move each year.

Something the average white HR/senior management twit is ignorant of as they bleat about the wonders of this spring festival in between talking about how it's a shame Christianity does not have any fasting traditions.

 

[Kofi Drinka]

Lost my Chocolate Lab 2 years ago. One of my favourite memories of him was walking around a corner to find 4 black kids playing in an alley. I don't think my dog had ever seen a black person before, he started barking at them. I thought to myself "my dog is racist" and found the idea hilarious. So all these black kids saw was a dog walker come up to them with the dog going mental and the walker laughing like a psycho.

Sorry to hear that. I lost a dog about the same time and I still miss her. Dogs are bros for life, gone but never forgotten. They're also racist. They read character well and darkies upset them. I never tell my dog off for barking at foreigners.

Was in town tonight doing some shopping. Come out of Tesco and there's a guy standing in the road staring at his coat.. Just staring at his coat in the middle of the road. Completely off his face staring. Welcome to the UK. Where drug addicts stare at coats on a main road.

 

[Johnny Dipp]

Sorry to hear that. I lost a dog about the same time and I still miss her. Dogs are bros for life, gone but never forgotten. They're also racist. They read character well and darkies upset them. I never tell my dog off for barking at foreigners.

Was in town tonight doing some shopping. Come out of Tesco and there's a guy standing in the road staring at his coat.. Just staring at his coat in the middle of the road. Completely off his face staring. Welcome to the UK. Where drug addicts stare at coats on a main road.

Sorry for your loss too. Ordering food was always funny. Brown man shows up holding a pizza and is shocked and confused that two Labradors are very interested in him. I started getting texts before they arrived to "secure any pets" which I ignored. I delivered Pizza for a while and meeting peoples Dogs was the highlight of the job for me.

 

[Kofi Drinka]

I delivered Pizza for a while and meeting peoples Dogs was the highlight of the job for me.

Meeting new dogs is always cool. I've never been scared of them in any way and they seem to like me well enough. good breed of dog there, none of this small yappy crap of pitbull stuff. There's plenty of good sized dogs suitable to be around children who protect the house. Getting some yappy shit box or a big nasty dog always seems dumb to me. Not like you can even play fetch with a yappy thing. If it picked up a ball it would choke.

 

[bra stacks 2.0]

Explain. I knew there was a reason Janet Street Porter looked the way she does.

Norman "Normski" Anderson (the spade) was shacking up with JSP while she was head of youth programming at BBC2.

 

[SIMIΔN]

I don't think my [chocolate lab] had ever seen a black person before, he started barking at them.

Maybe he was just surprise hoomannns come in his shade too.

Something the average white HR/senior management twit is ignorant of as they bleat about the wonders of this spring festival in between talking about how it's a shame Christianity does not have any fasting traditions.

Ramadan is basically skipping lunch. Meanwhile Lent is a real sacrifice, and thats not to mention Orthodox and monastic fasting.

 

[BongoMongo]

Sorry for your loss too. Ordering food was always funny. Brown man shows up holding a pizza and is shocked and confused that two Labradors are very interested in him. I started getting texts before they arrived to "secure any pets" which I ignored. I delivered Pizza for a while and meeting peoples Dogs was the highlight of the job for me.

I was a postie a long time back (back when bike based routes were the norm. Damn those were good days) and I loved my customers dogs. Like you it was a real highlight for me. No matter how I was feeling,they were always excited to see me.

On an unrelated note,does anyone know of that company, Hoyer? They deliver petrol and diesel to petrol stations. I've just seen one of their tankers being followed by a half dozen cars, obviously wanting fuel from wherever he's dropping off. Stupid thing is,we filled up at weekend. No issues there.

I've a feeling in me waters - and it's not cystitis,ta very much- that we'll see some shenanigans come the local elections. I don't think labour will come out of it feeling especially bolstered and I think they'll fuck about because of it.

One of labour candidates near us is now independent having been asked to leave labour for mysterious reasons. He's a nice enough fellow and a very good councillor. He has time for everyone and is extremely proactive, and in general, is well liked because of this. I hope he does well because a good councillor can make a big difference.