UK British News Megathread - aka CWCissey's news thread

https://news.sky.com/story/row-over-new-greggs-vegan-sausage-rolls-heats-up-11597679 (https://archive.ph/5Ba6o)

A heated row has broken out over a move by Britain's largest bakery chain to launch a vegan sausage roll.

The pastry, which is filled with a meat substitute and encased in 96 pastry layers, is available in 950 Greggs stores across the country.

It was promised after 20,000 people signed a petition calling for the snack to be launched to accommodate plant-based diet eaters.


But the vegan sausage roll's launch has been greeted by a mixed reaction: Some consumers welcomed it, while others voiced their objections.

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spread happiness@p4leandp1nk
https://twitter.com/p4leandp1nk/status/1080767496569974785

#VEGANsausageroll thanks Greggs

7
10:07 AM - Jan 3, 2019
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Cook and food poverty campaigner Jack Monroe declared she was "frantically googling to see what time my nearest opens tomorrow morning because I will be outside".

While TV writer Brydie Lee-Kennedy called herself "very pro the Greggs vegan sausage roll because anything that wrenches veganism back from the 'clean eating' wellness folk is a good thing".

One Twitter user wrote that finding vegan sausage rolls missing from a store in Corby had "ruined my morning".

Another said: "My son is allergic to dairy products which means I can't really go to Greggs when he's with me. Now I can. Thank you vegans."

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pg often@pgofton
https://twitter.com/pgofton/status/1080772793774624768

The hype got me like #Greggs #Veganuary

42
10:28 AM - Jan 3, 2019
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TV presenter Piers Morgan led the charge of those outraged by the new roll.

"Nobody was waiting for a vegan bloody sausage, you PC-ravaged clowns," he wrote on Twitter.

Mr Morgan later complained at receiving "howling abuse from vegans", adding: "I get it, you're all hangry. I would be too if I only ate plants and gruel."

Another Twitter user said: "I really struggle to believe that 20,000 vegans are that desperate to eat in a Greggs."

"You don't paint a mustach (sic) on the Mona Lisa and you don't mess with the perfect sausage roll," one quipped.

Journalist Nooruddean Choudry suggested Greggs introduce a halal steak bake to "crank the fume levels right up to 11".

The bakery chain told concerned customers that "change is good" and that there would "always be a classic sausage roll".

It comes on the same day McDonald's launched its first vegetarian "Happy Meal", designed for children.

The new dish comes with a "veggie wrap", instead of the usual chicken or beef option.

It should be noted that Piers Morgan and Greggs share the same PR firm, so I'm thinking this is some serious faux outrage and South Park KKK gambiting here.

 

[femboy fart huffer]

My parent's massive shepherd used to love plonking his head exactly 1 inch from roaring woodpiles, never so much as singed himself , fire is rightly spooky but if you do it right (using a proper burner, having a bucket of sand, cleaning the damn thing etc) it's surprisingly difficult to go wrong even when foolish children stick their hands in the damn thing.

Yea it's just the idea that idk she wags her tail and it smacks into the fire and then she rolls around and it spreads. Or that she'd knock something into the fire that would then travel along that thing and spread to the rest of the room. Incredibly dumb shit that realistically are just paranoid delusions and are almost physically impossible. But at the same time I don't have 'oh well ill just buy another house' money. I think maybe just from family smoking, you'd look at the chair and there'd be burn spots on the arm where they'd dropped the fag or instinctively tried to stub it in an ash tray they moved. Like yea if you did that in a slightly different way you would have no house. Plus our bedroom has a load of shit that is genuinely irreplaceable and that would be the only room you could put a fireplace in and it make sense.

We can have a pissing contest.

I believe I only have to say

 

[Morethanabitfoolish]

Because the ground wouldn’t hold him.

There's a none-zero chance that'll happen anyway, some things even dirt wouldn't touch.

Blair's getting burned and scattered. They know what would happen to his grave and allowing one of the WEF's chosen children to be put to rest anywhere without armed guards is asking for it to see more shit than most crop fields.

 

[Otterly]

Blair's getting burned and scattered.

Alas only after his death at 105 after a life of undue luxury power and wealth , but never mind. I’m sure there’s a nice warm place for him to spend eternity.

 

[femboy fart huffer]

Blair's getting burned and scattered.

Are we talking in terms of cremation or witch?

 

[Morethanabitfoolish]

Alas only after his death at 105 after a life of undue luxury power and wealth , but never mind. I’m sure there’s a nice warm place for him to spend eternity.

It'll be a range of temperatures, Satan wouldn't want him to get comfortable.

Speaking of people who did their damage and left before the consequences could arrive.

https://archive.ph/VET4h

Nicola Sturgeon, the nationalist firebrand who dominated Scottish politics for almost a decade, has bowed out with an emotional valedictory speech.

Addressing the Scottish parliament for the final time, the former first minister said it was a wrench to leave Holyrood, but the time was right to move on.


She was elected to the newly devolved parliament in 1999, and was Scotland's first minister from 2014 until she quit in 2023 amid a Scottish National Party (SNP) financial scandal - but was later cleared.

"I've been here for 27 years - that's almost exactly half my life," she said in her farewell speech. "So even though the time is right to move on, I won't pretend that leaving isn't a wrench. It is."

She was the political protege of Alex Salmond, and served as his deputy from 2007 until she succeeded him as first minister after the SNP lost the 2014 independence referendum.


But they fell out in a spectacular feud linked to allegations of sexual harassment against him. He was later acquitted, but she was not invited to his funeral when he died in 2024.

The high point of her career came when she led the SNP to a landslide in Scotland in the 2015 UK general election, when her party won 56 of the 59 Scottish seats at Westminster.

At the time, she was one of the most formidable campaigners in British politics, and ruled her party with an iron discipline, aided by her husband, Peter Murrell, who was the SNP's chief executive.

But in 2023, Police Scotland launched a fraud inquiry over SNP cash, raised for independence campaigning, that it was alleged was used to buy a £125,000 camper van and luxury items.

The pair, who first met in 1988, became a couple in 2003 and married in 2010, but separated in 2025. He was charged with embezzlement and is due to appear at Edinburgh High Court in May.


In her emotional speech which saw her wipe away tears, Ms Sturgeon said during her time in Holyrood she had seen politics change almost beyond recognition "and not always for the better".

She said she accepted a share of responsibility for that but, in offering her parting thoughts, said MSPs must not take the parliament for granted.

And despite being seen as tribal during her SNP leadership, she said politicians should make friends in other parties, adding: "Opponents need not be enemies."

Offering advice as she signed off as an MSP, she said: "No matter the depths of your loyalty to your own political tribe, don't forget to think for yourself.

"Keep a sense of perspective, you know if everything is a scandal or an outrage, nothing is. And then those who deserve to be held to account, they get off scot-free."


And despite having 1.3 followers on X, nearly 450,000 on Facebook and 130,000 on Instagram, she warned: "Don't live life on social media.

"Use it, but never forget there is a real world out there and it is the people in it you are here to serve.

"And, finally, every day you walk through these doors and into this magnificent chamber, remember that it is a privilege, a rare privilege.

"For 27 years it has been my privilege, one that I must now draw to a close."

The unmitigated gall of her.

Are we talking in terms of cremation or witch?

The former alas

 

[femboy fart huffer]

Speaking of people who did their damage and left before the consequences could arrive.

Honestly I know nothing about her. But how the fuck do you have a 27 year long political career? It's just reminding me of Farage and Thatcher with how they just fucking kept existing despite the average lifespan of a politician being rather fittingly about the same as a fruitfly.

I hope she has a good retirement being milked for eggs for Russian oligarchs to eat I guess? Like fucking come on Alex Salmon and Nickola Sturgeon? Are we running a Scotland or a fucking sushi bar? My favourite brand of salmon jerky just ceased to exist or some shit a while ago and I'm still kinda sad about it honestly, nothing even comes close.

 

[Morethanabitfoolish]

Honestly I know nothing about her. But how the fuck do you have a 27 year long political career?

39 years and counting.

 

[Kofi Drinka]

Hmm, well if you say so. But if you’re feeling bad, reach out. I know we all snipe at each other but if you need a rant, you can rant at us.

I've been working on a big life change for a few years, about six months ago it became a "Get this done now or give up on it" situation. And it's basically hit that deadline. Some stuff is out of my hands, so it's very frustrating. Spring is here, it's time to come out of our bogs and caves to explore the world and enjoy the harvest. And those two things don't mix well.

Thank you everyone for the kind words.


Here is a picture of Dizzy to remind us all we're old. Back in our day games came on a tape and you measured loading times in how long it took to boil a kettle and make a cup of tea,

I wouldn't piss on Tony's face. He seems like the type to enjoy such things. Might write "big eared twat" on his grave stone though.

 

[femboy fart huffer]

View attachment 8755249
39 years and counting.

Glad to see the chef from Tracy Beaker is doing good at least. Don't remember him coming out as trans but hey it is what it is (male).

 

[Vesperus]

Yea it's just the idea that idk she wags her tail and it smacks into the fire and then she rolls around and it spreads.

You need a fireguard. Stops sparks coming out and dogs going in: also looks a bit tidier in summer when you're not using it.
Ideally you want a nice one that goes with the decor, but you can get boring mesh ones from Amazon for 20-30 quid, and you'll save that in heating costs very quickly.

 

[Morethanabitfoolish]

Ideally you want a nice one that goes with the decor, but you can get boring mesh ones from Amazon for 20-30 quid, and you'll save that in heating costs very quickly.

Car boots or antique shops might also yield them but they're not as common as you might think.

 

[Overly Serious]

Blair's getting burned and scattered. They know what would happen to his grave and allowing one of the WEF's chosen children to be put to rest anywhere without armed guards is asking for it to see more shit than most crop fields.

Marshmallows it is, then!

View attachment 875524939 years and counting.

Counting is the last thing Dianne Abbot should be allowed to do!

(Though even her maths is probably second to the glorious clanger of "On the whole, Chairman Mao probably did more good than bad." )

Here is a picture of Dizzy to remind us all we're old. Back in our day games came on a tape and you measured loading times in how long it took to boil a kettle and make a cup of tea,

Just for you mate!

 

[GratsTheat783]

Opinions on the PMQs today, especially on the part of Reform walking out? It was definitely pre-planned no matter what they say, but Starmer's constant dodging of questions. or countering with his own, has gotten really annoying and made it pointless to pay attention to. Also, opinions on the new financial rules for parties? I think they're stopping crypto donations and limiting donations to 100k.

 

[Clem Fandango]

Here is a picture of Dizzy to remind us all we're old. Back in our day games came on a tape and you measured loading times in how long it took to boil a kettle and make a cup of tea,

My brother had a Commodore 64 with the tape deck back in the day! Can't remember many of the games, but we definitely had that AWFUL Ghostbusters game. Could never figure out how to make any progress.

Opinions on the PMQs today, especially on the part of Reform walking out? It was definitely pre-planned no matter what they say, but Starmer's constant dodging of questions. or countering with his own, has gotten really annoying and made it pointless to pay attention to.

I don't think anyone cares if Farage and Co walk out during PMQs. It doesn't really do anything, does it?

I agree that Kier's new thing of asking his own question in reply is annoying. That's not really what PMQs is for. Could the Speaker remind him that he's there to answer questions, not ask them?

 

[SirCliveSinclairdabbing]

View attachment 8755282

“Ride the torrents, dodge the trolls”

So far ahead of its times…

 

[Kofi Drinka]

My brother had a Commodore 64 with the tape deck back in the day! Can't remember many of the games, but we definitely had that AWFUL Ghostbusters game. Could never figure out how to make any progress.

It's the same game on the master system if you want to try it now. It had some weird way to unlock the final boss then you go fight it. I was a C64 kid. I've still got it in the cupboard but I would emulate it these days.

 

[femboy fart huffer]

You need a fireguard.

I mean tbf first I would need a fireplace to put it on.

Opinions on the PMQs today

People actually watch pmqt? Even if we had actual humans running the country I never cared, let alone the retard who seems to have forgotten he's not meant to be a lawyer anymore with how much he plays the 'my client does not wish to answer that question' type shit.

 

[Morethanabitfoolish]

Counting is the last thing Dianne Abbot should be allowed to do!

I do feel sorry for her at times. Dianne had some wit about her a while ago but at this point Labour have been making her into their "capable black woman" puppet for at least a decade past the point she could manage it.

 

[femboy fart huffer]

I know literally nothing about him but I think we should have more Nick Cleggs in politics. I think that if the news was full of whatever the fuck the English version of a glup shitto is then I would maybe at least be able to disassociate from reality and just laugh at the name. I want Westminster to just be like playing rimworld. I think new rule if your name is not able to blend in with an Atomic Shrimp alias then you should be fired. If I open the 2027 ballot and there's not some bald white man that looks straight out of ThisPersonDoesNotExist on there called like Richard Blott or something then I'm just fucking eating the ballot. I do have practice and I will not hesitate to channel my inner dyslexic and treat that as a buffet box if they test me. Shabana Mahmood should be allowed to stay but only on the express condition that she is only ever allowed to be seen in public in a mammoth outfit. I want a version of islam but instead of a burka it's an Ice Age cosplay, Kier can stay too if he's Sid but with the exception that all of the Eastern European twinks he fucks also have to do a Sid cosplay and worship him as a god like the end of one of the films.

 

[Chunky Salsa]

New Archbishop got sworn in.

1:35

Whole thing disgusted me.