UK British News Megathread - aka CWCissey's news thread

https://news.sky.com/story/row-over-new-greggs-vegan-sausage-rolls-heats-up-11597679 (https://archive.ph/5Ba6o)

A heated row has broken out over a move by Britain's largest bakery chain to launch a vegan sausage roll.

The pastry, which is filled with a meat substitute and encased in 96 pastry layers, is available in 950 Greggs stores across the country.

It was promised after 20,000 people signed a petition calling for the snack to be launched to accommodate plant-based diet eaters.


But the vegan sausage roll's launch has been greeted by a mixed reaction: Some consumers welcomed it, while others voiced their objections.

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spread happiness@p4leandp1nk
https://twitter.com/p4leandp1nk/status/1080767496569974785

#VEGANsausageroll thanks Greggs

7
10:07 AM - Jan 3, 2019
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Cook and food poverty campaigner Jack Monroe declared she was "frantically googling to see what time my nearest opens tomorrow morning because I will be outside".

While TV writer Brydie Lee-Kennedy called herself "very pro the Greggs vegan sausage roll because anything that wrenches veganism back from the 'clean eating' wellness folk is a good thing".

One Twitter user wrote that finding vegan sausage rolls missing from a store in Corby had "ruined my morning".

Another said: "My son is allergic to dairy products which means I can't really go to Greggs when he's with me. Now I can. Thank you vegans."

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pg often@pgofton
https://twitter.com/pgofton/status/1080772793774624768

The hype got me like #Greggs #Veganuary

42
10:28 AM - Jan 3, 2019
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TV presenter Piers Morgan led the charge of those outraged by the new roll.

"Nobody was waiting for a vegan bloody sausage, you PC-ravaged clowns," he wrote on Twitter.

Mr Morgan later complained at receiving "howling abuse from vegans", adding: "I get it, you're all hangry. I would be too if I only ate plants and gruel."

Another Twitter user said: "I really struggle to believe that 20,000 vegans are that desperate to eat in a Greggs."

"You don't paint a mustach (sic) on the Mona Lisa and you don't mess with the perfect sausage roll," one quipped.

Journalist Nooruddean Choudry suggested Greggs introduce a halal steak bake to "crank the fume levels right up to 11".

The bakery chain told concerned customers that "change is good" and that there would "always be a classic sausage roll".

It comes on the same day McDonald's launched its first vegetarian "Happy Meal", designed for children.

The new dish comes with a "veggie wrap", instead of the usual chicken or beef option.

It should be noted that Piers Morgan and Greggs share the same PR firm, so I'm thinking this is some serious faux outrage and South Park KKK gambiting here.

 

[Smyrna]

Burnham has written to the NEC asking for permission to be selected as Labour's candidate in Gorton. The ball is now in the NEC's court.

 

[The Green Man]

Just a quick point of fact - Suella Braverman is Buddhist, not Hindu. Her husband Rael is Jewish and already a member of Reform.

Not news as such but this moving portrait of Ed Milliband made from a recent interview is currently getting some mileage on X as an 'if only you knew how bad things really are' react. He looks like a large primate showing flickers of near-human cognizance.
Milib.mp4

Should stick to his cringe gay tiktok memes.

 

[Tom Nook's Gloryhole]

The funniest realistic move would be for Burnham to get on the candidate list only for Reform to win the by-election.

The funniest unrealistic move would be for Starmer to hack Burnham's face off with a potato peeler and staple it to his own and referring to himself as Prime Minister Andy Burnham.

 

[Decapitated Nigger Baby]

I've been to the UK a couple of times and I' gotta say I've zero sympathy for the local population. I've never seen people this mentally ill and dysgenic and I am talking about the natives of that shithole. Overall it's a miserable country and their misery brings joy to my heart and puts a smile on my face. Suffa britons. Suffah

 

[The Green Man]

I've been to the UK a couple of times and I' gotta say I've zero sympathy for the local population. I've never seen people this mentally ill and dysgenic and I am talking about the natives of that shithole. Overall it's a miserable country and their misery brings joy to my heart and puts a smile on my face. Suffa britons. Suffah

Nobody cares, nigger.

 

[teriyakiburns]

He looks like a large primate showing flickers of near-human cognizance.

That's unusually sharp for him.

 

[Otterly]

I don’t like Andy Burnham either. ‘Bit better than Starmer’ is a rather low bar to hit. Hopefully he will lose his seat, but it seems obvious that the blairite demons behind the scenes want to get someone more palatable into the PM role.

I've been to the UK a couple of times and I' gotta say I've zero sympathy for the local population. I've never seen people this mentally ill and dysgenic and I am talking about the natives of that shithole. Overall it's a miserable country and their misery brings joy to my heart and puts a smile on my face. Suffa britons. Suffah

U OK hun?

 

[Spud]

I've been to the UK a couple of times and I' gotta say I've zero sympathy for the local population. I've never seen people this mentally ill and dysgenic and I am talking about the natives of that shithole. Overall it's a miserable country and their misery brings joy to my heart and puts a smile on my face. Suffa britons. Suffah

That's a cute opinion. Which MATI episode did you get it from?

 

[femboy fart huffer]

I still think Farage is a plant.

I always found it incredibly interesting that he has always just kinda been there. I remember making jokes in school about him, here we are what 4-5 elections later and he's still just there. How come every other politician gets cycled out every time but farage just doesn't? Why is there not an option for me to vote for milliband again?

if you have any spare room in your house or garage

Remember when houses were built with pantries? Remember when it was an expectation to have a large amount of stable food in your house at any time instead of blindly relying on supermarkets never closing their doors aside from Christmas and New Year's? Buy whatever you want. Be a hoarder. Buy as much tinned shit and pasta and instant noodles and fucking whatever as you want. Hoarding is not real unless you are wasting it. Having several month's worth of food isn't hoarding, buying food when you already have so much that it's going rotten is. Which is much more common with general groceries than any tinned shit is. Do whatever, have a massive pantry, it worked well for everyone who came before you. Don't forget water purifying stuff and gas for cooking too.

Count Cuckula with a valid point for once: https://x.com/CountDankulaTV/status/2015082811091300658

My favourite bald transgender enthusiast. He's not wrong but have we ever considered that even though London is a shithole it's still better than every indian shithole. We're expecting an indian to be honest and to have any idea what London should be.

 

[Overdrive]

Beans and pasta are one thing, but the real benefit is variety. Most tinned goods are fine until 2029 or even later, I've picked up cans that are fine until after 2030 which is ridiculous.

So in addition to dried pasta and beans there's soup, mackerel, sardines, tuna, canned chicken in white sauce (yes I know, but it takes 2 minutes to heat up in the microwave and tea is sorted), chili con carne, microwave rice (veetee sticky rice straight up works with anything and gets the quality of rice cooker rice in 2 mins), canned vegetables and fruit, spaghetti hoops if they're your thing, and frey bentos pies will straight up outlast every single one of us if stored right. Honestly just go to the tinned food section of Asda or Tesco or Morrisons and grab a few things you like from each section and for £100 or less you've got a safety net.

You're not going to be living like a king, but in extreme circumstances you've got something sorted and absolute worst case scenario if you somehow don't eat that can of chili con carne in 2 years time you're down about 2 quid by chucking it out.

Depending on how autistic you're feeling (for me that's extremely, at all times) you can make a spreadsheet with the dates things will expire on and check it like once a month so 1) you can eat the shit that will go off soon before it does, and 2) replace it with a fresh example. I suppose there's probably some app you can get that will make this easier too these days.

 

[FedPostalService]

@Tom Nook's Gloryhole This 1000%, I did this on the recommendation of Metokour when he was doing the Covid streams in November 2019. I could see something bad happening, so I bought beans and pasta, and froze some bread for toast, and got like 100 rolls of toilet paper in January for about £25.

Ever since then, when I go shopping every few weeks, I buy a few cans of soup, etc. I find it good towards the end of the month too, because if money is low, I can dip into the storage. Since Uni, my friend was a staunch batch cooker, and it really changed how I cook.

Ive been doing that since Covid too. Every time I go shopping I pick up a few random tins of canned soup, meat, fruit, or veg of some sort and put it in what I semi-jokingly call my prepper cupboard. I always have a good stock of flour too (as I make my own bread like a hipster.)

It’s oddly reassuring to open the prepper cupboard. I could probably eat well for two to three months if the supply chains stopped tomorrow.

I've been to the UK a couple of times and I' gotta say I've zero sympathy for the local population. I've never seen people this mentally ill and dysgenic and I am talking about the natives of that shithole. Overall it's a miserable country and their misery brings joy to my heart and puts a smile on my face. Suffa britons. Suffah

Weird, because I’ve been to America a few times and found everyone I met kind, polite, and oddly endearing. I have only been to red states though.

Weirdly I’ve hated every American I’ve met who have travelled to continental Europe as they’re either patronising Democrat voters or twisted terminally online virgins like you and Null.

 

[The Green Man]

An American who visited near me, I got talking to. She was insanely patronizing. Trump hater. Took autistic people on as projects etc. I find some Yanks to be genuinely retarded.

 

[diroama]

I've been to the UK a couple of times and I' gotta say I've zero sympathy for the local population. I've never seen people this mentally ill and dysgenic and I am talking about the natives of that shithole. Overall it's a miserable country and their misery brings joy to my heart and puts a smile on my face. Suffa britons. Suffah

Sorry your skilled worker visa didn't work out jeet

 

[Clem Fandango]

An American who visited near me, I got talking to. She was insanely patronizing. Trump hater. Took autistic people on as projects etc. I find some Yanks to be genuinely retarded.

I mainly talk to Americans in a business setting, but I still find it a bit amusing that they just assume that I hate Trump. I've had colleagues outright apologise for him. I always think it's a bit odd. Like, I think Starmer's a cunt but I'm not going around apologising that he's our PM. I guess the US Pres is a bit more important though tbf.

Edit:

That's reminded me of another time at work. Remember when that bunch of divs dumped a statue of Edward Colston in the docks in Bristol. One of my colleagues (non-yank, just for clarity) started aggressively explaining to me at lunch one day how those people were in the wrong and they had no right to do that and there had been local surveys on whether they should keep the statue that always came back positive etc etc.

And I had to say whoa whoa whoa, I agree. I think those people should be prosecuted for just taking matters into their own hands and dumping a statue into the docks. Maybe the guy had just got so used to arguing with people he was really combative from the outset?

Or maybe even more troubling, do I have some sort of lefty look about me? That's kind of a horrifying thought. It's not like I go around in a beret calling people "comrade".

 

[EddyRooney]

Beans and pasta are one thing, but the real benefit is variety. Most tinned goods are fine until 2029 or even later, I've picked up cans that are fine until after 2030 which is ridiculous.

So in addition to dried pasta and beans there's soup, mackerel, sardines, tuna, canned chicken in white sauce (yes I know, but it takes 2 minutes to heat up in the microwave and tea is sorted), chili con carne, microwave rice (veetee sticky rice straight up works with anything and gets the quality of rice cooker rice in 2 mins), canned vegetables and fruit, spaghetti hoops if they're your thing, and frey bentos pies will straight up outlast every single one of us if stored right. Honestly just go to the tinned food section of Asda or Tesco or Morrisons and grab a few things you like from each section and for £100 or less you've got a safety net.

You're not going to be living like a king, but in extreme circumstances you've got something sorted and absolute worst case scenario if you somehow don't eat that can of chili con carne in 2 years time you're down about 2 quid by chucking it out.

Appreciate this isn't a prepping thread, so I'll try to keep a lid on it.....but when the power goes out ( pick your reason - Russia / Miliband / Grid malfunction, etc ) - how are you going to cook this bounty ?

My fall-backs are a camping stove type deal with a bottled gass supply and my charcoal kettle drum bbq for cooking meat. Any other ideas ?

Also, you should add bottled water to that list. I've got about 200 litres. The water went off for a week not too far from me not long ago.

Are you just looking at a reserve in case things go wrong for a few weeks and then back to normal ?

I'm pessimistic. I'm looking more long term, so possibly at generators and water purification and storage.

 

[BongoMongo]

The Bone Temple was mediocre. Screamingly obvious it was directed by a nigger. And the use of music in it was overbearing.

If you have to rely on music that's not written for, and to complement your film,to engage your audience or elicit a response, then you're a crap director. But it makes sense a tongue clicking diversity hire wouldn't be up to snuff.

Da Costa isn't just a nigger, she's also an American Nigger. The absolute worst of it all. The film felt simple, basic, entry level dumbed down shite but given it was directed by a nigger woman from the USA that makes sense.

 

[Le b0wski]

Police will need a license to work lol

https://news.sky.com/story/police-officers-warned-they-must-hold-work-licence-or-face-the-sack-13498279

 

[Institutes of Justinian]

Dude. I have literally been to the police about having been sexually assaulted by two boat monkeys while walking home from work. This was in 2021 before people really started noticing it.

Having realised seeking any form of justice was absolutely futile, I stoped engaging with the police and told them not to bother.

That is my actual lived experience as a born and raised English woman. I'm not a Russian bot and I've no skin on the politics game aside from having to live in a country where these rape apes run amok.

Similar experience here, but on a night out. Would also have been in 2021. Never went to the police because my friend went looking for me and punched the fuck out of the cunt when he realised where my dress was and what was happening. Dude is a big time lefty-loosy and even he agrees that he was from the hotel two streets away. To this day, he is still the only person on this planet who actually believes that I was attacked by who I said I was.

Don’t regret looking out for him by not going to the police after bc it went well above what would pass for reasonable force but I despise knowing that there was/is a predator walking around in [city redacted] and I didn’t do anything about it. We live and we learn. Too bad no one else does.

 

[Crunkle]

there was a migrant tracker for where they're staying but @Crunkle has been too busy ogling at glow in the dark tits so unfortunately the site is down. https://kiwifarms.st/threads/uk-migrant-crime-tracker-development-thread.226251/page-6#post-23247778 if you're interested in the data however since he did release a backup of the SQL database.

Hey yeah, got busy, only get a chance to check KF every other week if I'm lucky. Have had to get into a new line of work so have had almost no time at all to do anything (aka spend hours shitposting on KF). The site that hosted it fucked me over a little bit so I said fuck it. Uploaded that SQL and all of the raw data so anyone who wants to use it, go right ahead. Also got a request from some kind of university researcher in Bulgaria who requested my data so I sent it all over to him, hope that produces something cool.

Still got the source code if there's a demand for a hastily-written Laravel codebase, might go and comb through and remove some of my more embarrassing shit and post it in that thread for the crime tracker at some point.

Burnham's going to ream Starmer, amazed Starmer's made it this far. Rayner, Khan, Powell (The Deputy Prime Minister) and Miliband are all encouraging him to go for it which shows just how many sharks are circling Starmer but all frightened to harpoon him. Jenrick and Farage are going to fight and torpedo the chances of a Reform government, nothing changes. David from the Greens is probably going to stand and win that by-election so we'll get used to old Snaggletooth Pillion speaking in Parliament every Wednesday.

Also my new realisation: all of this digital, app-only, Just Eat, Deliveroo, Uber Eats shit is just to keep us at home so we can't see how degraded the country is. Digital GP appointments so we can't see the sub-80 IQ bronchitis-infected nigger cattle taking up all of appointments, digital council services so we can't see how much money they waste on shit. Walking binbags all around, Pakis driving 80k Range Rovers from the profits of their scam businesses. How are you all doing, anyways?

 

[BongoMongo]

Police will need a license to work lol

https://news.sky.com/story/police-officers-warned-they-must-hold-work-licence-or-face-the-sack-13498279

I really don't see the issue. If you need to be licensed and accredited to cut toenails then you should need the same to exercise the Law.

The fact many police officers are furious about this is hilarious and telling.