UK British News Megathread - aka CWCissey's news thread

https://news.sky.com/story/row-over-new-greggs-vegan-sausage-rolls-heats-up-11597679 (https://archive.ph/5Ba6o)

A heated row has broken out over a move by Britain's largest bakery chain to launch a vegan sausage roll.

The pastry, which is filled with a meat substitute and encased in 96 pastry layers, is available in 950 Greggs stores across the country.

It was promised after 20,000 people signed a petition calling for the snack to be launched to accommodate plant-based diet eaters.


But the vegan sausage roll's launch has been greeted by a mixed reaction: Some consumers welcomed it, while others voiced their objections.

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spread happiness@p4leandp1nk
https://twitter.com/p4leandp1nk/status/1080767496569974785

#VEGANsausageroll thanks Greggs

7
10:07 AM - Jan 3, 2019
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Cook and food poverty campaigner Jack Monroe declared she was "frantically googling to see what time my nearest opens tomorrow morning because I will be outside".

While TV writer Brydie Lee-Kennedy called herself "very pro the Greggs vegan sausage roll because anything that wrenches veganism back from the 'clean eating' wellness folk is a good thing".

One Twitter user wrote that finding vegan sausage rolls missing from a store in Corby had "ruined my morning".

Another said: "My son is allergic to dairy products which means I can't really go to Greggs when he's with me. Now I can. Thank you vegans."

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pg often@pgofton
https://twitter.com/pgofton/status/1080772793774624768

The hype got me like #Greggs #Veganuary

42
10:28 AM - Jan 3, 2019
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TV presenter Piers Morgan led the charge of those outraged by the new roll.

"Nobody was waiting for a vegan bloody sausage, you PC-ravaged clowns," he wrote on Twitter.

Mr Morgan later complained at receiving "howling abuse from vegans", adding: "I get it, you're all hangry. I would be too if I only ate plants and gruel."

Another Twitter user said: "I really struggle to believe that 20,000 vegans are that desperate to eat in a Greggs."

"You don't paint a mustach (sic) on the Mona Lisa and you don't mess with the perfect sausage roll," one quipped.

Journalist Nooruddean Choudry suggested Greggs introduce a halal steak bake to "crank the fume levels right up to 11".

The bakery chain told concerned customers that "change is good" and that there would "always be a classic sausage roll".

It comes on the same day McDonald's launched its first vegetarian "Happy Meal", designed for children.

The new dish comes with a "veggie wrap", instead of the usual chicken or beef option.

It should be noted that Piers Morgan and Greggs share the same PR firm, so I'm thinking this is some serious faux outrage and South Park KKK gambiting here.

 

[Made In Wales]

Kemi summons her inner Francis Urquhart:

https://www.gbnews.com/politics/kemi-badenoch-tory-mp-meeting-defection-reform

https://archive.ph/wip/FSmQN

The Fists On The Table Committee to choose a new Tory leader by the summer then...

 

[Tom Nook's Gloryhole]

The Fists On The Table Committee to choose a new Tory leader by the summer then...

At this point who exactly would be left? The next best choice after Kemi was Jenrick and unless he defects back you've basically got a sea of "Literally who?"s

It's a shame it's came to this, Kemi was actually a pretty good Tory leader and she's completely eaten shit on every decision she's made over the past week. I absolutely see Tories wanting to defect en masse now that Jenrick has gone and it's blatently obvious the Tory party is looking like a ZERO SEATS situation.

 

[Smyrna]

Any new Tory leadership contest would be a retread of the last one, sans the winner and runner-up. So either Cleverly, Patel, Stride or Tugendhat. Maybe Timothy runs in the space that Jenrick used to occupy, but he can't win.

The weekend convinced me that the party will not die. All of the wet standard bearers were out making the case for liberal conservatism. The Times in particular was full of it (both Syed and Parris among others). This sort of politics does still have a constituency, in parts of the country where the average house price is >£400k and the population is >90% white (i.e. most of the Home Counties, SE England more generally, and parts of the shires). And that is where the Tories will survive, squabbling with the Lib Dems in ~75 seats.

 

[Tom Nook's Gloryhole]

So word on the wire is that FIVE Tories have been in talks with Farage, the most important one being Suella Braveman.

While I normally hate brown Tories, Suella at least was relatively impressive under the last Tory government but honestly she's been so anonymous over the past year that I genuinely thought she'd been voted out of her constituency.

 

[evrae]

At this point who exactly would be left? The next best choice after Kemi was Jenrick and unless he defects back you've basically got a sea of "Literally who?"s

It's a shame it's came to this, Kemi was actually a pretty good Tory leader and she's completely eaten shit on every decision she's made over the past week. I absolutely see Tories wanting to defect en masse now that Jenrick has gone and it's blatently obvious the Tory party is looking like a ZERO SEATS situation.

Which is especially funny when they're now consistently the 2nd place party in polls, overtaking Labour who are now in 3rd or even 4th. But I guess they're gonna jump ship to Reform because that's where the votes are going and just subvert whatever is left there is that isn't already subverted. MRPs are still suggesting it'll either be a Reform majority outright or Reform in coalition with a much smaller Conservative party.
Hell, MRPs are suggesting Labour could slip as far as 6th place in seats (below LibDems, Greens, and yes, even SNP), which would certainly be an embarrassing end.

 

[femboy fart huffer]

Hillsborough

Steven Dawson was responsible for that disaster btw.

He also sang the national anthem in Welsh

I was going to say Jesus fuck he'll get beheaded doing that. But no he sang the Welsh national anthem, not the national anthem in Welsh. I can't really judge his pronunciation but it's probably better than I could do. He still obviously has an Asian accent but that might just be the Welsh doing that.

To no ones shock they do sometimes get the "Paris syndrome" when they come here and realise how much of a shit hole it is.

Or they get the exact opposite because even though this country is a fucking shithole we're still not p****s.
All the Asians love England. Go over there and tell them you're american and they roll their eyes, go over there and say you're English and they'll think it's the coolest shit going. We used to have loads of chinks around here, you could tell they were specifically Chinese because they would always have the same umbrella hats and would always have absolutely massive cameras with every attachment possible.

 

[Clem Fandango]

Guys, I've got a low key conspiracy theory for you. I was doing the shopping tonight and one item on the list was "meaty crisps". I couldn't find them anywhere. Lidl (don't judge) does a meaty crisps multipack with three flavours: cheese and onion, roast chicken, and prawn cocktail. At best, only one of those flavours qualify as "meaty".

So I went to the big Tesco. Still no meaty crisps anywhere. No multipacks with smoky bacon or beef. They weren't even selling them individually in the bit near the meal deals.

Have Walkers quietly retired the smoky bacon flavour altogether? When was the last time you saw a pack? Where do you get them? I feel like I'm losing my god damn mind here.

 

[Duane Dibbley]

Guys, I've got a low key conspiracy theory for you. I was doing the shopping tonight and one item on the list was "meaty crisps". I couldn't find them anywhere. Lidl (don't judge) does a meaty crisps multipack with three flavours: cheese and onion, roast chicken, and prawn cocktail. At best, only one of those flavours qualify as "meaty".

So I went to the big Tesco. Still no meaty crisps anywhere. No multipacks with smoky bacon or beef. They weren't even selling them individually in the bit near the meal deals.

Have Walkers quietly retired the smoky bacon flavour altogether? When was the last time you saw a pack? Where do you get them? I feel like I'm losing my god damn mind here.

Are they vegan friendly? (Serious question). A veggie friend of mine eats prawn cocktail and BBQ crisps because they contain no meat, only flavourings.

RE: Tories. Lowe will return to right the ship.
There's still 2.5 years until the next GE. Plenty of time for labour to throw out some fresh bread and put a lick of paint on the circuses.

 

[UselessRubberKeyboard]

Which is especially funny when they're now consistently the 2nd place party in polls, overtaking Labour who are now in 3rd or even 4th. But I guess they're gonna jump ship to Reform because that's where the votes are going and just subvert whatever is left there is that isn't already subverted. MRPs are still suggesting it'll either be a Reform majority outright or Reform in coalition with a much smaller Conservative party.
Hell, MRPs are suggesting Labour could slip as far as 6th place in seats (below LibDems, Greens, and yes, even SNP), which would certainly be an embarrassing end.

Excuse me for being old and jaded, but at this point the party name barely matters. They’re all just out to stay in power or some position of influence. They’ll go to any party that looks like it’ll give them that.

This is the problem with our entrenched political system. It’s not about politics, morality, laws or belief any more. It’s just about power. I have no idea if real politics is even possible long-term now. Our politicians are from rich and entrenched backgrounds. There are almost none from working class backgrounds, from the areas and people they represent (unless you count the south Asians). We’re ruled over by an elite, it’s not democracy and hasn’t been for a long time.

It took WWII to get real people into the political system last time (and to give the richer classes a shock when they saw how real people actually live). Really hoping it doesn’t need something like that again.

Tl;dr doesn’t matter who’s in power, they’re all the same dickheads.

Will I go to prison for calling them dickheads?

Guys, I've got a low key conspiracy theory for you. I was doing the shopping tonight and one item on the list was "meaty crisps". I couldn't find them anywhere. Lidl (don't judge) does a meaty crisps multipack with three flavours: cheese and onion, roast chicken, and prawn cocktail. At best, only one of those flavours qualify as "meaty".

So I went to the big Tesco. Still no meaty crisps anywhere. No multipacks with smoky bacon or beef. They weren't even selling them individually in the bit near the meal deals.

Have Walkers quietly retired the smoky bacon flavour altogether? When was the last time you saw a pack? Where do you get them? I feel like I'm losing my god damn mind here.

I’m sorry, what? Tesco always used to do a multipack of meaty (real meaty) flavoured crisps. What the actual fuck? How is anyone supposed to have a good crisp sarnie without smoky bacon crisps?

Fuck this, we riot.

 

[Clem Fandango]

I’m sorry, what? Tesco always used to do a multipack of meaty (real meaty) flavoured crisps. What the actual fuck? How is anyone supposed to have a good crisp sarnie without smoky bacon crisps?

I know right? I need everyone to go to their local shops and report back. I thought I lived in a pretty white area, but it's still technically in the Islamic Caliphate of Lahndahn, so I dunno maybe Sadiq Khan had smoky bacon banned or something?

Fuck this, we riot.

Absolutely.

Edit:
Just for completeness, there were beef flavoured hula hoops, but i was not that desperate.

 

[femboy fart huffer]

at this point the party name barely matters

A rose by any other name would still be thorned.

I know right? I need everyone to go to their local shops and report back. I thought I lived in a pretty white area, but it's still technically in the Islamic Caliphate of Lahndahn, so I dunno maybe Sadiq Khan had smoky bacon banned or something?

Never had any problem finding any sort of meaty chips before. Had problems trying to find good ones if that counts.

 

[evrae]

Excuse me for being old and jaded, but at this point the party name barely matters. They’re all just out to stay in power or some position of influence. They’ll go to any party that looks like it’ll give them that.

This is the problem with our entrenched political system. It’s not about politics, morality, laws or belief any more. It’s just about power. I have no idea if real politics is even possible long-term now. Our politicians are from rich and entrenched backgrounds. There are almost none from working class backgrounds, from the areas and people they represent (unless you count the south Asians). We’re ruled over by an elite, it’s not democracy and hasn’t been for a long time.

It took WWII to get real people into the political system last time (and to give the richer classes a shock when they saw how real people actually live). Really hoping it doesn’t need something like that again.

Yeah if there's so much jumping ship it really does paint a picture, and not a good one.
I think what doesn't help is it has all gotten very entrenched through places such as Eton/Oxford/etc. You only get anywhere if you're part of the club and if you're not part of it you'll hit a peak very fast.

Have Walkers quietly retired the smoky bacon flavour altogether? When was the last time you saw a pack? Where do you get them? I feel like I'm losing my god damn mind here.

The hell? I got them not long back. If they got rid of them I'll be pissed, smoky bacon was the only flavour I really picked out.

 

[Chunky Salsa]

It’s just about power.

As the good book says .

 

[Clem Fandango]

meaty chips

U fukin wot?

 

[UselessRubberKeyboard]

I know right? I need everyone to go to their local shops and report back. I thought I lived in a pretty white area, but it's still technically in the Islamic Caliphate of Lahndahn, so I dunno maybe Sadiq Khan had smoky bacon banned or something?

Absolutely.

Edit:
Just for completeness, there were beef flavoured hula hoops, but i was not that desperate.

My local Tesco (Norf FC territory) has the meaty crisps multipack - beef & onion, chicken, smoky bacon. The suspicion grows that this may be a Lahndaaaahn-specific issue.

No-one takes away our crisp sarnies. NO-ONE.

U fukin wot?

Evidently he meant minced beef & onion on chips. The slightly posher version of chips & gravy (after payday and the ability to afford a can of the good stuff). Because no-one from these good isles would call crisps ‘chips’, surely?

 

[Clem Fandango]

My local Tesco (Norf FC territory) has the meaty crisps multipack - beef & onion, chicken, smoky bacon. The suspicion grows that this may be a Lahndaaaahn-specific issue.

No-one takes away our crisp sarnies. NO-ONE.

Ho-lee-shit, I think I've actually uncovered something. I need the rest of the thread to chime in (don't dox your location, obviously) but have they fucking banned smoky bacon crisps in London?!? Why are people not talking about this?

Evidently he meant minced beef & onion on chips. The slightly posher version of chips & gravy (after payday and the ability to afford a can of the good stuff). Because no-one from these good isles would call crisps ‘chips’, surely?

What's really fun as a Brit is to go to Australia. They call crisps "chips" , and they call chips "chips". I don't understand how they can operate under that nomenclature. Maybe it's some kind of subtle inflection that distinguishes the two?

 

[Made In Wales]

The only acceptable crisp was the now much missed Brannigan's Roast Beef & Mustard, IMO.

 

[femboy fart huffer]

U fukin wot?

Want to take a guess what I just had for dinner?

 

[Made In Wales]

Want to take a guess what I just had for dinner?

If it's not Twiglets dipped in Marmite, I will be disappointed.

Edit: Smoky Bacon crisps are freely available in most Spar/Blakemore and Nisa stores.

 

[Clem Fandango]

Want to take a guess what I just had for dinner?

A burger?!??!!?!!

Dun dun dunnnnn