UK British News Megathread - aka CWCissey's news thread

https://news.sky.com/story/row-over-new-greggs-vegan-sausage-rolls-heats-up-11597679 (https://archive.ph/5Ba6o)

A heated row has broken out over a move by Britain's largest bakery chain to launch a vegan sausage roll.

The pastry, which is filled with a meat substitute and encased in 96 pastry layers, is available in 950 Greggs stores across the country.

It was promised after 20,000 people signed a petition calling for the snack to be launched to accommodate plant-based diet eaters.


But the vegan sausage roll's launch has been greeted by a mixed reaction: Some consumers welcomed it, while others voiced their objections.

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spread happiness@p4leandp1nk
https://twitter.com/p4leandp1nk/status/1080767496569974785

#VEGANsausageroll thanks Greggs

7
10:07 AM - Jan 3, 2019
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Cook and food poverty campaigner Jack Monroe declared she was "frantically googling to see what time my nearest opens tomorrow morning because I will be outside".

While TV writer Brydie Lee-Kennedy called herself "very pro the Greggs vegan sausage roll because anything that wrenches veganism back from the 'clean eating' wellness folk is a good thing".

One Twitter user wrote that finding vegan sausage rolls missing from a store in Corby had "ruined my morning".

Another said: "My son is allergic to dairy products which means I can't really go to Greggs when he's with me. Now I can. Thank you vegans."

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pg often@pgofton
https://twitter.com/pgofton/status/1080772793774624768

The hype got me like #Greggs #Veganuary

42
10:28 AM - Jan 3, 2019
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TV presenter Piers Morgan led the charge of those outraged by the new roll.

"Nobody was waiting for a vegan bloody sausage, you PC-ravaged clowns," he wrote on Twitter.

Mr Morgan later complained at receiving "howling abuse from vegans", adding: "I get it, you're all hangry. I would be too if I only ate plants and gruel."

Another Twitter user said: "I really struggle to believe that 20,000 vegans are that desperate to eat in a Greggs."

"You don't paint a mustach (sic) on the Mona Lisa and you don't mess with the perfect sausage roll," one quipped.

Journalist Nooruddean Choudry suggested Greggs introduce a halal steak bake to "crank the fume levels right up to 11".

The bakery chain told concerned customers that "change is good" and that there would "always be a classic sausage roll".

It comes on the same day McDonald's launched its first vegetarian "Happy Meal", designed for children.

The new dish comes with a "veggie wrap", instead of the usual chicken or beef option.

It should be noted that Piers Morgan and Greggs share the same PR firm, so I'm thinking this is some serious faux outrage and South Park KKK gambiting here.

 

[Heinrich Maneuver]

So is this guy in Nottingham on the loose still? Jesus fucking Christ, the Police are just overall inept.

Yes. It's not even on the BBC (for me) yet. The last update was the police confirming this 'was a murder'. Thank you police.

 

[BongoMongo]

Anyone catch this off the DM website?

Funny stuff how when they're white they release a description and a picture but when they're black, literally crickets.

 

[Miriam Margoyles]

My big issue with vaping is that even if the science says that vaping is safer, it'll only be the regulated and more expensive ones that are safer. Everyone I know just goes to their local paki shop and buys liquid or vapes that could be made with Chinese sewage water for all we know.

My big issue with vaping is that it's gay and if you vape you're gay.

 

[Otterly]

you guys aren't going to believe what's happened

This is my shocked face. Honest. Do we need a uk stabbing mega thread?

Please tell me which of these chemicals which make up most vape liquids:
Propylene Glycol (EP), Vegetable Glycerine (EP), Water, Nicotine (EP), Salicylic Acid, Flavourings,

Does more harm than this small selection of the over 7,000 chemicals in cigarette smoke:
Acetone, Acetic acid, Ammonia, Arsenic, Benzene, Butane, Cadmium, Carbon monoxide, Formaldehyde, Hexamine, Lead, Naphthalene, Methanol, Tar, Toluene

Burning stuff and inhaling it isn’t good for you and vaporising stuff and inhaling isn’t either, bar a few notable therapeutic exceptions and even then it’s sporadic use only. Your lungs shouldn’t be exposed to any of that.
Vapes are sold as ‘harm reduction’ and maybe that’s true, maybe if you’re a two pack a day smoker you’ll be doing less harm on vapes. But I don’t like the idea of harm reduction sold as ‘fine’ rather than ‘might be a bit less bad but still not good for you.’
But it’s a bit like banning beer or whiskey and encouraging alcopops, you get rid of something you need to get a taste for, and that children hate and you replace it with something harmful that’s sweet and palatable.
We were out at a restaurant the other day and there was a girl maybe 10 or so fake vaping (I hope) off a sort of mini USB fan thing. I hope it was fake, but it was giving off vapour. Looked awful.
It allows people to develop a habit and ingest so much more than they would have if it was a cigarette that made them cough.
Booze and fags and cigars and pipes should be freely available to adults. I’m done with banning stuff that’s individual choice. But we should have a good grip in how harmful it is. Cheap Chinese vape fluid can have anything in it, and the vast majority of vapes are bootleg cheap stuff sold off the back of a lorry. Propylene glycol is NOT safe. People just need to understand the risks, and then it’s up to them.
We could do with banning politicians, NGOs, and stabby nutcases though

 

[FedPostalService]

Vapes are sold as ‘harm reduction’ and maybe that’s true, maybe if you’re a two pack a day smoker you’ll be doing less harm on vapes.

It makes me think of headgear in boxing. It looks safer but makes your head a bigger target, makes you less likely to guard properly as you feel safer with the padding, protects against cuts and bruises but does fuck all against brain injury, so using it in actual competitive fights was more dangerous than having no head gear.

 

[Otterly]

It makes me think of headgear in boxing. It looks safer but makes your head a bigger target, makes you less likely to guard properly as you feel safer with the padding, protects against cuts and bruises but does fuck all against brain injury, so using it in actual competitive fights was more dangerous than having no head gear.

Good example. Have I heard the same about boxing gloves or is that a myth?
Vapes aren’t good for you. Smoking really isn’t good for you. I don’t really care if people do either, goodness knows there’s little enough pleasure in life. I don’t drink either but fuck it, if people want to get battered at the weekend I can see why, life’s miserable.
Tried to find some fizzy pop at the weekend for a kids party and took me forever to find some with zero artificial sweeteners in. Lower sugar = good apparently, but it all tastes foul, and you’d be better off just limiting the pop to parties and events and then enjoying the full sugar stuff. We are a miserable bunch.

 

[PandaChai]

My big issue with vaping is that it's gay and if you vape you're gay.

Cosigned.
One thing I've noticed is that they seem to fuck your front teeth up worse than thumb-sucking ever could, too. I snapped a photo a friend who vapes at a bad angle and it looked like he'd lost his teeth, full meth look.

 

[teriyakiburns]

Good example. Have I heard the same about boxing gloves or is that a myth?

Myth. Bone on bone is more painful and more dangerous. You can break your hand and their face with a good left hook.

 

[Otterly]

Myth. Bone on bone is more painful and more dangerous. You can break your hand and their face with a good left hook.

Only once though.

 

[Mound Dweller]

Cosigned.
One thing I've noticed is that they seem to fuck your front teeth up worse than thumb-sucking ever could, too. I snapped a photo a friend who vapes at a bad angle and it looked like he'd lost his teeth, full meth look.

That's because the primary cause of meth-mouth is the constant exposure to water vapour, yeah the mething around doesn't help much but what's actively rotting the enamel away is what they're puffing on, exact same method of action with tobacco vapour hence all the 20 somethings with no teeth I reckon.

 

[Overly Serious]

It makes me think of headgear in boxing. It looks safer but makes your head a bigger target, makes you less likely to guard properly as you feel safer with the padding, protects against cuts and bruises but does fuck all against brain injury, so using it in actual competitive fights was more dangerous than having no head gear.

You can also add American football vs. Rugby. The former actually leads to worse injuries because with the crappy semi-effective pads and helmets, people just collide into each other with greater force.

Have I heard the same about boxing gloves or is that a myth?

Gloves protect your hands. You don't want a split knuckle 'cause you slammed your fist into someone's forehead with all your might. And they will somewhat protect against cuts on your opponent which is what you want in a boxing match. But they don't really do anything to reduce the force of a blow. They do make it safer to punch people though so I guess maybe in principle? But unlike the headgear, you want it. It provides a meaningful protection - for the wearer.

Edited to say,not pooping when withdrawing from tobacco was by far my worst thing. Needing to poop and not being able to is the absolute worst.

When the bottom falls out of your world, take milk of magnesia and watch the world fall out of your bottom.

 

[Symbol of the Chud]

Myth. Bone on bone is more painful and more dangerous. You can break your hand and their face with a good left hook.

This is the myth, while bone on bone is more painful, it's not more dangerous. Boxing gloves have increased brain trauma in the sport because you can punch harder without, you know, worrying about breaking your fucking hand.
Bare Knuckle Boxing would only be truly the most dangerous in a theoretical downie olympics where there's no self-preservation instinct.

Basically
Bare Knuckle Boxing = More cuts and eye injuries
Boxing Gloves = Brain Trauma
One looks like it's more damaging, but the other has lead to more literal drooling retards and deaths.

 

[Russian Bot #5361]

Good example. Have I heard the same about boxing gloves or is that a myth?

It's a mixed bag, but the main purpose of the gloves is to protect your hands more so than to protect your opponent, though boxing gloves are great at preventing superficial wounds like cuts and gashes which would occur in a bareknuckle fight.

The size of the gloves would impact force, at the professional level they usually use 8oz gloves, but most people will spar with 14oz or 16oz and there is a noticeable difference when getting hit by them, so a bareknuckle punch would hurt more. However, because your hands are protected by the gloves and wraps, it allows you to put more toque and power in a punch than in bareknuckle, as your hands would be destroyed by the force in an average boxing punch with no gloves.

The real damage done is the brain sloshing around the skull after a punch, so more force usually means more long-term damage, so boxing gloves most likely do cause more harm in the long-term, but protect from short-term harm like cuts. Same logic applies to the headgear, prevents superficial damage at the cost of increasing the surface area of the head meaning it's easier to hit.

 

[Miriam Margoyles]

I didn't want to get drawn into a whole thing with regard to vapes, hence why my original response was quite flippant, but since @Otterly has brought it up, I do think that it's quite insidious how they were clearly designed to appeal to children.

Sweet, fruity flavourings, fun, bright colours, funny names like Elfbar and Lost Mary or whatever. It doesn't help that they're kept at the front of all the shops, where the impulse buy, pocket money items like chocolate bars used to be. That's before we even factor in the documented cases of them being deliberately advertised on the Cartoon Network website, and other places online that children might frequent.

I remember reading somewhere that pre-pandemic, tobacco smoking was at an all time low - young people were too aware of the health risks and weren't engaging with it like they used to.

I can just picture some evil marketing genius at the tobacco company looking out the window of his office, taking a long, slow puff on his cigar, narrowing his eyes and going, "What if we made 'em taste like sweets?"

 

[Symbol of the Chud]

I didn't want to get drawn into a whole thing with regard to vapes, hence why my original response was quite flippant, but since @Otterly has brought it up, I do think that it's quite insidious how they were clearly designed to appeal to children.

Sweet, fruity flavourings, fun, bright colours, funny names like Elfbar and Lost Mary or whatever. It doesn't help that they're kept at the front of all the shops, where the impulse buy, pocket money items like chocolate bars used to be. That's before we even factor in the documented cases of them being deliberately advertised on the Cartoon Network website, and other places online that children might frequent.

I remember reading somewhere that pre-pandemic, tobacco smoking was at an all time low - young people were too aware of the health risks and weren't engaging with it like they used to.

I can just picture some evil marketing genius at the tobacco company looking out the window of his office, taking a long, slow puff on his cigar, narrowing his eyes and going, "What if we made 'em taste like sweets?"

Of course tobacco sales were in the hole, the government (in a rare case of the nanny state debatably doing something decent) stripped away every single 'boomer cool' element that smoking tobacco once had, and replaced every ounce of packaging with shit like "IF YOU USE THIS YOU WILL GET CANCER, DIE, AND NOBODY WILL CARE" and gore images.
But the "I want people to die" industry hit back by taking inspiration from Zoomer Cool with their next invention, taking inspiration from shit that really gets the zoom zoom brain going like bright colors and fidget spinners. Think the sorta shit Youtubers make, the flavored piss that is Prime, Mr Beast's Shit Chocolate. A big thing you'll notice is that shit like Prime has abut ten thousand different flavors, same as vapes, for the sake of there being more color.

Vapes are just ciggies for gay autists.

 

[BongoMongo]

That's because the primary cause of meth-mouth is the constant exposure to water vapour, yeah the mething around doesn't help much but what's actively rotting the enamel away is what they're puffing on, exact same method of action with tobacco vapour hence all the 20 somethings with no teeth I reckon.

Well, that and a complete lack of access to affordable dental care. Shabahna and Nbugu get a taxi to and from their appointment with an interpreter and we put for it, as well as paying into the NHS dental system, and we're then expected to spend hundreds on dental care. Often with them touting their "insurance" which in reality is a monthly fee, a couple free check ups and a tiny percentage off any treatment identified at said check up (spoiler: they will find something they say they need to do).

Had this with a dentist and got a second opinion when on holiday in Poland. Turns out I don't need the hundreds of pounds of periodontist appointments they said I would, 8 years later things are still fine.

 

[the printer is outo fink]

Tried to find some fizzy pop at the weekend for a kids party and took me forever to find some with zero artificial sweeteners in. Lower sugar = good apparently, but it all tastes foul, and you’d be better off just limiting the pop to parties and events and then enjoying the full sugar stuff. We are a miserable bunch.

This stuff is supposed to be pretty good and it's not terribly priced for fizzy drinks that are only sweetened by sugar.

https://icedrinks.co.uk/

 

[Clem Fandango]

Sometimes I'll be driving behind someone, they let out a massive guff of vape cloud, and then that shit gets sucked into the air intake on my car, making the whole place stink. It feels like a violation, and yes vaping is gay.

(my autocorrect tried to change that to "gaping", which also felt appropriate).

 

[Miriam Margoyles]

Sometimes I'll be driving behind someone, they let out a massive guff of vape cloud, and then that shit gets sucked into the air intake on my car, making the whole place stink. It feels like a violation, and yes vaping is gay.

Lol, your car got smoke-raped.
You're driving around in a fag car.

 

[Otterly]

You can also add American football vs. Rugby. The former actually leads to worse injuries because with the crappy semi-effective pads and helmets, people just collide into each other with greater force.

Real men tape their ears to their heads to avoid them getting ripped off.

my autocorrect tried to change that to "gaping", which also felt appropriate).

I’m afraid this gave me flashbacks to the Kelly lenza thread and I feel a bit queasy now.
Is anything nice happening today? I need some NICE news. Find me some adorable baby ducks being ushered across a road or something,
Right this will do and also my thread tax instead of a post about British teeth

https://www.nature.com/articles/s41467-025-64982-y

I actually quite like a snaggly smile, on an otherwise attractive chap, there’s a few rather attractive people with wonky teeth (healthy mind, not the shame macgowan end of it..) perhaps that’s British evolution in action! We are evolving around the problem,