UK British News Megathread - aka CWCissey's news thread

https://news.sky.com/story/row-over-new-greggs-vegan-sausage-rolls-heats-up-11597679 (https://archive.ph/5Ba6o)

A heated row has broken out over a move by Britain's largest bakery chain to launch a vegan sausage roll.

The pastry, which is filled with a meat substitute and encased in 96 pastry layers, is available in 950 Greggs stores across the country.

It was promised after 20,000 people signed a petition calling for the snack to be launched to accommodate plant-based diet eaters.


But the vegan sausage roll's launch has been greeted by a mixed reaction: Some consumers welcomed it, while others voiced their objections.

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spread happiness@p4leandp1nk
https://twitter.com/p4leandp1nk/status/1080767496569974785

#VEGANsausageroll thanks Greggs

7
10:07 AM - Jan 3, 2019
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Cook and food poverty campaigner Jack Monroe declared she was "frantically googling to see what time my nearest opens tomorrow morning because I will be outside".

While TV writer Brydie Lee-Kennedy called herself "very pro the Greggs vegan sausage roll because anything that wrenches veganism back from the 'clean eating' wellness folk is a good thing".

One Twitter user wrote that finding vegan sausage rolls missing from a store in Corby had "ruined my morning".

Another said: "My son is allergic to dairy products which means I can't really go to Greggs when he's with me. Now I can. Thank you vegans."

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pg often@pgofton
https://twitter.com/pgofton/status/1080772793774624768

The hype got me like #Greggs #Veganuary

42
10:28 AM - Jan 3, 2019
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TV presenter Piers Morgan led the charge of those outraged by the new roll.

"Nobody was waiting for a vegan bloody sausage, you PC-ravaged clowns," he wrote on Twitter.

Mr Morgan later complained at receiving "howling abuse from vegans", adding: "I get it, you're all hangry. I would be too if I only ate plants and gruel."

Another Twitter user said: "I really struggle to believe that 20,000 vegans are that desperate to eat in a Greggs."

"You don't paint a mustach (sic) on the Mona Lisa and you don't mess with the perfect sausage roll," one quipped.

Journalist Nooruddean Choudry suggested Greggs introduce a halal steak bake to "crank the fume levels right up to 11".

The bakery chain told concerned customers that "change is good" and that there would "always be a classic sausage roll".

It comes on the same day McDonald's launched its first vegetarian "Happy Meal", designed for children.

The new dish comes with a "veggie wrap", instead of the usual chicken or beef option.

It should be noted that Piers Morgan and Greggs share the same PR firm, so I'm thinking this is some serious faux outrage and South Park KKK gambiting here.

 

[UselessRubberKeyboard]

Also noticed this at the very bottom

Wisam Salah, 18, who lives near the cordon, said "everyone is really panicked" after the incident.

Yeah, they (meaning the immigrant population) are really panicked now because they don’t want 500 English blokes with English flags turning up to protest. He’s not scared of being stabbed by an Afghan nutter, but of being told to fuck off back home by a bunch of Brits. Racism is eeeeeeevil, it destroys lives, keeps neighbourhoods in fear etc etc. They know they’re safe from stabby non-Brits. They have the right skin colour for that.

None of these people are racist against white people, I suppose.

At this point some other brown male decided to move to the seat next to him and said "don't worry bro, it's just white people"

Well would you look at that.

Apparently it’s fine when not white people do racism, though.

Also, the cheeky little cunts are welcome to fuck off to another country if they don’t like being around white people. Heaven forfend anyone be expected to have manners in public.

Try rapping loudly about mega violence in a packed area in Saudi Arabia, pal. They may be no friends of women, but they sure as shit don’t tolerate people causing trouble in public. Better still, try it in an African country. See how fast he gets his phone and all his stuff nicked for being an oblivious spoilt westerner. Everyone’s hard until they really find themselves in a tough neighbourhood.

Bit late but on the subject of charities. I always go look at their accounts. It’s amazing looking at where the money actually goes at the big charities. Some of the little ones are really great however and they do a lot of good on a shoe string.

Spoiler: Charity Story Time

I needed an operation and because I fell in a grey area the NHS were dicking about and a tiny charity pulled some strings and got it done a bit quicker. Then a second tiny charity picked up the pieces when the NHS fucked it up.

Also just thought; Greggs’ll be starting the Festive bake soon along with that hideous vegan festive bake.

Glad to hear you got your operation sorted. Small local charities are often fantastic for that, and go completely unnoticed and unappreciated outside of the areas they run in.

There’s one near me that’s dedicated solely to helping locals with severe epilepsy. They do all kinds of stuff, from befriending to shopping, taking young people out to events, going to the hospital with patients and advocating for them, caring for them in the home, arranging voluntary work placements for those who are too badly affected to rely on getting a paid job. They’re absolute superstars and make a huge impact on the lives of the local community. It’s the kind of help that would previously have been split between social services, extended families, neighbours and special hospitals. With all the cutbacks since the 70s, people are really falling through the cracks and not getting practical help in their lives where they need it. Local charities who step up are worth their weight in gold to those who need their help.

It’s just galling to see the country spend money on frivolous crap like illegal immigrants, knowing they’re relying on the sheer big-heartedness of Brits to cover the gaps in funding for everything else. Successive governments have spoken about charities in glowing terms, but they’re hollow words when charities are having to do the work (for free) that a functioning government should.

 

[Gregis]

It would be so cathartic to just chin one one of these days but then I'd be the bad guy.

Unless by chin you meant "dechin, as a part of some form of gruesome ritual execution", the only way this would make you the bad guy would be not going far enough to solve the problem. Once that is the mindset that prevails in society, the healing can begin.

 

[Nopenopenope]

So according to the government, their definition of a "working person" who won't be affected by tax rises etc is someone who earns under 45k. So I guess by becoming an engineer I may as well just hang up my tools and work boots because I don't actually have any work to do apparently. I earn ever so slightly over that amount, but now any sort of raise promotion or bonus isn't going to feel like one.

They're in a world of their own. Productivity is down again, they're saying anything they can to avoid saying the country is full of unproductive people on the dole or migrants, saying things like lack of investment, lack of development and automation causing poor output etc. Problem with that is energy prices make us more expensive already compared to practically anywhere else, wages are also high and rising, and people like me can't get money to improve or upgrade equipment because there is no money for it.

The writing is already on the wall where I am, orders have fallen off a cliff, people are leaving and not being replaced, the company is investing in new equipment we have asked for but it's going to eastern Europe and south America where the energy is cheap and so is the labour. A job we do here with relatively skilled experienced people can be done by someone lower skilled because their new machinery isn't completely fucked held together by duct tape.

The government are either so incompetent they cannot see how the highest energy prices and increasing staff costs affects tax take and productivity, or they actually want to end any sort of industrial activity in this country so they can say we are the greenest (since we will just be powering supermarkets and homes).

Fuck this gay country.

 

[Morethanabitfoolish]

They're not as open about it as I would like, but they're at least conducting an inquiry into the scale of the problem around that particular demographic, which the tories didn't do and only cared about once they could use it to score against labour so they're not the same.

They were forced kicking and screaming into that and a number of the victims have quit recently specifically stating that the inquiry is an active cover up. Giving Labour any sort of a win over that at this point seems odd.

Also your basis for thinking they are the same is because I say they're lying, which conveniently can't be proven. I don't think they're doing any of what they're doing around immigration or the rape gangs out of some moral high ground - they're doing it because they want to stay in power and that's what they need to do to stay in power. But they are doing it, and the tories didn't. The tories just siphoned off massive amounts of cash while people died. People didn't vote in Labour for fun or because Keir Starmer was the next Winston Churchill - it was because the tories were shit and fucked the country. I have zero patience for anyone pretending that's not why they're in power and that they're even capable of being as bad in a year as what the tories did over 14 years.

So you actually think Labour are trying to improve things right now as opposed to mere lip service? As you say I cannot prove their lying which is also convenient for people saying they're honest but I can point to their track record.

Labour unquestionably got in due to a decade and a half of the Tories being dreadful. However Labour expressly stated during that time in many cases that they would have been the same (I won't say worse because the opposing party always ramps up their rhetoric when out of office).

Covid - Labour said the lockdowns should have been more severe, only backtracking on that after it became clear to be a death knell to cling to
Immigration - open borders or everyone's racist. Yes this should also be true during lockdown
Brexit - give the EU everything they want or you're racist. Bear in mind many Labour strongholds voted for this
Trans stuff - we absolutely would not have got the Cass review under Labour. While that's a small thing in the grand scheme it is part of the cultural stranglehold political parties try to wrap around the public's throat. Getting that loosened is good.
BLM and the general lunacy every time someone with non-white skin gets into trouble with police that is increasingly making an already two-tier justice system worse - do I need to dig up the footage of Labour snivelling and fawning around that time?

As for siphoning from the public the scandals from them for that have been countless.
You seem to have the idea I am defending the Tories. I'm not. They too have wrecked their reputation to the point where they should not exist as a party anymore. But pretending Labour this time round are going to be better than Blair and his fellows whose wretched deeds are still a major issue more than a decade and a half on is not something that tracks with their behaviour so far.

To cheapen this metaphor - Labour every time they are in slam a knife into the chest of the general public. The Tories when they get in twist it around so it's slightly more comfortable while sliding it in slightly further.

 

[Clem Fandango]

As a bonus track, whilst waiting at the bus terminal there was a group of 5 young middle-eastern girls sat next to me absolutely screaming and cackling at the top of their lungs about group chat drama or some shit. Just absolutely no volume awareness or consideration for anyone else just sitting or conversing quietly.

Every time I get on a bus I swear to myself that this is the last time I'm doing this. I absolutely cannot stand these people, I know exactly the type you're talking about. The bus can be completely quiet and calm, and then they get on. It literally takes just two of them to absolutely ruin it. Maybe a metaphor for the whole country?

 

[Otterly]

Look at the neutral wording.
A dog walker has died in a stabbing
He was just walking, and he walked right into a stabbing, silly thing, like one might walk Into a puddle. It’s just there, the stabbing. Nobody specific was doing it. We have stabbing lying around like leaves you know.
Let us re write;
Hero dog walker killed as he tries to stop illegal Afghan immigrant from stabbing 14 year old child and his father
There, that’s better. ALWAYS point this sort of language out to people when this stuff happens. I’ve done this countless times and always, they come back after a while and say ‘look at this headline, that’s just what you were on about wasn’t it? It’s all over, I see it all the time, I was pointing it out to our Brian…’
Another man who has care for his community and brave enough to walk into danger to save a child has been slaughtered by a murderous illegal imported by our government.
NOW - if any journalist had any balls at all they would be asking who he was and whether he was one if the ones the government brought here secretly. Possibly not if he arrived in a lorry, but the question should be asked loudly to link the two things in rhe mind if the public.
If you gave me the levers the Behavioural insights boys have, I could have the British public in drill formation with torches within six weeks.

 

[Duane Dibbley]

The Home Office confirmed the arrested man entered the UK in a lorry in November 2020, was granted asylum and leave to remain in 2022, and does not live in Home Office accommodation.

November 2020. Hmm. What was happening in November 2020 that stopped people from seeing their friends and families?
Oh, that's right, a lockdown due a super bad global pandemic where moving around would kill granny and flying abroad would genocide nations.

Yet he was allowed to wonder in, untracked, untraced and for 2 years did...?...then was granted asylum.

Rules for thee not for muzzie

 

[Otterly]

People didn't vote in Labour for fun or because Keir Starmer was the next Winston Churchill - it was because the tories were shit and fucked the country.

I think this happens every election, people don’t so much as vote one lot in as they want to vote the other lot out.
The tories fucked up, they allowed millions in, they messed up Covid. I do not vote not-labour because I like and agree with any if the parties involved, I vote whoever will keep labour out because labour do terrible things when they’re in. I would vote Monster Raving Loony over labour. I’d vote for satan himself over labour (unfortunately he’s currently inhabiting a Mr. T Blair so that option isn’t open…)
But no, the tories didn’t do a good job. They’re shit. They are ALL SHIT. There are no parties that I feel reflect my views at all.
Tories just useless.
Labour crash everything into a wall at full speed every time
Lib Dem’s are useless
Greens are all pedos
I’m not voting for the islamists.
Who else is there? Well there’s reform. I’m very wary of them too - untested, untried, what will they actually DO?
Where is my party who work for the people of this country? The one who will genuinely put Britain first? Clean up pollution and preserve biodiversity (not that kind) rather than go to davos for net zero orders? Boost the economy by making us a hub for high skill high tech manufacturing and R/D? We can’t compete with slaves on cheap bulk but we sure can on precision manufacture, knowledge based things. We have incredible hubs for research - Herriot watt, the oxbridge clusters, clusters in wales even. All our good universities are woefully underused and underpowered - we need translational hubs to take this stuff to market,
We should be pouring resources into hubs that take that blue skies and engineering muscle and turn it into Actual Things. We should be getting pharma manufacturing here, we should be sorting out power generation. Build nuclear plants and in the meantime go drill west of Shetland and dig up the bloody coal. We need power. Shit loads of it. We can do it with minimal environmental impact if we are smart.
All the illegals have to go. Every single one. No more nhs tourism. You’re born here as a citizen you can access it. Everyone else gets insurance. Away with the draconian stuff.

 

[SirCliveSinclairdabbing]

I didn’t realise it but I’m at the point of hatred now where black people nudge their friends when they see me in a shop and walk briskly away.

If I’m carrying unbridled hatred so be it.
We need to start by getting rid of the machete 7%. The only reparations should be a boat back to africa.

 

[teriyakiburns]

See how easy it is? Just put him on a plane back to where he came from.

---

Migrant sex offender deported from UK after mistaken release

A migrant sex offender who was mistakenly released from prison has been deported from the UK with no right to return.

Hadush Kebatu was jailed after sexually assaulting a 14-year-old girl and a woman in Epping, Essex, while living in an asylum hotel, but was mistakenly set free by prison staff on Friday. He was brought back into custody following a two-day manhunt.

Kebatu was put on a flight to Ethiopia on Tuesday night and landed the following morning, the Home Office said.

Home Secretary Shabana Mahmood said: "Last week's blunder should never have happened - and I share the public's anger that it did."

"I have pulled every lever to deport Mr Kebatu and remove him off British soil. I am pleased to confirm this vile child sex offender has been deported. Our streets are safer because of it," she added.

Kebatu arrived in Ethiopia's capital Addis Ababa early on Wednesday and was briefly held by officers at the airport, Ethiopian police told the BBC.

He was then released because there was "no legal basis for his continued detention", Ethiopian Federal Police spokesman Jaylan Abde said.

On Friday he was meant be taken from HMP Chelmsford to an immigration detention centre to be deported under an early removals scheme (ERS) for foreign national offenders.

Instead, he was released in what Justice Secretary David Lammy previously described as apparent "human error".

By the time Essex Police were made aware of the situation shortly before 13:00, he had approached members of the public in the city centre for assistance and boarded a train to London.

He was arrested in north London on Sunday morning after a member of the public contacted the police to say they might have spotted him near Finsbury Park station.

Home Office Minister Alex Norris told BBC Breakfast the situation had "ended in the way it had to end".

"We accept this was a blunder - we're really angry about it as I know the public are."

He said "immediate controls" had been put in place in prisons to avoid a repeat of the incident - including more "stringent" checks when offenders leave prisons for deportation - and that an independent inquiry would identify lessons learned.

The independent investigation will seek to establish how Kebatu was set free and whether staff had sufficient experience, training and technology.

The inquiry chair, former Metropolitan Police deputy commissioner Dame Lynne Owens, will also speak to Kebatu's victims and make recommendations to prevent further mistaken releases, which have risen in recent years.

An urgent review has been ordered into the checks that take place when someone is released from prison. A prison officer has been suspended and no removals from HMP Chelmsford under the ERS will take place this week.

Epping Forest's Conservative MP, Neil Hudson, told BBC Radio 4's Today programme that the community would be "very relieved" by Kebatu's removal.

"No one wants to see our hometown the lead story on the news," he said, adding that the local authority's legal challenge to block migrants from lodging at The Bell Hotel - where Kebatu had been staying - was ongoing.

"The events over the weekend... have really brought things to the surface again," he said. "This is incredibly frustrating and the government must get a grip."

Kebatu arrived in the UK after crossing the Channel on a small boat on 29 June, having travelled through Sudan, Libya, Italy and France.

His arrest in July sparked a wave of protests outside The Bell Hotel in Epping, which was being used to accommodate asylum seekers including Kebatu.

Chelmsford Magistrates' Court heard Kebatu had tried to kiss a teenage girl in the town centre, making sexually explicit comments to her.

The following day, he encountered the same girl and tried to kiss her before sexually assaulting her and another woman.

He denied the charges against him but was found guilty of five offences and sentenced to 12 months in custody, including the time he had already spent in jail awaiting his trial.

A deportation order must be made when a foreign national is sentenced to 12 months or more in custody, under the UK Borders Act 2007.

During Kebatu's trial, the court heard it was his "firm wish" to be deported.

 

[A-Logato]

A migrant sex offender who was mistakenly released from prison has been deported from the UK with no right to return.

My sides will split if he comes back on another boat in a couple of months from now.

 

[Swole McPole]

Think before you post! How the UK fell to a sinister new form of censorship.

 

[Feathers McGraw]

See how easy it is? Just put him on a plane back to where he came from.

---

Migrant sex offender deported from UK after mistaken release

Apparently it's not that easy after all... the article's new title is peak clown world.

Migrant sex offender given £500 after threat to disrupt deportation

https://archive.is/EQ0iy

Turns out the 3rd world can come over here, receive free accommodation and living expenses, rape our children, and get a free flight home with a £500 reward for their good deeds.

Edit: to give some further context - the median salary in Ethiopia works out to £470 p/a. So we just gave him a year's wages for trying to rape our kids.

 

[Heinrich Maneuver]

500 quid for touching a little girl??? fucking HELL

Gov announces ''biggest ever crackdown on illegal working''

New figures show more than 8,000 illegal migrants have been arrested after 11,000 raids were carried out by Immigration Enforcement from October 2024 to September 2025.
Marking the largest enforcement crackdown on illegal working since records began, the data reveals a significant increase year on year of 63% and 51% for arrests and visits, respectively. Over 1,050 foreign nationals encountered on these operations have been removed from the country.

No locations given, but I've seen a lot of police cars vans etc at night in Bham and a couple people ik have said they've been immigration raids? These are total rookie numbers, and it doesn't count when only 1000 get sent back wtf. Still its something.

Reform calling the Motability scheme an 'absolute scandal', set to announce their plans.

 

[BongoMongo]

So they can send someone back to Ethiopia. Surely they can send all the niggers from the same country back there, too?

They didn't have a choice with this one, Epping would have lost its collective shit if they'd not done so.

 

[Heinrich Maneuver]

Epping would have lost its collective shit if they'd not done so.

Might have to add Hillingdon to the list of areas that might lose their collective shit. Vigil last night held for the dog walker, only one video so far and peaceful. AI generated posters suggest a 'protest' will be happening at Downing Street either today or tomorrow noon. I pray the 45 year old man and the poor teenage boy recover from their wounds.

 

[BongoMongo]

These absolute spastics who allow illegal vermin into their homes are absolutely the worst. They're inviting dangerous criminals into their home and they go ahead and commit violence.

That poor dog walker tried to help and ended up dead. They let a fucking ticking bomb into their home and an innocent man who tried to help was killed in cold blood.

 

[femboy fart huffer]

their definition of a "working person" who won't be affected by tax rises etc is someone who earns under 45k

The government said anyone earning over 45k isn't a working person? Well at least they admit government doesn't work I guess?

Every time I get on a bus I swear to myself that this is the last time I'm doing this. I absolutely cannot stand these people, I know exactly the type you're talking about. The bus can be completely quiet and calm, and then they get on. It literally takes just two of them to absolutely ruin it. Maybe a metaphor for the whole country?

There's one bus route in our city that goes through all the old people villages and it's just all pensioners that cause the bus to be late because they genuinely take over a minute to walk from the seat to the door sometimes. It then heads into the city centre and passes through a 'housing' area shall we call it. I don't know if we have a word for 'ghetto' in England, other than 'london'. Every time you notice the mood shift instantly. As soon as they get on, typical oversized puffer jacket and hood up even in the middle of summer, you notice all the old women stop talking so much, they go from constant talk about susan who's in a wheelchair but her husbands going to push her down to the hairdressers this afternoon, to still talking but with bigger gaps, mostly the same things aside from it takes them 10 minutes to say what they would normally in 3. It's oh yea susan's going for a haircut ......... she's still in a wheelchair you know ............... husbands going to take her. And their eyes go from looking at the person they're talking to to sort of sideeyeing the brown but only to the other person. Essentially the nonverbal way of saying 'eww dirty niggers'. It is the entire mood, you feel the very second they get on that the air changes, not even in the typical indian way either. It doesn't even take two of them, it just takes one to sour the entire atmosphere. Like these old women aren't even the scared kind where the most confrontation they've ever had in their life is when someone told them no actually it's pronounced scone. These are old women that will look at some fucking shitbull that one of the skinheads brings on the fucking bus and go awww she's so sweet and all that. They have no trouble interacting with people that I wouldn't call scary but you certainly wouldn't sit across from them, not the type of person you would want eye contact with. But these old women know that they don't give a shit. Slaphead might steal your tools for heroin money but he's not going to touch an old woman because despite being a criminal he still has standards, just like how the Japanese rapists obey the women only train cars. But these old women know that the browns aren't on the same level, they have no respect, you're just another target to them, even moreso because you are old and frail. The things that stops the slaphead from mugging you is the things that attracts the brown to mug you. Honestly the old women seem more at ease when there is a slaphead onboard. I can't say I blame them either. When I was a kid you'd look at someone like that getting on the bus and think oh fucking hell ok here we go, you would react to them then how you react to browns now. Immigrants so fucking bad that our criminals and thugs make us feel safer than the police do.

Even if you did say something to these people it wouldn't matter anyway. The ratios of bus drivers would make the midlands blush. They have genuinely gone all the way, they have become so diverse that they are no longer diverse. I cannot remember the last time I had an Englishman drive our bus.

I have so fucking many stories about the busses, half the time it's not even rage inducing it's just fucking baffling. In the same way that a child stealing all your spices to make 'cocaine' isn't infuriating, it's just fucking dumb. I can't even be mad because they are too retarded to do anything other than laugh at them. But they're all so fucking retarded I refuse to believe that they could have happened to anyone else in the country and I don't want to dox myself through extremely specific nogantics.

A migrant sex offender who was mistakenly released from prison has been deported from the UK with no right to return.

Yea but none of them have any fucking right to come here. Didn't stop him the first time did it? Until we're sending them back in big piles of ash I do not trust anything this country does. Why did he ask to be deported? Because he knows it is quicker and easier to get deported and work his way back to England over the channel and back into society instead of waiting until the prisons let him back into society.

Migrant sex offender given £500 after threat to disrupt deportation

The fuck is he going to use £500 for? They take that in ethiopia do they? If we absolutely must deport him the only thing we should be giving him is a syringe of spermicide to his balls or whatever chemical castration does.

Also that kid that did the somali justeats halloween costume was from fucking Shankill. God fucking bless. I have nothing to say other than I have a feeling I know why it is entirely a media thing instead of any police involvement.

 

[Overly Serious]

Apparently it's not that easy after all... the article's new title is peak clown world.

Migrant sex offender given £500 after threat to disrupt deportation

https://archive.is/EQ0iy

Turns out the 3rd world can come over here, receive free accommodation and living expenses, rape our children, and get a free flight home with a £500 reward for their good deeds.

Edit: to give some further context - the median salary in Ethiopia works out to £470 p/a. So we just gave him a year's wages for trying to rape our kids.

You wouldn't think there's anything more that can be added to that cascade of failure but I've got one: If the police just let him go because there was no reason to detain him, what the Hell was he a refugee from?

The fuck is he going to use £500 for? They take that in ethiopia do they?

Unironically, yes. Someone would be very happy to get five-hundred English bank notes in Ethopia. They'd either take it along to a money changer themselves or buy stuff directly with it. It's not Britain where if you went into Tescos and tried to hand them fifty-grand in Euros for a packet of crisps they'd say "we don't take that." A vendor in the average African town will treat it as barter and give you something in exchange for it same as they would a gold ring or a laptop or a 10L can of petrol. Things are a LOT less rigid outside of Europe.

 

[oh no its pipkun]

unemployment is only at 5%

Governments can keep the unemployment rate artifically low through immigration.