UK British News Megathread - aka CWCissey's news thread

https://news.sky.com/story/row-over-new-greggs-vegan-sausage-rolls-heats-up-11597679 (https://archive.ph/5Ba6o)

A heated row has broken out over a move by Britain's largest bakery chain to launch a vegan sausage roll.

The pastry, which is filled with a meat substitute and encased in 96 pastry layers, is available in 950 Greggs stores across the country.

It was promised after 20,000 people signed a petition calling for the snack to be launched to accommodate plant-based diet eaters.


But the vegan sausage roll's launch has been greeted by a mixed reaction: Some consumers welcomed it, while others voiced their objections.

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spread happiness@p4leandp1nk
https://twitter.com/p4leandp1nk/status/1080767496569974785

#VEGANsausageroll thanks Greggs

7
10:07 AM - Jan 3, 2019
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Cook and food poverty campaigner Jack Monroe declared she was "frantically googling to see what time my nearest opens tomorrow morning because I will be outside".

While TV writer Brydie Lee-Kennedy called herself "very pro the Greggs vegan sausage roll because anything that wrenches veganism back from the 'clean eating' wellness folk is a good thing".

One Twitter user wrote that finding vegan sausage rolls missing from a store in Corby had "ruined my morning".

Another said: "My son is allergic to dairy products which means I can't really go to Greggs when he's with me. Now I can. Thank you vegans."

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pg often@pgofton
https://twitter.com/pgofton/status/1080772793774624768

The hype got me like #Greggs #Veganuary

42
10:28 AM - Jan 3, 2019
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TV presenter Piers Morgan led the charge of those outraged by the new roll.

"Nobody was waiting for a vegan bloody sausage, you PC-ravaged clowns," he wrote on Twitter.

Mr Morgan later complained at receiving "howling abuse from vegans", adding: "I get it, you're all hangry. I would be too if I only ate plants and gruel."

Another Twitter user said: "I really struggle to believe that 20,000 vegans are that desperate to eat in a Greggs."

"You don't paint a mustach (sic) on the Mona Lisa and you don't mess with the perfect sausage roll," one quipped.

Journalist Nooruddean Choudry suggested Greggs introduce a halal steak bake to "crank the fume levels right up to 11".

The bakery chain told concerned customers that "change is good" and that there would "always be a classic sausage roll".

It comes on the same day McDonald's launched its first vegetarian "Happy Meal", designed for children.

The new dish comes with a "veggie wrap", instead of the usual chicken or beef option.

It should be noted that Piers Morgan and Greggs share the same PR firm, so I'm thinking this is some serious faux outrage and South Park KKK gambiting here.

 

[A-Logato]

This isn't enough. They need to take down foreign flags. Make it quite clear the only flags allowed to fly are the national or British flag. Anything else will be removed or defaced. Zero tolerance until the message is clear.

We need a big Baz to defecate on a Palestine flag, mostly just to see how the system treats it.

 

[Crunkle]

I cannot put into words how happy this news has made me.

BrewDog, creators of the worst £6 4-pack (1.2 litres total, btw) of watered piss you've ever tasted, are going bust. (Telegraph: A).
They've also closed 10 of their massive chrome hellscapes full of hipsters that they call "pubs".



I don't know where this trend came from with people enjoying chamomile and lemongrass IPA over a pint of John Smith's, but I'm glad it's fucking off.

 

[Geoff Capes Vapes Apes]

I cannot put into words how happy this news has made me.

BrewDog, creators of the worst £6 4-pack (1.2 litres total, btw) of watered piss you've ever tasted, are going bust. (Telegraph: A).
They've also closed 10 of their massive chrome hellscapes full of hipsters that they call "pubs".

View attachment 7792639

I don't know where this trend came from with people enjoying chamomile and lemongrass IPA over a pint of John Smith's, but I'm glad it's fucking off.

In fairness to Brewdog their Cold Beer is actually a good hot day gardening beer as it's that weak I'm fairly sure it rehydrates you, and is cheap as chips. The rest of their product line, 72 varieties of over-hopped shite and one OK stout, can get to fuck though.

"Craft beer" needs to die, bring back real ale

 

[Overly Serious]

I’ve found I needed it for very mundane lady things like working out how much fabric I need for things. Years back I had to upholster something roughly conical - I had a bit less than what I needed if it’d have been a cylinder but I thought well it’s not a cylinder is it? it’s a bit of an arc, and it’ll bend up a wee bit at the edges if you imagine it flattened out so it might just fit with this nice bit of ludicrously expensive liberty fabric I’ve found in the remnants bin for a steal, do I buy it? (Yes it did!)
How much fabric do I need to make a full circle skirt with a length of xcm and a waist of y cm?
Will this bit of furniture fit if we have to carry it upstairs and can only pivot it at this one place on the landing ?
How much stone do I need to buy to make a semi circular patio thingy?
How much icing do I roll out to cover this cake? How many packs is that?

And just the other day you and I were having a discussion in the thread about Britain's biggest penis (no, not Kier Starmer) and Pi*r^2 was used to estimate the volume of blood needed to elevate it. You remember!

I have an unbreakable dislike of Macbeth due to having spent 5 years straight of high-school with the teacher deciding that the chosen Shakespeare subject would be Macbeth.

I cannot fathom how you could have been taught Macbeth for five years in a row. That just makes no sense to me.

 

[Otterly]

You remember!

I was briefly tempted to go look up how much blood it actually takes but I think someone somewhere is already very confused at my search history.

 

[Super-Chevy454]

I dont like this. This is thumbs down at the coliseum stuff. We need to enshrine free speech in a constitution that protects us all and acknowledges our god given rights, not have popularity contests. Lucy connelly should not be in jail at all.

Sorry for the very late reply but I want to bump this where one guy said more harsher words than Lucy Connelly and being a leftist guy with leftist privilege, he's free.

 

[Kofi Drinka]

I was briefly tempted to go look up how much blood it actually takes but I think someone somewhere is already very confused at my search history.

Would a penis that big even be able to obtain a full hardon and not just a semi?

 

[Crunkle]

Haven't found a Christmas present for your politically-incorrect loved one yet? Why not try one of Reform's football shirts? Only mildly embarrassing and certainly not 100% polyester (it is). At the very least, it's been manufactured in England so that's one thing they got right.




Only £99.99 for a football shirt signed by Nigel Farage himself? WOW!

Buy now while stocks last!

Discount code: ZIAMADEMEDOIT

Reform UK (L / A)

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA. Pottery.

 

[ApeBass]

Has anyone seen any St George or Union flags locally as part of "Operation Fly the Colours"?

Roundabouts are also getting painted.

 

[Clem Fandango]

I cannot put into words how happy this news has made me.

BrewDog, creators of the worst £6 4-pack (1.2 litres total, btw) of watered piss you've ever tasted, are going bust. (Telegraph: A).
They've also closed 10 of their massive chrome hellscapes full of hipsters that they call "pubs".

View attachment 7792639

I don't know where this trend came from with people enjoying chamomile and lemongrass IPA over a pint of John Smith's, but I'm glad it's fucking off.

Beer, in this country, comes in pints or half pints. It does NOT come in 1/3 or 2/3 measures, and especially not for the prices these cunts charge for it. Suffah Brewdog.

Eta:

Haven't found a Christmas present for your politically-incorrect loved one yet? Why not try one of Reform's football shirts? Only mildly embarrassing and certainly not 100% polyester (it is). At the very least, it's been manufactured in England so that's one thing they got right.

Genuinely might get one of these lol. I feel the cringe would be worth it to annoy people I don't like.

 

[Brahma]

A Nigerian rapist that sexually-assaulted a 19 year old girl in Bournemouth has been let free due to his "troubled background and difficult life."

Daily Mail (Archive)

Here is Ayomide Famakinde, convicted rapist smiling after he leaves court.

View attachment 7770231

EDIT: Anyone want to collab with me on a website idea? I'm calling it "Foxes in the Hen House" and it will collect on a map details of all migrant sex crimes. Might be quite popular and will allow people to see how many of these rapists are in their area.

There used to be an excellent Google map back when you come create custom ones, mapping all the paki rape gangs by a guy called kaffircrusader.

Also used to be a great poster on 9chan and later gab that did infographics on black on white crime in the USA

Stuff like this:




He's still sporadically active

 

[Eddie Riggs]

Roundabouts are also getting painted.

They'll be the roundabout, the flags will make them out and out.

 

[SirCliveSinclairdabbing]

I cannot put into words how happy this news has made me.

BrewDog, creators of the worst £6 4-pack (1.2 litres total, btw) of watered piss you've ever tasted, are going bust. (Telegraph: A).
They've also closed 10 of their massive chrome hellscapes full of hipsters that they call "pubs".

View attachment 7792639

I don't know where this trend came from with people enjoying chamomile and lemongrass IPA over a pint of John Smith's, but I'm glad it's fucking off.

Black heart was a decent stout.

OTOH, can we condemn the town of wolverhampton for what they’ve done turning hobgoblin from a real ale into lager with red dye?

And just the other day you and I were having a discussion in the thread about Britain's biggest penis (no, not Kier Starmer) and Pi*r^2 was used to estimate the volume of blood needed to elevate it. You remember

Double post because Sunday.

How did you account for the grower vs shower volume disparity?

 

[Tom Nook's Gloryhole]

Brewdog has always sucked, I just assumed people tolerated the bad beer back when they were 'punk' because of their ideals. The second they got major investment from elsewhere there was no ideological reason to pick them over any other shitty brand.

Also I absolutely hate how their pubs automatically add a tip on, I go to any fucking pub in the UK and I don't have to tip to get my beer but the place that is serving 100% in house beers does? Get fucked.

And I say this as someone who isn't a complete beer snob, my favourite drink is an ice cold Leffe but have zero issue with a can of Carling or Boddingtons or Tennents or a bottle of Stella but 95% of Brewdog beers have the most disgusting chemical aftertaste that sours the enjoyment of my nearly £8 pint.

 

[Muad'Dick]

BrewDog, creators of the worst £6 4-pack (1.2 litres total, btw) of watered piss you've ever tasted, are going bust.

Fucking finally. I'll be glad to see the back of this hipster piss.

 

[Made In Wales]

Haven't found a Christmas present for your politically-incorrect loved one yet? Why not try one of Reform's football shirts? Only mildly embarrassing and certainly not 100% polyester (it is). At the very least, it's been manufactured in England so that's one thing they got right.


View attachment 7792933View attachment 7792937

Only £99.99 for a football shirt signed by Nigel Farage himself? WOW!

Buy now while stocks last!

Discount code: ZIAMADEMEDOIT

Reform UK (L / A)

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA. Pottery.
View attachment 7792946View attachment 7793008

Will be getting one, and I know what my next role on Football Manager 24 will be.

To the Moon! Or at least, the Premier League!

 

[Symbol of the Chud]

I cannot fathom how you could have been taught Macbeth for five years in a row. That just makes no sense to me.

My school basically allowed the teachers to choose which Shakespeare play they wanted to teach every year.
And every year they went with Macbeth by sheer coincidence.

 

[Overly Serious]

My school basically allowed the teachers to choose which Shakespeare play they wanted to teach every year.
And every year they went with Macbeth by sheer coincidence.

That's... beyond stupid. Firstly, Shakespeare is not something you teach to the lower years. It's frankly too advanced in both language and themes. With all due respect an eleven or twelve year old isn't going to "get" Shakespeare. So there shouldn't even be five years of Shakespeare. You could mean Sixth Form included but given the sentiments expressed I highly doubt you would have chosen to continue English Literature. And beyond the issue of five years of Shakespeare, no teacher should knowingly pick a play that was already studied. That's... absurd. You'd have to be an absolutely terrible teacher.

Speaking as someone who has studied Shakespeare and loves it, it makes me angry that there are teachers so bad they make kids grow up to hate it. I get that someone might not be interested in it. But to actually hate it tells me there's something going horribly wrong in our schools.

Double post because Sunday.

How did you account for the grower vs shower volume disparity?

It was about 14" long. I just assumed that was its measured state at already full length for my own sanity's sake.

 

[Symbol of the Chud]

That's... beyond stupid. Firstly, Shakespeare is not something you teach to the lower years. It's frankly too advanced in both language and themes. With all due respect an eleven or twelve year old isn't going to "get" Shakespeare. So there shouldn't even be five years of Shakespeare. You could mean Sixth Form included but given the sentiments expressed I highly doubt you would have chosen to continue English Literature. And beyond the issue of five years of Shakespeare, no teacher should knowingly pick a play that was already studied. That's... absurd. You'd have to be an absolutely terrible teacher.

Speaking as someone who has studied Shakespeare and loves it, it makes me angry that there are teachers so bad they make kids grow up to hate it. I get that someone might not be interested in it. But to actually hate it tells me there's something going horribly wrong in our schools.


It was about 14" long. I just assumed that was its measured state at already full length for my own sanity's sake.

the worst part was compared to the other shit on the curriculum, Macbeth was still the most engaging thing I recall studying.

 

[Tom Nook's Gloryhole]

English Literature at GCSE level will forever be a shit subject simply because the source material has to consider reading age, length of the book, equal appeal to girls and boys, quality of writing and quality of the book. Almost everything is disqualified by these means.

If Harry Potter didn't have such godawful writing in points it'd probably be the only modern book to qualify.