Brianna Wu / John Walker Flynt - "Biggest Victim of Gamergate," Failed Game Developer, Failed Congressional Candidate

[Pocket_Sand!]

Bollards can wreck such havoc on wheels, you know!

So can curbs, speed bumps, gutters, railroad crossings, other vehicles... the list goes on.

I imagine Flu as every bad driver I've ever encountered on the road throughout my life. From the stereotypical Asian woman who can't drive at all, to the 80+ year old mostly blind guy in a huge Cadillac, and everything in between, that's what I think encountering her on the road would be like. Flu is a rolling insurance claim, flailing down the roads, careening from curb to curb like a bowling ball in a lane with gutter guards.

 

[Dr. Merkwurdichliebe]

So can curbs, speed bumps, gutters, railroad crossings, other vehicles... the list goes on.

I imagine Flu as every bad driver I've ever encountered on the road throughout my life. From the stereotypical Asian woman who can't drive at all, to the 80+ year old mostly blind guy in a huge Cadillac, and everything in between, that's what I think encountering her on the road would be like. Flu is a rolling insurance claim, flailing down the roads, careening from curb to curb like a bowling ball in a lane with gutter guards.

You can look at the way John Flynt walks and know that he can't drive a car for shit. He moves like a spastic, drug-addled mantid.

And the idea of this six-foot-five, convulsing phasmid on a motorcycle is even more ludicrous. If he actually drove his cool-grrrl rice rocket prop at highway speed, he'd be dead.

 

[Ghostse]

Fucking FAGGOT re,tard Andrew Sullivan is at it again, in addition to being on the wrong side of history once more, he's also fucking obsessed with BIG BLACK COCK like all HOMOS are. Queers really need to shut their faggot mouths.

View attachment 1670229

>Protestors chanting abolish the police
>Articles about how the police can be abolished
>Defund the police #1 rallying cry
>Simpering mayors cut PD budgets
>BLM donation page takes you to defund the police

Its an emotional argument that BLM wants to eliminate the cops that have mildly reigned in their destructive rampages and looting.

 

[FatMan]

Not the first time, I think we're in year 3 and at least season 4 of the big wheel adventure where he's spent who knows how much of Frank's money on powertools to "save" money by restoring a set of wheels.

2018:
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2019:
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How 'bout them numbers, they make no sense.

I think "everything I do gets progressively more impressive each year John" might be in the running for my favorite John.

"I spent 400 and saved 1500".

Year later...

"I spent 60 and saved 3700".

He's like a fiend that has to keep upping the dosage to get his fix, and it makes it so obvious that he's completely bullshitting about all of it every time. Any actual car enthusiast that does their own mods and repairs can consistently tell you exactly what they paid for something. Yet ol' John here can't even keep his initial buying price straight, lowering it every time he mentions it to the point that it's now less than half of what he actually paid.

For context, and for those who don't remember (2014ish) here's another of John's unsolicited and totally genuine apology letters.

Seeing as how John wrote this himself, I think I've found the most honest thing he's ever written:

They have no idea what it’s like to be a woman, and neither do I...

 

[Smaug's Smokey Hole]

I think "everything I do gets progressively more impressive each year John" might be in the running for my favorite John.

"I spent 400 and saved 1500".

Year later...

"I spent 60 and saved 3700".

He's like a fiend that has to keep upping the dosage to get his fix

You hit the nail on the head and since @Water-T mentioned Wu driving up above:

2018


2019


2020
TBD

 

[AnOminous]

LMAO re,tard Orange Fascist doesn't even know that the fucking NIGGERS don't even have two RED CENTS to rub together, vote this fat fuck out of office!

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Even as a progtard, how is this a good look? Is he literally mocking Sudan for being poor and full of black people? I mean he does that to Mississippi too, but seriously wtf man? Is this like he somehow thinks it's okay to parade his filthy, abused dog in public? He will buy a new "Porche" while never, ever even grooming that poor animal? Is he literally completely oblivious to how horrible he looks?

Yet ol' John here can't even keep his initial buying price straight, lowering it every time he mentions it to the point that it's now less than half of what he actually paid.

Miss'ippi John is so perfect, such a fantastic mechanic, that even when a mechanic does work for him, the mechanic has to pay HIM for the privilege of doing work on a vehicle owned by master mechanic Miss'ippi John. Even the parking bollards he backs up into pay him.

 

[FatMan]

You hit the nail on the head and since @Water-T mentioned Wu driving up above:

2018
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2019
View attachment 1674246

2020
TBD

193mph?! I never knew that the old beater he restored in high school was a Lambo.

Miss'ippi John is so perfect, such a fantastic mechanic, that even when a mechanic does work for him, the mechanic has to pay HIM for the privilege of doing work on a vehicle owned by master mechanic Miss'ippi John. Even the parking bollards he backs up into pay him.

To be fair, the sand in the paint from the front yard rattle-can job on his 2001 Audi TT classic sports car was a nice touch, and swapping that shift-knob himself definitely saved him thousands in labor. Changing out the blown airbag and stereo was truly master level stuff too, it was obviously gamergate that ruined the electrical system in the process.

His skills only improved with the first Porche though. I remember he initially drove it 500 miles home with the oil warning light on, and every great mechanic knows that those stupid sensors are agents of the patriarchy and won't tell a true woman like John what to do. And who could forget him asking a forum full of strangers to identify what brand, model, and size his wheels and tires were? That was a true display of efficiency there, because who can be arsed to go out and read the fucking sidewall yourself when you've got a peggle marathon going on?

And that's just for starters. I'm sure we could go on for hours about his automotive engineering/mechanical prowess. Those schmucks are LUCKY to get the privilege to work on John's vehicles, so it's definitely money well spent for them to learn from the best.

 

[Mola Ram]

Is he literally completely oblivious to how horrible he looks?

John is totally oblivious to the fact that he looks like a melting wax figurine; of course he can't tell his hideousness extends to his pets, lifestyle, grooming, and spending habits.

 

[Peace and Harmony]

Sorry John, that makes you a full Nazi. Your execution has been scheduled.

 

[Water-T]

I think "everything I do gets progressively more impressive each year John" might be in the running for my favorite John.

"I spent 400 and saved 1500".

Year later...

"I spent 60 and saved 3700".

He's like a fiend that has to keep upping the dosage to get his fix, and it makes it so obvious that he's completely bullshitting about all of it every time. Any actual car enthusiast that does their own mods and repairs can consistently tell you exactly what they paid for something. Yet ol' John here can't even keep his initial buying price straight, lowering it every time he mentions it to the point that it's now less than half of what he actually paid.

In 2021: "I got these for free and saved $10,000!"

In 2022: "I was paid a million dollars to take these rims and saved an orphan from a burning building by doing a sick off-ramp jump and grabbing the kid as my Porch rammed through the flames!"

In 2023: "I was chosen to design those rims, and saved the world from annihilation by moon rocks with their built in anti-moonrock force field technology!"

 

[Peace and Harmony]

Might be something to do with the fact that you live in absolute filth and your fucking potato sack body has no immune system.

 

[Water-T]

Might be something to do with the fact that you live in absolute filth and your fucking potato sack body has no immune system.

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I'm sure living in a dusty hovel with filthy dogs and a screaming Chinaman breathing his bat-soup breath on everything doesn't help to create a healthy environment at Casa De Wu.

 

[Leibowitz]

This car is going to be such a great investment for John that it's about to start printing money all by itself!

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Truly this is the lie that won't die. It may be a $6000 car now after all the work John put into it, but that is not the price he paid for it. Check out Norvic's screencap from 2018:

Rescued this from the google cache before it expired. This is what she bought.

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I suppose 18K bucks qualifies as a bargain compared to the 100K she spent on the brand new one. I always wondered why she didn't get the more glamorous, less practical convertible. I guess she was just working up to it.

 

[Peace and Harmony]

Considering that you said that he would send trannies and faggots to the gas chambers four years ago and hasn't done it, I would say that's a pretty good thing overall.

 

[Baggywrinkle]

Still want to know how spending $500 on painting tires is any kind of bargain. Why not just wait until you put the winter tires on and then fix up the summer tires yourself? And why brag about spending $1000 for a single year of maintenance on a ”$6000” car? I thought any fix it needed could be done with a glue gun and 10 cent spark plug by master mechanic Brianna Wu.
Conversely, she never brings up the $100k Porsche or how much it costs in maintenance. “Guys I’m just like you, I have a cheap Porsche (pay no attention to the red penis replacement I sneak into random photos)”

 

[smackpops]

He paid !8K for that shit little boxster.

 

[Norvic]

You can't tell me that in a year where this happened:

Wu only spent 500 bucks on maintenance. She's lying and she didn't even need to lie, just not say anything.

 

[Mola Ram]

just not say anything.

But if he did that, he wouldn't get to brag about all the expensive toys the Celestial Paypig gives him in loving gratitude for ... for ... well, whatever Frank gets out of it is beyond me. But it's something!

 

[Particle Bored]

Might be something to do with the fact that you live in absolute filth and your fucking potato sack body has no immune system.

View attachment 1674452

Don't we have pics of Frank in a plain surgical mask when theyre out and about? So I think we have a fair toss up between lying about always wearing an N95, or just hoarding the N95s for himself and letting Frank make due with a square of toilet paper. (no wonder Frank was so giddy to get his very own box of N95s)

 

[Baggywrinkle]

Don't we have pics of Frank in a plain surgical mask when theyre out and about? So I think we have a fair toss up between lying about always wearing an N95, or just hoarding the N95s for himself and letting Frank make due with a square of toilet paper. (no wonder Frank was so giddy to get his very own box of N95s)

It’s just Wu calling in sick since her job amounts to shitposting on Twitter. This frees her up to talk about even more useless topics like being the 90th best player of Star Wars on baby Yoda mode.