So we got like a holy man, and some bitch reporter comes to interview him. He sits there chewing on his betel nut. After a while, he says to one of his acolytes, 'Go down to the Sacred Well and bring me a dipper of paregoric. I'm going to make with the wisdom of the East. And shake the lead outa your loin cloth!' So he drinks the P.G. and goes on into a light trance, and makes cosmic contact -- we call it going on the nod in the trade. The reporter says, 'Will there be war with Russia, Mahatma? Will Communism destroy the civilized world? Is the soul immortal? Does God exist?'
The Mahatma opens his eyes and compresses his lips and spits two long red streams of betel nut juice out through his nose holes. It runs down over his mouth, and he licks it back in with a long, coated tongue and says, 'How in the fuck should I know?' The acolyte says, 'You heard the man. Now cut. The Swami wants to be alone with his medications.' Come to think of it, that is the wisdom of the East. The Westerner thinks there is some secret he can discover. The East says, 'How the fuck should I know?'
