Brianna Wu / John Walker Flynt - "Biggest Victim of Gamergate," Failed Game Developer, Failed Congressional Candidate

[NQ 952]

John isn't a real person. Not real in the sense that he's aware of himself on a deep level. To him, how other people see him is who he really is. Appearance is everything. Behind the mask is nothing.

To be fair, would you really want to acknowledge yourself as a human being if you were Wu levels of a monstrosity?

I couldn't imagine the crises I would have if I was Wu and had to have just a slight bit of introspection.

 

[Smaug's Smokey Hole]

There are a few minor things that need to be changed for mobile platforms like controls, interface changes, and some resource optimization to make it all fit on a smaller system (in terms of both power and storage), but nearly all the code is cross platform, you just need to box it in the appropriate wrapper (and they do that for you) and it's ready to ship.

Oh, sorry, maybe I was unclear, I meant that taking the iOS version to PC was not difficult, iOS was the platform the game was made for and released on.

 

[Butta Face Lopez]

"I make decisions from data, not partisanship"

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If Brianna Wu had ever really been homeless and destitute, as she claims, she would well know the value of a half eaten sandwich.

As it stand, Brianna Wu can travel to Washington on other people's dimes to get Potbelly sandwiches.

 

[GaryGrey]

"I make decisions from data, not partisanship"

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I cannot unsee the similarities between Wu and Zoidberg

 

[Zbk3VmLfujjzjxBd43tL]

I wonder if Johnny's hit a wall at how big and powerful of a name he can be while having almost no actual achievements to his name (aside from being Brianna Wu and I'll throw in "making" a shitty game). Puff pieces can only go so far, eventually people are going to want to see results like, say, defeating a popular Massachusetts congressman in a primary election (or even putting up an impressive showing). I'd imagine if the other guy running in MA-8 was getting as much free press as our future congresswoman, he could actually be a bit of a challenge for Rep. Lynch.

 

[Peace and Harmony]

Yeah John, challenge him to a Pokémon battle and show him who's boss.

 

[Butta Face Lopez]

There are longtime legislators who talk of nothing but impeachment, including at people's funerals, but I'm sure the grotesque shrieking tranny would probably have a better shot

 

[AprilRains]

It has been said of LBJ that he could intimidate his fellow legislators into compliance with his imposing height and absolute physical assurance. I doubt that's all there was to it, but it'd be interesting to see if horror and disgust could produce similar results.

 

[Mola Ram]

It has been said of LBJ that he could intimidate his fellow legislators into compliance with his imposing height and absolute physical assurance. I doubt that's all there was to it, but it'd be interesting to see if horror and disgust could produce similar results.

If I could be assured of John spouting off early 21st century equivalents of the following gems:

"Better to have him inside the tent pissing out, than outside the tent pissing in."

"I may not know much, but I do know the difference between chicken shit and chicken salad."

"The crotch, down where your nuts hang, is always a little too tight." (Probably never gonna get this one from John, alas.)

"Fuck your parliament and your constitution. America is an elephant. Cyprus is a flea. Greece is a flea. If these two fellows continue itching the elephant they may just get whacked by the elephant’s trunk, whacked good."

Oh and my personal favorite:

"I'll have those niggers voting Democratic for the next 200 years."

... Then I would move to MA-8 just to vote for him. That's entertainment you can't put a price on.

 

[Coldgrip]

There are a few minor things that need to be changed for mobile platforms like controls, interface changes, and some resource optimization to make it all fit on a smaller system (in terms of both power and storage), but nearly all the code is cross platform, you just need to box it in the appropriate wrapper (and they do that for you) and it's ready to ship.

John would tell whoever told him that that he's an engineer and that they should stop mansplaining, followed by a smug post about how he applied thermal paste all by himself to key critical parts of the motherboard BIOS chip.

 

[Pickle Dick]

 

[Oh Long Johnson]

Oh boy. John's figured out how to bypass PACs for politibegging. Stay tuned.

 

[Elbe]

This cunt is DETERMINED not to get off his backside and knock on doors.

 

[Norvic]

If there's one thing I know it's that you're not going to change the world on twitter and facebook.

 

[AprilRains]

This is the most fun I've had since the hogs ate my brother's arm off.

 

[Dr. Tran]

Anyone got a link to the tweets in that brief period where Bri Bri got it in her head that going goth would make her a badass but instead she just looked like a tard?

I could use some laughs right now.

 

[Henry Bemis]

It has been said of LBJ that he could intimidate his fellow legislators into compliance with his imposing height and absolute physical assurance...

Don't forget Johnson's johnson.

 

[Burned Man]

I was going to say you don't have to deal with donor kings if you don't have any donors but then I remember all the backroom deals Wu does with Frank, the only campaign donor.

 

[Coldgrip]

I was going to say you don't have to deal with donor kings if you don't have any donors but then I remember all the backroomdoor deals Wu does with Frank, the only campaign donor.

Fixed for horrifyingly specific accuracy.

 

[Doug_Hitzel]

If I could be assured of John spouting off early 21st century equivalents of the following gems:

"Better to have him inside the tent pissing out, than outside the tent pissing in."

"I may not know much, but I do know the difference between chicken shit and chicken salad."

"The crotch, down where your nuts hang, is always a little too tight." (Probably never gonna get this one from John, alas.)

"Fuck your parliament and your constitution. America is an elephant. Cyprus is a flea. Greece is a flea. If these two fellows continue itching the elephant they may just get whacked by the elephant’s trunk, whacked good."

Oh and my personal favorite:

"I'll have those niggers voting Democratic for the next 200 years."

... Then I would move to MA-8 just to vote for him. That's entertainment you can't put a price on.

Nixon was a good egg too:

• We're going to [put] more of these little Negro bastards on the welfare rolls at $2,400 a family. Let people like Pat Moynihan and [special consultant] Leonard Garment and others believe in all that crap. But I don't believe in it. Work, work—throw 'em off the rolls. That's the key.

• I have the greatest affection for them [Negroes] but I know they're not going to make it for 500 years. They aren't. You know it, too. The Mexicans are a different cup of tea. They have a heritage. At the present time they steal, they're dishonest, but they do have some concept of family life. They don't live like a bunch of dogs, which the Negroes do live like.