Brianna Wu / John Flynt - DEAGLE NATION STILL LIVES

[Peace and Harmony]

Another productive day at GiantSpaceKat studios.

Spoiler: Nice stats

 

[AnOminous]

And I'll never understand people who voluntarily castrate themselves so I guess that makes us even.

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I never understand people that chop their cocks off and then subsist on a diet of jizz-flavored lead and cadmium drinks.

 

[soliloquyR]

This is just sad, even for Wu. She cheated even before getting class change. You could easily just go to the Peninsula of Power and overlevel there and it would be considered legit.

Anyway, game out yet?

It's as out much as John is out of the closet. Not.

 

[Sable]

Not even Wu could fail at V.

Despite being my favourite not-IX FF, with Objet d'arts you can grind with minimum effort... oh, right effort. She's gonna cheat and probably repeatedly mention Faris is awesome for reverse-trap reasons.

 

[Jaimas]

Another productive day at GiantSpaceKat studios.

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Spoiler: Nice stats

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Blatant cheating beyond quick-leveling confirmed.

White Wizard HP caps at 568.

Even if she somehow got perfect rolls (which is stastically impossible without save scumming), she'd have 700 max.

Wu confirmed for worse gamer than Jay Geis (and with worse jaundice).

 

[techno-confederate]

At least Wu is being honest though about not requiring a player to "master 15 buttons and two joysticks" as her game is basically a less advanced Simon Says with worse writing and visuals. And it's not like Wu is the only one who seems to believe this either, so many of the critically well received but shit indie games seem fall into the category of having controls only slightly more advanced that flappy bird (Gone Home, Sunset, etc.)

Press x to make hamfisted political statement truly is the height of gameplay and storytelling synthesized

Also Wu is just full of shit on this point. Telltale produces "games" that are basically visual novels but that didn't stop The Walking Dead from being one of the most popular games in recent memory. They've gotten so popular that they've done adaptations of Game of Thrones, Minecraft, and a bunch of other shit. "Hardcore" gamers have been playing narrative driven games since Dungeons and Dragons came out, Wu and other SJWs are just mad that no one likes their shitty "story driven" games that were written by hacks and morons.

 

[Cynical]

Blatant cheating beyond quick-leveling confirmed.

White Wizard HP caps at 568.

Even if she somehow got perfect rolls (which is stastically impossible without save scumming), she'd have 700 max.

Wu confirmed for worse gamer than Jay Geis (and with worse jaundice).

Inb4 someone tweets this at Wu and we suddenly see tweets deleted because he was caught in another obvious lie.

 

[Luminous Being]

Bless their stupid little hearts.

 

[soliloquyR]

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Bless their stupid little hearts.

TROOO G@M3R GÜRRRLZ

 

[Furina]

Your entire life is a dick flick, John.

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How many dick flicks do women have to sit through? As many as they want to, I'd imagine. As far as I can tell no one is ever forced to watch a movie outside of a classroom so really the question is "How many dick flicks do women choose to sit through?"

And speaking a woman, I loved Guardians of the Galaxy. It was awesome. Am I not qualified to call myself a woman any more, John?

 

[millais]

How many dick flicks do women have to sit through? As many as they want to, I'd imagine. As far as I can tell no one is ever forced to watch a movie outside of a classroom so really the question is "How many dick flicks do women choose to sit through?"

And speaking a woman, I loved Guardians of the Galaxy. It was awesome. Am I not qualified to call myself a woman any more, John?

I suspect the Godzilla of Tech Feminism was forced to watch the in-flight movie during the trip to Winnipeg when her iPad ran out of batteries or was damaged by Diet Coke spill from the angry old banker-bro in the next seat over

 

[CervixHammer]

Your entire life is a dick flick, John.

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"dick flicks".

a small Canadian lesbian called from three years ago to rate John's tweet "late".

 

[RomanesEuntDomus]

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Bless their stupid little hearts.

Now's a good time to point out she cheated....

How many dick flicks do women have to sit through? As many as they want to, I'd imagine.

If you've got that impression, the dick-flick-enforcers of your local patriarchy-council are doing a really bad job.

 

[Von Clausewitz]

"dick flicks".

a small Canadian lesbian called from three years ago to rate John's tweet "late".

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I know, right?
It is as if there are thousands and thousands of SJWs around, constantly screaming mysoggyknee, who -by doing so- indirectly discourage writers from writing female leads or something.

 

[Peace and Harmony]

I have so much confidence that you know exactly what you're talking about, John.

Also I must be posting from beyond the grave now because I've lost track of all the meteors that have struck the planet. Happy Monday, Kiwis.

 

[Von Clausewitz]

I have so much confidence that you know exactly what you're talking about, John.

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Also I must be posting from beyond the grave now because I've lost track of all the meteors that have struck the planet. Happy Monday, Kiwis.

Actually that is quite telling when it comes to Wu: She has no idea that it not just matters how much money you spend, but how you spend it.

 

[Eli Whitney]

i can never understand people getting their dicks cut off then ending up pegging their hubby's ass with a strap-on

Yeah, seems counter intuitive.

 

[Furina]

Yeah, seems counter intuitive.

Well you know what the say: You can cut the man's dick off, but you can't cut the man off the dick. And John is nothing if not a massive dick.

 

[Norvic]

Every time Wu describes her high school experience it gets a little more Dickensian. I'm expecting gruel and 12 hours a day unpicking hemp rope next.

I really wish high school education was included on the Flynt CV so we could say for certain that all this stuff she's been saying was total lies.

 

[DragoonSierra]

It's not illegal if you don't get caught.

How the fuck did I not notice this?

I made a hack of FF1 back in the dark ages, so I know the NES coding and more than a bit about how and why the game's mechanics do and don't work at specific times. Little-known fact: The levels of the NES version are fixed; every character gets the same levels, more-or-less, with minor variation, based on class. Given that, we can easily see that to have that much HP, based on class, Brianna would need to have each character:

Fighter: 35
Black Belt: 40
White Mage: 41
Black Mage: 44

Why is this important? Because it is virtually impossible to get higher than level 38 or so through regular gameplay, and beyond 40 or so with bog-standard grinding. You start requiring around 30,000 XP a level around level 35, which means that while the actual level hard-cap is 50, it's an absolute chore for a character to reach with normal gameplay. The only people who would even try are those insane enough to try a Four Thieves run (the hardest thing in the entire game), where the level matters.

There's so many things in the final dungeon that can fuck you up as well. Gorgimeras have a party-wide petrify, Iron Golems have a party-wide instant death, Evilman can cast both Flare and Death, Lich in the second encounter casts Flare constantly, Dark Fighter and Dark Mage can spam offensive magic and the latter another instant death spell, an encounter with a pack of Green Dragons can be over before it starts if they get a surprise round, you have to fight the Death Tyrant (Super version of the Beholder boss that spams both petify and death spells and packs a tougher punch than the final boss in melee), and of course, Mind Flayers, which are the worst enemy in the entire game. You can do everything right and Chaos can still murder your ass if you're not careful by virtue of casting Flare repeatedly.

Brianna Wu clearly didn't just level-grind - she Game Genie'd hard, essentially removing all challenge from the game.

Most of that stuff you mention is easily negated by having Ribbons which you have 3 of when you get to the final dungeon. Rhyos's petrify attack is resisted by Ribbons and the Aegis Shield. Any Death attack that isnt Poison, Earth or Time Elemental is resisted with the Protect Ring and ones that are are resisted with Ribbons. And the Kill spell only works if one of your characters is below 300HP and isnt resistant.

When it comes to things that can cast spells and skills they only do so in a certain order. Flare is second on the Evilmans list and he has to use Dispel before that. He also only has a 25% chance to cast a spell at all. Dark Fighter and Dark Wizard cast nothing that cant be resisted.

Lich is not all that rough. His first spell is Flare and his next spells are Stop, Warp, and Kill. Anyone without Ribbons is going to have a bad time but casting Nul All on the 1 character that doesnt protects him from all 3. Alternatively you could slap a Black Robe on your Black Wizard for Time resist and give the Ribbon to the other character. Despite all that Lich only has 500 HP and if hes not dead by the 3rd turn your doing something wrong. If you can survive the Flare spell youre pretty golden.

Death Eye is nothing. His first 5 spells are Stop Warp Dispel Break and Death and he can spam the Glare skill any time he wants. Warp and Glare are Time based Death attacks and Stop is Time based too. Again Ribbons and Nul All are the way to go.

Green Dragons are indeed a problem. Their Poison Gas can be resisted but if you get caught with 4 of them thats bad. I dont think they can ambush since they are unrunnable battles.

Mindflayers. Fuck these guys. The only reason they are an issue is because of a bug where their Status attack does not have an Element set in their data so therefore their Death attack doesnt have a resistance check. This is fixed in later versions or the game.

Chaos is a pushover. Flare is the 8th spell on his list and he has to get through a bunch of elemental -ga spells to get to it. Curaja is 4th on that list though and it will heal him to full. As far as his skills go he has Earthquake first on the list which is Earth Elemental but will be resisted by Ribbons and Nul All. The rest are Inferno Tsunami and Cyclone. Inferno can be resisted but the others are non elemental.

In addition to all of the above mentioned, there's also this fucker;

Seriously, fuck him.

He only shows up in the Flying Fortress on the way to Tiamat and is a rare encounter. If he does show up youre in trouble though.

Another productive day at GiantSpaceKat studios.

View attachment 94429

Spoiler: Nice stats

View attachment 94430

Blatant cheating beyond quick-leveling confirmed.

White Wizard HP caps at 568.

Even if she somehow got perfect rolls (which is stastically impossible without save scumming), she'd have 700 max.

Wu confirmed for worse gamer than Jay Geis (and with worse jaundice).

According to this White Mage can have up to 676 on average at max level.
http://www.gamefaqs.com/nes/522595-final-fantasy/faqs/57009
What is that program BTW? And what hack did you make for FF1?

I have so much confidence that you know exactly what you're talking about, John.

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Also I must be posting from beyond the grave now because I've lost track of all the meteors that have struck the planet. Happy Monday, Kiwis.

We need to start picking better quality teachers and start paying them more. We pick our teachers from the bottom 50 percentile of scores. We also need to get rid of teaching colleges that do not perform to a certain standard.