🐱 Barack Obama’s Shocking New Revelation

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Barack Obama, no stranger to controversy, waded into an extraordinarily contentious area of American life on Wednesday when he revealed his pen preferences. The former president told the New York Times that when composing longform writing, including his recent book A Promised Land, he prefers to sketch out his first drafts by hand, rather than on a computer. What’s more, like all true stationery nerds, Obama is “very particular” about his writing tools, preferring the combination of yellow legal pad and black Uni-ball Vision Elite rollerball pen with a micro-point.

When it comes to paper, Obama could do better. Sure, he was a law professor, and old habits die hard—but your basic legal pad tends to be made from low-quality, highly porous paper, which soaks up ink, potentially blurring the precision of the former president’s aperçus. Pairing that paper with a fine-tipped rollerball should minimize bleed-through and feathering, though, so his favorite writing tool is a solid choice. It’s a liquid-ink pen with good flow, and, according to the Uni-Ball website, its patented technology “protects against water, fading, and fraud,” a matter important to public officials, even retired ones.

I can imagine an adviser counseling a leading Democrat to avoid associating himself with a writing instrument with the word Elite in its name—but it’s an important distinction that establishes Obama’s stationery cred. There are two main lines in the Uni-Ball Vision series. The Vision is the base model—available in eight colors and two tip sizes, with a manufacturer’s recommended price of $2.75. That pen is merely “fine,” said Brad Dowdy, proprietor of the Pen Addict blog and host of the Pen Addict podcast, which released its 440th episode on the day Obama dropped his rollerball bombshell. The Vision, known as the Uni-Ball Eye in the U.K., is prone to “unmetered gushing.” Unbecoming of a former president.

Uni-Ball charges 50 cents more for the Vision Elite, but Dowdy told me it’s well worth it—“it writes well without bleeding,” he said, and it’s airplane-safe, which is handy for a guy who spends a lot of time in the air. The Times took care to note that Obama’s favorite has a “micro-tip,” but Dowdy, who favors extra-fine tips, thinks that’s a misnomer. “The .08mm writes like a 1.0, and the 0.5 is like another pen’s 0.7.” In other words, it could be finer.

The Pen Addict rates The Vision Elite as the second-best rollerball option, behind the Pilot Precise V5. As a person concerned with such matters herself, I prefer a retractable pen, so I’d recommend the Uni-ball Signo RT1 UMN-155, which comes in a 0.28 mm tip—fine as hell. Paired with some smoother paper—say, a Rhodia No. 18notepad, if Obama prefers a top-bound book—it’s a setup fit for a former president.
 
Obama is a literal cockroach that comes out of the woodworks the moment he is no longer in danger of Otange man hitting him for illegally tapping his 2016 campaign.
 
I'll give them credit, they found a new and slightly (by like 0.01%) less obvious way to stick their tongue up his ass.
 
How the fuck does this qualify as news? Do anyone out there - at all - care what Obama uses to scribble his garbage with?
 
One thing that is fundamentally wrong with this story is; Did Obama's pen ever match one of the classic Clinton suicides? That's what I call Presidential choice, especially if you want to kill yourself by 47 stabs to the back.
 
How the fuck does this qualify as news? Do anyone out there - at all - care what Obama uses to scribble his garbage with?
The pen preferences of world leaders, current and former, are great advertising for pen companies, and people are highly interested in it, surprisingly.. Supposedly, pen choice also says something about character. JFK's Parker pens are sorta famous amongst pen circles.

We've known what pens Obama used during his tenure as president, but not the pens he's used since leaving office.

One thing that is fundamentally wrong with this story is; Did Obama's pen ever match one of the classic Clinton suicides? That's what I call Presidential choice, especially if you want to kill yourself by 47 stabs to the back.
He actually did carry on using the same kind of pens as Clinton and subsequently Bush used. Trump carried on the unofficial tradition.
 
I have to admit, it's at least nice to see a new flavor of click-bait.

Instead of the usual "this is going to piss me off. I know this is going to piss me off.... GOD DAMNIT!" kind of clickbait, this was more like "This is going to piss me off. I know this is going to piss me off.... GOD... wait, wut? I'm not mad, I'm just confused." Then I noticed all of the links to amazon et al, and realized the article is probably just a cunningly hidden ad for pens.
 
So how many shortform ads do you think they crammed into this long-form ad?
Surprisingly only one.

But they did jam this into the bottom of the page.
SmartSelect_20201211-081523_Brave.jpg
:story:

PS: here's the WATP roast of the Pen Addict Podcast.
 
It's a Slate article, but I'm highly disappointed that no one involved in the article rated how the various pens feel when you shove them in your urethra or up your ass.
 
It's a Slate article, but I'm highly disappointed that no one involved in the article rated how the various pens feel when you shove them in your urethra or up your ass.
I prefer a pilot tip myself, though I have to admit that could just be sour grapes at not being able to afford a Gaia High Luxury Omas...

(Dear Autististic internet sages of the future. This is a joke.)
 
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How the fuck does this qualify as news? Do anyone out there - at all - care what Obama uses to scribble his garbage with?
Remember when Obongo was President and the media reported on every little thing he did including what he had for breakfast?

Biden's presidency will be a repeat of that, except much worse, because the media would have a lot of catching up to do since Orange Man prevented them from doing so for 4 years.
 
Is there a reason that Obama is becoming so relevant once again? Is biden so unpopular with the DNC core they have to remind everyone of Obama?
 
How the fuck does this qualify as news? Do anyone out there - at all - care what Obama uses to scribble his garbage with?
I have to admit, it's at least nice to see a new flavor of click-bait.

Instead of the usual "this is going to piss me off. I know this is going to piss me off.... GOD DAMNIT!" kind of clickbait, this was more like "This is going to piss me off. I know this is going to piss me off.... GOD... wait, wut? I'm not mad, I'm just confused." Then I noticed all of the links to amazon et al, and realized the article is probably just a cunningly hidden ad for pens.
I'm angry because clickbait is clickbait.
 
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