Are Jews vampires?

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They must be a pretty advanced form of vampire since they can operate in daylight. The challenge rating of your average Jew must be in the upper teens.
 
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Agamemnon Busmalis said:
They must be a pretty advanced form of vampire since they can operate in daylight. The challenge rating of your average Jew must be in the upper teens.
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Actually sunlight was never fatal to vampires until Nosferatu. This was made up to give the film a more climatic ending. In the original novel, Dracula could walk in the sun but his powers were weakened.
 
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How about the other vampire myths, like garlic? Also, according to Seth McFarlane's animation, the only way to protect yourself from gay vampires is to plug your asshole with garlic.
 
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I dont see much difference to be honest
 
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The Angry Video Game Nerd said:
Actually sunlight was never fatal to vampires until Nosferatu. This was made up to give the film a more climatic ending. In the original novel, Dracula could walk in the sun but his powers were weakened.
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Good point, you reminded me of Dracula being able to walk in the daylight.

That was a damn good book. That scene in the beginning with the vampire women was really creepy.
 
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Basically, yes. Blood has to be shed during a Brit Milah (circumcision) 8 days after the birth of a male child.

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The Jewish vampire or Jewpire is one of the most deadly variants of the creature. Beware especially if you have large sums of money and if you have a newborn son!
 
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Bram Stoker's novel, Dracula , was inspired by a historic record he found about Vlad The Impaler, or Vlad Drăculea, But he filled in some blanks using fears of Jewish invasion at the time when many Jews were immigrating to England.


While allegory and authorial intent belong solely to the author and nobody else, it is a little easy to read between the lines.
 
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Vampires hate garlic.
I've never seen a Jew eat anything without caking it in garlic powder or garlic butter, or sautéing it in garlic. They love it more than Mexicans love tomatoes and black people love petty crime.
So my theory is vampires are a denomination of Jews, but not all Jews are vampires.
 
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European jews and gypsies have vampiric ancestry, hence why they both love eating small children, which is a leftover from their need to suck blood, and surrounding themselves with trashy displays of wealth, as they subconsciously try to turn their habitat into the ones of their forefathers, needlessly fancy yet ruinous castles and dank gothic mausoleums.

The rest however have descended from goblins, as seen by their gold-hoarding behaviour, small stature, and large noses.
 
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