A lot of people have been asking me about Asperger's syndrome and some of my experiences with it and some of the conditions. This is largely because, on the internet at least, I seem to be good at hiding it. Most people I meet here don't know that I have Asperger's syndrome unless I directly tell them. I do have it, but what exactly does it mean? First off all, please don't use this as a way to diagnose yourself. If you think that you have Asperger's syndrome, depression, or any other mental condition please see a licensed psychiatrist. You cannot self-diagnose mental conditions. (Hmmm... I kind of have that symptom sometimes, I MUST have this disorder!) Asperger's syndrome is known as a high-functioning autism, and as such many of the symptoms are similar, and yet, in some ways it's very different.
The most notable symptoms of Asperger's syndrome come from issues with social interaction. Most people seem to notice this because there are a lot of people claiming to be an asshole on the internet because they have asperger's syndrome. Asperger's syndrome does not make you an asshole. What it means is that they have a hard time learning all of the non-verbal parts of social interaction, like body language. Believe it or not, one thing that I cannot do with people I don't know very well (even some people I do) is look them directly in the eye. It locks me into anxiety. I'm able to get around this by looking in the general-eye area when I have to do that, but that's just me. And yes, social anxiety is very common in Asperger's syndrome, although it most likely isn't a direct syndrome. People with Asperger's syndrome tend to stick to themselves in school and such, and the kids who stick to themselves tend to be picked on. It actually would not be easy for them to break out into conversations because it's physically and mentally exhausting. If I've had an extended conversation with a lot of people by the time I get to bed I have a headache and I'm fatigued, almost as if I did a workout.
Asperger's syndrome might not explain why I've been an asshole to someone, but it does explain why lately I've been obsessed with Pokemon. One of the hallmarks of asperger's syndrome is how they react to their hobbies and interests. Once they find something that they like doing, they need to learn everything about it, and can spend days/weeks on that particular thing. Sometimes though, those interests change. Yes, a person with Asperger's syndrome can have their entire life revolve around model planes one month and then 80's sitcoms the next. Even though it often changes, don't knock their passion. It can go up to almost fetish-levels of interest. On the plus side though, they seem to rotate. This isn't the first time that I've personally gotten this into Pokemon. This is kind of a double-edged sword though. These rotating interest can actually make it hard to find a career that they'll be happy with for a sustained period of time. On the other hand, they pick up a lot of knowledge on various activities and may make good writers (the more knowledge you have on fringe subjects, the better). Coincidentally, people with Asperger's Syndrome are very easy to shop for. So yes, if you're wondering why lately I've been obsessed with Pokemon I can legitimately blame it on Asperger's syndrome. The only time this becomes a problem is if I start to derail conversations to talk about my latest interest. You're free to call me out on that if I o it.
The way people with Asperger's syndrome think is a little bit weird. Remember that joke in Family Guy where Quagmire is listening to a radio song in his head? Well, that's actually kind of the way that I think... except instead of songs, it's movies. My memories and thoughts are highly visual, and yes, this has been an absolute blessing in writing my scripts for my reviews. It also leads to highly logical thinking, and I mean Phoenix Wright level of "logic." This is why sometimes I give the weirdest metaphors. This is why they have a hard time socially interacting. Society is not logical. People are no logical. They do unpredictable things, and unpredictability, a place where things cannot be properly accounted for, is a nightmare to someone with Asperger's Syndrome. People with Asperger's Syndrome tend to speak their mind without regards to the feelings of others. This has been a blessing and curse to me, if you've seen well, any of my videos. But on the bright side that kid who says he insulted you because he had asperger's syndrome? You can rest assured knowing that that was his actual opinion and he's not trying to hide it.
One of the best media portrayals of Asperger's syndrome I can even remember is River in To the Moon. There are some spoilers here, so if you haven't played the game, go do that. River wants to tell her husband Johnny of a secret between the two of them, so she keeps making origami rabbits. Johnny has memory problems, so there isn't a way for him to "get it." Most people would think that the easy way out is just for River to tell Johnny the secret, and to most people yeah, it is. To a person with Asperger's syndrome communication is a huge problem. They do these things, almost to the point of speaking in code, and hope for the other person to "get it." This is because this is the easiest way for them do things. They may do a weird action on purpose, hoping that you'll ask for it because they don't know the appropriate time to start a conversation. However, this isn't working because the weird action isn't as weird as they thought, or to think that the action is weird the other person would need significant knowledge of a sub-culture or interest.
This has actually been the most apparent for me, and the one I've had the hardest time dealing with. I fully know what I should say to a person for them to understand what I'm thinking, but at points I almost physically do not have the ability to do so. And oddly enough, it's more hindering with people that I know personally than the ones that I don't. The best thing you can really do is ask them questions to get a conversation started. Just keep in mind that you're going to be the one to constantly keep the conversation going. Also, if they seem annoyed, they probably want to be left alone. And yes, they are likely to keep doing this one thing until someone gets the hint... even if they never do.
Some other things? Extremely sensitive to sensory information. For me, it's specifically touch and taste. I cannot wear a tie or turtleneck, or it legitimately feels like someone is choking me. I find ketchup too spicy (I know that it's more tangy; the taste of the vinegar in it registers similar to spicy in my mind). So yeah, I cannot eat even foods that most people don't consider spicy because it's too intense for me. There are also foods that I don't like solely based on the texture, like onions. The texture of receipts legitimately grosses me out. You know that feeling you get when you're about to pick up dog shit? Imagine a slightly less intense version of it when I'm about to pick up a receipt. And sleeping? Not if it isn't silent and completely dark. I can focus on a mundane task for a lot longer than most people. I'm able to do extremely tedious work for hours on end.
Keep in mind that how severe someone has Asperger's Syndrome does vary from person to person, and some people may have more than one condition, or they may have personal quirks that are just them and not any specific mental condition. It's also not an excuse for being an asshole. I don't even think that it's an explanation really. But yeah, for those of you asking, that's what having Asperger's Syndrome is like.
