🍗 Deathfat Amberlynn Reid - 600 pound pathological liar and U-Haul lesbian moving in with her next live-in maid/nurse/girlfriend.

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Slippery_Slope said:
Going to Disneyland? Where thousands of people can see her and film her like that dude at the laundromat? No way.
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I believe that she went to Disneyland when she was living in foster care, at least she mentioned that a long time ago. In her 128 reasons to lose weight, she mentioned that she would like to go back. Of course, Amber is more into dreaming than doing.
 
Amber, you have chapped lips cause you NEVER drink water. You're dehydrated. Drink some fucking water instead of the other shit you drink.

Also, smaller packaging always costs more cause it's less cost effective for companies to fill up small packages instead of big ones.

Oh yeah and get a ceramic hob scraper for your next wax spill.

Out of the goodness of my heart I will charge you zero dollars for these life lessons which at your age you should really have known.

Edit: It's like she's willfully as ignorant and incompetent as possible.
 
*** VLOG ALERT! ***
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K5sUJ35Lwu0
Invidious: https://yewtu.be/watch?v=K5sUJ35Lwu0

Not worth a proper recap. "MommaLynn" is "shown" because she leans over and makes a face at the camera during Bingo. Amber buys new "Sparkling Ice" sparkling water (diet soda) flavours and tries one. Amber talks about her hair. Amber wears a fugly dress as a shirt (that in all fairness would look fugly on ANYONE) and cuts off the big witchy sleeves with kitchen scissors to make it slightly less fugly. Amber buys 4X black pants from Woman Within and says that "they fit" as she struggles to get them on (and ignores the fact that these are loose-fit pants that she's wearing as tights). This was purely done for the excuse of showing off the current state of her laaaayyyygs.

Here, because Amber obviously wants you to see them:
laaayyyygs.png

You're welcome.

Amber also gets an Amazon haul and says this....
shoes.png

.... regarding SLIPPERS. Imagine supposedly losing 83.4lbs (572.4 to 489), and needing to lose more weight so your feet can fit into one size fits all SLIPPERS.

Amber's gorlfriend also sent her a picture of the moon, and Amber was mesmerized because for a second she thought it was a self portrait:
local58.png

... Amber's on our left, in case you're confused.

"The moon when we became one" is supposedly a personalization done by Valentine, yet sounds remarkably close to something that Amber would put in her poetry. Also, HAVE YOU EVER EVEN BEEN IN THE SAME ROOM TOGETHER?

Images courtesty of Bottle (@BottleYT)
 
LonesomeDud said:
Only women would find trash like the moon when they first had lesbian sex vaguely interesting. 0/5
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Well, women get fed all kinds of romantic expectations from society (only to get disappointed), so can you really blame us?

Also, stunted BPD bitches really love cringy occult stuff like the moon.
 
Lesbian Grandma said:
You guys thinks amber is having sex?
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Remember when she couldn't even say the word, she'd have to spell it out. I was never sure if she was trolling or genuinely embarassed, inexperienced. I will speculate for sure she's most likely never experienced a sexual orgasm. I say sexual because she experiences food orgasms daily when she binges.
 
Slippery_Slope said:
Oh yeah and get a ceramic hob scraper for your next wax spill.
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Who needs a scraper when you can use an iron and kitchen roll?
Gets rid of every trace of wax from hard surfaces and fabrics, as well 🤷🏻‍♀️

Mekahineyho said:
buys a dress with bells sleeves and cuts them offView attachment 5922197
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I've not watched her in months because 1) she's boring as all hell and 2) somehow she has managed to hit heights of insufferability I'd never thought possible, but for some reason I did watch this one

What the FUCK was she thinking?!? (I know I know, it's Albert so 'not much' is the likeliest answer)

You can't tell me that wasn't rage bait, she buys a $70 dress that for once was actually nice and verged on flattering (as far as you can flatter a 600lb hog) so she butchers it with kitchen scissors, just so she could show off more lard? Why not just send it the fuck back?!?
 
EvaBraunsGhost said:
Who needs a scraper when you can use an iron and kitchen roll?
Gets rid of every trace of wax from hard surfaces and fabrics, as well 🤷🏻‍♀️



I've not watched her in months because 1) she's boring as all hell and 2) somehow she has managed to hit heights of insufferability I'd never thought possible, but for some reason I did watch this one

What the FUCK was she thinking?!? (I know I know, it's Albert so 'not much' is the likeliest answer)

You can't tell me that wasn't rage bait, she buys a $70 dress that for once was actually nice and verged on flattering (as far as you can flatter a 600lb hog) so she butchers it with kitchen scissors, just so she could show off more lard? Why not just send it the fuck back?!?
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She probably bought it because the deranged soul she’s pretending to be in a relationship with probably mentioned they like witches or Stevie nicks. Everything about her is so off putting I don’t know how people get the urge to interact or spend time with her.
 
Mekahineyho said:
She probably bought it because the deranged soul she’s pretending to be in a relationship with probably mentioned they like witches or Stevie nicks. Everything about her is so off putting I don’t know how people get the urge to interact or spend time with her.
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Ah you could well be right you know, considering her recent waffle about wanting a snake and to learn electric guitar (although considering the dumb fuck can't hold a make-up brush or cutlery even close to properly that makes that extremely unlikely 🤣)

I don't for one minute think there's a new ass-wiper incoming (or that said person bought her a fucking moonphase pic) but I wouldn't be surprised if she's talking to someone as I noticed during this vlog that her accent seems to be morphing into yet another new one 🤔

Definitely agree though, I'd rather live on the streets than willingly spend a minutes worth of time in her company, off-putting is definitely one way of describing it, there's just nothing appealing about her whatsoever is there?
 
EvaBraunsGhost said:
...she buys a $70 dress that for once was actually nice and verged on flattering...
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Um... WHAT?!?
as above so below.png

In what alternate reality is ^this^ anywhere NEAR hailing distance of being 'flattering'? (The correct answer is NONE - Amber wearing this is an attrocity in EVERY universe). The odds of this person Amber's talking to being some BPD "Earth-Goddess" Neo-Wiccan is getting better by the day. This looks like something Amber would pick out if she needed something to wear to the next Sabbat (which is Beltane in less than 2 weeks, if anyone was wondering), but she didn't feel comfortable with the idea of attending 'skyclad'.

All (most... well, some) joking aside, I do agree with you that this was intended as rage-bait. She does something with ALL of her clothing to make it as unflattering as possible to try and get engagement: undersized loose pants as leggings, dresses as shirts, shiny metal tops that make her look like either a malfunctioning melted T1000 or a section of a starship BULKHEAD . Oh, and according to Bottle's video, this... thing is currently on sale for just under $50 USD, so she totes just trolled her audience AT A DISCOUNT! (by Amber logic).

LonesomeDud said:
Lesbian sex might be interesting to men. Moon cycles? No.
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As I recall, Amber did an entire cunty TikTok on that subject...

EvaBraunsGhost said:
Definitely agree though, I'd rather live on the streets than willingly spend a minutes worth of time in her company, off-putting is definitely one way of describing it, there's just nothing appealing about her whatsoever is there?
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Does anyone suspect that this may be a really, REALLY good troll stringing Ambo along? Or even just another degen like wifey? Well, better start prepping...
wheel year.gif

Though I must admit that I'm NOT looking forward to when Amber digs out her special ed training wheels tarot cards again and tries to morph into GypsyLynn.
 
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Boolean Bitch said:
In what alternate reality is ^this^ anywhere NEAR hailing distance of being 'flattering'? (The correct answer is NONE - Amber wearing this is an attrocity in EVERY universe).
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Well, ackshually in my somewhat (limited) defence I did say 'verged on flattering (as far as you can flatter a 600lb hog)' lmao - and that's a particularly horrendous screenshot even for Amber 😂

I just thought the floaty bell sleeves looked better than how she normally looks like an over-stuffed sausage casing bursting out her sleeves lol

Definitely agree with the rest of your post though - the odds of it being some sultry Wiccan goddess (ahem, trog, we've seen her exes) she's fixated on are pretty damn high at this point

I wouldn't be at all surprised if it's a troll either, I'm amazed it's not happened before in all honesty
 
Muddy Fupa Balls said:
Remember when she couldn't even say the word, she'd have to spell it out. I was never sure if she was trolling or genuinely embarassed, inexperienced. I will speculate for sure she's most likely never experienced a sexual orgasm. I say sexual because she experiences food orgasms daily when she binges.
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Her weird attitude towards sex/her own body just goes directly against her suggestive behavior online.

EvaBraunsGhost said:
Who needs a scraper when you can use an iron and kitchen roll?
Gets rid of every trace of wax from hard surfaces and fabrics, as well 🤷🏻‍♀️
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Meh, too much work for lazy old me. Also, last time I ironed anything was like 5 years ago. Not sure my iron does even still work.
________________

@Boolean Bitch I really hope it's another BPD nutcase. Would love that for her. They'd have the truwest and bestes love of all times.
 
lol I just took the bell part off the sleeves of a top I own, because they flap around and are a pain in the ass.

I can't imagine Amber wearing that dress much. How will she show off her chest fat when she wants to pretend she's sexy? The neckline's too high for that.

INB4 she starts talking about how pagan she is and how she's always been into crystals an shit. Remember the storage thing full of tumbled rocks she had back in KY?

Ladies? It's okay to just like pretty rocks because they're pretty. No need to pretend they have psychic energy or meaning.
 
Mekahineyho said:
She probably bought it because the deranged soul she’s pretending to be in a relationship with probably mentioned they like witches or Stevie nicks. Everything about her is so off putting I don’t know how people get the urge to interact or spend time with her.
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Dana said that the only thing Amber talks about is food, restaurants, and eating. How do you engage with other people when this is your only subject of conversation. She did not do well in school, does not read newspapers and is not up to the latest national and international stories. I think that she got lucky with her previous girlfriends, perhaps not Jade, as they were as dumb as Amber. She is having a tougher time now.
 
Turd Fergusson said:
Dana said that the only thing Amber talks about is food, restaurants, and eating. How do you engage with other people when this is your only subject of conversation. She did not do well in school, does not read newspapers and is not up to the latest national and international stories. I think that she got lucky with her previous girlfriends, perhaps not Jade, as they were as dumb as Amber. She is having a tougher time now.
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Hey, now she can talk about bingo, the casino, getting her nails done and...I guess, the food she eats at bingo and the casino.
 
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