🍗 Deathfat Amberlynn Reid - 600 pound pathological liar and U-Haul lesbian moving in with her next live-in maid/nurse/girlfriend.

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lostinwoods said:
How can she even shower properly?
She's 600 f'in pounds. Her "showers" must last 1 hour minimum for a basic clean, and you'd need multiple towels to dry. How much is Jade getting paid for this shit??
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One time, Amber told this story about when - I think she was in the girl's group home - they had to sell cookies or something. Anyway, in the story, Amber stole one (or more than one) box of the cookies that her teacher bought, then told us that she hid in the bathroom and ran the shower while eating the entire thing. She was so nonchalant in how she talked about hiding with the shower running, I figured that this was a regular thing for her. I suspect that many times she's told Jade that she's taking a shower, then just sits on the toilet playing on her phone with the shower running or something. MAYBE she gets in for a minute to get her skin and hair a little damp to look like she washed, but no real washing is happening. Probably also the reason why Amber had a collection of, like, 50 bottles of body sprays and a dozen bottles of cheap, overpowering drugstore perfumes when living with Becky and the boys.

Situation Type Deal Gorl said:
I agree, and I'd toss "food addiction" to that shitpile as well. She has disordered eating for sure, but so does half the population because we're turning into a nation/world of fucking couch potatoes. I'm convinced at this point that WALL-E was a documentary (minus the happy ending)...
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Not exactly a hill that I'm gonna die on, but I still think she fits into the 'addict' category. I mean, not all addicts are the same. And her story definitely does NOT compare to the factory worker who is seriously injured due to workplace negligence, then develops an opiod addiction from pain meds because they have to get back to work before they're properly healed in order to support their family. Or the war vet with PTSD whose alcohol addiction started with needing to drink in order to fall asleep at night after returning state side. Amber is 'addicted' the way folks like sex addicts are 'addicted': self-absorbed narcissists who demand instant gratification and spend all day chasing dopamine highs without giving a fuck about who they hurt in the process. And this continuous behaviour has completely fucked up and rewired her brain.


Oh, and in other news, a little-known Amberlynn Haydur Channel 'Windows95' got a candid statement from Amberlynn about her weight loss journey and Haydur Nation in general!! I didn't even know this channel existed - Sabine did a react on the video (it's not worth watching Sabine's video):


[Joking - it's AI done with audioship. It's not bad. It doesn't quite sound 'fat' enough - if that makes sense. Amber's voice kind of sounds a bit... distorted? As if the insides of her cheeks and her tongue is getting in the way when she talks. And it's too fast. Amber speaks really slowly. It's also missing that hint of a badly immitated southern accent she does. At least it's not filled with 'molments' and 'situation type deals'. Still though... watch out, Amber: If you're not going to provide entertainment for us, then Skynet will on your behalf]
 
In this installment of FailureLynn Wastes 9:42 Of Our Time, she shows us the stuff she puts in her purse but DOESN'T flash a stack of cash. Money's tight I guess.

Don't watch this shit.
It is just literally a waste of time, you can see on her face she KNOWS she's making people waste time and not giving any entertaining content (and it thrills her!) and the way she puts plastic bottles in the fridge is almost as irritating as the way she points her fat dirty finger at things or the way she throws tiny items in her bag along with larger items instead of putting them in a zipper pocket so they don't get lost.

If I was this much more invested I would be tempted to make and mail her a bunch of thinspo posters.
 
FatalTater said:
In this installment of FailureLynn Wastes 9:42 Of Our Time, she shows us the stuff she puts in her purse but DOESN'T flash a stack of cash. Money's tight I guess.

Don't watch this shit.
It is just literally a waste of time, you can see on her face she KNOWS she's making people waste time and not giving any entertaining content (and it thrills her!) and the way she puts plastic bottles in the fridge is almost as irritating as the way she points her fat dirty finger at things or the way she throws tiny items in her bag along with larger items instead of putting them in a zipper pocket so they don't get lost.

If I was this much more invested I would be tempted to make and mail her a bunch of thinspo posters.
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I’d like to believe that if a kiwi started seriously cow tipping they’d be a lot more …….creative than what these fucktards send her.
 
In the words of Rickie/Eric: no one cares!

What a boring video. That mini fridge looked minuscule, what was even the point of it?

She lives within walking distance of what appears to be a nice park, has a Whole Foods across the street, and so on. Shame it’s wasted on Amber, who never goes outside.
 
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SHES SO OCD GUISE look at that DUST
 
I'm sure she'll mention the dust in the next vlog, y'know she hasn't dusted because she's been struggling with something behind the scenes that she can't talk about and it's really hard for her right now. Some bullshit like that.
 
Xenomorph said:
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SHES SO OCD GUISE look at that DUST
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It's her hobby, you know.


tzgnilki said:
the dry food comes from ALR thinking oil adds too many extra calories and uses water as a replacement, and she claims to have some kinda phobia of tap water-probably based on flouride conspiracy theories
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Yeah, I get that about the food, because she always mentioned it in the videos, but there had to be an actual origin story for it. She didn't come up with that on her own because she doesn't have a single original thought in the fat head of hers.

The water thing is just stupid. I've been looking at compilations people have been doing that include clips from all eras, and she happily slurps down drinks when they go out to eat in all of them. Does she seriously believe those are not made with tap water?


Edit: I notice the FitBit is no longer hanging on for dear life on that fat balloon wrist of hers. Did it finally die? Commit suicide?
 
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Thank god she got that dainty mini fridge for her bedroom. We can't be huffing it all the way to the kitchen to fetch our pre-chilled future ocean plastic every time our taste bud gets a little parched now, can we?
 
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