🍗 Deathfat Amberlynn Reid - 600 pound pathological liar and U-Haul lesbian moving in with her next live-in maid/nurse/girlfriend.

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Based on @Boolean Bitch's recap, it sounds like Amber was sitting for 95% of the video. When was the last time we saw her really walk? I think it might've been when she was filming herself walking into/out of the doctor's office, but even then, Jade brought the car to the entrance of the building. We're definitely gonna hear in 2024 (if Amber makes it until then) that she was bedbound in 2022.

If Amber is really bedbound (she's certainly housebound), then she's definitely not making it to 2024. With housebound/bedbound comes death. And it comes pretty fast. Look at Jennifer Armstrong. Even Dr. Now tells the patients that if they become bedbound, death will come for them. And Amber's cyanosis is looking more obvious. Her hair and skin looks constantly greasy which means she isn't even birdbathing or whores bathing.

If Amber followed Jen, I would not only not give a single wet fart, I'd laugh for a day or two and look up the NEXT 25 deathfats who are already shambling in to take her place.
 
So now we’re blaming lipedema for her massive gut too?
Riddle me this, Amber. Weighing 500 pounds is not a symptom of lipedema. If lipedema is at fault for the shape of your appendages (which is normal for lipedema), AND you’re an extra special case (for an already rare disease) who has lipedema fat on your abdomen, where the fuck are you supposed to lose that 500 pounds from? Damn, what a crazy coincidence, I guess no where.

Which is not to say that lipedema fat can’t be lost, it’s just supposed to be considerably more difficult (insert photos of anorexics with lipedema here). Nevertheless, lipedema can’t create fat from nothing, so one of the treatments for the disease is weight management.
This bitch is rotting my brain.
 
Okay, I watched the fucking video. 25 minutes(!!!!!!!) I will never get back.

There’s a shot of her feet while she’s randomly walking. Okay? Wanna prove you’re mobile?

Then she tells the camera all about how she’s about to judge a movie and make some great review only to fall asleep through it and give no opinions. Waste of camera time, but at least she got in a shot of all the movie popcorn she had! (Gotta focus on the important stuff…)

She gets her titanic that she’s been wanting and talking about FOR MONTHS as a HUGE SURPRISE GUYS and the reaction is…not there. Just that one shot of her toothless mouth open and then scene. You couldn’t act surprised because you knew it was already there. Because you bought it.

She goes into how she CANT TALK TO MALE THERAPISTS BECAUSE BAD MEN IN THE PAST!!!! And yet, this is the first I’ve heard of it. She made up rape allegations to get pity, if she really DID have a history of male abuse you damn well sure would have heard it come up a million times by now. It’d be another excuse for her fat.

Tl;dr Amber is a fat liar who lies.
 
I bet Amber bought that Lego set herself and just made Jade present it for the camera. She’s been blathering about it for weeks and Jade don’t have that kind of money. And before Christmas?!

Nah, that kind of irresponsible money blowing has Amber written all over it.
Here we can say that Amber is special. What does a 32 year old woman wants for her birthday? Jewelry, nice clothes, a vacation somewhere nice? Legos does not make the list of most women.
 

HUGE early birthday surprise!! & disgusted with the comments | days 16-17 | vlog​

Nov 25, 2022
https://youtube.com/watch?v=1SejJoLrKC8

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Lol, isn't the general recommendation NOT to weigh yourself everyday? Even people half her size have sizable fluctuations, but I'd completely believe a 20lb swing within a day ,in either direction, is possible in her case.
 
Al sitting all giddy about a Lego set while her desk slowly raises so she can roll her fatt ass out from underneath is so god damn funny.

I hope wipey goes away for the holidays, amber is at the desk and the motor decides to yeet itself followed by her having to call the fire department to help her out.
 
The thing is, only for genuine collectors would that Lego Titanic be a great gift.

It's too expensive for a child and the average person would find no point in it, she wants it because it's expensive and makes her seem ''unique'' and ''quirky''. Her pretend hobbies appear and disappear as quickly as her diets.

I highly doubt she has a dedicated, well maintained space for these Lego builds.
 
does Big AL even know any actual history about the Titanic??
seems more like $700 worth of uber eats down the drain, it proves she makes enough money to sustain whatever lifestyle this shit is and she's 100% content with that.
 
She doesn't even know shit about Lego to make it a special interest. That's what makes this funny af. Come on fatty I'll give you some content and homework while Mommy/Daddy isn't home

Who created Lego when where why & how

How much is Lego worth
Who owns it now
Most unique Lego set to date

Come on fatty Lego word vomit for us.

Just fucking talk about something besides what you put in your fucking mouth please

You're welcome ❤
 
Anybody wanna bet she watches LegoMasters every fucking episode? Sorry... the show is GAY. The faggots appearing on it living their Lego dreams are GAY. Every fucking thing about Legos has become GAY. Legos have become the absolute idolatry of rampant fucking consoooomerism.

Go the fuck outside. Use real bricks. Build a fucking garden and grow something useful. Stop playing with kindergarten toys as a fucking adult! JUST FUCKING STOP IT, YOU WORTHLESS FUCKING MORONS!

Hamber adopts the mantra of every worthless fuck in society today. Refuses to grow up, refuses to adult her obesity, and continues on playing with children's toys.

Here's my Legos.

20221126_153410.jpg 20221126_153432.jpg
 
does Big AL even know any actual history about the Titanic??
seems more like $700 worth of uber eats down the drain, it proves she makes enough money to sustain whatever lifestyle this shit is and she's 100% content with that.
Yes she wrote a lesbian cruise story. The boat was bigger than the Titanic, had a different er for every problem, and in case you don't remember she tells you about 100 different times that everyone has a vagina.
 
Based on @Boolean Bitch's recap, it sounds like Amber was sitting for 95% of the video. When was the last time we saw her really walk? I think it might've been when she was filming herself walking into/out of the doctor's office, but even then, Jade brought the car to the entrance of the building. We're definitely gonna hear in 2024 (if Amber makes it until then) that she was bedbound in 2022.
I didn't include this in my reeecap, because I originally assumed that she was exaggering her movements for engagement. There was a short clip where the camera was filming her from a distance and she walked out from a room and took a few steps. Her gait was noticably worse than the scene of her walking down the hall with the LEGO globe. She was rocking back and forth almost as if one leg was a little shorter than the other. Her stomping on that twisted ankle rather than bothering with proper aftercare and physio may have caused long term (permanent for her) damage. I don't know if she actually COULD recreate her iconic 2 minute and 12 second walk to the tree anymore. She'll never admit that, of course, but will rather blame her non-existent 'asthma'. I mean, skinny people don't become immobile from falling off of a sidewalk into a 1" deep divot.

Oh my God, she's really doing the subtle but not subtle ''I was totally hurt by men, it's like y'know super hard for me'. Very believable bud. Any other tales of woe to reduce your responsibility for being a fat cunt?
Does she forget we've seen her drunken attempts at flirting with boys? So desperate to have them show her a shred of attention.
When I used LOLCOW Translate to convert that section from Amber-ese to English, the translation said she can sense he wasn't buying her bullshit like the female counselor did, and she needs an excuse to stop seeing him.

So now we’re blaming lipedema for her massive gut too?
Riddle me this, Amber. Weighing 500 pounds is not a symptom of lipedema. If lipedema is at fault for the shape of your appendages (which is normal for lipedema), AND you’re an extra special case (for an already rare disease) who has lipedema fat on your abdomen, where the fuck are you supposed to lose that 500 pounds from? Damn, what a crazy coincidence, I guess no where.

Which is not to say that lipedema fat can’t be lost, it’s just supposed to be considerably more difficult (insert photos of anorexics with lipedema here). Nevertheless, lipedema can’t create fat from nothing, so one of the treatments for the disease is weight management.
This bitch is rotting my brain.
The craziest part is that lipedema isn't even a rare disease. Uncommon perhaps, but not rare. It's estimated that 11% of women have it. Statistically speaking, there are likely individuals in this thread who have the trait (as well as many, many of her subscribers), but don't have her physical deformity or weeping skin because they put in the effort to keep themselves at a relatively reasonable weight. You know, rather than averaging 4000 calories per day to balloon themselves to 500lbs. Amber is in her current situation-type-deal-molment because she's spent her entire life eating as much as she felt she could get away with. Point-blank-period-hole.

Quote:
"Lipedema is metabolically the opposite of obesity – both are associated with excess fat accumulation, however, obesity presents with fat accumulated in the central area of the body, primarily in the abdomen, and is associated with diseases such as diabetes, high blood pressure, high cholesterol, and cardiovascular disease. However, lipedema presents with peripheral fat in the extremities, while the abdomen and/or waist are typically unaffected."

Hmm, Amber, I'd NEVER accuse you of lying (yeah I would)... but are you 'exaggerating/embellishing' your medical stories again? Like the Doctor's Office Weight Loss Challenge(TM) that was totally a weight loss challenge but totally wasn't?

Yes she wrote a lesbian cruise story. The boat was bigger than the Titanic, had a different er for every problem, and in case you don't remember she tells you about 100 different times that everyone has a vagina.
That SO deserves a lunacy rating (but I recently learned it's a neg rate towards the poster rather than a funny positive rating of the comment), so I'll stamp it here for your comment instead.
:lunacy:
 
Yes she wrote a lesbian cruise story. The boat was bigger than the Titanic, had a different er for every problem, and in case you don't remember she tells you about 100 different times that everyone has a vagina.

Hello, Darling

a Novel
by Amberlynn Reid


------------------------------------------
Chapter One: Juniper | June 1, 2017; 6:24am
------------------------------------------

"How do you always talk me into doing crazy things?" I asked my best friend, Memphis, a total blonde bombshell walking 5'11 on petite feet.

"How is this crazy? We are literally going on an "Only Girls" cruise for a month. There will be naked pool parties, alcohol, random hookups, and a ton of lesbians." Memphis giggled and added, "Okay, you are right, Juniper. This is a bit crazy but this is going to be a blast."

"You had me at 'Only Girls.'" I laughed. We are both lesbians but the complete opposite of one another. Memphis is a long haired blonde with brown eyes, while I'm standing with short dark hair and blue eyes. Memphis loved shopping and fake pink nails, while I liked leather jackets and skinny jeans. "This is any lesbians paradise." I added.

We both happily arrive at Hello, Darling. Hello, Darling is the cruise that was just set out for only females. It was like no other kind of cruise ship before because nothing was off limits, with very little rules, and the ship would never stop for a full month besides when gas was needed and even then, no one was allowed off the ship. It was a seclusion I was going to love.

The ship was huge, almost resembling the size of The Titanic but Hello, Darling was white and in pretty pink cursive writing was the ships name on the side of it. Everywhere I looked there were girls.

Dark girls, light girls, short, tall, fat, skinny, butch, and femme but they all looked excited and we were all here for the same reason; fun, relaxation, and hopefully hookups. 2,000 passengers and each one had a vagina and the thought excited me.


...end of Page One, and end of Chapter One.
The awkward writing found in this "novel" gives considerable insight into why -- when faced with the task of intelligently, interactively critiquing literature with her book club members -- Big Al was at a loss, panicked, and chose to immediately shut down the club.
She blamed the members for "ruining the club" by wanting something from her she couldn't understand.
Simple: They wanted discussion.
Meanwhile, Al expected reviewing books would be just like she reviews food, all done-and-dusted with a quick "Itz schoo goood!"
These few, short chapters of "Hello, Darling" must have been painfully difficult for her to write..and it shows because it's exceedingly painful to read.
If you're interested, the rest of Hamber's novel (she only finished about a dozen pages) is HERE.
Bon voyage vaginas, only lesbians! 👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩
 
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Lego sets are like Funko Pops. Having one or two related to something a person really likes is honest autism. Having so many that it makes the subject arbitrary is blind consoomerism because no matter how many extra steps are involved, it's still just a plastic thing to look at. It's cool when Legos are used creatively, but that actually takes skill and knowing what one is doing. I would imagine Amber relies heavily on those instruction books.

Amber likes lego because she wanted them when she was a kid but she couldn't have them then. Maybe having the biggest and most expensive set that's been made so far is a security blanket over going broke.
 
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