🍗 Deathfat Amberlynn Reid - 600 pound pathological liar and U-Haul lesbian moving in with her next live-in maid/nurse/girlfriend.

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nooo said:
Oh no. No. Noooo! I didn't even think of that. I saw the rope and didn't say shit about it. This and her saying she's horny is as much of a nightmare for me as fasting is for the Amburgular. I need my farms therapist from the other day.
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Amber BDSM
Bondage Amber.jpg
 
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nooo said:
Oh no. No. Noooo! I didn't even think of that. I saw the rope and didn't say shit about it. This and her saying she's horny is as much of a nightmare for me as fasting is for the Amburgular. I need my farms therapist from the other day.
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You rang?

Lie down on the couch and tell me what you're thinking...

Oh, I see. Somehow you've let your subconscious mind believe that Hamber intends to use the rope in role-playing as Dom Jade's submissive cuck. Fear not, I can assure you that's not the case. You see, you've let your mind go to deep, dark places. The reality of the rope is that Jade cannot bench press 500+ ellbees or get her arms around Hamber. So, when Hamber gets stuck on the toilet, as she often does, Jade ties the rope around her waist, runs it through a block and tackle pulley installed between the 2x4 studs in the bathroom ceiling, then ties it beneath Hambers gunt and uses her massive leg strength to pull Hamber's welded-to-the-toilet-seat ass back up on her own two feet. I assure you there is no Freudian sexual connotation to the rope. For this rope is just a rope.

Today's session will cost you either one like or a drink.

:drink:
 
I've never in my life seen anyone buy so fucking many treats for their pets. Seriously, it's unreal. I swear every time this bitch does one of her retarded hauls she pulls out a new bag of treats. And the most ironic part is that the only one of Amber's pets that can actually do a trick is Jade. No wonder she's getting fat.

(Edited for typo)
 
I am convinced this is why Big Ham loves soft food (mashed potatoes, rice, etc.):


Even things like soft chicken, such as a rotisserie chicken - but not so much the skin:

With rice, as we can see in the first vid here, and again last night, it seems rice merits just three quick chews before she moves it to the oral cavity and then swallows, a lot of times already bringing up another bite before she has completed swallowing the previous bite. Same with the rotisserie chicken, which is also 3-4 chews. Things that take longer to chew and swallow interrupt that flow of her shoveling food into her face as quickly as she can, and we all know that if you eat faster, you get more. When I originally started counting her chews for some comment I made whenever, I really did not know that from that point on, my brain would not let go of it, so I wound up seeing it all the time. Ugh.

ADHD said:
A Dollar Tree haul? Oh goody, just what everyone has been waiting for! :story:

Seriously, this video only exists so she can claim this shit on her taxes, right?
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If you buy things for use on your channel - in your videos, or support iyems like ring lights, etc. - those can be witten off. But if it's just shit you're buying for only personal use, like more fucking journals, soap, and so on, those cannot be written off.

Til Beeze Do Us Part said:
How many bars of soap do these two go through? Didn't she just spend well ofer 100 bucks on Bath&Body Works?
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Think of Big Al's skin surface area. She probably goes through a full bar every two showers -so, one bar would last two weeks maybe?

Til Beeze Do Us Part said:
Also, new swag idea, "Dash Hound". WTF. Forgive me for not being a native speaker, but I can't imagine it's a new way to say dachshund that has really taken off and is actually being used? I mean.
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But she assured us the other night that she's funny! I can think of some merch using "dash hound" that would be actually be funny, but I'm not spilling those thoughts for this bitch. I've given her enough already.

Slappy McGherkin said:
Oh, I see. Somehow you've let your subconscious mind believe that Hamber intends to use the rope in role-playing as Dom Jade's submissive cuck. Fear not, I can assure you that's not the case. You see, you've let your mind go to deep, dark places. The reality of the rope is that Jade cannot bench press 500+ ellbees or get her arms around Hamber. So, when Hamber gets stuck on the toilet, as she often does, Jade ties the rope around her waist, runs it through a block and tackle pulley installed between the 2x4 studs in the bathroom ceiling, then ties it beneath Hambers gunt and uses her massive leg strength to pull Hamber's welded-to-the-toilet-seat ass back up on her own two feet. I assure you there is no Freudian sexual connotation to the rope. For this rope is just a rope.
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It would be easier if there was a mechanized hoist system to pull Big Ham's fat ass off the can. It would save the "gf's" back. One rated for Big Ham's weight could get a little pricey, but your back and neck health is worth it.

 
I Have A Kiwi Allergy said:
This is something I don't tend to tell about myself, but I feel it's pretty relevant to the topic at hand. Back in October, I was diagnosed with a form of alopecia, and the stress from that, working a shitty job while attending college, and moving to a new state fucked me up even more mentally. I had reached my highest weight, and it hurt. I decided that I needed to do something about it, so I quit my job to focus on school and bettering myself, with the help of doctors. Since then I've been able to lose weight and feel the healthiest I've been in a long while. I still have shitty days of course, but I don't blame it on the shit Hamber blames her shitty days on. It infuriates me that Amber has had SO MANY opportunities as well as people reaching out to try and help her, and every single time, without fail, she never fully takes those opportunities. Every single time, she toys with the idea of help, and then once the buzz around starting this new "journey" fizzles out, the cycle just continues. I cannot at all feel bad for her. She has had so many chances, chances I and many others would have killed to have, just to throw them in the fucking garbage and cry on stream while binging on whatever brown slop her live-in-nurse of the month is forced to feed her. I seriously cannot stand to listen to her bitch about her weight and do nothing. She needs to go back to touchy shit with her greasy, swollen hands at whatever backwards country store she can fit her trusted scooter into. She needs her side characters back because God knows she is the most boring person on this planet.
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I Have A Kiwi Allergy said:
Am aware. Too TMI for sure, but I just find it so interesting to juxtapose me and her. She can simply get off her fatass and just decide to fix everything, but she won't. She has all this money that she can use to better herself but she uses it to gorge out on takeout multiple times a day. Watching her do this to herself helped me fix myself.
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How did you somehow end up more autistic and fat than the idiot who posted their weird Amberlynn pillow ??

Anyway Amber is fat and drunk and I still clicked off her livestream to watch Chantal instead. She's a dying star.
 
I Have A Kiwi Allergy said:
Am aware. Too TMI for sure, but I just find it so interesting to juxtapose me and her. She can simply get off her fatass and just decide to fix everything, but she won't. She has all this money that she can use to better herself but she uses it to gorge out on takeout multiple times a day. Watching her do this to herself helped me fix myself.
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We don't. Back to Reddit newfag
 
pistolwhipped said:
I've never in my life seen anyone buy so fucking many treats for their pets. Seriously, it's unreal. I swear every time this bitch does one of her retarded hauls she pulls out a new bag of treats.
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I know she doesn't give a fuck but isn't the Dollar Store like... the worst place to buy pet food? Feel like I've heard or read that somewhere. As if Twinkie doesn't have it hard enough living with this fat bitch, at least Jade is walking her on the regular
 
Agoodpotroast said:
I know she doesn't give a fuck but isn't the Dollar Store like... the worst place to buy pet food? Feel like I've heard or read that somewhere.
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Yes, it's one of the top 10 worst things you can buy at these cheap places. It's one thing buying some shitty colouring pens and a blank sketchpad but pet food has some seriously slippery standards and I quote, "When it comes to your four-legged friends, you might want to avoid buying pet food from a dollar store. Many folks have found that giving cheap food or chewables to the dog means having a violently ill pet. For dollar store pet food, pay special attention to expiration dates and the ingredients list, as you would for any food product. Often, sticking to name-brand pet food is your best bet, especially if there are dietary restrictions for your dog or cat. Additionally, you might discover you'll get more bang for your buck at big-box stores."

So yeah, this big bitch who let all her 'health bars' expire ages ago doesn't give a shit about her pets and never has. Why buy them safe, healthy treats or god forbid, take Twinkie for a walk when you can stuff your bottomless gob with $3k of takeaways a month?
 
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Either she has been reading here and is trolleeeeeeeeeeen, or Wipey definitely has some DDLG/ age play thing going on. Crayola map? Rub on dinosaur tattoos???
 
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